hardstones 发表于 2003-7-12 10:24:45

I use ets's SoreItNow two times and both got 4 score. I will take the test

I will take the test next monday. Banzhu mm, Can you give some comments and suggestion for me. I hate 4 score, i need a 5 score. the followling is the two issues and two arguments.

Over All Score: 4
Score: 4
Explanation of Score:
A 4 paper presents a competent analysis of the issue and conveys meaning adequately.

A typical paper in this category

-- presents a clear position on the issue
-- develops the position on the issue with relevant reasons and/or examples
-- is adequately focused and organized
-- expresses ideas with reasonable clarity
-- generally demonstrates control of the conventions of standard written English but may have some errors
Topic:
"It is important for higher education to challenge established traditions and values."

Present your perspective on the issue below, using relevant reasons and/or examples to support your views.
Your Answer:
What's object of education? To provide society with well-round worker or to set free the heart and mind? This is a enthustically discussed issue, especially in the age with rapid chang in the development of the technology and in complicated human life. Is the task of education has been changed? I agree with the speaker that higher education should teach and encourage the student to challenge established traditions and values. Although many people agree conceptually that education should be engaged in setting free the students' hearts and mind, it's the case that people, including some educationist, actually perfer to indoctrinate the established values to student. What cause the difference between the conception and the practice? Firstly, teachers think it's their responsibility to show us the established value in ethic or academic field, which has been illustrated by generations and been currenly observed and accepted by majority. This is a good intention. It's also be effective in elementary education, at which level the students has been developed their view of world. However in college level, students are in need of developing the ability of critical analysis and thinking. No matter what's major they have, the ability is so important that can play a vital role in their business or academic research. Therefore, educator should encourage student to challenge those established values. Although the result may be depressive, the students can learn much from it , such as the independent thinking and skeptism. Secondly, it's the inborn nature of people that we are afraid of change and instead want a stable life. Simarly we are afraid of being aloof. we feel safe when we hold the same values with the majority. It's beyond criticise. But we should not indulge in such superficial and unproductive safety. If so, society will be stagnant. We benefit much from those who have belif in pursit of truth and contend with the established but somehow misleading values. For example, Bruno would give up his theory in the price of being burned up. Such example are abound in the development of the science. We should not take all the predecessor's dedication for granted. We also have the reponsibility of leaving something valuable to our posterity, in science or in art. Initination and originality is indispensible for making progress. But just as opportunity always favor prepared mind, inspiration can arrive in our mind only when we have the ability and courage to challenge the established values. Education should work as a media to transfer such idea to the students. Conformity can be conducive to stable society, but to improve our society, we do need the originative and initivative citizen, no matter their majors are in academic or in business field. So education should take this task, to encor


Score: 4
Explanation of Score:
A 4 paper presents a competent critique of the argument and conveys meaning adequately.

A typical paper in this category

-- identifies and analyzes important features of the argument
-- develops and organizes ideas satisfactorily but may not connect them with transitions
-- supports the main points of the critique
-- demonstrates sufficient control of language to express ideas with reasonable clarity
-- generally demonstrates control of the conventions of standard written English but may have some errors
Topic:
The following appeared as a letter to the editor of a local newspaper. "Five years ago, we residents of Morganton voted to keep the publicly owned piece of land known as Scott Woods in a natural, undeveloped state. Our thinking was that, if no shopping centers or houses were built there, Scott Woods would continue to benefit our community as a natural parkland. But now that our town planning committee wants to purchase the land and build a school there, we should reconsider this issue. If the land becomes a school site, no shopping centers or houses can be built there, and substantial acreage would probably be devoted to athletic fields. There would be no better use of land in our community than this, since a large majority of our children participate in sports, and Scott Woods would continue to benefit our community as natural parkland."

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument.
Your Answer:
In this argument, the author draw the conclusion that Morganton(M) residents should vote for the plan to build a school at Scott Woods(SW). However, the conclusion is based on two or more unwarranted assumptions. It's quite possible that the two assumptions are questionable, thus the conclusion is unconvincing. In the resonsing line, the author set two assumptions. One is that there will no shopping centers or houses on SW if a school was built. Howerer, there is no evidence to support the assumption. It's quite possible that the committee will build some luxiary houses on SW and change it into a convenient community, for they will also build a school there to make the community resident's children get convient education. It's also possible to build some shopping center there to equip the community with diversified function and consequently make their houses competitive in market. So school building is just part of the plan. Given that the committee will exclusively utilize this land as school and surely no shopping centers and houses will be built. The second unwarranted assumption is that when school was build there, substantial acreage would probably be devoted to athletic fields. There is no guarantee that there will be abundant area for sporting. Although the land may be very large, the committee probably will build a large-size school, aimed to get over100,000 enrollment. So it will make the area noisy and crowded. Even the students will be short of sporting area, let alone the resident's children. Admittedly, there are enough sporting area for the resident's children, it's also doubtful whether the children will choose as their parents desire. For maybe the publc transportation coming here is not convenient, then children would not come here for playing. To sum, the argument is based on two or more doubtful assumptions. If the assumption is unwarranted, the conclusion is also questionable. To better evaluate the arguing, the author should provide more information to support the assumptions and therefore support the conclusion.

hardstones 发表于 2003-7-12 10:30:45

My issue and argument scored by Ets ScoreItNow,

I will take the test on the next monday, Jul, 14. The following is my writing scored 4. Can anyone give me some suggestion to get improvement? bow!!!!!! so nervous and feared!!!!!!!!

Score: 4
Explanation of Score:
A 4 paper presents a competent analysis of the issue and conveys meaning adequately.

A typical paper in this category

-- presents a clear position on the issue
-- develops the position on the issue with relevant reasons and/or examples
-- is adequately focused and organized
-- expresses ideas with reasonable clarity
-- generally demonstrates control of the conventions of standard written English but may have some errors
Topic:
"Our declining environment may bring the people of the world together as no politician, philosopher, or war ever could. Environmental problems are global in scope and respect no nation's boundaries. Therefore, people are faced with the choice of unity and cooperation on the one hand or disunity and a common tragedy on the other."

Present your perspective on the issue below, using relevant reasons and/or examples to support your views.
Your Answer:
It's not far away for the wind and dirt to run from Janpan to Moxica, so it's not difficult for us to understand that environment is the the task which need the most effective cooperation. Athough soliders can suffer from the World war II's fighting front, if they have adequate luck, no luck can be expected to live a healthy and happy life if we don't take some actions on protecting the declining environment. Destructive wars can be partly justified by considering the distinct and always conflictive country interest. However, the war to protect the environment, if defeated, will cause the sole result, that's no one living on the earth can befenit from the defeat. I can illustrate my position with some environmental problem. One is global warm effect. Clearly, the temperature all over the world had been raisen in recent years, and it is said that such tendency will be continued in the future. What is the real reason has not been gotten consensus between sciences, but the cause has been appeared and it is a curse for us. No one country can escape from its effect. Some developed country has complained that they have put emphasis on the environmental protection idea and also have put much money on the action. they think they are responsible for their citizens. For example, they has closed some factories which contribute too much on the air pollutio and lower the pace of some trade, who are developing on the sacrifice of the environment, such as the chemical engineering companies. On the other hand, they transfer those companies to the developing country, which need the developed country's finiance and they have the larger labor market, so the developed country feel very safe to avoid their environment and they didn't lost the chance to make profit from the profitful industries.Howerer, the bad effect will eventually thread all the countries's safe. The global warm has not specificly occured on some developing countried, but do harm to all the countries. In addition, the desertation effect is an improtant and destructive environment problem. At first glance, it is not an global environment crisis, but an area problem. but on the long run, it is also very harmful to all the creature on the earth. To conclude, I think the enviroment problem is a issue which need all the countries's concern and effective action. no one country can be escaped from the bad effect if we don't take some action to


Score: 4
Explanation of Score:
A 4 paper presents a competent critique of the argument and conveys meaning adequately.

A typical paper in this category

-- identifies and analyzes important features of the argument
-- develops and organizes ideas satisfactorily but may not connect them with transitions
-- supports the main points of the critique
-- demonstrates sufficient control of language to express ideas with reasonable clarity
-- generally demonstrates control of the conventions of standard written English but may have some errors
Topic:
A recent survey of dental patients showed that people who use Smile-Bright toothpaste are most likely to have capped teeth---artificial but natural-looking protective coverings placed by dentists on individual teeth. Those people who had begun using Smile-Bright toothpaste early in life were more likely to have capped teeth than were people who had begun using Smile-Bright later in life. In addition, those who reported brushing their teeth more than twice a day with Smile-Bright toothpaste were more likely to have caps on their teeth than were those who reported brushing with Smile-Bright less frequently. Therefore, people wishing to avoid having their teeth capped should not use Smile-Bright toothpaste.

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument.
Your Answer:
In the argument, the author draw the conclusion that people should use Smile-Bright toophpaste(SB) to avoid having their teeth capped. To support the conclusion, the author showed a recent survey of dental patients. In addition, the author pointed out those people who use SB earlier or more than twice a day were respectively more likely to have caps than those who use SB later or less frequently.The arguing is appealing at first glance. However, the author committed several fallicies, which make the argument weak and also make the conclusion unconvincing. At first place, the argument is based on a survey of dental patients. but the author didn't provide any information about the survey except for the survey's conclusion. Did the survey have enough samples? Who were the patients? Were they be chosen from a specific hospistal? If the survey just took 10 people as objestive, or the patient in question were from the same state, then the servey's conclusion is very doubtful, for too small sample didn't make sense, and if they were lived nearly,it is quite possibly there are other reasons causing the capped teeth, like the similar food structure and the same living habit. So the author must provide more information to make the survey supportive. Moreover, the author pointed out that those people who use SB earlier or more than twice a day were respectively more likely to have caps than those who use SB later or less frequently. The author didn't tell us the information's source and we can't tell whether such information is reliable. And more importantly, the author didn't false comparision. The author wants to support his conclusion, he or she should make comparision between those who use SB with those who are not the consumer of SB. If there are data and analysis show that the latter do have the lowered risk of having the capped teeth. Then the reasoning is reasonable. Howerer, the author make the comparision with the consumers of SB. Then the conslusion is not well supported. The third fallacy the author committed is wrong assumption. To sum up, the author should provide more information about the survey's detail to better support the conclusion. Moreover, the author should correct the analogy to make better reasoning.
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