Issue12, Welcome to evaluate my 6th issue and you are appreciated.
12. People‘s attitudes are determined more by their immediate situation or surroundings than by any internal characteristic.There is a general discussion about the issue that it is more by their immediate situation or surroundings than by any internal characteristic that people determine their attitudes. At first glance, it seems quite reasonable and is widely accepted by most people due to their diversities of own experience, but my opinion is opposite to it after a calm consideration of further analysis and citing several examples to the point.
In Philosophy angle, what promotes the generation and development of one thing consists of two factors. One is internal factor which plays a decisive role, and of course, the other is external factor which also has a certain enfluence on the mainstream of the things during particular period. When it comes to a concrete person armed with the mature thoughts, fledged ideas and ripe value evaluation code, the attitude which he or she would exhibit in face of a vital incident is undoubtedly determined by both the immediate situation and surroundings and the interal characteristic. And in most cases the interal characteristic rather than immediate situation is predominant due to the nature of the human being that would be use to the anylysis, deduction and determination, not like the animals which is lack of profound thought and reasonable judgement when facing the problems, or at most express some instinctive response at the precipitate stress.
A case in point is the famous film, "shawshank redemption". The hero was wrongly sentenced to life immurement for the murdering of his wife and her lover. It was on the powerful and mightily spirit support of his strong belief of absoluted innocence and craving new hopeful and free life that he took as long as twenty years to dredge a tunnel with a 6.7 inch long hummer every night on end. At last he escape from the prison and punished the wardenry by publicizing his proof of crime. Althoug the situation and surroundings are terrifically disadvantageous and greatly difficult for the hero at the point, but his intreal characteristic of perseverance and never stop made him focus and not succumb and eventually saved himself. On the contrary, if the hero gave up easily facing the ceaseless menace and the continuous persecution from the wardenry he should definitely live the rest of life in the prison till end and mostly probably die before long.
what is worth mentioning is that the immediate situation and surroundings do play a role of derterminatio one's attitude to certain extent. And sometimes it could lead to the redirection and reorientation of the development of the attitude. For example, a poor guy without ability and patience to work hard and earning just little money would perhaps change his original kind mind of obeying the laws and unfortunately become a theif, especial being induced and abeted by other malefactors. At the same time, a rich man indulging himself in luxury life and dropping his thrive enterprise would fell down out of question and loose all things he owns at first.
In summary, both the immediate situation or surroundings and the interal characteristic influence the people's attitudes. The former can, owing to some specific cases, change their own original point of views on things while the latter mostly in derterming their last behaviors. So it is important to insist the originally kind, proper and reasonable attitudes by using your thought, wite and judgement when facing the situation which would lead you to committing an err. 12. People‘s attitudes are determined more by their immediate situation or surroundings than by any internal characteristic.
There is a general discussion about the issue that it is more by their immediate situation or surroundings than by any internal characteristic that(改成when比较好) people determine their attitudes. At first glance, it seems quite reasonable and is widely accepted by most people due to their diversities of own experience, but my opinion is opposite to it after a calm consideration of further analysis and citing （citing这个词感觉不好）several examples to the point.
In Philosophy angle, what promotes the generation and development of one thing consists of two factors. One is internal factor which plays a decisive role, and of course, the other is external factor which also has a certain enfluence（拼写错误influence） on the mainstream of the things during particular period. When it comes to a concrete person armed with the mature thoughts, fledged ideas and ripe value evaluation code（code在这里好象不太合适）, the attitude which he or she would exhibit in face of a vital incident is undoubtedly determined by both the immediate situation and surroundings and the interal （拼写错，internal）characteristic. And in most cases the interal （拼写错，internal）characteristic rather than immediate situation is predominant due to the nature of the human being that（that的先行词是哪个，好象离的远了点） would be use to the anylysis （拼写错）, deduction and determination, not like the animals which is lack of profound thought and reasonable judgement （拼写错）when facing the problems, or at most express some instinctive response at the precipitate stress.
A case in point is the famous film, "shawshank redemption". The hero was wrongly sentenced to life immurement for the murdering of his wife and her lover. It was on the powerful and mightily spirit support of his strong belief of absoluted innocence and craving new hopeful and free life that he took as long as twenty years to dredge a tunnel with a 6.7 inch long hummer （蜂鸟？又拼错了） every night on end（on end这里是啥意思？）. At last he escape from the prison and punished the wardenry by publicizing his proof of crime. Althoug （拼写错）the situation and surroundings are terrifically disadvantageous and greatly difficult for the hero at the point, but his intreal （拼写错） characteristic of perseverance and never stop made him focus （focus？看不明白） and not succumb and eventually saved himself. On the contrary, if the hero gave up easily facing the ceaseless menace and the continuous persecution from the wardenry he should definitely live the rest of life in the prison till end and mostly （应该用most吧） probably die before long.
what is worth mentioning is that the immediate situation and surroundings do play a role of derterminatio （拼写错） one's attitude to certain extent. And sometimes it could lead to the redirection and reorientation of the development of the attitude. For example, a poor guy without ability and patience to work hard and earning just little money would perhaps change his original kind mind of obeying the laws and unfortunately become a thief （拼写错）, especial being induced and abeted by other malefactors. At the same time, a rich man indulging himself in luxury life and dropping his thrive enterprise would fell down out of question and loose （好象多打了一个o） all things he owns at first.
In summary, both the immediate situation or surroundings and the interal characteristic influence the people's attitudes. The former can, owing to some specific cases, change their own original point of views on things while the latter mostly in derterming their last behaviors. So it is important to insist the originally kind, proper and reasonable attitudes by using your thought, wite （拼写错） and judgement （拼写错）when facing the situation which would lead you to committing an err.
总的来说有些长句读起来不是很顺，拼写错误多了些。优点是用词还比较丰富，例子举的也还可以。不过电影的那个例子可能不如找一个实际生活的例子更有力。因为人们完全可以说那样的情节只有在电影里才会出现！还有就是论点是在最后一段提出的，第一段只是表明立场，没说观点，窃以为观点放在第一段比较好！
我也是新手，ISSUE只看过范文，还没写过。如果有什么不对的多指正！
thank you for evaluation.
Hi the above student:First, I would like t to appreicate you for carefully reading and commenting my issue. Because now I am busying with my final examinations as others, and I feel it is difficult for me to compose a essay every day, I upload this essay wrote a month ago when I first started practising writing.
Second, I agree with your reasonable suggestion and kind advise. The spelling mistakes is thronged in my essay. And the syntax does not read soomth too. The most valuable criticism you give to me is that I have to present my view point at the first paragraph, rather than the standing merely. You are very wise to tell me that, I make sure to follow this rule in the future.
Third, I would like to give you a nexplanation for " that(改成when比较好) ", 我用的强调句式。
. tianjin的偶喜欢，过一阵我就要回天津了，然后在北京考试。到时多联系！
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