jackygauss 发表于 2004-3-21 15:41:29

Issue51 机警题,限时,590字,8天了啊!

共用时间:45分2秒     590 words
从2004年2月21日14时34分到2004年2月21日15时45分
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Issue51. Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student.
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Since ancient times, education has been exerting its indispensable function in teaching millions of people and guiding them to pursue the splendid future. How to attain a truly effective education has been discussed for a long time. In this issue, the speaker claims that a truly effective education is obtained only by making the education specifically designed to meet every individual's needs and interests. Obviously, this is such an absolute and dubious attitude that I cannot stand on his or her side.

What is a truly effective education? This is a term that we need to define it. A truly effective education is one that uses the least resources and energy to produce the most powerful and useful outcomes. In a truly effective education, most of the students would acquire what they want and go on to step into a higher standard in which they play a role in stimulating the progress of our society. Then why is the speaker wrong in claiming his or her statement?

To begin with, the speaker apparently omits the fact that most students share a large variety of same things in common. Almost all students can learn better during the course of studying and discussing together. Most students become more and more mature and insightful through the education. Many students share the same interests and needs on subjects to learn. All these matters help to demonstrate that the conventional education, which does not consider meeting the individual needs and interests of each student, can meet most students' needs and interests by using a relatively smaller amount of costs. In fact, most of the world's outstanding persons such as Winston Churchill, Archimedes were basking in the education of this conventional kind. They do not have the special attention of the tutor to meet their special needs or interests. However, they have the ability to search what they need and benefit from this kind of education.  

On the other hand, even if we admit, and we have to, that almost all students have their special inclinations, dispositions, interests and needs, can we thus draw the conclusion that we must design specifically to meet their different needs and further aver that only by doing this can education become truly effective? Certainly not! Actually the fact is just on the opposite side. Imagine a case in which we try our best effort to modify our education system to make it specifically designed to meet each person's special needs and interests. What we would only get is an entire disorder and chaos. When we try to meet every person's needs we just cannot meet each person's because the resources are scarce. We do not have enough faculty and devices or equipments to fill every student's needs. In this manner, this kind of education become a truly ineffective one instead of a truly effective one because most students cannot get their needs for the sake of our intention to meet every single person's needs.

Admittedly, what I want to present is not that paying special attention to each single student's needs and interests is absolutely harmful or useless. One person can surely become more advanced by the help of this "attention". But to meet every person's needs is just impossible to achieve.

In conclusion, education may be very likely to become ineffective instead of when it is specially designed to meet each individual' needs for both practical and theoretical reasons. A truly effective education may be one that meets most students' common and necessary needs and interests while in the same time frees the students to search and pursue their special needs and provides support to them.

jackygauss 发表于 2004-3-21 17:38:19

不好意思,顶一下。:)

吭哧吭哧啃啃 发表于 2004-3-21 18:17:20

Issue51. Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student.
------正文------
Since ancient times, education has been exerting its indispensable function in teaching millions of people and guiding them to pursue the splendid future. How to attain a truly effective education has been discussed for a long time. In this issue, the speaker claims that a truly effective education is obtained only by making the education specifically designed to meet every individual's needs and interests. Obviously, this is such an absolute and dubious attitude that I cannot stand on his or her side.你的EFFECTIVE education  很独特,支持

What is a truly effective education? This is a term that we need to define it. A truly effective education is one that uses the least resources and energy to produce the most powerful and useful outcomes. In a truly effective education, most of the students would acquire what they want and go on to step into a higher standard in which they play a role in stimulating the progress of our society. Then why is the speaker wrong in claiming his or her statement?(这一句如果是我,我会放下一段说,英文中好像这种承上启下的不太受欢迎,个人意见)

To begin with, the speaker apparently omits the fact that most students share a large variety of same things in common. Almost all students can learn better during the course of studying and discussing together. Most students become more and more mature and insightful through the education. Many students share the same interests and needs on subjects to learn. All these matters help to demonstrate that the conventional education, which does not consider meeting the individual needs and interests of each student, can meet most students' needs and interests by using a relatively smaller amount of costs. In fact, most of the world's outstanding persons such as Winston Churchill, Archimedes were basking in the education of this conventional kind. They do not have the special attention of the tutor to meet their special needs or interests. However, they have the ability to search what they need and benefit from this kind of education.

On the other hand, even if we admit, and we have to, that almost all students have their special inclinations, dispositions, interests and needs, can we thus draw the conclusion that we must design specifically to meet their different needs and further aver that only by doing this can education become truly effective? Certainly not! Actually the fact is just on the opposite side. Imagine a case in which we try our best effort to modify our education system to make it specifically designed to meet each person's special needs and interests. What we would only get is an entire disorder and chaos. When we try to meet every person's needs we just cannot meet each person's because the resources are scarce. (这一句有点问题,it is impossible ----可以考虑换换,总是WE开头) We do not have enough faculty and devices or equipments to fill every student's needs (fill needs有无这一说阿). In this manner, this kind of education become(s) a truly ineffective one instead of a truly effective one because most students cannot get their needs for the sake of our intention to meet every single person's needs.

Admittedly, what I want to present is not that paying special attention to each single student's needs and interests is absolutely harmful or useless. One person can surely become more advanced by the help of this "attention". But to meet every person's needs is just impossible to achieve.让步的好

In conclusion, education may be very likely to become ineffective instead of when it is specially designed to meet each individual' needs for both practical and theoretical reasons. A truly effective education may be one that meets most students' common and necessary needs and interests while in the same time frees the students to search and pursue their special needs and provides support to them.
思维独特,整体的段落很清晰,少有语法错误,还能写那么多字,佩服 ,我现在还只能写400字,老兄有何高招

cale 发表于 2004-3-21 18:51:55

Issue51. Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student.

Since ancient times, education has been exerting its indispensable function in teaching millions of people and guiding them to pursue the splendid future. How to attain a truly effective education has been discussed for a long time. In this issue, the speaker claims that a truly effective education is obtained only by making the education specifically designed to meet every individual's needs and interests. Obviously, this is such an absolute and dubious attitude that I cannot stand on his or her side.

What is a truly effective education? This is a term that we need to define it. A truly effective education is one that uses the least resources and energy to produce the most powerful and useful outcomes(这和教育有什么关系,怎么也得带上education吧). In a truly effective education, most of the students would acquire what they want and go on to step into a higher standard in which they play a role in stimulating(用promote会不会好一点) the progress of our society. Then why is the speaker wrong in claiming his or her statement?(in his claim or statement就可以了吧)

To begin with, the speaker apparently omits the fact that most students share a large variety of same things in common(我觉得same in common 这两个意思重复). Almost all students can learn better during the course of studying and discussing together. Most students become more and more mature and insightful through the education. Many students share the same interests and needs on subjects to learn. All these matters help to demonstrate that the conventional education, which does not consider meeting the individual needs and interests of each student(does not consider satisfying the particular needs and interests of individual student,个人意见 ), can meet most students' needs and interests by using a relatively smaller amount of costs. In fact, most of the world's outstanding persons(people) such as Winston Churchill, Archimedes were basking in the education of this conventional kind. They do not have the special attention of the tutor to meet their special needs or interests. However, they have the ability to search what they need and benefit from this kind of education. 我觉得举例要扣住你的主题句。

On the other hand, even if we admit, and we have to(have to 后面可不能直接加从句,admit可以,所以这么并列我觉得有问题), that almost all students have their special inclinations, dispositions, interests and needs(两个就行了吧,给人一种凑字的感觉), can we thus draw the conclusion that we must design specifically(design what?vt) to meet their different needs and further aver that only by doing this can education become truly effective? Certainly not! Actually the fact is just on the opposite side. Imagine a case in which we try our best effort to modify our education system to make it specifically designed to meet each person's special needs and interests. What we would only(放到is后面) get is an entire disorder and chaos. When we try to meet every person's needs we just cannot meet each person's because the resources are scarce(强调有限,用limited). We do not have enough faculty and devices or equipments to fill(填?fulfill) every student's needs. In this manner, this kind of education become a truly ineffective one instead of a truly effective one because most students cannot get their needs(加一个unsatisfied) for the sake of our intention to meet every single person's needs.

Admittedly, what I want to present is not that paying special attention to each single student's needs and interests is absolutely harmful or useless. One person can surely become more advanced by the help of this "attention"(跟前面的论证矛盾了). But to meet every person's needs is just impossible to achieve.

In conclusion, education may be very likely to become ineffective instead of (加一个effective) when it is specially designed to meet each individual' needs for both practical and theoretical reasons. A truly effective education may be one that meets most students' common and necessary needs and interests while in the same time frees the students to search and pursue their special needs and provides support to them.

nairsag 发表于 2004-3-21 20:12:24

我觉得你的例子很空洞。找点真实的例子比较好
。个人见解。

jackygauss 发表于 2004-3-22 12:58:31

多谢你们的批改和建议!我会再仔细研究一下的。还有一周,按现在写的速度,一天一篇issue,不知道会有多大帮助。碰到有思路的还好,没思路的什么都写不出了!GOD BLESS US!真希望碰到有话可说的题目啊!

绞尽脑汁 发表于 2004-3-22 13:45:18

呵呵,有点argument的味道
第四段,What we would only get is an entire disorder and chaos. 为什么会这样?总不会简单的一个imagine就出这么一结果吧?再深入写一下(个人意见)

jackygauss 发表于 2004-3-22 14:08:11

恩,对!我可以把这句话放到段落的后面再说,前面多深入分析一下,这样才水到渠成。谢谢!

吭哧吭哧啃啃 发表于 2004-3-22 14:56:46

:rolleyes: 碰到有思路的还好,没思路的什么都写不出了!GOD BLESS US!真希望碰到有话可说的题目啊!

会的,加油
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