Some famous athletes and entertainers earn millions of dollars every year. Do you think these people deserve such high salaries? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion
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0A"lD MR4DNowadays, there are so many occupations in our society, but the incomes of those people who pursue in different jobs have diverse salaries. Such as the topic presented in title, whether it is fair for athletes and entertainers having high earnings? I think it is absolutely reasonable and these people should get that compensations for their efforts and cost.bbs.gter.net6O'N        KHl

+lu;EWV5iQ4y@留学,考试,TOEFL,GRE,GMAT,IELTS,SAT,VISA,文书,签证,论坛,出国,申请,美国,英国,欧洲,加拿大,USAFirst of all, these athletes and entertainers pay much more of their time and labor in activities which will improve their specific skills than other people, even if it is necessary to them when they chose to work on those areas. Take dancers for example, in order to making beautiful and standard poses to audiences in dance shows, they must exercise every day from morning to deep night so that they can keep different parts of their bodies flexible. They cost so much time and labor on them. Moreover, athletes also shape their bodies hardly. For instance, runners can’t be off from their exercises even one day because they must pay all their attention on sports which related to raise their speed of running. Many coaches of runners frequently say that one day's leisure may let an excellent runner become a loser in competition. In conclusion, their time and labor should be paid by high income.
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RkF/B-h-M&p寄托家园Secondly, it is so dangerous and boring for them. Athletes undergo high possibility of hurt of their bodies and almost every athlete experiences painful time when his body was hurt, such as head blooding, leg fracture, hand breaking and so on. At the same time, facing playground all day long are bitter lives to many athletes no to mention there are only a few athletes can win in their contests. Entertainers have ever stayed in the same conditions, just as we said, dangerous of hurt and boring of repeating same poses, before they are well-known and can make 10 thousand dollars only one performance. Thus, their earnings were obtained through encountering dangers and persisting in boring.8Mw2`.z,TH$\l

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B        T7mJ留学,考试,TOEFL,GRE,GMAT,IELTS,SAT,VISA,文书,签证,论坛,出国,申请,美国,英国,欧洲,加拿大,USA bbs.gter.netg_0c
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The last but not the least, we can see there are so many people have decent wage incomes if he or she work toughly on their occupations. The reason why athletes and entertainers can attain such high incomes is that they cost much more things on their jobs than other people. Most of people who have low incomes definitely have much leisure time and their works need less labor, like teachers in high schools and elementary schools, their works are in rule and only working five eight-hour days one week, at the same time they have vacations in summer and fall semesters. Moreover, for instance, doctors have decent incomes than common workers, however, it is so less than athletes and entertainers. We can find the reasons from doctors' working schedules. Doctors have regular working time, too. They have many chances to communicate with patients; therefore, they are not dull. Thus we can know athletes and entertainers earn much money because their jobs are unlike other workers'.
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[/cSbkW2I`bbs.gter.netWe can conclude that athletes and entertainers engage in different jobs than other people. They should get that much money because they pay too much in their daily lives. If one person can strive as more as athletes and entertainers, they could earn much money, too. Therefore, I strongly support the opinion that athletes and entertainers’ high incomes are suitable.

Whether is it reasonable for famous athletes and entertainers to receive millions of dollars every year? As far as I am concerned, most of those famous athletes and entertainers deserve such high salaries owing to their costs; on the other hand some of them do not.?o)m:v6_,p(DR_
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`留学,考试,TOEFL,GRE,GMAT,IELTS,SAT,VISA,文书,签证,论坛,出国,申请,美国,英国,欧洲,加拿大,USAFirst of all, the majorities of the famous athletes and entertainers have to pay much more efforts and time to their occupations than other people before they became famous. Without consistent perseverance and lots of sweat, most of them could not have succeeded. For example, those athletes who want to gain championship must train day after day and year after year. Only through several or even more years, they can obtain the chance to take part in big competitions and defeat the opponents. As for the entertainers, it is also necessary for them to train the skills of performance and other special abilities. Take dancers for examples, in order to present standard and elegant poses on stages, they must practice again and again until they can perform it perfectly. According to the market's rule on “costs make profits”, their costs deserve the profits.|留学|签证|TOEFL|GRExW3@6rMf
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Secondly, the dangerous property of some sports entertainment activities makes it a risk for athletes and entertainers to be engaged in them. During the courses of exercises and competitions, it is easy for them to suffer damages, like fractures, muscle strains and other hurts. These damages sometimes even endanger their occupation lives or their life-span. Just as the saying goes: the more dangerous, the more income, those athletes and entertainers who have ventured upon the athletic sports and entertainments should be paid back with high wages.
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;c'Q6{1Fq%?;Xs3_d!JThirdly, the glories and pleasure brought by those celebrities are invaluable which cannot be measured by money. The success of famous athletes not only gives honors to themselves but also to their own countries even to the human being. These intangible achievements are too significant to evaluate by any materialized (corporeal) ways. For instance, Liu xiang, a Chinese runner, who once transcended the world record of 110 meters, has already built personal legend and also that of his homeland. At the same time the relaxations and amusements profiting from entertainers are also difficult to be weighed. Therefore, they are worthy of such high salaries, to some degree, their values are much more over the incomes.    |留学|签证|TOEFL|GREh3yZ!w9pu ~        z

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D)~:GX9g5`W%L9Q!?留学,考试,TOEFL,GRE,GMAT,IELTS,SAT,VISA,文书,签证,论坛,出国,申请,美国,英国,欧洲,加拿大,USAOf course, the successes of a few celebrities are occasional without great efforts and longtime experiences. For instance, some of them depend on good luck; some make use of their appearances; some even are blinded by gain and utilize illegal manners. For those persons, it is unfair to receive such high salaries. E6d.U+n$AJ-b
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In conclusion, most of the famous celebrities deserve the hard-earned high salaries attributing to their arduous work, hazardous profession and invaluable accomplishment, while some celebrities in the minority whose prosperities come from other irregular factors are unworthy of the reputation and return.
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n{'L*I-IDe,lBbbs.gter.net[ 本帖最后由 liuxiaopang 于 2008-6-24 01:01 编辑 ]

两位真积极＾＾等着看修改。bbs.gter.net'qN5|!VF8w

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y$M寄托家园提醒一下，不要重复题目原文，充字数太明显，直接的扣分点。

Nowadays, there are so many (numerous, various, variety) occupations in our society, but the incomes of those people who pursue in different jobs have diverse salaries. Such as the topic presented in title, whether it is fair for athletes and entertainers having high earnings? I think it is absolutely reasonable and these people should get that compensations for their efforts and cost..ce.cnS0Dn8@$gA&T |'cFirst of all, these athletes and entertainers pay much more of their time and labor in activities which will improve their specific skills than other people, even if这个连词有点不通 it is necessary to them 删掉when they chose to work on those areas. Take dancers for example, in order to making beautiful and standard poses to audiences in dance shows, they must exercise every day from morning to deep night so that they can keep different parts of their bodies flexible. They cost 用spend更好一些so much time and labor on them. Moreover, athletes also shape their bodies hardly. For instance, runners can’t(建议不用简写) be off from their exercises even one day because they must pay all their attention on sports which related to raise their speed of running. Many coaches of runners frequently say that one day's leisure may let an excellent runner become a loser in competition. In conclusion, their time and labor（industrious efforts用两遍了，可以换个说法）  should be paid by high income.|留学|签证|TOEFL|GRE"M
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9eSecondly, it is so dangerous and boring for them.(As athletes or entertainments, their work is extremely boring and dangerous觉得在段首用代词them不太好) Athletes undergo high possibility of hurt of their bodies and almost every athlete experiences painful time when his body was hurt, such as head blooding, leg fracture, hand breaking and so on. At the same time, facing playground all day long are bitter lives to many athletes no to mention there are only a few athletes can win in their contests. Entertainers have ever stayed in the same conditions, just as we said, dangerous of hurt and boring of repeating same poses, before they are well-known and can make 10 thousand dollars only one performance. Thus, their earnings were obtained through encountering dangers and persisting in boring.9p        I
        i#JL5w}Ciwcl[1][C9eM1Y#c0v,d6S/EFThe last but not the least, we can see there are so many people have decent wage incomes if he or she work toughly on their occupations. The reason why athletes and entertainers can attain such high incomes is that they cost much more things on their jobs than other people. Most of people who have low incomes definitely have much leisure time and their works need less labor, like teachers in high schools and elementary schools, their works are in rule and only working five eight-hour days one week, at the same time they have vacations in summer and fall semesters. Moreover, for instance, doctors have decent incomes than common workers, however, it is so less than athletes and entertainers. We can find the reasons from doctors' working schedules. Doctors have regular working time, too. They have many chances to communicate with patients; therefore, they(the routine of them) are not dull. Thus we can know athletes and entertainers earn much money because their jobs are unlike other workers'.bbs.gter.ce.cnN        i6t+im#C
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w|留学|签证|TOEFL|GRE[ 本帖最后由 ludywuyd 于 2008-6-24 09:30 编辑 ]

发现了，都比我水平高，我还是最先考的呢。
u0XJC@,`不过我会尽力去改的，从你们的鸡蛋里挑骨头。寄托家园)Km;L/|]"HsFj
还有，我半小时只能写300字，你们这是多长时间写完的？

Some famous athletes and entertainers earn millions of dollars every year. Do you think these people deserve such high salaries? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion寄托家
R_jx[K}寄托家园

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}8Zci7kqr|留学|签证|TOEFL|GRENowadays, there are so many occupations in our society, but the incomes of those people who pursue in different jobs have diverse salaries. Such as the topic presented in title, whether it is fair for athletes and entertainers having high earnings? I think it is absolutely reasonable and these people should get that compensations for their efforts and cost [cost感觉用在这里怪，去掉].*yR6F$hfp3c|留学|签证|TOEFL|GRE0U
1_WTl#d*uv!m|Q留学,考试,TOEFL,GRE,GMAT,IELTS,SAT,VISA,文书,签证,论坛,出国,申请,美国,英国,欧洲,加拿大,USAR;ll+y2|~(a6mFirst of all, these athletes and entertainers pay much more of their time and labor in activities which will improve their specific skills than other people, even if [though，让步，不是假设] it is necessary to them when they chose to work on those areas. Take dancers for example, in order to making [make] beautiful and standard poses to audiences in dance shows [in dance shows 去掉或改为on the stage], they must exercise every day from morning to deep night so that they can keep different parts of their bodies flexible. They cost so much time and labor on them. Moreover, athletes also shape their bodies hardly. [As well, athletes also need to practice hardly and constantly.] For instance, runners can’t be off from their exercises even one day because they must pay all their attention on sports which related to raise their speed of running. Many coaches of runners frequently say that [even one day leisure] may let an excellent runner become a loser in competition. In conclusion, their time and labor should be paid by high income. [不应该是should，their time and labor is paid for high income.].gter.net;]o5cHZ`\(jN
\eW*U"FHSecondly, it is so dangerous and boring for them. [去掉so] Athletes undergo high possibility of hurt of their bodies [改一个词injuries，比较简洁] and almost every athlete experiences painful time when his body was hurt,[去掉when his body was hurt, 改冒号或者破折，去掉后面的such as] such as head blooding, leg fracture, hand breaking and so on. At [In?不确定] the same time, facing playground all day long are bitter lives to many athletes no to mention there are only a few athletes can win in their contests. Entertainers have ever stayed in the same conditions, just as we said [mentioned], dangerous of hurt and boring of repeating same poses, before they are well-known and can make 10 thousand dollars only one performance. Thus, their earnings were obtained through encountering dangers and persisting in boring.寄托家园A*w P4m8U:EWO
g#AG-gK5S6E留学,考试,TOEFL,GRE,GMAT,IELTS,SAT,VISA,文书,签证,论坛,出国,申请,美国,英国,欧洲,加拿大,USAvThe last but not the least, we can see there are so many people have decent wage incomes if he or she work toughly on their occupations. The reason why athletes and entertainers can attain such high incomes is that they cost much more things [things去掉] on their jobs than other people. Most of people who have low incomes definitely [definitely去掉，太绝对了] have much leisure time and their works need less labor, like teachers in high schools and elementary schools, their works are in rule and only working five eight-hour days one week, at the same time they have vacations in summer and fall semesters. Moreover, for instance, doctors have decent incomes than common workers, however, it is so less than athletes and entertainers. We can find the reasons from doctors' working schedules. Doctors have regular working time, too. They have many chances to communicate with patients; therefore, they are not dull. Thus we can know athletes and entertainers earn much money because their jobs are unlike other workers'.这一段关于doctors我有点疑问，因为doctors是高收入阶层，好多应该也可以有million dollar a year。bbs.gter.netG[g[        Ow
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V+r/m)p,\4gWe can conclude that athletes and entertainers engage in different jobs than other people. [这句没看懂] They should get that much money because they pay too much in their daily lives. If one person can strive as more as athletes and entertainers, they could earn much money, too. Therefore, I strongly support the opinion that athletes and entertainers’ high incomes are suitable.

LZ可不可以帮我改改啊，第一篇小作，很期待修改呀
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Nowadays, there are so many occupations in our society, but the incomes of those people who pursue in different jobs have diverse salaries. Such as the topic presented in title, whether it is fair for athletes and entertainers having high earnings? I think it is absolutely reasonable and these people should get that compensations for their efforts and cost.

@{6dpgj留学,考试,TOEFL,GRE,GMAT,IELTS,SAT,VISA,文书,签证,论坛,出国,申请,美国,英国,欧洲,加拿大,USAFirst of all, these athletes and entertainers pay much more of their time and labor in activities which will improve their specific skills than other people, even if it is necessary to them when they chose to work on those areas. Take dancers for example, in order to making beautiful and standard poses to audiences in dance shows, they must exercise every day from morning to deep night so that they can keep different parts of their bodies flexible. They cost so much time and labor on them. Moreover, athletes also shape their bodies hardly. For instance, runners can’t be off from their exercises even one day because they must pay all their attention on sports which related to raise their speed of running. Many coaches of runners frequently say that one day's leisure may let an excellent runner become a loser in competition. In conclusion, their time and labor should be paid by high income.
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t|留学|签证|TOEFL|GRESecondly, it is so dangerous and boring for them. (What is dangerous and boring for them? What is the main idea of this paragraph?) Athletes undergo high possibility of hurt of their bodies and almost every athlete experiences painful time when his body was hurt, such as head blooding, leg fracture, hand breaking and so on. At the same time, facing playground all day long are (is) bitter lives to many athletes no to mention there are only a few athletes can win in their contests. Entertainers have ever stayed in the same conditions, just as we said, dangerous of hurt and boring of repeating same poses, before they are well-known and can make 10 thousand dollars only one performance. Thus, their earnings were obtained through encountering dangers and persisting in boring.
MZ3iXYThe last but not the least, we can see there are so many people have decent wage incomes if he or she work toughly on their occupations. The reason why athletes and entertainers can attain such high incomes is that they cost much more things on their jobs than other people. Most of people who have low incomes definitely have much leisure time and their works need less labor, like teachers in high schools and elementary schools, their works are in rule and only working five eight-hour days one week, at the same time they have vacations in summer and fall semesters. Moreover, for instance, doctors have decent incomes than common workers, however, it is so less than athletes and entertainers. We can find the reasons from doctors' working schedules. Doctors have regular working time, too. They have many chances to communicate with patients; therefore, they are not dull. Thus we can know athletes and entertainers earn much money because their jobs are unlike other workers'.
0{bZi8n9S?e3my'h|留学|签证|TOEFL|GREWe can conclude that athletes and entertainers engage in different jobs than other people. (This conclusion is a little strange.) They should get that much money because they pay too much in their daily lives. If one person can strive as more as athletes and entertainers, they could earn much money, too. Therefore, I strongly support the opinion that athletes and entertainers’ high incomes are suitable.

大家的修改很好，的确发现了不少问题，我感觉自己也有提高。咱们继续加油啊。

liuxiaopang 兄弟，下次别把作文发在我的作业下面了，自己独立主题发帖，然后将链接放在主帖下面，主帖为IMPULSE-----作文小组 。
]p-W.s?Z寄托家园不好意思，可能是我的作业题目产生了歧义，下次不用这个了，用19811010316第几次作业。希望大家继续关注，帮我好好改改啊！！bbs.gter.net)V#w,`G4qqR1um
|留学|签证|TOEFL|GREE#[({@1w8Vs%k
这位兄弟写的挺好的。水平比我高，像你学习。bbs.gter.net&ZYHL:Lz'vRz
留学,考试,TOEFL,GRE,GMAT,IELTS,SAT,VISA,文书,签证,论坛,出国,申请,美国,英国,欧洲,加拿大,USA7BRj/a6U q i
Whether is it reasonable for famous athletes and entertainers to receive millions of dollars every year? As far as I am concerned, most of those famous athletes and entertainers deserve such high salaries owing to their costs; on the other hand some of them do not (开头不好，观点不明确，不能两面倒。).s)}*Ol$R&?
|留学|签证|TOEFL|GREZw\o:EB$Gv
First of all, the majorities of the famous athletes and entertainers have to pay much more efforts and time to their occupations than other people before they became famous. Without consistent perseverance and lots of sweat, most of them could not have succeeded（有succeed的完成是表达吗？好像没见过be successful）. For example, those athletes who want to gain championship must train day after day and year after year. Only through several or even more years, they can obtain the chance to take part in big competitions and defeat the opponents. As for the entertainers, it is also necessary for them to train the skills of performance and other special abilities. Take dancers for examples, in order to present standard and elegant poses on stages, they must practice again and again until they can perform it perfectly. According to the market's rule on “costs make profits”, their costs deserve the profits.留学,考试,TOEFL,GRE,GMAT,IELTS,SAT,VISA,文书,签证,论坛,出国,申请,美国,英国,欧洲,加拿大,USATJf2`fjL
DPS7h6oRE
Secondly, the dangerous property of some sports entertainment activities makes it a risk for athletes and entertainers to be engaged in them. During the courses of exercises and competitions, it is easy for them to suffer damages, like fractures, muscle strains and other hurts. These damages sometimes even endanger their occupation lives or their life-span (life expectancy). Just as the saying goes: the more dangerous, the more income, those athletes and entertainers who have ventured upon the athletic sports and entertainments should be paid back with high wages.&hZ:c1Q'z2k
寄托家园_        S,vE
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Thirdly, the glories and pleasure brought by those celebrities are invaluable which cannot be measured by money. The success of famous athletes not only gives honors to themselves but also to their own countries even to the human being. These intangible achievements are too significant to evaluate by any materialized (corporeal) ways. For instance, Liu xiang, a Chinese runner, who once transcended the world record of 110 meters, has already built personal legend and also that of his homeland. At the same time the relaxations and amusements profiting from entertainers are also difficult to be weighed. Therefore, they are worthy of such high salaries, to some degree, their values are much more over the incomes.    寄托家园J};SUa)w.wP
Of course, the successes of a few celebrities are occasional without great efforts and longtime experiences. For instance, some of them depend on good luck; some make use of their appearances; some even are blinded by gain and utilize illegal manners. For those persons, it is unfair to receive such high salaries (最好是一个观点不要分成两个，很多人都这样说，同时，我上次考试以这个思路写，结果很惨。). B#b5U(i&c8S
留学,考试,TOEFL,GRE,GMAT,IELTS,SAT,VISA,文书,签证,论坛,出国,申请,美国,英国,欧洲,加拿大,USAq'b        dZn-T)d'\6t7b
In conclusion, most of the famous celebrities deserve the hard-earned high salaries attributing to their arduous work, hazardous profession and invaluable accomplishment, while some celebrities in the minority whose prosperities come from other irregular factors are unworthy of the reputation and return.g ^%g)e]"B*b

z.L)M4I^(k3K留学,考试,TOEFL,GRE,GMAT,IELTS,SAT,VISA,文书,签证,论坛,出国,申请,美国,英国,欧洲,加拿大,USA(s3wWR        sNK
[ 本帖最后由 hyacinth 于 2008-6-25 11:16 编辑 ]