[未归类] 韩小夕的作文本~~哎，大家使劲拍…… [复制链接]

xsdgj
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46楼

发表于 2010-8-16 19:57:23 |只看该作者

Nowadays, a recent survey shows that more and more parents intend to teach their children how to show their accomplishments instead of teaching (感觉improving更好) them strengths only. That means, people start to realize how significant it is to exhibit the accomplishments. Some people who object to this saying insist that gold can always shine. Even the influential people or employers don’t know about your strengths, you may still achieve great success in another area. However, I found little evidence to prove this. So, in my personal view, learning good ways to ensure other people know about one’s advantages are necessary, both as a student and an employee.

It is acknowledged that American universities consider student more fairly while dealing with applications. That is because they weigh students according to both their scores and personal state and recommendation from teachers. As a student, you need to show your specific accomplishments and unique advantages to pop out from other applicants. This year, a student who got highest scores in College Entrance Test in China attempted to apply to top American universities. However, he got rejections form all the colleges he applied. This is because the way he was showing himself was ordinary and boring. Listing a bunch of numbers and accolades, he lost the opportunity to reveal a real person. Obtaining ways of exhibiting oneself is crucial for students to acquire the fondness.

Moreover, it is undoubtedly important for employees to ensure that the bosses know about your accomplishments. If employers have no clue about one’s efforts and success, how can they offer one promotion? That is to say, ensuring that your boss is aware of your endeavor and achievements is the key to promotion and further success. My friend Aries was shy when he was first employed as a manager assistant. Working assiduously with his work, he devoted himself to the job. On the contrary, he had no sense of showing off himself a little bit so that employers can see his devotion. After talking with his experience （experienced？？） father, he realized if he couldn’t make his bosses see his devotion and achievements, he would never get a promotion and be successful. So he started show his strengths in a wise way. In the end, he got a quick promotion and achieved great success in work.

I will not draw a definite conclusion that people who are not good that exhibiting their strengths can never get successful. Their efforts, ambitions or achievements may be seen or discovered by their bosses. However, nobody can deny that learning a wise way to let people see your endeavor and achievements is the best way to obtain initial success.

To sum up, in the society, not only the students but also the employees need wise ways to reveal their strengths and accomplishments to attract influential people’s attention such as teachers and bosses. This will be the first step to achieve their success.
第一遍，感觉你的文笔很正，论点也中肯。是篇好文章。
第二篇，发觉你写了近500字。如果你能在考试规定时间内完成的话，得满分对你来说是一件很容易的事。
希望有机会向你多学习学习。

迟了。请见谅！

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梦的弃儿
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47楼

发表于 2010-8-17 22:46:46 |只看该作者

2008.5.16 NA
independently writing: 是telephone 还是television对人类的有more effects
480字
When it comes to the most important invention in this century, telephones and televisions are definitely foremost. However, a recent survey analyzed the statistics and indicated that people intend to determine that televisions have more effects on people’s lives. Some people who object to this saying insist that telephone first provide connection for people in different area or even different country. However, since the televisions can offer communication with more people and consist of both sound and image, I hold that televisions have a greater influence on people.

It is universally acknowledged that television changed people’s lives at night. Instead of going out or to the bed, people can relax themselves on the couch and enjoy the TV shows, movies and news. Compared to telephone, television provides a broader communication with people. Advertisement on TV can be seen by hundreds and thousands of people, while telephone can only get connection with a single person. My mom once said that she cannot live without television. Not just because of the various TV shows that bring her knowledge and joy, but also the basic news that keep her informed about the city, country as well as the world. On the country, living without a telephone seems much easier. If you really need to find somebody, you can step in the show and ask others for help.

Also, televisions consist of both sound and images. It is hard for an ordinary telephone to do so. On the contrary to all kinds of pictures, videos on TV, telephone can only provides sound communication. Just imagine, if you are trying to post advertisement through the phone, it will be really hard to describe the product. What’s more, few people will believe it. There is an old saying”Seeing is believing” How can you trust and pay for something while you have no clue what it looks like. It is more useful for people to have a source through television of all kinds of information. From this, I can easily imagine that people try to sell things through telephones are going to fail.

On the other hand, I will not draw a definitely conclusion that telephone has no efforts on people’s lives. When you are upset, a call with friend can usefully calm you down. When you are blue, a call approaching parents can let you have someone to talk to. Telephone seems important for personal communication. It can neither provide a broader connection with thousands of people nor have pictures, videos or shows.

From all I mentioned above, I deem that television influences people’s lives more than telephone. The living pictures, delicate videos and various programs provided by television and latest information and broader resources through TV programs make television intends to have a greater effect on people’s lives.

对不住同组的同学。我也不知道怎么不能传附件了=。=汗
21号就要考了，小夕有点紧张。。不知怎么的
要不大家给我估个分？

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