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[未归类] 8.16作文，求拍砖 [复制链接]

minnielily
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电梯直达

楼主

发表于 2010-8-16 21:33:30 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

Most businesspeople are motivated only by the desire for more money.(Money)
Some people argues that most businesspeople are motivated only by the desire for more money,while I hold different opinion for couples of reasons as follows.
First, I should admit that there is a minority group of businessmen who drive their staff work hard even overtime without enough paying or cheat consumers with bad commodities，While I insist there are other more important things such as career satisfaction,happiness,friendship etc.that most businesspeople are pursuing.
Like teachers,workers and drivers, some people choose to be a businessman as a job.My uncle used to runs a tourist company in my city . As a boss he worked very hard.He went to continuation school to learn necessary knowledge and skills to manage his company well . He enjoyed to work with other company staff,besides he donated lots of money to local schools and other public sevices.He earned not only money but also reputations and satisfaction.
Happiness is another motivation that drive businessmen to make money.Happiness is the eternal thing we human being take every effort to achieve. Many businessmen spend their money offering their parents comfortable life plus affording expensive tuitions for their children’s education. They are misunderstood to be motivated only by desire of money,but actually they earn money desperately to supply the whole family a happy life.
Moreover, businessmen usually make many friends from different fields.As an old saying goes that there must be a mentor for me among any three people.Many businessmen enjoy widening their minds through communicating with their friends.
Besides there always some generous businessmen who always afford lots of job opportunities to our society without little pay back.
In conclusion,most businessmen pursue career satisfaction,happiness,friendship through their hard work instead of motivated only by the desire of more money.

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longxue26
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沙发

发表于 2010-8-17 12:36:44 |只看该作者

本帖最后由 longxue26 于 2010-8-17 12:38 编辑

你敢给我来个带附件的不? <东北话哈>

God Bless me!
我想我可以的!是一定可以的!是一定一定不错的!

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longxue26
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板凳

发表于 2010-8-17 13:02:18 |只看该作者

搞定了

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God Bless me!
我想我可以的!是一定可以的!是一定一定不错的!

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rstech
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地板

发表于 2010-8-17 13:11:53 |只看该作者

给改了一下，仅供参考，我自己都懒的写作文了。

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PhD, Geog/RS, Fall 2011
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minnielily
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5楼

发表于 2010-8-17 13:23:22 |只看该作者

4# rstech
谢谢！继续努力中ing~~

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rstech
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6楼

发表于 2010-8-17 13:59:38 |只看该作者

5# minnielily
cheat consumers
with bad commodities 没错，跟动名词时一般用by。

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louisa427
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7楼

发表于 2010-8-17 20:03:05 |只看该作者

MM写的不错，就是有点小错误要改一下，第一段，我觉得最后的as follows是不是应该改成as following？最后一段:there is an old saying goes like that....

还有，我发现你每一段的点题点基本上都在最后一句，我觉得可以提到第一句来，最后再稍微总结下，这样大家要看到每一段的结尾才知道你这段的中心思想是什么。

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minnielily
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8楼

发表于 2010-8-17 21:43:47 |只看该作者

7# louisa427
谢谢！！

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minnielily
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9楼

发表于 2010-8-17 21:54:08 |只看该作者

Students who can keep their own rooms organized are more likely to succeed.

Some people said that students who can keep their own rooms organized are more likely to succeed,I admit that being organized may be a factor that help one to succeed,but it is not necessary for one’s success.There are other crucial factors leading people to succeed.
The most primary one is a specific aim.There is no direction to success without a specific aim.Take the former prime minister Mr. Zhou Enlai for example,when he was 12,the school headmaster asked him what he studied for,he said I studied for the prosperity and development of our nation.To achieve this aim,he studied very hard and devoted his whole life to our country’s construction.There is no doubt that it is Mr.Zhou’s great dream and specific aim make him a successful man.
Secondly,willpower is another significant factor a succeed person should have.As an old saying goes,failure teaches success.Most successful people have strong willpower to over come difficulties they have to confront.Zhang Haidi was paralysed from the chest when she was only five,as soon as she realized that she might soon leave this world,she determined to do more useful things for others during the limited time of her rest life.Her strong willpower enabled her to conquer a lot of difficulties,she wrote several books and translate a famous long novel.
Moreover, in order to succeed, a person must keep learning knowledge and developing different skills.Keep learning makes a man standing in the edge of the advanced science and technology which ensured him/her never fall behind others.Besides,cooperate with others is also important for one to succeed because one cannot do everything without help.Through history, every successful person have a team of friends or coworkers that always support him/her.
In conclusion,the condition of success is various.Keeping rooms tidy and clean may also be a factor for one’s success.There are more important things for people to achieve success.

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