[考场] GRE作文批改，求大神！感激涕零！！！ [复制链接]

朔夕茂
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发表于 2015-7-7 09:22:08 |显示全部楼层

  作文时间：50min，本人的第一篇作文。。。。。
  Some people believe that in order to be effective, political leaders must yield to public opinion and abandon principle for the sake of compromise. Others believe that the most essential quality of an effective leader is the ability to remain consistently committed to particular principles and objectives.
Write a response in which you discuss which view more closely aligns with your own position and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should address both of the views presented.
1：观点一在某些情况下成立
2：观点二在某些情况下成立
3：观点一二应该看情况决定
The two statement indicates a controversy, that is as political leaders, some people believe that in order to be sufficiently effective, they must yield to public opinion and abandon principle for the sake of compromise, while on the other hand, other people hold the opinion that the most essential quality of an effective leader lies in the ability to remain consistently committed to particular principles and objectives. As far as I am concerned, both stands hold some understandings of the quality to be an effective leader, and what should the leaders do depends on different circumstances.
   Admittedly, in order to be effective in deciding the directions, some political leader must concede to the public opinions and even forsake their principle to compromise, for sometimes, the ideas of the public stand a lot of the important issues and they are virtually more beneficial to the further development of the society or company, while holding your own opinions which is not political enough may lead to some deficiencies such as the loss of economy. An obviously example is that during the feudal society in China, the empirtress Ci Xi stinged to her opinions of close the oversee market of China and ignoring the advices of some officers and proteans that trading with other countries will enhance the development. As a consequence, China fell behind other country especially those who were undergoing the  Industrial Revolution.
However, yielding to the public opinions or even abandon one's own principles to cater the needs of more without any exception is not effective, and  sometimes harmful, Thus, as an political learder, under some conditions, the essential quality is the ability of remain consistently committed to particular principles and objectives. For sometimes, the ways to the ultimate destination are various and there is not a perfect solution or way to get the point, the key points are lie  in what you  do and what you think of the issue. The distinctive example is the individual development of the famous singer Britney Spares, who is called "sweet" by the ordinary American people. When she has a debut at the performing stage with her most popular song "baby one more time", it was totally a hit and that earned the name "sweet" to Britney Spares for all the people mostly parents regard her as an innocent girl which they would like their children to imitate. Nevertheless, Britney Spares didn’t cater to the public opinions and remain consistently committed to her principles and in her 3rd album; she became a sexy girl and sang some alluring songs regardless of the public opinion and consequently, it was another hit.
From the above, to be an effective leader, either yielding to public opinion or remain consistently committed to particular principles and objectives is of great importance. What could helps us with making that decision is enough thinking of the issue and investigation of the destination, only when the leaders gets handle of the problems will make the effective decision of abandoning their principles for the sake of compromise or sticking to their own particular objectives. And under some circumstance, there is no absolutely right or wrong and “all roads lead to Rome”, just you pay extreme attention to what you are doing.
In conclusion, to be an effective leader, whether yield to the public opinion or just remain consistently committed to particular principles depends on the situation you are in. and on the other hand, to be an excellent lead, there are some other qualities such as the patience to the employee, the vision to the future, the aptitude of an efficient communication with others.

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发表于 2015-7-10 20:20:57 |显示全部楼层

纯新手观点

Others believe that the most essential quality of an effective leader is the ability to remain consistently committed to particular principles and objectives.
这里是不是有逻辑问题，这个下定义应该有错误吧。
是不是文章应该对这个错误进行纠正，the ability=to solve problems in different circumstances.

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