[i习作temp] 新手ISSUE习作一篇求点评 [复制链接]

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电梯直达

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发表于 2015-8-20 20:22:10 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

本篇并非按照1+3形式所写，而是用总-分-分-总形式
第一段陈述原文观点并写出自己观点（总）
第二段写好处（分）
第三段写坏处（分）
第四段写交汇（总）
第五段总结
虽说并不是完全的1+3模式，但是跟1+3也有一些类似，主要不同应该是首段无主旨句，但是中间的每段首句都是主题句，跟1+3基本一致，第四段交汇应该是文章中很重要的一部分，这个在1+3模型中偶有提到，有的1+3模型其实是2分+1交汇，也有的是3分，个人觉得2+1比较好。然后就是这篇文章的内容了，求各位高手点评
23) Governments should place few, if any, restrictions on scientific research and development.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.

The speaker asserts that the restrictions placed on scientific research and development by government, if any, should be as few as possible. I agree this assertion to some extend; nevertheless, there exists some flaws because the speaker overlooks some adverse effects that come along with advantages.

Few restrictions, in that they promote the growth of scientific knowledge, should be favorable. In the first place, the fewer restrictions placed on scientific research and development, the faster the science improve. For instance, in the medieval era of Europe, the Catholic Church placed too many restrictions on the scientific research and development, which inhibited the development of science for a long time; however, in the period of Industrial Revolution, the science of industry had an immense progress because of fewer restrictions placed on it. Secondly, few restrictions will make scientists have more liberty to search the axioms and research something else that they are really interested.

There is no doubt that few restrictions, on the other hand, can bring about some troubles. First of all, few restrictions will inevitably produce jeopardies. Consequently, the national security, the social stability and so forth might have to face a decadence. For example, in the Second World War, Japanese military developed a lot of biological and chemical weapons which killed many soldiers of China, besides, American government also developed nuclear weapons like nuclear missile which ruined a city of Japan. Secondly, few restrictions also bring about panics of information security and food safety. It is easily to found an example. We are now in a world with the fast development of information technology, if there are only few restrictions placed on the science of information, then it is very possible that our individual information will be stolen by others without any punishment. And the development of genetically modified food has caused a panic for a long time. All of these jeopardies and panics are created because of few restrictions placed on the scientific research and development.

Thus, in order to response to these possible troubles, governments should place restrictions on scientific research and development more scrupulously: On the one hand, government should put more restrictions on the researches which may exert adverse effects for the society. On the other hand, government should put fewer restrictions on the researches which are beneficial for the society in order to embolden the scientists to make bigger contribution to the society and the country.

In sum, few restrictions, when placed on appropriately scientific research and development, are favorable to the society and the nation; otherwise, the few restrictions can evoke hazards and panics, neither of which serves to ameliorate the whole nation. However, if governments can place different numbers of restrictions in accordance to all kinds of scientific researches and developments, then the governments can, to a large extend, prevent the disadvantages thus enjoy the merits.

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