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标题: powerfulbean的个人作品集 [打印本页]

作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-10-19 10:08:41     标题: powerfulbean的个人作品集

本帖最后由 powerfulbean 于 2017-11-10 11:57 编辑

声明:这里的大部分内容来自寄托王浩老师的GRE作文6分教学博客
8月份参加了同主题写作活动,使我对GRE作文构思有了较为系统的了解,但是感觉自己的写作能力还是极差。
在这里开帖子的目的,正如王老师所讲(文章一大抄),试图通过仿写、总结的方式,增加自己的话题语料以及遣词造句的能力。
在这里向王老师的辛勤付出表示感谢。



Issue 1
As people rely more and more on technology to solve problems, the ability of humans to think for themselves will surely deteriorate.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

[划重点]题目要求:might or might not hold true

来自王老师的讲解:
由于这道题要求我们讨论在多大程度同意某命题,以及这个命题何时成立、何时不成立,我们的基本观点可以是
under conditions A or B, the statement is true because …; when conditions C or D are met, the statement does not hold true because …


我所采用的立论方法:分情况讨论,在一些日常的事务中,的确有负面影响。但是在科学研究等则不然。

大概思路:
科技在方便人们日常生活的同时,的确在某些方面影响了人们独立思考的能力:比如算数,记录事情,在网上一查便知的答案。但是在更多的地方上是帮助人们更好的去帮助人类思考如何推动世界的进步,提高效率。比如超级计算机帮助科学家快速的模拟和验证各种理论模型,这在过去是一件很费时费力的事。

Intro:
It is widely accepted that human's daily life is becoming increasingly convenient with the help of advanced modern technology. And thus some people argue that this convenience are deteriorating the ability of human to think for themselves. It is true that many people are making less independent thinking, for example, some students, instead of thinking for themselves at first,  find answers of some difficult questions directly on the internet. But under many circumstances this argument does not hold true. In many fields the advanced technology are helping people to do creative work more efficiently. For the scientists, they can use super computer to certify the accuracy of their theories. And for the businessmen, the can make more sound decisions with the help of data analysis tools.

Ts1
The concern that reliance on technology to solving problems may lead to the deterioration of thinking abilities is truly valid for some students who always find answers on the internet before thinking about it independtly as a result of technological development in network.

Ts2
Consider the scientists and engineers who are responsible for developing the theoretical and practical aspects of the new technologies. It is true that they also rely on technologies to solve their problems in research and product developments. But these technologies actually strength their own thinking abilities to solve problems in their works.
        A.  Scientists use super computer to simulate a model and critfy their theory to save time in calcuating and spend more time in thinking.
        B.  Program developer using IDE to write codes can pay more attention on creating data structure and the algorithms.
            a.  IDE can help them  to check the syntax error and save time.
       
Ts3
Businessmen can make more sound and efficient decision with the help of advanced technology.
        A. Data analysis software help them to know more information about the products, and financial status.
        B. state-of-the-art technologies for communications such as email, video conferencing and even Facebook to collect feedback from the users and data from different sources

蓝底字引用自王老师范文
作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-10-23 15:05:50

本帖最后由 powerfulbean 于 2017-11-7 14:32 编辑

Issue 2
To understand the most important characteristics of a society, one must study its major cities.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

[划重点]题目要求:might or might not hold true

基本观点同issue1
Under conditions A or B, the statement is true because ……; when conditions C or D are met, the statement does not hold true because…

看到这道题最初的一些想法:
观点:主要城市和乡村同样重要。
立论方法:分情况讨论。
具体: 主要城市的确能体现一个社会的重要特征,比如经济发展状况,国家政策的导向等等,但是同样有许多重要的特征保留在乡下,比如一些传统的文化。

这道题偏社会层面,掌握的这方面语料比较少,尤其是涉及到比较抽象的词汇。同时也发现似乎不能将问题再进一步更具体的描述。另外,似乎也需要更加注重对美国社会的了解,所以单纯的以本国家来分析似乎也不是很有说服力。

于是参考了王老师的范文,
老师的立论方式也是分情况讨论。
观点:major cities ,small towns and rural area 都很重要
立论方式:从society characteristics 的三个方面来讨论
具体:从三个方面来讨论都很重要,分别包括: political system, economic structure  public school system (即政治,经济,教育三个方面)

Intro:
The most important characteristic of a society include its political system, economic structure, and public school system. To understand each of the aspects of the society, it is important to study its major cities as well as small towns and rural areas, because the political, economic, educational institutions differ greatly among major cities, small towns, and rural areas.

Ts1:
The political system of a society is often shaped by the economic and cultural dynamics of the local communities as well as the nation as a whole.
A.        To the extent that the politics is influenced by the nation institutions such as the Constitution, it is true.
a.        One can follow the presidential candidates as they tour the major cities during their campaigns to investigate how the city residents think about the candidates.
B.        The diversity of political activities in the local communities is another important dimension of the modern society.(扣题)
a.         Voters in a small village in a Southern United State may think very differently about a specific issue compared to voters in New York.

Ts2:
Economic development is another aspect one should not overlook in order to understand the society.
A.        Usually major cities provide the physical space for economic activities that are important for the society(扣题)。
a.        International stock markets are located in major cities.
B.        Small towns and countries also play vital roles in the national economy(扣题) with their contribution to different economic sectors such as agriculture and tourism.

Ts3
One should also know how the public school systems work to fully understand the most important characteristics of a society. In many societies, the public school systems differ greatly among rural areas, suburbs and big cities as the public schools often respond to the different needs of the local communities.(扣题)
A.        In the rural areas, public schools include more courses related to agriculture in the curriculum, given the schoolchildren’s extensive experiences with the agriculture.
B.        In the major cities, with schoolchildren more likely coming from lower socioeconomic classes, the public school may emphasize a different set of values and skills in their classrooms.

作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-10-25 00:11:42

本帖最后由 powerfulbean 于 2017-11-7 14:47 编辑

Issue 20<32, 39, 98, 129, 136> (高频)
Some people believe that college students should consider only their own talents and interests when choosing a field of study. Others believe that college students should base their choice of a field of study on the availability of jobs in that field.

Write a response in which you discuss which view more closely aligns with your own position and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should address both of the views presented.

[划重点] more closely aligns with your own position

王老师的指导思路:
由于这道题要求我们讨论两面的立场并有一定的倾向性,如果我们采取分情况讨论的策略则 可以提出某些情况的比率更高因此更倾向于某个立场。
I tend agree with A because under circumstances B and C, A is true. On the other hand, A may not hold true under circumstance D which is rather unlikely.
我的观点:
兴趣是最好的老师,参照自己的兴趣选择领域可以使自己有更大的热情来做研究,有可能有更大的突破。
在感兴趣的领域内工作可以带来幸福感,提高生活质量。
的确,某些领域目前并不十分好就业。但是,未来是无法准确预测的,因此并不能因为目前很挣钱未来就一定会一样。此外,也可以通过交叉学科来使自己感兴趣的领域受到市场的欢迎。

王老师的思路:
先是质疑两个假设(第一个是未来可以准确预测、第二个是所学习的领域一定要和未来就业的领域一致),接着反驳可能的好处。

显然,我的观点有些单薄,并不具有很强的论证性。这里总结一下老师的观点,(并加入一部分自己的观点)。也算是尝试一种从来没写过的论证思路:

Intro:
Some people believe that college students should choose a field of study based on the availability of jobs in that field. In this statement, two assumption are made implicitly: first, the availability of jobs in any field can be reliable predicted at any point in time; second, students have to major in a specific field to get a job in that field. Some people may argue that following the advice in the statement can increase the chance of students getting decent jobs. I will address this argument after discussing the two assumptions.

Ts1:
The first assumption being made is that ……. This assumption is simply wrong because the demand for talents and skills are also different from time to time.
A.        In late 1990s, computer science was a field with promises of many job offers to the graduates. By the turn of the century, the burst of dot-com bubbles cut the number of computer science jobs. Nowadays, with the advent of internet and artificial intelligence, the demand for computer science majors has rebounded.

Ts2:
The second assumption is that …. The assumption is also inconsistent with the reality of the job market. Many employers do not care about what majors the job candidates study so long as they are reasonable intelligent and hard working.
A.        The big-four auditing firms actively recruit non-accounting majors from top universities around the world with the belief that their in-house training system can effectively help the fresh graduates pick up the technical knowledge while they work.
B.        People can also choose an interdisciplinary research area which involves both the fascinating field and lucrative field. On one side, they can make research in the field they are interested in. On the other side, their work may be also accepted by the market.

Ts3
Some people may insist that by choosing a field of study based on the job prospect can increase the chance of the students finding good jobs. One important issue being overlooked here is that students may not be interested in the major relevant to any given profession.
A.        Students perform better in the field they are interested in. If they cannot get a decent GPA out of the chose field, their chance if getting good job will be reduced.
B.        On the other hand, they will more likely perform better academically, and thus get better jobs.


作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-10-25 15:46:05

本帖最后由 powerfulbean 于 2017-10-26 11:04 编辑

Issue 74
Knowing about the past cannot help people to make important decisions today.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

基本思路同issue 1。

我的立论方式是从具体的方面来写。(老师提出的构思也是如此,但表述更加成熟)
王老师的话:
承诺在这里提一个自认为很巧妙的思路  
所谓巧妙是指避开讨论复杂艰深的历史问题,从生活中找到了合适的例子  
这里的重点是找到【帮助做重要决定】的【例子】,而我的惯常思维其实是找一个大的方面,但实际上操作起来有些难度。

Intro:
I strongly disagree with the statement that information about the past cannot help people make important decisions today. In daily life, information about the past play an important role in helping people make decisive choice such as predicting the benefits of a company, training the deep learning model, and choosing job candidates. / In fact, we rely on information about the past to make decisions all the time in different fields such as graduate school admission, choosing a restaurant, and employment.

Ts1
In graduate school, GPA and past research experiences are the most two important factors because such information about the applicant’s past can helped admission officers to predict the applicant’s performance in the future.

Ts2
When people decide to have dinners with friends or family members, they will choose the restaurant where they or other people have had a wonderful experience in the past.
/
People will choose the restaurant where they or other people have had a wonderful experience for dinners with friends or family members.

Ts3
The choosing job candidates for certain positions, the employers will check and see if the candidates have criminal records suggesting that they had committed crimes in the past. Some people may argue that some of those candidates with criminal records may not have a bad personality inside, and they will not harm the companies’ benefits in the future, but the record about the past can still act as an alert for potential risk in the future.

总结几个句型:
In …, As are Bs, because such A’sabstraction can ……….
神奇的倒装:
The choosing job candidates for certain positions, the employers will check and see if the candidates have criminal records suggesting that they had committed crimes in the past.

作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-10-26 12:14:22

本帖最后由 powerfulbean 于 2017-10-26 12:15 编辑

Issue 5
Claim: Governments must ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need in order to thrive.
Reason: It is primarily in cities that a nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.

今天终于要尝试Claim-reason的issue了,
先附上王老师的观点:
这种题目比较复杂,需要讨论是否同意某个论断及提出的原因。我们可以选择的立场也比较多,可以既同意论断又同意原因,可以同意论断但不同意原因并提出另一原因,甚至可以同意原因部分,但不同意论断。好在这类题仅有 19 道,建议全部列提纲准备,这样在考场上 才能应付自如。

附上老师对于两道题的思路:
Claim: When planning courses, educators should take into account the interests and suggestions of their students.
Reason: Students are more motivated to learn when they are interested in what they are studying.
对于这道题,我们可以采取分类讨论的方式,将学生分作中、小学生和大学生。
I agree that at college and postgraduate levels, professors should communicate with students as much as possible when planning the courses in order to incorporate interesting materials and topics that would motivate students to learn and conduct independent researches. However, at primary and secondary schools, teachers have to plan their courses according to national curriculum to ensure the quality of basic education and suggestions from students at these levels are less likely to be useful.  

Claim: We can usually learn much more from people whose views we share than from those whose views contradict our own.
Reason: Disagreement can cause stress and inhibit learning. 
我们可以分不同情况来讨论 reason 是否成立,然后决定论断是否成立。
When interacting with other people, we can learn more from those holding different views as long as our relationships enable us to discuss and exchange viewpoints in a rational and equal manner, e.g. as colleagues and classmates. In such relationships, disagreement do not cause stress but promote learning.  On the other hand, both the claim and the reason hold true when we could not stay calm and reasonable, e.g. fighting with spouses or political rivals.


对于本题,我的观点是:
首先claim是对的,但是reason在某些情况下是对的(古城西安、北京的文物等城市的文物保护工作),但有些时候是错的(南方的乡村)。

老师的观点
While I agree that major cities are important for preserving and generating cultural tradition, other areas are equally important in many countries.  Since cultural programs in major cities can receive support from different financial sources such as advertising, donation of city residents and big corporations, government money should be invested to programs in small towns and rural regions where resources from private sectors are not available.


整合一下观点:
首先Claim是部分对的,major cities are important, many major cities once were capital of civilization in the past。
然major cities can receive funds from different financial sources,
且a large number of rural areas also preserve many cultural traditions which may be forgotten by the residents in major cities,
故 the government also should invest funds in small towns, in terms of the limited government resources.

作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-11-1 20:41:36

本帖最后由 powerfulbean 于 2017-11-7 15:03 编辑

issue 36/72

Governments should not fund any scientific research whose consequences are unclear.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.

[划重点]: adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous

王老师的构思建议:
事实上这类指引是在十分明确的引导大家使用一种非常有用的策略-即分情况讨论。这样做的好处包括能够使观点和全文有一个清晰的框架,同时也能对问题提出一个有洞见和丰富的立场。所以这类题的基本思路可概括为
The recommendation is advantageous when condition A is met because …
The recommendation is not desirable when conditions B or C are met because …
我的观点:
Whether the government should fund a scientific research with uncertain results depends on the degree of the results. When in the computer science field, most of the bad consequences a research will have is the waste of money and time, 同样文学领域也是。但是在生物领域,我们应当加以限制。

我的观点的问题:
我的观点很难一两句就讲明白或者说论证清楚,这体现了我总结观点的不足:
单纯论证CS,显得覆盖面很小。
而讲到文学领域、生物领域,又过于宽泛,需要进一步说明。

下面总结一下王老师的观点:
对于一些将会用于商业用途的研究或者会带来道德问题的,政府应当限制资金。
对于一些目前无法明确实际价值的理论研究,政府应当资助。

范文:
Intro:
Government funding is a major source of financial support that scientific researches around the world rely on for doing their research projects. For projects that do not have clearly anticipated consequences, whether the governments should provide the funding depends on the specific nature of the research. For those projects that may lead to commercial applications or ethical crisis, the government should not spend taxpayers’ money on them. But for those theoretical research projects with no clear practical value, government support is essential.
Ts1
A.        The government should refrain from supporting the projects that may lead to commercially valuable technologies or findings. Such projects should be funded by the corporations which have better knowledge about the potential markets of the research results and can do better jobs to manage the risks.
a.        The private corporations Google have more experiences and resources to manage such projects of which the consequences in terms of financial success are far from clear.
Ts2
A.        On the other hand, taxpayers’ money should not be spent on the projects that may lead to ethically results.
a.        The government should not provide financial support to the projects such as human cloning which are related to controversies before the polemic is solved, although the technology of human cloning is on the horizon with the successful cloning of sheep.
Ts3
A.        Nevertheless, for theoretically oriented research project whose consequences are difficult to predict, the government should provide financial support to ensure efforts and money are devoted to such projects.

作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-11-2 13:55:16

本帖最后由 powerfulbean 于 2017-11-6 14:35 编辑

16.Some people believe that in order to be effective, political leaders must yield to public opinion and abandon principle for the sake of compromise. Others believe that the most essential quality of an effective leader is the ability to remain consistently committed to particular principles and objectives.

Write a response in which you discuss which view more closely aligns with your own position and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should address both of the views presented.

[划重点] more closely aligns with your own position

王老师的指导思路:
由于这道题要求我们讨论两面的立场并有一定的倾向性,如果我们采取分情况讨论的策略则 可以提出某些情况的比率更高因此更倾向于某个立场。
I tend agree with A because under circumstances B and C, A is true. On the other hand, A may not hold true under circumstance D which is rather unlikely


近期着重练习社会方面的题目,积累一些语料。

这道题的构思思路同Issue 20<32, 39, 98, 129, 136>
个人认为重点是在自己的倾向之后还要提一下另一方的观点。

我的观点:
这道题的重点是 是否向公众妥协而不是坚持原则 就能带来影响力。
我本人是更加认同坚持原则的,因为在大多数情况下,公众并不能对某些方面的问题有一个全面的了解,因此政府应当更加依赖于内部专业人士的决策。
但是,在涉及到具体的民生方面的时候,政府应当多听取民众的意见,这样才能更好地为社会服务。

老师的观点:
政府应当以最后的工作成果为目标,考虑多方的因素。即使没有顺从民意,民众也会因为有好的结果而继续支持他们。

下面提取一下老师范文的提纲:
Intro:
In democratic society, government officials are often held responsible for their decisions related to their office duty. If they fail to perform their duties and satisfy their constituencies, they may lose the next election. Therefore, some people believe that government officials should make their decisions according to the will of the people instead of making their own judgements over different issues. In my opinion, government officials should always consult the public opinions when formulating important policies. Nevertheless, it is not reasonable to carry people’s will unquestioningly because over important issues people are often divided and poorly informed. Thus, government officials should do their jobs by taking into account various factors and let the people decide if they did a satisfactory job overall in the next election.

Ts1 A与我的观点有契合之处
To begin with, I strongly believe that government officials should consult the public frequently and systematically before introducing important policies.
A.        Taking into account people’s opinions contribute to meet the needs of the people better. It is because that a better understanding of people’s thought about the issue can inform the policy-making process.
B.        Hearing people’s voices on the proposed policy will further legitimize the policy and make it easy for the government to later enforce the policy.

Ts2
Nevertheless, it is unrealistic to expect the government officials to follow people’s will blindly because people are often divided over important social issues.
A.        There is no consensus in the society on such issue as gay and lesbian marriage.

Ts3 与我的观点部分契合
Another reason why the government officials should not make decisions solely based on people’s will is that the members of the public are often notoriously ill-informed on some important issues, especially when it comes to science and technology.
A.        GM food is arguably one of the most important inventions in late 20th century, but the public has harbored a general fear of genetically modified food.

作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-11-3 15:04:15

本帖最后由 powerfulbean 于 2017-11-5 15:15 编辑

Issue:8
Claim: In any field—business, politics, education, government—those in power should step down after five years.
Reason: The surest path to success for any enterprise is revitalization through new leadership.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.   

我的观点:
的确,新的领导有时会给enterprise带来新的活力,促进它的发展。但是在某些情况下这样做同样会有一些负面影响:比如在制定长期政策后,如果在政策还没有真正落实就不干了,会造成交接的成本。科学研究也是这样。在教育领域,一个学校的建设往往需要长时间来进行,因为校长要对学校的老师和学生情况有和全面的了解。

作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-11-5 15:17:48

本帖最后由 powerfulbean 于 2017-11-5 16:59 编辑

issue 80
Nations should suspend government funding for the arts when significant numbers of their citizens are hungry or unemployed.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.

这道题我的第一反应是,的确不应该啊,人民都吃不起饭为什么还要把钱花在和吃饭不相关的方面呢。
但,我觉得还是要冷静下来思考一下。

首先,在吃不起饭的事情上,政府拨款可能是治标不治本。真正要做的是进行政策调整,解放生产力,让市场来养活人民。
其次,艺术方面的确需要政府的资助,因为真正的艺术创造不是很功利的,这就意味着搞艺术研究的人中,靠市场来养活自己很难。比如西方的音乐家,贝多芬、莫扎特,去世前都生活窘迫。
另外,艺术是文化传承和发扬的重要载体,而一个国家的文化是国家的重要组成部分,它能将人民团结起来,增强幸福感。

整合一下思路:
诚然,资金支持在解决部分就业上是有好处的(这里老师的例子很好,建造博物馆,增加就业)。
但是,解决就业更多的要在政策和经济结构上作调整。资金总有用尽的一天。艺术研究更需要资金。
最后,艺术对于国家很重要。

下面结合老师范文写一自己思路的提纲,部分摘抄老师的会用颜色标记。

Intro:
The argument that funding for arts is not justifiable given the problems of hunger and unemployment is not reasonable when we consider the contribution of the funding to job creation, the big difference the funding could make to art researches and the significance of art to nations.

Ts1:
To begin withthe government funding for the arts can help create jobs that may alleviate the problems of unemployment and hunger.
Eg. when the government finances the construction of an art museum, it will create numerous jobs in buildings industry and help stimulate the local economy. With a stronger economy, the government can then receive more tax money to provide benefits for the society, including those suffering from poverty and hunger. Once the museum is built, it will further create more jobs, including those that require low-level skills, e.g. security guards.

Ts2:
In addition, the recommendation is not helpful if the nation wants to fix this problem thoroughly, but this funding is significant to arts.
A.  we need to recognize that the problems of unemployment and hunger are not simple matters that can be solved with money alone.  The whole process involves the change of public politics or even the revolution of economic structure.
B. In many fields of art such as experimental arts, the artists cannot earn money through the market and need the funding from the college or the government to keep on their research in arts. Such as the musician Mozart, he lived a pretty poor life before he died when he was young.

Ts3
What is more, arts are so indispensable to a country that they need the funding to survive and thrive.
A. Arts are the container of a nation's culture.
Such as the literature maintain the culture of a country through stories, verse and so on.
The ancient music embodied the philosophy thoughts about the relation between people and the nature.
B.Arts which keep the culture can encourage the people overcome the hardship in life. Beethoven's No.5 symphony always galvanize the courage to fight against difficulty.

作者: zzcecilia    时间: 2017-11-6 12:19:17

PF大哥,我想请问达到您这种水平的语言表达需要学习英文多久,因为我写作经常没有内容可以,并且句式简单,用词不准确,而且用词枯燥单一.最痛苦的是有时候想用英文表达中文的意思自己都感觉理解不了,就是词不达意,很痛苦.
作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-11-6 14:28:48

zzcecilia 发表于 2017-11-6 12:19
PF大哥,我想请问达到您这种水平的语言表达需要学习英文多久,因为我写作经常没有内容可以,并且句式简单, ...

Hi,首先声明一下哈,其实我的语言表达也很差,这里面可以说大部分的内容都来自寄托王浩老师的范文。这里面的内容,有一些我觉得自己思路比较好的,会部分借鉴老师的表达,然后加上我自己的表达整合一下。有一些是觉得老师写的特别好,就几乎是照搬原句,总结成提纲。这里面颜色标记的,大部分都是我觉得需要我掌握的地道表达。
其实我的问题跟你一样,我觉得本质上是读和写以及复习的有些少了,所以如果想脚踏实地的练习写作的话,可以去王浩老师的6分作文教学博客里看一看(一楼的那个链接就是),经常做一些语言练习。
个人认为,语言没有捷径可走,只要找到对的方向,并持之以恒,就可以发现自己的进步。
作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-11-6 14:41:16

本帖最后由 powerfulbean 于 2017-11-7 14:52 编辑

issue 3/35/137

Educational institutions have a responsibility to dissuade students from pursuing fields of study in which they are unlikely to succeed.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.

【划重点】address the most compelling reasons and/or examples

王老师的基本构思方法:
这道题要求我们选择一个基本的立场-赞成或反对,但需要讨论能挑战自己观点的例证。其实这就要求我们在讨论了某种可能的反对意见后,再作出相应的反驳,从而巩固自己的观点。 基本思路为: I agree with tis claim because A and B. While some people may disagree because C, I think the claim is still true because C’.  


我的观点:
首先我是反对的。这里直接用开头段表明观点。
While some people believe that educational institutions should dissuade students from pursuing fields of study where they are unlikely to succeed, I strongly disagree with that statement. There are two assumptions are made implicitly: one is that students' future success can be judged merely by the educational institutions based on their performance captured by the institutions' officials which is just a small part of their whole life, the other one is that the responsibility of educational institutions is just to make students succeed. Others may argue that it is a waste of life to pursue a career that a student is not talented in (有时候成功是因为兴趣带来的持之以恒,而不仅仅是天赋 students perform better in the field they are interested in). I will address this argument after discussing the two assumptions.
作者: zzcecilia    时间: 2017-11-6 18:14:27

powerfulbean 发表于 2017-11-6 14:28
Hi,首先声明一下哈,其实我的语言表达也很差,这里面可以说大部分的内容都来自寄托王浩老师的范文。这里 ...

恩,您说的很对,我也这么认为.但是英文习作水平死活不提高.首先就是写作时,很容易忘词,很多词明明觉得平时记得,可做到电脑旁写东西的时候就想不起来或者不知道该怎么用.另外就是ISSUE的思路,很多ISSUE没有思路可以写,经常是大脑空白,就算有思路又苦于不会表达.每次写都要3个多小时能写一篇.
作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-11-7 12:56:43

zzcecilia 发表于 2017-11-6 18:14
恩,您说的很对,我也这么认为.但是英文习作水平死活不提高.首先就是写作时,很容易忘词,很多词明明觉得 ...

我觉得这都是语言学习的过程中会出现的正常现象。如果没有思路,就可以借鉴一下范文的啊,不必太强求完全原创。对于忘词,我觉得也很正常,这就要求我们在写完后要多次修改习作,看看能否找到更好的表达。
作者: zzcecilia    时间: 2017-11-7 14:47:30

powerfulbean 发表于 2017-11-7 12:56
我觉得这都是语言学习的过程中会出现的正常现象。如果没有思路,就可以借鉴一下范文的啊,不必太强求完全 ...

谢谢PF,您对语言的理解真的很到位,我很感同身受.就是突破不了.我空间里刚刚上传了一篇北美范文,看完以后,我更没自信了,这文章写出来我作为中国人都觉得用词相当精准地道.好多词在他的语境中看到了感觉太精确到位了,但自己写的时候又变成highly,probably,make sb to do sth,very much 等等.您可以看看,我觉得这是我见过北美范文中写的相当好的一篇了.
作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-11-7 15:08:27

zzcecilia 发表于 2017-11-7 14:47
谢谢PF,您对语言的理解真的很到位,我很感同身受.就是突破不了.我空间里刚刚上传了一篇北美范文,看完以 ...

您好,的确写的很地道,既然是范文我们也不能妄想一蹴而就的达到这个水平对不对?冒昧的问一下,您准备Gre的原因是什么呢?您是理工科?还是文科?
作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-11-7 15:08:55

本帖最后由 powerfulbean 于 2017-11-7 16:34 编辑

Issue 131 参考:https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1909761-1-1.html
Claim: Researchers should not limit their investigations to only those areas in which they expect to discover something that has an immediate, practical application.
Reason: It is impossible to predict the outcome of a line of research with any certainty.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.

这道题的claim感觉是完全没有问题的,但是reason有待商榷。
我的观点:
对于reason:我不同意,因为它说的太绝对了。
首先我很同意不能仅限于探索会带来立即回报的研究,一方面: 很多在未来会应用广泛的技术需要大量的前期投入。另一方面,许多不能马上带来现实应用的研究会被用于指导将会用于实际应用的研究。

Intro:
I strongly disapprove the reason that it is impossible to predict the outcome of a research with any certainty. It is inconsistent with the reality of researches. However, I agree that researches should also take part in the research which they believe that will not bring immediate and practical outcome. In fact, many popular technologies involved researches which last so many years that cannot bring practical benefits immediately, and there are also some theoretical researches which can provide instruction to other practical researches but do not bring immediately outcome once they are finished.

来自王老师的Ts1,觉得是反驳reason的很好地观点, 我在里面加上了in the foreseeable future
most researchers can predict the outcome of their research in the foreseeable future (个人认为加上foreseeable future会比较严谨); otherwise, they may not be able to get financial support (reject the reason)
- researchers have to convince the reviewers that their research proposals are feasible and promising
- they need to justify the research goals by reviewing the literature
- they have to design the methodolgoy and discuss the anticipated results in their proposals
- most research projects with financial support will lead to some expected outcome (but the outcome may be purely theoretical; nothing practical)

作者: zzcecilia    时间: 2017-11-7 15:09:47

powerfulbean 发表于 2017-11-7 15:08
占楼

文科,就是准备出去上学
作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-11-7 15:12:48

zzcecilia 发表于 2017-11-7 15:09
文科,就是准备出去上学

厉害啦,怪不得您对作文这么上心。
您如果空闲时间多的话可以一起每天挑一个题目练习写作啊,一起参照优秀的范文积累一些好的思路和表达方式。咱们也可以互相改一改。
作者: zzcecilia    时间: 2017-11-7 15:29:54

我倒很想这样,但是我作文能力很差,一篇作文要写3小时左右,而且有时候一点思路都写不出来.
作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-11-8 10:17:32

本帖最后由 powerfulbean 于 2017-11-8 11:31 编辑

https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1777232-1-1.html
【argument】1
Woven baskets characterized by a particular distinctive pattern have previously been found only in the immediate vicinity of the prehistoric village of Palea and therefore were believed to have been made only by the Palean people. Recently, however, archaeologists discovered such a "Palean" basket in Lithos, an ancient village across the Brim River from Palea. The Brim River is very deep and broad, and so the ancient Paleans could have crossed it only by boat, and no Palean boats have been found. Thus it follows that the so-called Palean baskets were not uniquely Palean.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

观点:这个baskets不是palean独有的
原文证据:
-因为在和palean一河之隔的 lithos也发现了这种basket
-河很深,只能靠船来通过
-但是palean没有发现船。

可能存在的证据及其影响:
-也许这些baskets可以在水里飘起来从而运输,反驳
-也许古代的船或者桥无法保存到今天,反驳
-也许古代的时候河没有那么宽和深,反驳

【argument】2
The following appeared as part of a letter to the editor of a scientific journal.
"A recent study of eighteen rhesus monkeys provides clues as to the effects of birth order on an individual's levels of stimulation. The study showed that in stimulating situations (such as an encounter with an unfamiliar monkey), firstborn infant monkeys produce up to twice as much of the hormone cortisol, which primes the body for increased activity levels, as do their younger siblings. Firstborn humans also produce relatively high levels of cortisol in stimulating situations (such as the return of a parent after an absence). The study also found that during pregnancy, first-time mother monkeys had higher levels of cortisol than did those who had had several offspring."

Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument.

观点:
出生顺序对个体的激励水平有影响。
证据:
-猴子
-人类
-猴子第一次怀孕

其他的解释:
年长,所以更懂事一些(这点同王老师不谋而合)
【王老师】挑毛病:没有control the individual size
既然第一胎的母亲也有高水平的cortisol,也会对第一胎的孩子产生影响。

【argument】3
The following appeared as a letter to the editor from a Central Plaza store owner.
"Over the past two years, the number of shoppers in Central Plaza has been steadily decreasing while the popularity of skateboarding has increased dramatically. Many Central Plaza store owners believe that the decrease in their business is due to the number of skateboard users in the plaza. There has also been a dramatic increase in the amount of litter and vandalism throughout the plaza. Thus, we recommend that the city prohibit skateboarding in Central Plaza. If skateboarding is prohibited here, we predict that business in Central Plaza will return to its previously high levels."

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.

观点:
在购物广场内滑板应当被禁止
观点证据:
购物人数减少,滑板人数急剧增多
许多商户认为原因是这个
垃圾和损坏公物的现象多

需要解决的问题:
两个人数变化的时间先后,到底谁先发生的
调查的商户范围够广吗?
是谁损坏的公物,扔的垃圾?

王老师的示范:
What are the reasons why people do not come to Central Plaza?  What are the reasons why the business decreased in Central Plaza?   
What are the causes of litter and vandalism?
Can skateboarding be effectively prohibited?
What will happen if it is prohibited.


【argument】4
The following appeared in a letter from a homeowner to a friend.
"Of the two leading real estate firms in our town—Adams Realty and Fitch Realty—Adams Realty is clearly superior. Adams has 40 real estate agents; in contrast, Fitch has 25, many of whom work only part-time. Moreover, Adams' revenue last year was twice as high as that of Fitch and included home sales that averaged $168,000, compared to Fitch's $144,000. Homes listed with Adams sell faster as well: ten years ago I listed my home with Fitch, and it took more than four months to sell; last year, when I sold another home, I listed it with Adams, and it took only one month. Thus, if you want to sell your home quickly and at a good price, you should use Adams Realty."

Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.

观点:
卖房字选adams更好
原因:
Adam的办事处多,并且Fitch有很对临时工
收入高,房子均价高
他个人的经历,卖房子块

基于的假设,及不成立后的影响:
【老师的观点】:full-time agents多就好。
But it is important to note that they also generate more revenue which means they will need to sell more homes. Therefore, the human efforts devoted to each home for sale are not necessarily greater in Adams.  But it is possible that selling a particular home requires the networking with a particular group of customers that only part-time agents with more time to spend with other people may have.

收入高,代表利润高。也许adam的之处成本也高。
均价高,代表房子的价格都高。也许只是adam卖了很多本身就很贵的房子。(同老师)
不同时间段购房需求是相同的。也许卖的快是因为那段时间购房需求大。(同老师)
作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-11-9 14:55:38

本帖最后由 powerfulbean 于 2017-11-10 11:59 编辑

【argument】5.
The following appeared in a letter to the editor of the Balmer Island Gazette. "On Balmer Island, where mopeds serve as a popular form of transportation, the population increases to 100,000 during the summer months. To reduce the number of accidents involving mopeds and pedestrians, the town council of Balmer Island should limit the number of mopeds rented by the island's moped rental companies from 50 per day to 25 per day during the summer season. By limiting the number of rentals, the town council will attain the 50 percent annual reduction in moped accidents that was achieved last year on the neighboring island of Seaville, when Seaville's town council enforced similar limits on moped rentals."

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.

文章观点:
这个island应该在夏天减少M的数量从而减少行人和M的交通事故数
论据:
-M是很流行的交通工具,同时夏天人很多
-限制租赁公司租出M的数量来减少M和行人发生事故数
-因为隔壁岛这么做减少了一半,这个岛也可以。

问题:
【王老师】 sources of mopeds in Balmer, 也许来源不止从公司租赁
【王老师】Another important question we need to ask is about the nature and the causes of the accidents
本岛和Seaville的相似程度

【argument】6
Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic regions. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the course of the year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed and cold enough, at least some of the year, for the ice to cover the sea separating the islands, allowing the deer to travel over it. Unfortunately, according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, we can conclude that the purported decline in deer populations is the result of the deer's being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

观点:
海上冰层减少导致鹿的数量减少。
论据:
-鹿依靠冰层来穿梭于岛之间从而寻找食物。
-他们的栖息地既要冷又要温暖。
-猎人对于数量减少的报告和海冰融化时间相吻合。
需要的证据:
-的确没有足够的sea ice来让鹿在岛之间穿梭
-鹿需要迁移的时间和海冰融化的时间
-单独岛上的食物是否也在减少
-是否有其他的更重要的原因导致数量的减少。
-【王老师】more evidence about the accuracy of the hunters' reports
-     whether the hunters had scared away the deer with their guns
-     whether the hunters had visited the area in a particular point in time when the deer were less active
-     how many hunters had reported the deer population;the number was small- less reliable
作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-11-10 12:00:25

本帖最后由 powerfulbean 于 2017-11-10 16:44 编辑

【argument】7
.The following is a recommendation from the Board of Directors of Monarch Books.
"We recommend that Monarch Books open a café in its store. Monarch, having been in business at the same location for more than twenty years, has a large customer base because it is known for its wide selection of books on all subjects. Clearly, opening the café would attract more customers. Space could be made for the café by discontinuing the children's book section, which will probably become less popular given that the most recent national census indicated a significant decline in the percentage of the population under age ten. Opening a café will allow Monarch to attract more customers and better compete with Regal Books, which recently opened its own café."

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.

Board's conclusion:
Open a cafe in the Monarch Books store
Reasons based:
-Open cafe would attract more customers
-Space could be made by discontiuing children's book section
-Children's book section will become less popular as census indicate the decline in the population under age ten.
-Regal books open its own cafe.

Questions:
-Whether many customers like drinking cafe at the store or not.
-What would happen if they discontinue children's book section because many customers are brought by their children to this store. They loose a lot of customers as their children are more likely go to another store with children's book section.
-If the demand of children's book will truly decrease just because of the decline of children's population.
-Does the Monarch books is under same condition as the regal books?

the move to build a new cafe is necessary for

老师的范文的巧妙之处在于最后一段
As far as competing against Regal Books is concerned, the first question one needs to investigate is whether or not the new cafe at Regal has been successful in attracting more customers.  If Regal's new cafe is not very attractive, there is little incentive for Monarch to follow the practice.  Even if the Regal is successful in building an attractive cafe, one has to review the size of investment that is required for the project and decide whether Monarch can afford the same amount of financial commitment.  Meanwhile, other options for attracting more customers, for example building an online shop, should also be explored.


【argument】8
.The following appeared in a memo from the director of student housing at Buckingham College.
"To serve the housing needs of our students, Buckingham College should build a number of new dormitories. Buckingham's enrollment is growing and, based on current trends, will double over the next 50 years, thus making existing dormitory space inadequate. Moreover, the average rent for an apartment in our town has risen in recent years. Consequently, students will find it increasingly difficult to afford off-campus housing. Finally, attractive new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham."

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

Conclusion:
The C college should build more dorms.
Reason:
-enrollment is growing make dorm space inadequate
-average rent for an apartment rose
-attractive new dorms can make students more likely enroll at here
Evidence needed:
-First we should figure out how many dorms we have and if our existing dorms truly cannot satisfy the demand.
-It is also important to figure how many students choose rent outside the campus, and if they could afford it.
May be many students like live on their own.
(The data about the average rent of the apartment in town is not very useful as it includes apartments that may be far away from the campus and therefore not available to Buckingham students.  It would be more useful to look at the average rents of the off-campus apartments that Buckingham students usually chose to live in and see if these apartments will become increasingly expensive in future. )

-The third is that we should make a research about why students choose B college, may be the college's academic achievement is so brilliant that new dorms are not the main reason to increase enrollment.

【argument】9
Nature's Way, a chain of stores selling health food and other health-related products, is opening its next franchise in the town of Plainsville. The store should prove to be very successful: Nature's Way franchises tend to be most profitable in areas where residents lead healthy lives, and clearly Plainsville is such an area. Plainsville merchants report that sales of running shoes and exercise clothing are at all-time highs. The local health club has more members than ever, and the weight training and aerobics classes are always full. Finally, Plainsville's schoolchildren represent a new generation of potential customers: these schoolchildren are required to participate in a fitness-for-life program, which emphasizes the benefits of regular exercise at an early age.

Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.


作者: powerfulbean    时间: 2017-11-18 22:32:09

issue 13: Universities should require every student to take a variety of courses outside the student's field of study.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.

Nowadays, lots of universities encourage students to take the courses outside their major. I strongly approve what they do, cause learning knowledge brings students benefits both in life and career in the future. Some people may argue that it is a waste of time and students can learn those knowledge outside the course. I will answer this question after providing analysis to the benefits of learning the outside major courses.

People can have more hobbies to help them relax from the daily pressure. By taking PE class, students can be familiar some kinds of sports, and they can practice this sports with their friends outside the classes. Thus, they can improve their health condition and cultivate friendship. For example, many students who were not familiar with soccer before enrolled in the college choose the soccer class. After the class, they often raise friendly contest together and during the process both their body and the friendship is strengthened. As we all know, routinely exercises are indispensable, the university should require their students to take courses outside their major.

In addition, taking courses outside the major is beneficial to students’ future career. On one hand, it can prepare students prepare for the future interdisciplinary research or works. For example, many computer scientists have learned about the biological courses to help them make exploration in bioinformatics. Also, some biostatic scientists also should be familiar with programming to invent new programs. On the other hand, taking these courses may be can help them find the major they truly talent in. For example, many engineering students choose to make music after their university, and make well achievements and also live a happiness life. There some possibilities that they have chosen music class during their school time. So we can see that learning courses outside is also beneficial to future career.

However, some people may say that it is a waste of time and money, because with the development of network, students can also learn different kinds of knowledge in their daily life but not from the courses provided by the school. As far as my concerned, there are some disadvantages of learning through the network. The first is that many of the courses on websites cannot provide students with comprehensive introduction, and we can also verify the correctness of some of the courses. Plus, the professors in the school are more capable of answering students’ questions about this field of study and supervising those students. So, compared to the loss of money and time, it is more valuable to accepted professional supervision and introduction in a field of study.

In conclusion, I strongly approve that college encourage students to choose course outside there major. It is because that students can beneficial from it both in their daily and future career. What is more, it is not a waste of time and money to learn these courses as they provided more professional and systematical education to students.

老师的范文:
n today’s competitive world, holding a college degree can no longer guarantee good job placement or  career success.  Some people argue that students should be required to take courses outside their major area to broaden their perspetives and better prepare for future careers.  Others believe that such requirement is not necessary as courses outside students’ field will not be helpful for future jobs.  In my opinion, taking courses outside one’s speciality can benefit one’s academic study, development of citizenship as well as future career.  

To begin with, taking courses from other field can help students to study their own majors more effectively by introducing the students different perspectives and methods from other disciplines.  Take the students majoring in English and linguistics as examples. By taking courses in computer science, English majors can learn basic programming skills and latest technologies in natural language processing which can help them to explore interesting issues in English and linguistics based on corpus.  Through courses on psychology, English students can also study how learning efficiencies were affected by different factors and better understand the issues in second language acquisition.  As the examples clearly illustrate, taking courses from related disciplines can help student to study their own majors more effectively.  

Courses in other fields can also help students become more responsible citizens capable of making informed decisions on different social issues.  Arts and humanities students can gain more insights into how technologies transformed the society and what ethical and political issues we have to deal with by taking some courses in science and engineering.  Science and technology majors can also better understand the current debates on different political issues by taking courses in history, economics and political science.  The effective operation of out democratic society depends on the collective wisdom of well-educated citizens.  The proposed requirement of courses from different fields can contribute to cultivating better citizens for the society.  

Some people may argue that no courses should be required unless such courses are beneficial for students’ future jobs.  In fact, many courses outside one’s discipline can be helpful for students’ career development.  Taking writing-intensive courses in history and philosophy, for example, can help business students to sharpen their writing skills, which are essential for effective communication in any jobs they may take.  Programming skills that math students can develop through computer science courses will also enable the math graduates to apply their math models to big data in their workplace by developing appropriate computer programs.  On the other hand, it is rather short-sighted to focus on the direct benefits for jobs that students may gain from courses.  After all, universities are not merely vocational training schools.  Students should be encouraged to pursue goals that are not career-oriented.  

In conclusion, I believe that requiring students to take courses outside their fields is beneficial for their academic studies as well as their development of citizenship. While it is also helpful for their future career development, this concern should not be the only consideration when we make decisions.





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