Argument写作入门-开头段第一步：梳理结论、论据

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找到啦，老师

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老师，下面是我的总结和看了您的答案之后的改写：

According to the director, Buckingham College should build more new dormitories to attract more prospective students because of the increasing enrollment and higher rent of off-campus housing.
改写：
According to the director, Buckingham College should promise to build more dorms because of the projected enrollment in the next 50 years and expected shortage of the dorms. Meanwhile, this will be beneficial to the students who cannot afford the off-campus apartments which are more expensive in average. In this way will the college attract more prospective students.

Revise by tesolchina

According to the director, Buckingham College should plan to build more dorms because of the projected enrollment in the next 50 years and expected shortage of the dorms. Meanwhile, this will be beneficial to the students who cannot afford the off-campus apartments which become more expensive in average and the college for attracting more prospective students.

写作就是通过这样一句一句的修改来提高的

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22) According to a recent report, cheating among college and university students is on the rise. However, Groveton College has successfully reduced student cheating by adopting an honor code, which calls for students to agree not to cheat in their academic endeavors and to notify a faculty member if they suspect that others have cheated. Groveton's honor code replaced a system in which teachers closely monitored students; under that system, teachers reported an average of thirty cases of cheating per year. In the first year the honor code was in place, students reported twenty-one cases of cheating; five years later, this figure had dropped to fourteen. Moreover, in a recent survey, a majority of Groveton students said that they would be less likely to cheat with an honor code in place than without. Thus, all colleges and universities should adopt honor codes similar to Groveton's in order to decrease cheating among students.

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.


According to the arguer, all colleges and universities should accept honor codes similar to Groveton’s to decrease the cheating cases among the students, because the numbers of cheating cases has declined since the use of honor code in Groveton and students responded that they would be less possible to cheat with this new method.

改写：
According to the arguer, all colleges and universities should follow the example of Groveton to adopt the honor codes to decrease the cases of cheating.

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直接改写上面同学的开头段：
66. The following appeared in a memo from the owner of a chain of cheese stores located throughout the United States.

"For many years all the stores in our chain have stocked a wide variety of both domestic and imported cheeses. Last year, however, all of the five best-selling cheeses at our newest store were domestic cheddar cheeses from Wisconsin. Furthermore, a recent survey by Cheeses of the World magazine indicates an increasing preference for domestic cheeses among its subscribers. Since our company can reduce expenses by limiting inventory, the best way to improve profits in all of our stores is to discontinue stocking many of our varieties of imported cheese and concentrate primarily on domestic cheeses."


Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.

The owner of a chain of cheese store supposed that they should stop stocking the imported cheeses and focus on domestic ones，because the top 5 best-selling cheeses are from Wisconsin and the subscribers of a magazine prefer to domestic ones. Moreover, doing so can reduce their expenses and improve profits.

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第二道开头段：

67. The following appeared as part of a business plan developed by the manager of the Rialto Movie Theater.

"Despite its downtown location, the Rialto Movie Theater, a local institution for five decades, must make big changes or close its doors forever. It should follow the example of the new Apex Theater in the mall outside of town. When the Apex opened last year, it featured a video arcade, plush carpeting and seats, and a state-of-the-art sound system. Furthermore, in a recent survey, over 85 percent of respondents reported that the high price of newly released movies prevents them from going to the movies more than five times per year. Thus, if the Rialto intends to hold on to its share of a decreasing pool of moviegoers, it must offer the same features as Apex."


Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.


The manager suggested that the Rialto Movie Theater should adopt the same method of the Apex Theater to prevent the decreasing moviegoers to decline continually, because of the fact that the facilities of the Apex Theater were of high-leveled and 85% respondents of a recent survey considered the high price of new movies were prohibitive.

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The president of Grove College has recommended that the college abandon its century-old tradition of all-female education and begin admitting men. Pointing to other all-female colleges that experienced an increase in applications after adopting coeducation, the president argues that coeducation would lead to a significant increase in applications and enrollment. However, the director of the alumnae association opposes the plan. Arguing that all-female education is essential to the very identity of the college, the director cites annual surveys of incoming students in which these students say that the school's all-female status was the primary reason they selected Grove. The director also points to a survey of Grove alumnae in which a majority of respondents strongly favored keeping the college all female.

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.


The president of Grove College suggested that the college should discontinue its tradition of all-female education and adopt coeducation following the example of other all-female colleges. However, the director of the alumnae association apposed this proposal citing the results of two surveys.

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Argument2、The following appeared as part of a letter to the editor of a scientific journal.
"A recent study of eighteen rhesus monkeys provides clues as to the effects of birth order on an individual's levels of stimulation. The study showed that in stimulating situations (such as an encounter with an unfamiliar monkey), firstborn infant monkeys produce up to twice as much of the hormone cortisol, which primes the body for increased activity levels, as do their younger siblings. Firstborn humans also produce relatively high levels of cortisol in stimulating situations (such as the return of a parent after an absence). The study also found that during pregnancy, first-time mother monkeys had higher levels of cortisol than did those who had had several offspring."

Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument.

结论：
Birth order has effects on an individual's levels of stimulation.
      
论据：
(1)        The study showed that in stimulating situations (such as an encounter with an unfamiliar monkey), firstborn infant monkeys produce up to twice as much of the hormone cortisol, which primes the body for increased activity levels, as do their younger siblings.
(2)Firstborn humans also produce relatively high levels of cortisol in stimulating situations (such as the return of a parent after an absence).
(3)The study also found that during pregnancy, first-time mother monkeys had higher levels of cortisol than did those who had had several offspring.




According to the author, he supposed that birth order influenced an individual’s levels of stimulation citing the evidence about more hormone cortisol of both first born infant monkeys and humans and higher amount of cortisol of the first-time mother monkeys during pregnancy .
However, in this argument, there are some other reasonable explanations we need to take into account so that we can make a more convincing judgment.