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本期的每日一评来自jinziqi童鞋的一篇issue,原文在此 https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1056652-1-1.html 50. In order to improve the quality of instruction at the college and university level, all faculty should be required to spend time working outside the academic world in professions relevant to the courses they teach.
The author claims that all faculty need to find a relevant job in the society to improve the quality of instruction, which I can’t totally agree with. On one hand, it is really helpful to ask teachers to go outside academia to see the real society. On the other hand, it is hard to find a suitable job for some professors in literature field or art field, and it is also difficult to keep a balance on working well in a job and teaching well(native说法是：strike a balance between ... and ...) in the class at the same time. So, the author should not simply ask teachers to go outside the academy to work, but to think the issue from a whole perspective.
从第一段论述上看来中规中矩，虽然没有出彩的地方，但是提出了自己的看法：not totally agree with,也就是部分赞成，部分反对，那么下文一定是分情况讨论（我相信是分领域讨论，毕竟这样比较容易，比如数学物理就没必要出去，工程建筑就有必要出去），关键是看你的论述是如何支持你的分观点
In some fields, such as the electronic engineering and computer science, it is indeed helpful for faculty to see how the society applies what they have taught in the class to the reality. For most colleges and universities, education among undergraduates is the most fundamental, which is mainly to cultivate one’s interest so that he can choose a direction to develop in the future.(这句话放在这里是为了说明什么？跟TS没有关系的话，会让人误解你的本意) If professors know well about how every aspect is being developed in the society, he can tell the true story in the real world（立足点错了，faculty去实习，不是为了告诉true story, story读书上网都能看到，凭什么一定要工作才知道？这里最重要的是impart experience or lessons，这才是老师可以去工作的原因。后面的为了encourage什么，也不是最重要的原因，鼓励的话，奖品，荣誉，都能encourage,区区一个story作用太小了。只有亲身体验的经验教训，才是书本上读不到的，才是走上社会最需要的） to motivate students and encourage them to devote in one of directions in the area to develop it or discovery. Take the 3G as an example, if a professor knows the technique well in the market, he can not only teach the principle of 3G to his students, but also tell students about how the technique was developed to be applied in the real society and what kind of difficulty did they meet when spreading it to the world（这些知识仍然可以通过别的渠道获得，而且即使是工人，要了解这些也只限于做宣传和销售的人才能了解这块，并不是每一个worker都了解如何application的，所以你的这个例子对赞成工作没有区别。我甚至可以作为反对工作的一个例子，只要我改写成：“相对工作，教授们更应该注重积累教的东西的应用方面的知识，如果一个教授能查阅文书和相关资料获得一个东西是如何应用的，他同样可以.... 所以就没有必要出去工作。” 明白了么？既然要论述，就要论述unique的，用其他方法做不到的，personal experience or opinion就是之一）. These kinds of facts can tell students how to achieve their dream in the real society, which cannot be read in textbooks.
However, in other fields which are more theoretical, it is difficult to find a suitable job in the society. （前后文逻辑大跳！这一段的TS,你用强调句式强调了difficult（to find a suitable job），那么下文应该主要叙述的是为什么difficult,比如社会上对学科的不重视，或者工作机会不多等等，但是你下文笔锋一转，转到了：“这些老师在实验室当中或者一直思考问题，是更适合他们的”，跳动太大了。）For some professors whose major is math or physics, they may always stay in labs to compute a complicated condition or try to design an experiment to prove a theory to work out more issues, which is good for him to improve his ability in research, so that he can teach students clearly about the principles in one area. But because they lack of knowledge of other applied subjects, their talents will be wasted（这个waste怎么出来的，前后文没有任何的解释） on a specific job.
In addition, it is hard to balance the work and teaching at the same time. （漏掉了跟进的论述，会让你的example出现的过于突然，同时对TS的支持度减弱，因为rater无法明白你是如何把例子套到ts的观点上的。比如你在这里应该跟进类似这种的论述：“Working will take a bluk of spare time of professors and they would feel it difficult to arrange their time appropriately. As a result, both teaching and working will be influenced”）If a teacher, who teaches archaeology, goes outside the campus and finds a job and he is assigned to a village which is a long distance from the college, how can he teach in the class? It is true he will gain a lot of experience in the true condition when they excavate a body or a tomb, but he will definitely lose the opportunity of having classes for having no time. For these kinds of areas, some friends, working in the real environment, may be enough to know more information in detail about the real work. So, professor can ask them to make up the disadvantages(这句话虽然提出一个可行方案，但是你没有考虑到它直接和你第二段的论述矛盾了，读者就会想：“既然这里说可以问别人，问什么第二段你说一定要出去工作？同样问别人不行么？”). The most effective things that professors should teach his students are ways to research and how to make full use of one’s imagination to improve the area.
To sum up, making faculty go outside the academic world can do help sometimes, but for some professors, it is hard to put it into practice. The author should think this issue from an overall situation to fit for all faculty.
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发表于 2010-2-2 16:49:38
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发表于 2010-2-2 20:32:41
发表于 2010-2-3 01:27:43
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