【News Flash之8月12日篇】进军美利坚之作文贴_好吧那就这样

好吧那就这样UID：2846511

7.24（08.12.05NA）
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Sports teach people lessons about life.

It seems all of those crazy football fans just sent away their most favorable carnival---2010 South Africa World Cup---with tears and joy, and I was no exception. My friends and I ran into gyms to have some relax after celebration anyway. We cannot deny that today sports have already become an indespensable component of our daily life. But have you ever wondered that "do sports teach us lessons about life or do they not?" I have! For my perspective, sports are the vivid teachers of our life.

First of all, people who loves sports have a better understanding of the importance of teamwork and persistence. It is particularly well reflected in team sports, such as football, basketball and hockey etc. These valuable characters are required extremely in today's society, which are also exactly what people lose the most. For example, my father, who was a member of his school baseball team, he used to tell me that during his school time, after experiencing two-year rigorous training and countless intense competitions, he finally turned to be a person who was always strict with himself and never gave up easily, which still continued to now, in his business career. He cherishes this quality very much.

Besides what we brought up above, sports help people establish healthy minds. In real life, for people especially those who live in economically developed cities, half the time during work days have been used obligatorily before cold desks in their supressed offices. They long for fresh air more than ever. They choose to take some aerobic exercises like yoga. These kinds of quiet sports make those physically and mentally exhausted people spend some time only on themselves, their bodies and their spirit. Sports give them opportunities to get to know themselves; teach them always to be sober and sane when things are out of control.

Sports are like our loyal friends.When we have troubles, go have some sports and you will get some solutions. I believe if we do learn things from sports, success finally will come to us someday. That's why I hold the view that sports teach people lessons about life.

云涛云涛UID：2861490

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Sports teach people lessons about life.
1 S) \2 x2 L4 h' R- J; ~. E6 k$ y. u+ P- L
It seems all of those crazy football fans just sent away their most favorable carnival---2010 South Africa World Cup---with tears and joy, and I was no exception【应该是OF NO EXCEPTION】. My friends and I ran into gyms to have some relax after celebration anyway. We cannot deny that today sports have already become an indespensable component of our daily life. But have you ever wondered that "do sports teach us lessons about life or do they not?" I have! For my perspective, sports are the vivid teachers of our life.  d: c# i2 b6 J& ?- \) [- ]. S. Y2 c
! Y  {3 D  J6 K) Z2 v# s0 U
First of all, people who loves sports have a better understanding of the importance of teamwork and persistence. It is particularly well reflected in team sports, such as football, basketball and hockey etc. These valuable characters are required extremely in today's society, which are also exactly what people lose the most. For example, my father, who was a member of his school baseball team, he【应该去掉】
used to tell me that during his school time, after experiencing two-year rigorous training and countless intense competitions, he finally turned to be a person who was always strict with himself and never gave up easily, which still continued to now 【个人感觉不是很地道】, in his business career. He cherishes this quality very much. 7 h2 E" E7 a/ F+ F
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Besides what we brought up above, sports help people establish healthy minds. In real life, for people especially those who live in economically developed cities 【这个表达感觉也有些啰嗦的，建议直接用metropolis】, half the time during work days have 【这个是不是应该用HAS】 been used obligatorily before cold desks in their supressed offices. They long for fresh air more than ever. They choose to take some aerobic exercises like yoga. These kinds of quiet sports make those physically and mentally exhausted people spend some time only on themselves, their bodies and their spirit. Sports give them opportunities to get to know themselves; teach them always to be sober and sane when things are out of control.3 H/ g3 [6 T. [
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Sports are like our loyal friends. When we have troubles, go have some sports and you will get some solutions. I believe if we do learn things from sports, success finally will come to us someday. That's why I hold the view that sports teach people lessons about life.

文章思路清晰
例子也举得比较有说服力
尤其能够透过文字感觉到作者十分敢于表达自己的想法
不过最大的感觉就是觉得作者的英文水平仍然欠火候
除了一些拼写错误之外
许多的表达也不是很地道

我划出来的绿色是拼写错误
红色是我觉得可以修改的地方
这是我第一次修改
如有不足 请多理解
有则改之 无则加勉 与君共勉！

好吧那就这样UID：2846511

谢谢啊 我就是觉得自己的修辞很有问题 看人家漂亮的用词 我很是羞愧啊
我要努力

还有谁有真知灼见的？

yozujUID：2736441

我想知道 我是要改你们两个人的对吧
我的在这里
https://bbs.gter.net/bbs/thread-1128401-1-1.html
不限时写的第一次 所以欢迎拍砖拍砖
云涛云涛的作文贴 请多指教！【本人0821威海考场】
0724题目
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Sports teach people lessons about life


According to a report, in 2008, Beijing attracted more than 7 million people to buy tickets to watch the Olympic Games, breaking the records of audience hold by previous host cities. Why people show such an enthusiasm towards sports? In my opinion, the reasons lie not only on the fierce competition and exciting atmosphere but also on the lessons that people acquire from sports (觉得好突兀前面后面能有东西衬托一下，比如列举一下能学到什么，比如competition cooperation等等).

In the first place, sports demonstrate the charm of unity（我觉得说“团体” 不如说成“合作”，前者好像更加强调的是团结精神，后者比较实际一点可以写很多东西）. As we all know, among the most popular kind of sports are football, baseball, basketball, ice hockey and other so-called "team sports", which all require cooperation to have a good performance. I'd like to take Lionel Andrés Messi, the most gifted football player in the world, and his Argentina football team as an example. Before the 2010 World Cup, Argentina was considered most likely to win the golden cup （jules rimet cup吧 我觉得金杯有点奇怪 说成大力神杯比较好） with the help of Messi. Surprisingly, they were defeated and eliminated by German football team（Germany就可以了） and contrary to Argentine focus on personal talents and skills is German emphasis on team-work（这里语法混乱了）. 不要用and Contrary to Argentina, Germany emphasis more on team-work rather than personal skills.接着你要说说生活中cooperation的东西，这样才能说sport teach lessons of life.


Also, we are inspired by the perseverance displayed through sports. History is filled with instances of successes after countless practices. Michael Phelps, for example, was diagnosed with Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) in his youth. However, instead of giving up swimming, Michael chose to practice harder and harder and so amazing is his training intensity that he swam as long as 12 miles every day! By training hard and enough confidence, Phelps conquered top of the Olympic stage. Just as he said," Records are always made to be broken no matter what they are and anybody can do anything that he sets his mind to.”这一段时态很奇怪，另外还是没有联系到daily life 只是一直地在说sport的东西。

Another point that sports teach us is to have an active attitude and enjoy life. Nowadays, people often complain about the too much pressure on their shoulder but what they failed to realize is the fact that they can simply relax themselves by sports. Why not leave the city on the weekends and play golf with friends? Remember the name "golf" derives from Green, Oxygen, Light and friendship!(我一直觉得第三段是压轴的 所以我觉得第三段有点弱 反而可以放到最后一段去作为呼吁之类的东西)
To sum up, sports show us the significance of unity, lead us to have a brave heart and guide us to regain the beauty of lives.（太过简单了）

好吧那就这样UID：2846511

8月5日交   09.05.30NA
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Younger school children (ages five to ten) should be required to study art and music in addition to math, science, history and language.


It is not uncommon that in this day and age younger children prefer to establish their own channels on Youtube for sharing their original songs and paitings than to follow their peers indiscriminately to join in some abstruse science groups. For the sake of shaping children's personalities, I firmly agree with the social phenomenon that the increasing importance of studying art and music.

Few would deny that children are supposed to be promoted mental and emotional development. Learning art and music is definitely a desirable option. It plays a significant role in cultivating younger children's team spirit and the ability of self-expression. For example, when a child in a band orchestra, playing his/her instrument, it's inevitable for him/her to cooperate with other players, thereby enabling him/her to communicate with them so as to make it better. Moreover, it gives students motivation to come up with more creative ideas, which is an indispensable component in contemporary education.

Aside from this advantage, it takes extremely hard work for younger children, once learning an instrument well. To improve performance, they have to put in heart and soul in constant training. By that I mean if younger children learn art and music, they will become more resilient and aggressive rather than being a mediocre student, merely satisfying limited knowledge from textbooks. Given the intense competition in today's society, learning art and music seems to lay a solid foundation for their future employable skills. Furthermore, art classes give priority to afford opportunities for certain jobs, such as singers, composers and illustrators.

Besides what I presented above, knowledge about art and music can raise younger children's cultural awarenesses, while stimulating their interests about foreign arts history and customs. At the mean time, not only can explore childrens' brand new range of vision, it will also fulfill their social potential, for instance, they can make friends with those who come from different countries. Hence, it makes more possible for younger children to become a global elites.

Therefore, it is no exaggeration to say that learning art and music is equal important as learning math and science. Actually, more and more essential measures and policies should be taken into well-rounded oriented education, after all, children are the bright future of the world.

anitaxjaUID：2758421

见附件

好吧那就这样UID：2846511

谢谢 晚点我发个改进版的

好吧那就这样UID：2846511

yylbjUID：2764695

A variety of foreign movies and TV programs have been downloaded into me(me and friends’?) and my friends' Ipods. They've become an appealing(好词，学习) way of our leisure time schedules. But when it comes to what kind of movies and TV programs that we're really interested in , the ones made in our own country or those made in other countries. My answer is half and half.（这个说法不地道吧）

In terms of cultural identity and belonging, movies and TV programs made in our country make people feel much closer as they build a similar daily-life world. Simply stated, no matter how profound they will be, since we speak the same language, it firstly removes the barrier for the basic comprehension. For example, it's clear that we Chinese people prefer to turn on local news channels on every-day dinner time to know what happened around us and chitchat about current events with family members, than to watch "60 minutes" on CBS. Because as for us, what presented in the latter seems a little bit far away from our common people's life. Apart from this reason, which is more importantly, given some traditional customs, I reckon that sometimes our country-made movies and TV shows are more amusing.There's no substitute for Spring Festival Gala lying in Chinese people's heart. What it means to us is that it's like a national party, people gathering together, laughing at Cross talk show, enjoying fantastic folk dancing and singing. Few can deny that this TV program, on some level, reinforces a country's national cohesion.好句子~例子也很具体

Meanwhile, some foreign movies and TV programs are indeed entertaining as well,（和mean while重复了吧）since they stimulate our interests about their culture, in order to learn distinctions between our ways of expression and forms of thinking. A classic example of this is one of my favorite sitcom "Friends". You might say that it's just a regular comedy, but every time I watch this show, it can always release my stress. Even dramatic as it is, its funny and though-provoking story enables me to realize the crucial importance of true friendship and honest relationship. Besides, some foreign movies and TV programs offer a higher technical level of production, which definitely brings intense visual impact to us, such as 3D movie "Avatar". By that I mean, if such movies and TV programs provide us incredible enjoyment while expanding our outlooks, why not go and watch them?

Overall, we can safely conclude that as long as movies and TV programs are beneficial to our mental and emotional delightfulness, we are all supposed to give it a shot.
LZ的例子非常具体，缺点，个人认为哦，表达有的时候不是特别流畅，读着有点别扭但是明白你的意思。望LZ尽快回拍，谢谢！

yylbjUID：2764695

同学，一个组的你也看的太晚了吧·······

好吧那就这样UID：2846511

抱歉，晚了好久啊
这篇写得我好痛苦啊，断断续续，到后面都不知道些什么了
望被痛批！！！把我批醒咯！！！

anitaxjaUID：2758421

嘿嘿 我也下载来看看~~~

tautou-fanUID：2510013

你好，修改在此

萌仔UID：2722956

8月12日交   09.08.01NA
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? If you do not make sure other people (especially influential people or your employers) know about your strengths and accomplishments, you will never get successful in life

We are now live in an age when the "jungle law" and the "survival of the fittest" rule prevail. Despite that individuals display their unique talents for archiveing their specific goals, it's clear that success is the same destination. However, it seems like a trend that people who are confronted with various of competitions are more likely to equate influential people's support with getting successful easily, which I affirmatively disagree with it.

Granted, if your potential and abilities can be discovered and praised by some remarkable person(people), it will definitely stimulate your aggressiveness and innovation on career as well as afford you more opportunities, such as a desirable promotion. But it's not the only gate to success.

Not surprisingly, the more competitions you face, the much stronger you are supposed to be. By that I mean, even though you are devoted to work or employers know about your strengths, but bear in mind that there are always adversities in every corner of your pursueing process (这句好绕啊，我晕了).Willpower and confidence are the indispensable ingredients of overcoming any setbacks. This point can be confirmed by a classic example of Oprah Winfrey's rags-to-riches story. Few can deny that she's an incredible woman with unbelievable talents on media field. The truth is the woman I admire most had an unfortunate childhood and a humble beginning of her career, but these never stop her holding fast to her dream. Her extremely hard-working and tenacity make her success in the end. Now she owns a household talking show, getting people to talk about their lives and give them hope to live.

Besides, it is generally accepted that a good judge of talent plays an essential role in one's life.He or she may help you achieve a sense of superiority than other mediocres. But at the mean time, you probably become more susceptible to more or less criticisms from him/her. Simply stated, adhering to your judgement instead of following others' advices is a main driving force behind being established person. It has been proved to be right several times in hstory. For example, Rose Frantzen, a renowned comtemporary Amercian artist, who’s got a very unusal style in her paintings. In her early age as a student of art school, she was told by one of her instructors that she was not good at illustraition, so she went into advertising instead. After learning, she found that her honest interest in arts and her work was really good, so she decided to be an artist, finally it turned out to be a right determinaton.（有点偏题，没有弄清你想表达的含义，而且为甚么用这个例子啊，好像与让别人知道自己的strengths和accompments没关系啊）
.Overall, no matter whether your accomplishments have been known by others or not, as long as you rely on your own talents, your own interests, don’t worry, your path will make sense in the end.