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TPO3独立 题目：It is more important to keep your old friends than it is to make new friends.

正文：
Friends are extremely important for one person, and there is an inevitable situation that friends would be different along a person's whole life. Therefore, an controversial argument raises that whether old friends or new friends are more important. In my opinion, the new friends are more important than old friends, though I admit that old friends are also unforgotten.
The old friend just like a sweet wine, the longer it preserved, the more delicious it is, they know your personal idiosynchracies, and make you happy easily. However, one person would grow up, and go to other places for new life, at different phrase, people always meets different friends. New friends is always suitable for your current career, new friends will give you some supports, even some kind of instruction. Just take Mr. Wang, my neighbor for instance, he is a sociable and courteous person, and he always could make new friends in new circumstance. When he got a new job to a new city, everything was so hard for him initially. However, something was changing when he made some new friends. Not only did they help him rent new flat, buy a new car and so on, but also they provided the new company's work instruction. What a fortune he made so many kind new friends. And I probably do not think his old friends could give any really useful help.
In addition, new friends could broad your outlook, as you and your old friends has known each other deeply, generally speaking, there is not so many new things or thoughts to share. I think it is a happy thing to share new thoughts or experiences with others, new friends could tell you what he/she experienced and his/her views of something. It could enrich your life.
Lastly, generally speaking, old friends always live in your old places, such as hometown, while new friends always live close to your present resident, then new friends always close to your daily life. It's very convenient for you to have fun together. It’s a big advantage in comparison with old friends. For example, in weekend, you just need a call for your new friends, and then you could have a fun and cozy happy weekend.
To sum, although old friends are important, the new friends are more suitable for your current lives not only benefit for your career, but also joyful for your daily life, thus, my opinion is clear that making new friends are more important.

mpromanusUID：2565872

It is more important to keep your old friends than it is to make new friends.

Friends are extremely important for a person, and there is an inevitable situation that friends would be different through a person's whole life. Therefore, an controversial argument raises ('raise' is a vt, and 'rise' is a vi. They have similar meanings but completely different usage. Please consult a dictionary if you are not sure.) that whether old friends or new friends are more important. In my opinion, the new friends are more important than old friends, though I admit that old friends are also unforgotten.

A old friend is just like a sweet wine, the longer it is preserved, the more delicious it is. They know your personal idiosynchracies, and easily make you happy easily. However, a person would grow up, and go to other places for a new life[color=red; at different phrase, (Do you mean 'phases'?) people always meets different friends. New friends are always suitable for your current career; new friends will give you some supports, even some kind of instructions. Just take Mr. Wang, my neighbour, for instance: he is a sociable and courteous person, and he could always could make new friends in new circumstances. When he got a new job in a new city, everything was so hard for him initially. However, something was changing when he made some new friends. Not only did they help him rent a new flat, buy a new car and so on, but also they provided the new company's work instruction. What a fortune he made so many kind new friends. And I probably do not think his old friends could give any really useful help. (I find this logic interestingly skewed. What if one of his old friends happened to have worked in that company in that city before? Are you assuming that only his new friends know about the city, the company and his new job, because, well, you were trying to fit your example into your point, rather than to illustrate your point with your example? Think about it.)

In addition, new friends could broaden your outlook. As you and your old friends have known each other deeply, generally speaking, there is not so many new things or thoughts to share. I think it is a happy thing to share new thoughts or experiences with others, new friends could tell you what he/she experienced and his/her views of something. It could enrich your life. (Again, this is interestingly skewed. You can have old friends who have gone abroad for very long and come back anew to tell you about their experiences – would you conclude that this won't broaden your outlook? I think you're really trying very hard to say things in the way you want them to appear and not thinking enough about how exactly the logic works in the example. Of course, you said 'generally', which is rather safe, but still I'd like you to think about how your points can be refuted.)

Lastly, generally speaking, old friends always live in your old places, such as your hometown, while new friends always live close to your present residence, then new friends are always closer to your daily life. (Now this is really getting strenuous. Why would you make such sweeping assumptions about how your old and new friends will stay where they are, and you are the only person who changes residence? ^_^ Think about it.) It's very convenient for you to have fun together. It’s a big advantage in comparison with old friends. For example, in the weekend, you just need a call for your new friends, and then you could have a fun and cozy, happy weekend.

To sum up, although old friends are important, the new friends are more suitable for your current lives (This means you have more lives than your 'current one'..I think you really meant to say 'current living environment/circumstances'.) not only benefit for your career (This is a dangling phrase. It doesn't have a subject, doesn't have a verb, and isn't separated from the previous sentence 'new friends are more suitable for your current …'), but also joyful for your daily life. Thus, my opinion is clear that making new friends are more important. (Right, but that's really not the point you've been trying to bring forward. What you've been discussing is 'new friends are better and more useful than old friends', not 'making new friends is more important than keeping old ones' – you can, of course, infer that making new friends is more important because new friends are better and more useful, but you need to explicitly state this relationship in the introduction, before you can turn the topic into what you've done here.)

总结：

词汇很好，语法请注意单复数和run-on sentence – 你有很多用了逗号的地方都不应该用逗号，应该分句。。请注意标点符号为红色的地方~

论述上属于典型的好坏型偏题 – 问题问的不完全是新朋友和旧朋友哪个好，而是保持跟哪个的关系比较重要。。你当然可以说：因为新朋友比旧朋友好，所以保持和新朋友的关系比较重要。。但是这句话必须出现在第一段然后你才能接着哪个好哪个坏这样比较下去。。不要指望考官会去领会你的精神，你要把所有的逻辑发展摆出来给他看:)

猛龙过江UID：3220220

mpromanus 发表于 2012-6-28 06:52
It is more important to keep your old friends than it is to make new friends.

Friends are extreme ...

猛谢，改的真好~