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[备考小组] 14 年秋季提纲互改小组-issue 74 [复制链接]

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寄托兑换店纪念章 US-applicant 19周年勋章

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发表于 2014-10-16 23:16:29 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
本帖最后由 tesolchina 于 2014-10-21 17:51 编辑
本帖来自"王老师GRE提纲+全文互改小组",欢迎关注!你还可以查看更多小组创建小组
74) Knowing about the past cannot help people to make important decisions today.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

相关题目包括: 57\133\134 其实还是不太一样的

请回帖时按照这里的指引列出英语提纲并用汉语解释并根据指引点评楼上的提纲。 第一个回帖的同学不必点评


这道题我有一个自认为十分巧妙的思路。不过为了留给组员独立思考的空间,我把提纲放在我的博客帖的42楼。

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沙发
发表于 2014-10-20 21:36:40 |只看该作者
前辈,我有个问题想请教:咱们都知道背范文是提高作文成绩的一条非常好的途径。可是让我背住一段英文很困难,感觉读了很多遍还是记不住,一篇不到200字的段落要背1个小时才能大致背下来,而且还很不熟练,等到第二天就忘干净了。前辈有什么背诵的好方法没有?望指教。

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板凳
发表于 2014-10-20 22:03:42 |只看该作者
74) Knowing about the past cannot help people to make important decisions today.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

With the development of technology and science, some people believe that they can make important decisions today without the help of knowing about the past. Indeed, I oppose such view above; because, there is no particular environment, back ground or context for such abstract opinion that most of people cannot have a clear understanding of it.  For discussing this opinion, first, I need to emphasize the importance and necessary of the past and knowing about it; second I will distinguish what kind of important decision needs the help from knowing about the past, and which do not need.  

主题句1) Just as a proverb saying there is nothing new under the sun, it is impossible or even ridiculous to cut off the collection between the past and today. In some degree we can see today as the heritage of the past. That means more or less, everything we facing current have relation with past time, or we can say that the past of course should have some effects on today, which may be positive or negative. In sum, in my opinion, it is wrong to ignore the role of the past, no matter in anything; everything in the world today has to live in the shadow of the past. So in the issue above, the problem now becomes in what situation the past can have significant positive effect on important decision today, which one has bad or futile influence. 说明过去对于现在来说很重要,无论如何都会影响到现在,而且要在不同的环境下分析其作用。

主题句2)Let us see the situation of positive effect on decision today firstly. In job hunting for example, individual resume can be seen as the most important role in HR. in some degree, your resume is the record of your doing and achievement in the past. Before interview, HR needs to browse every resumes in order to have a general understanding of interviewers. Indeed the decision of which people can get the opportunity of interview has direct relation with the quality of their resumes, in other words, by their past. Imaging another example, banks always tend to afford loan to such companies who has a good record of credit. If some people have bad record of credit in the past it is very difficult to get loan from bank in today or future. Form the two examples above we can see the necessary of knowing the past about making the important decision today. 举找工作和银行贷款的例子,表明过去的经历和信用对现在的决策非常重要,会有积极地作用。  

主题句3)Of course, in some other aspects emphasizing the past experience or record will have futile influence for decision today. Weather report is vivid example I think. Although we cannot deny the direct relation between the past and today in the phenomenon of meteorology, every person will see the newest report in the morning not yesterday when they want to walk in the street park. In daily life, when you come to a new environment, your current behaviors and words make up others’ mind of what kinds person you are and to make friends with you or not. These decisions of others are crucial for you, because this decide you can establish a harmonious relation with others or not.举例天气预报和来到新地方的表现,表明有些决定的做出需要最新的信息,并不过分依赖以前的record。

In sum, in any field the past always has relation with today and some important decision must rely on knowing the past. However, in some special case, it is not easy to distinguish which decision is important and which is not, because of this we have to analyze case by case. Indeed, the newest information also play an important role in making decision in some area. 总结全文  

谈一下自己的思路吧,我觉得这个题比较难,因为要分很多种情况来讨论。首先题目有两个点,一是参照过去,二是有利于做出重要决定。如果分情况讨论的话,可以说,1)不参照过去是否有利于做重要决定,2)参照过去是否有利于重要决定,3)到底什么样的决定是重要的决定。

事实上我的文章里没有讨论第3点,因为这一点太难说了,所以我就强调了一下过去对于现在的重要性,把这个内容放在第一段当一个铺垫,然后第二段说第二点。第三段说第一点。

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寄托兑换店纪念章 US-applicant 19周年勋章

地板
发表于 2014-10-20 23:38:10 |只看该作者
liliudodo 发表于 2014-10-20 22:03
74) Knowing about the past cannot help people to make important decisions today.

Write a response ...


74) Knowing about the past cannot help people to make important decisions today.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

With the development of technology and science, some people believe that they can make important decisions today without the help of knowing about the past. Indeed, I oppose such view above; because, there is no particular environment, back ground or context for such abstract opinion that most of people cannot have a clear understanding of it.  For discussing this opinion, first, I need to emphasize the importance and necessary of the past and knowing about it; second I will distinguish what kind of important decision needs the help from knowing about the past, and which do not need.

你的主旨句 I oppose such view above; because, there is no particular environment, back ground or context for such abstract opinion that most of people cannot have a clear understanding of it. 并没有正面提出自己的观点
只说你反对 你需要正面的提出一个复杂的观点

另外 最后一句你说你要先强调什么 再区分什么 这些还是没有说明你的观点到底是什么 结果就是看完整个开头段还是不知道你的观点是什么

你下面的讨论没有具体的例子 都是空对空的讨论 我在楼上已经写了一个思路 从几个具体的问题来谈
建议你不要写全文了 完全是浪费时间 先老老实实的写英语提纲和汉语展开 把思路搞清楚再写全文

主题句1) Just as a proverb saying there is nothing new under the sun, it is impossible or even ridiculous to cut off the collection between the past and today. In some degree we can see today as the heritage of the past. That means more or less, everything we facing current have relation with past time, or we can say that the past of course should have some effects on today, which may be positive or negative. In sum, in my opinion, it is wrong to ignore the role of the past, no matter in anything; everything in the world today has to live in the shadow of the past. So in the issue above, the problem now becomes in what situation the past can have significant positive effect on important decision today, which one has bad or futile influence. 说明过去对于现在来说很重要,无论如何都会影响到现在,而且要在不同的环境下分析其作用。

主题句2)Let us see the situation of positive effect on decision today firstly. In job hunting for example, individual resume can be seen as the most important role in HR. in some degree, your resume is the record of your doing and achievement in the past. Before interview, HR needs to browse every resumes in order to have a general understanding of interviewers. Indeed the decision of which people can get the opportunity of interview has direct relation with the quality of their resumes, in other words, by their past. Imaging another example, banks always tend to afford loan to such companies who has a good record of credit. If some people have bad record of credit in the past it is very difficult to get loan from bank in today or future. Form the two examples above we can see the necessary of knowing the past about making the important decision today. 举找工作和银行贷款的例子,表明过去的经历和信用对现在的决策非常重要,会有积极地作用。

主题句3)Of course, in some other aspects emphasizing the past experience or record will have futile influence for decision today. Weather report is vivid example I think. Although we cannot deny the direct relation between the past and today in the phenomenon of meteorology, every person will see the newest report in the morning not yesterday when they want to walk in the street park. In daily life, when you come to a new environment, your current behaviors and words make up others’ mind of what kinds person you are and to make friends with you or not. These decisions of others are crucial for you, because this decide you can establish a harmonious relation with others or not.举例天气预报和来到新地方的表现,表明有些决定的做出需要最新的信息,并不过分依赖以前的record。

In sum, in any field the past always has relation with today and some important decision must rely on knowing the past. However, in some special case, it is not easy to distinguish which decision is important and which is not, because of this we have to analyze case by case. Indeed, the newest information also play an important role in making decision in some area. 总结全文

谈一下自己的思路吧,我觉得这个题比较难,因为要分很多种情况来讨论。首先题目有两个点,一是参照过去,二是有利于做出重要决定。如果分情况讨论的话,可以说,1)不参照过去是否有利于做重要决定,2)参照过去是否有利于重要决定,3)到底什么样的决定是重要的决定。

事实上我的文章里没有讨论第3点,因为这一点太难说了,所以我就强调了一下过去对于现在的重要性,把这个内容放在第一段当一个铺垫,然后第二段说第二点。第三段说第一点。

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发表于 2014-10-22 15:57:37 |只看该作者
本帖最后由 raikkonen36 于 2014-10-22 16:34 编辑

When people need to make important decisions today, it seems that knowing about the past cannot provide assistance. However, in fact, learning about the past always plays a significant role on that occasion.


第一段:说明it appears that learning about the past cannot bring instructions for people to make important decisions today. That is because social progress has brought a sea change in our living environment. Due to such change in environment, past theory and experience may be not suitable today. 举例,在政治领域,即使你知道一位君主如何在某些时候应该做出什么决定,可惜现在你几乎不可能成为君主,何况做决定呢。

第二段:说明 nonetheless, past theory and experience can still provide reference for people to make important decisions. While the environment where past theory and experience established may not be equally same with present environment, people can still find similarities between them. Based on the similarities, people can employ past theory and experience when facing making decisions. 举例,2008年金融危机后,奥巴马政府的救市方案参考了罗斯福新政,新政的产生发生在1929年的大萧条后。

第三段,说明moreover, ancestors’ understanding of substance essence always contributes to making decisions for nowadays’ people. While human beings live in a changing environment, general laws of substance is eternal.举例:亚当斯密认为竞争商品经济的基础,这个认识今天仍然适用,各个国家制定了一系列的法律来保证商品经济的公平竞争的环境。在政治领域,国家领导人应该有代表广大人民的意见,因此,大多数国家都是通过选举来产生领导人。

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寄托兑换店纪念章 US-applicant 19周年勋章

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发表于 2014-10-23 00:18:02 |只看该作者
raikkonen36 发表于 2014-10-22 15:57
When people need to make important decisions today, it seems that knowing about the past cannot prov ...

74) Knowing about the past cannot help people to make important decisions today.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.



When people need to make important decisions today, it seems that knowing about the past cannot provide assistance. However, in fact, learning about the past always plays a significant role on that occasion.

请有空看看我的1+3模型
1+3 模型及issue超级入口

https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1777364-1-1.html

如何实现well focused and well organized

https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mod=viewthread&tid=1780115

主旨句要分几部分和主题句一一呼应


第一段:说明it appears that learning about the past cannot bring instructions for people to make important decisions today. That is because social progress has brought a sea change in our living environment. Due to such change in environment, past theory and experience may be not suitable today. 举例,在政治领域,即使你知道一位君主如何在某些时候应该做出什么决定,可惜现在你几乎不可能成为君主,何况做决定呢。

你这里的主题句过于 general 几乎将题目的命题全盘否定了
或许你可以说在某些新兴的领域 过去的经验没有用
而你这个例子 也不太合适  


第二段:说明 nonetheless, past theory and experience can still provide reference for people to make important decisions. While the environment where past theory and experience established may not be equally same with present environment, people can still find similarities between them. Based on the similarities, people can employ past theory and experience when facing making decisions. 举例,2008年金融危机后,奥巴马政府的救市方案参考了罗斯福新政,新政的产生发生在1929年的大萧条后。

这里也是一个很经典的问题 上一段刚否定了过去的意义 这一段又说有意义
这样写是很难自圆其说的  
当然这段话本身的内容和例子都还不错


第三段,说明moreover, ancestors’ understanding of substance essence always contributes to making decisions for nowadays’ people. While human beings live in a changing environment, general laws of substance is eternal.举例:亚当斯密认为竞争商品经济的基础,这个认识今天仍然适用,各个国家制定了一系列的法律来保证商品经济的公平竞争的环境。在政治领域,国家领导人应该有代表广大人民的意见,因此,大多数国家都是通过选举来产生领导人。

不太明白你写的英语 substance essence 是什么意思
你似乎想说 有些理论或者规律是恒古不变的  
但是像Smith的很多理论 虽然有用 但是不能算 Knowing about the past

总的来说 你需要重新考虑 你的整体观点 做到分论点连贯起来可以形成一个完整的观点  
我推荐你看看我的提纲
可以按这个思路 换别的例子
https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mo ... age=3#pid1778915992  

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发表于 2014-10-24 12:09:48 |只看该作者
tesolchina 发表于 2014-10-23 00:18
74) Knowing about the past cannot help people to make important decisions today.
Write a response ...

谢谢王老师的建议。

While knowing the past seemingly contributes to nothing for people to make important decisions today, it, in fact, is not the case.

我的意思是表面上看去没有帮助,但是实际是有的。我用seems,可能appears 语气强烈了点,换个ostensibly,apparently。


第一段:说明ostensibly, learning about the past cannot bring any instructions for people to make important decisions today. That is because social progress has brought a sea change in our living environment. Due to such change in environment, past theory and experience may be not suitable today. 举例,在最近的一场欧冠联赛上,在历史上利物浦从来没有输过皇马保持全胜,很多人认为,这次依然会是这样,但是事实上却是利物浦输给了皇马。如果这个不是很important的话, 或者这个,中国是个煤炭资源丰富的国家,而且每年都要大量出口,虽然也有少量进口,大家都认为这个趋势会一直下去,但是在2011年,中国却成为了全球第一大煤炭进口国。

第二段:说明 nonetheless, past theory and experience can still provide reference for people to make important decisions. While the environment where past theory and experience established may not be equally same with present environment, people can still find similarities between them. Based on the similarities, people can employ past theory and experience when facing making decisions. 举例,2008年金融危机后,奥巴马政府的救市方案参考了罗斯福新政,新政的产生发生在1929年的大萧条后。

第三段,说明moreover, learning from the past, people can conclude general laws which can still be help of making important decisions. While our living environment has changed, the general laws are eternal. Thus, people still can set through the appearance to the essence and thus master the general laws, which are useful for them to make important decisions. 例如:在政治领域,通过历史了解,国家领导人应该是代表广大人民的意见,因此,大多数国家都是通过选举来产生领导人。在经济领域,通过市场经济历史,得出市场经济只有在公平竞争的环境中,经济才能得到好的发展,因此人们现在仍然在努力的创造这个环境。


那个issue10 我也改了。

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寄托兑换店纪念章 US-applicant 19周年勋章

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发表于 2014-10-24 18:49:20 |只看该作者
raikkonen36 发表于 2014-10-24 12:09
谢谢王老师的建议。

While knowing the past seemingly contributes to nothing for people to make i ...

While knowing the past seemingly contributes to nothing for people to make important decisions today, it, in fact, is not the case.

首先我在你的主旨句里没有看到有层次的观点 建议你再看看 我的1+3模型
详情见这里

https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mo ... amp;fromuid=2191404

我的意思是表面上看去没有帮助,但是实际是有的。我用seems,可能appears 语气强烈了点,换个ostensibly,apparently。


第一段:说明ostensibly, learning about the past cannot bring any instructions for people to make important decisions today. That is because social progress has brought a sea change in our living environment. Due to such change in environment, past theory and experience may be not suitable today. 举例,在最近的一场欧冠联赛上,在历史上利物浦从来没有输过皇马保持全胜,很多人认为,这次依然会是这样,但是事实上却是利物浦输给了皇马。如果这个不是 很important的话, 或者这个,中国是个煤炭资源丰富的国家,而且每年都要大量出口,虽然也有少量进口,大家都认为这个趋势会一直下去,但是在2011年,中国却成为了全球第 一大煤炭进口国。


你的主题句是learning about the past cannot bring any instructions
但是在你的两个例子中都没有make decision 而只是关于make prediction
也就是说你的例子不能支持你的分论点  




第二段:说明 nonetheless, past theory and experience can still provide reference for people to make important decisions. While the environment where past theory and experience established may not be equally same with present environment, people can still find similarities between them. Based on the similarities, people can employ past theory and experience when facing making decisions. 举例,2008年金融危机后,奥巴马政府的救市方案参考了罗斯福新政,新政的产生发生在1929年的大萧条后。


这个点本身可以成立,例子应该也适用,但是还要看你的具体细节如何展开。但是,你这里的分论点和上一段的分论点如何整合在一起呢?上段说因为社会改变,以前的经验没用 这段又说有用 这样就会自相矛盾了



第三段,说明moreover, learning from the past, people can conclude general laws which can still be help of making important decisions. While our living environment has changed, the general laws are eternal. Thus, people still can set through the appearance to the essence and thus master the general laws, which are useful for them to make important decisions. 例如:在政治领域,通过历史了解,国家领导人应该是代表广大人民的意见,因此,大多数国家都是通过选举来产生领导人。在经济领域,通过市场经济历史,得出 市场经济只有在公平竞争的环境中,经济才能得到好的发展,因此人们现在仍然在努力的创造这个环境。

laws或许用principles好些 conclude这个词搭配也有问题
这一段似乎是在理论层面上解释上一段的观点 也就是总有些原理、规律是超越时代的  但是你的举例中并没有提到make decision 又会产生离题的风险

我觉得你的提纲暴露出两个很常见的问题
第一 举例不能切合题目 比如这里的make decision
第二 提出相反的观点却无法自圆其说

对于第一个问题 主要还是在选取例子的时候要弄清楚题目讨论的重点问题是什么
而对于第二个问题 建议按照分类讨论的策略 详情见
https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mo ... amp;fromuid=2191404

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发表于 2014-10-24 22:56:47 |只看该作者
非常感谢王老师一针见血的意见。

While knowing the past seemingly contributes to nothing for people to make important decisions, the past, in fact, can provide reference for people. Moreover, learning from the past, people can even grasp the rules of things, which can be fairly useful for people to make important decisions.


上次的It, in fact, is not the case. 这个我是简写了,把后面两层意思浓缩了下。第二层说了参考价值,第三段有些可能是永恒的。简写好点,还是这样好点,或者你觉得这样也还是没有层次。其实过去一直纠结在素材例子上,其实平时的例子可能也行,对吗?受到语文影响,老是想着比较大的。



第一段:说明ostensibly, learning about the past cannot bring any instructions for people to make important decisions today. That is because social progress has brought a sea change in our living environment. Due to such change, it always seems to be no relationship between the past and the present. 例如,当我们现在去商场挑选智能手机时,哪款手机好呢? 当科学家想要发射探测器去火星探索时,什么时候发射合适呢? 当一名学生想要用电子邮件去联系导师申请时,什么时候联系比较好呢? 因为,智能手机,火星探测器,和电子邮件都是在最近才出现的,过去都没有,如何谈帮助他们做决定呢?


第二段:说明 While the past environment may not be equally same with present environment, knowing about the past, people still can set through the appearance to the essence. As such, based on the similarities between the past and the present, the past can always provide reference for people to make important decisions. 举例,2008年金融危机后,奥巴马政府的救市方案参考了罗斯福新政,新政的产生发生在1929年的大萧条后。

第三段,说明moreover, learning from the past, people even master the rule of things, which can be of help for people to make important decisions. While our living environment has changed, the rules are eternal. 例如:0和游戏,为了维持可持续发展,当政府面在经济发展和保护环境做决策时;一个企业面临在追求利益和社会责任时做决策时;个人面临在工作和家庭如何安排自己的时间时。这个规则告诉我们,应该平衡发展。


这两天一直纠结在整体性,不知道这个有没有解决。

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寄托兑换店纪念章 US-applicant 19周年勋章

10
发表于 2014-10-25 23:43:31 |只看该作者
raikkonen36 发表于 2014-10-24 22:56
非常感谢王老师一针见血的意见。

While knowing the past seemingly contributes to nothing for people ...

非常感谢王老师一针见血的意见。

While knowing the past seemingly contributes to nothing for people to make important decisions, the past, in fact, can provide reference for people. Moreover, learning from the past, people can even grasp the rules of things, which can be fairly useful for people to make important decisions.


上次的It, in fact, is not the case. 这个我是简写了,把后面两层意思浓缩了下。第二层说了参考价值,第三段有些可能是永恒的。简写好点,还是这样好点,或者你觉得这样也还是没有层次。其实过 去一直纠结在素材例子上,其实平时的例子可能也行,对吗?受到语文影响,老是想着比较大的。


是的 日常生活的例子 其实很好  可以看看我考试时写的issue 89
你目前这个主旨句已经开始有层次了 但是你这里说的表面上看起来和实际上如何,这个很难界定
出于文章连贯性的考虑 最好第一段和第二段用同样的例子  当然这是最好如此
我觉得你第一段用的例子不是很合适  挑手机肯定要看这个品牌过去的表现 套磁时间也可以请教过来人
past未必是指很久以前 上个月或者去年也是past 其实这就是这道题比其他历史题好写的地方  

第二段的例子看起来还不错 但是我不确定你有足够的资料和语言能力写好
第三段 你举的例子里哪里有learn from the past  

我一般鼓励学生想自己的观点 列自己的提纲 但是看你写的这个提纲 改了又改还是不行 实在应该参考一下比较成熟的提纲   https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mo ... age=3#pid1778915992


Thesis: I strongly disagree with the statement that information about the past cannot help people make decisions today. In fact, we rely on information about past to make decisions all the time in different fields such as graduate school admission, bank loan application and employment.  

TS1 In graduate school admission, GPA annd past research experiences are the two most important factor because such information about the applicants' past can help admission officers to predict the applicants' future success.

TS2 When banks evaluate the application for loan, the bank officers will examine the credit history of the individuals to make decisions

TS3 The choosing job candidates for certain positions, the employers will check and see if the candidates have criminal records suggesting that they had committed crimes in the past.  



第一段:说明ostensibly, learning about the past cannot bring any instructions for people to make important decisions today. That is because social progress has brought a sea change in our living environment. Due to such change, it always seems to be no relationship between the past and the present. 例如,当我们现在去商场挑选智能手机时,哪款手机好呢? 当科学家想要发射探测器去火星探索时,什么时候发射合适呢? 当一名学生想要用电子邮件去联系导师申请时,什么时候联系比较好呢? 因为,智能手机,火星探测器,和电子邮件都是在最近才出现的,过去都没有,如何谈帮助他们做决定呢?


第二段:说明 While the past environment may not be equally same with present environment, knowing about the past, people still can set through the appearance to the essence. As such, based on the similarities between the past and the present, the past can always provide reference for people to make important decisions. 举例,2008年金融危机后,奥巴马政府的救市方案参考了罗斯福新政,新政的产生发生在1929年的大萧条后。

第三段,说明moreover, learning from the past, people even master the rule of things, which can be of help for people to make important decisions. While our living environment has changed, the rules are eternal. 例如:0和游戏,为了维持可持续发展,当政府面在经济发展和保护环境做决策时;一个企业面临在追求利益和社会责任时做决策时;个人面临在工作和家庭如何安 排自己的时间时。这个规则告诉我们,应该平衡发展。


这两天一直纠结在整体性,不知道这个有没有解决。

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发表于 2014-10-27 10:15:58 |只看该作者
134和74差不多,所以也发在这里
134 Claim: Knowing about the past cannot help people to make important decisions today.
Reason: We are not able to make connections between current events and past events until we have some distance from both.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.

In my opinion, whether the claim is true or not depends on specific situations. Knowing about the past can help people to make important decisions today in politics and economics, but it does not work in science and technology situations. I disagree with the reason because the connection between today’s events and past events are easy to be made as long as there are some similar characteristics between them.
In politics, knowing about the past helps leaders to make decisions because the history can help people learn experience in the past events.政治上的情形往往在历史上或者其他国家有相似情况,可以借鉴历史经验或者其他国家的经验。举例:美国罗斯福新政为后面美国总统缓解经济危机提供经验借鉴。
In economics, knowing about the past helps people to make decisions because economists can discover some laws of economic development according to the past economic events.经济周期往往较长,只有观察过去的经济情况,才能发现经济发展规律。经济发展规律让人们知晓每个决策可能带来的影响,从而帮助人们做出决策。举例:计量经济学中GARCH模型帮助经济学家借助过去的数据预测未来的发展趋势。
In science and technology situations, the claim does not hold true because science and technology is developing rapidly and most problems never happened in the past.科技发展迅速,过去没有出现过类似问题,难以从过去的事件中借鉴经验。举例:环境问题,转基因问题
I disagree with the reason because the connection between today’s events and past events are easy to be made as long as there are some similar characteristics between them. 两个事件的联系可以从事件发生的背景、环境、发展过程、问题严重程度等方面的共同点建立,不需要在有较大时间间隔之后才能建立联系。举例:经济危机的发生。

问题:Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.这种题型,在讨论reason时除了讨论reason这个观点是否成立之外,需要讨论reason能否论证claim吗?
如果需要,那么用讨论claim,讨论reason本身,讨论reason能否论证claim这三段展开可以吗?

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寄托兑换店纪念章 US-applicant 19周年勋章

12
发表于 2014-10-28 10:14:56 |只看该作者

ClaretZ 134提纲点评

ClaretZ 发表于 2014-10-27 10:15
134和74差不多,所以也发在这里
134 Claim: Knowing about the past cannot help people to make importan ...




134和74差不多,所以也发在这里
134 Claim: Knowing about the past cannot help people to make important decisions today.
Reason: We are not able to make connections between current events and past events until we have some distance from both.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.

In my opinion, whether the claim is true or not depends on specific situations. Knowing about the past can help people to make important decisions today in politics and economics, but it does not work in science and technology situations. I disagree with the reason because the connection between today’s events and past events are easy to be made as long as there are some similar characteristics between them.

各分论点都可以成立 如果你不同意reason的话 建议先说 然后再分几个方面讨论  这样后面的讨论还可以回应前面不同意reason


In politics, knowing about the past helps leaders to make decisions because the history can help people learn experience in the past events.政治上的情形往往在历史上或者其他国家有相似情况,可以借鉴历史经验或者其他国家的经验。举例:美国罗斯福新政为后面美国总统缓解经济危机提供经验借鉴。




In economics, knowing about the past helps people to make decisions because economists can discover some laws of economic development according to the past economic events.经济周期往往较长,只有观察过去的经济情况,才能发现经济发展规律。经济发展规律让人们知晓每个决策可能带来的影响,从而帮助人们做出决策。举例:计量经济学中GARCH模型帮助经济学家借助过去的数据预测未来的发展趋势。


In science and technology situations, the claim does not hold true because science and technology is developing rapidly and most problems never happened in the past.科技发展迅速,过去没有出现过类似问题,难以从过去的事件中借鉴经验。举例:环境问题,转基因问题


I disagree with the reason because the connection between today’s events and past events are easy to be made as long as there are some similar characteristics between them. 两个事件的联系可以从事件发生的背景、环境、发展过程、问题严重程度等方面的共同点建立,不需要在有较大时间间隔之后才能建立联系。举例:经济危机的发生。






问题:Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.这种题型,在讨论reason时除了讨论reason这个观点是否成立之外,需要讨论reason能否论证claim吗?
如果需要,那么用讨论claim,讨论reason本身,讨论reason能否论证claim这三段展开可以吗?

我建议将reason和claim当做一个整体来讨论 也就是说 把这类题看成
Because + reason, claim这样一个句子 然后分不同情况讨论这个句子是否成立  
如果一定要分开 建议先写一段讲同意或不同意reason 然后再分情况讨论

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美版2016offer达人

13
发表于 2014-10-31 00:01:13 |只看该作者
本帖最后由 max940623 于 2014-10-31 00:02 编辑

老师求改:lol
KW: past, make decisions, today

V1
TS: Generally speaking, understanding about history could assists the mankind to compare the present and predict the future, therefore history always acts as an important reference for human to make decisions. Admittedly, in some fields the short history fails to enlighten us. But in most cases, history is long enough for normal people to grasp and utilize the universal rule behind. In fact, except decision-making, learning history could contribute more to the society.

ts1 反面的情况 历史过短
In certain fields like smartphone industry, the history could be useless or even harmful for the decision-making. 举例,诺基亚身为曾经的手机业霸主,基于对短暂历史的认知,放弃塞班系统后选择了错误的平台WP,输给苹果与安卓。
However, the similar situation occurs because the limited history in this field suggest the short-term experience instead of the universal rule behind. 因为历史不够长,一段时间内的随机性经验不构成普遍规律不能应用到任何时间,所以参照历史不具备价值

ts2 历史足够长
On the contrary, the short-term uncertainty mentioned above will be eliminated when a long history is assessable. In this sense, people could extract the theorem that could apply at any time from history. 举例,就用大家都喜欢的奥观海参考罗斯福新政救市吧,因为市场经济的参照历史长,能揭示凯恩斯主义这一正确且适用于任何年代的定理

ts3历史的其他作用
Besides decision making, history could also support the human to conduct self-orientation and transposition consideration. 历史除了揭示规律,还能让人学会自我定位和换位思考。

这题本来想写成ts1和ts2是论述参考历史对凡人做决定的作用(不能改变历史规律的统称凡人)
Ts3写那些颠覆历史的伟人也应该在决定前先参考之前的历史。举例贝多芬创建浪漫派其实也吸收了很多古典派的精华
但是操作难度有点大。。。不知道老师您觉得那种好一些

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发表于 2014-10-31 04:31:45 |只看该作者
根据王老师的建议,issue之处女作,求狠拍!:lol

首段:
I totally disagree with the author on claim that making important decisions today cannot benefit from knowing about the past.Actually,we rely heavily on information about the past to make decisions in different fields such as health care systems,bank loan application and graduate college admission.

BOBY:
The past information of health care systems is very significant to every one,every doctor and every country that people can make good decisions.For personal health,people always trust doctor who acquaints their medical history more than the new one.So many family doctors are very popular in American.The family doctor will be good at preventing disease than a strange one.Because they know which kind of medicine and what kind of curing that is the best for different type of people.  For doctors,they face a serious problem every times that when people bring their hope come to you ,they want be cured soon,they want be saved no risk.Doctors have to read patient’s case history to make a series of decisions for curing scheme as it will be avoid any risk for their patients.The sense of responsibility lead doctors will be very carefully to make decisions for patients.For example, if person alert about one of medicine,but the doctor who didn’t know his/her case history,it will be harmful to the person even kill him/her.For countries,wherever you are, health care is a significant factor to a country in anytime.The government depends on health care systems to control in spreading of the infectious diseases when this diseases will bring a disaster such as SARS, Aids and flu. Therefore knowing the past will help you to make important decisions today.



The back ground check also is the necessary part in bank loan application that they can make right decisions.As we know that the bank loan follow with hiding risk at all time.How can we evade or reduce the risk?From abundant experience and long term investigation, we know that evaluating the application of the loan by following factors: check the history of credit record,the the stability of job incomes, the number of the permanent asserts ,the risk about the investment item.In fact, people have a good history on those factors that they can complete the loan transaction in time better than who have a bad history about the past.Thus it can be seen that the past detailed background check for bank loan that it can be conducive to make right decisions.



Likewise the GPA and past research paper play important roles in the graduate college admission to make decisions not only for schools but also for students.In one respect,however, a clear  line of the GPA and a specific request for the past research will pass some students who cannot meet the requirement.Schools could refuse some students they don’t want.On the other hand,students can choose school depend on the past criteria whether or not to be admitted into school.This win-win way not only save the human resources to the school admission department but also save the application fee for the student to satisfy both sides.Hence one can see that the past information is contribute to make win-win decisions sometimes.


结尾:
To sum up,From what have been discussed above we may finally conclusion that knowing the information about past is very helpful to make right decisions.Although we are live in high technology times,people always focus on present and future,the past still be worthy of paying a attention when you make a important decision.

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寄托兑换店纪念章 US-applicant 19周年勋章

15
发表于 2014-10-31 10:25:08 |只看该作者
chenboyuan 发表于 2014-10-31 04:31
根据王老师的建议,issue之处女作,求狠拍!

首段:

I totally disagree with the author on claim that making important decisions today cannot benefit from knowing about the past.Actually,we rely heavily on information about the past to make decisions in different fields such as health care systems,bank loan application and graduate college admission.

首先,恭喜你写出了一篇issue全文!由于这个思路是我提供的,当然在我看来是brilliant的 (O(∩_∩)O哈哈~)
其实我还是很鼓励大家在练习的初期多借鉴现成的思路和提纲
只要用自己的语言来表述就好了

就你的中间段展开来看 一个基本的问题是句子太多  我们一般主张中间段的篇幅不超过6句。
你的第一个中间段却写了11句 额滴神啊
下面我来写一个汉语的展开 你试下重新写这一段  

In the field of health care, both doctors and patients rely on information from the past to make important decisions.
先讲医生给病人看病时会参考病人以前的病史。
比如,如果病人以前曾经对头孢过敏,医生就会避免使用这类药物。
而病人在选择医生的时候,往往也会考虑这个医生之前的表现。如果这个医生上次治好了自己的病、并提供了很好的服务,病人会根据上次的经验,再次选择。相反,如果上次这个医生帮助不大,这次就可能会换人。
有这两个例子可以看出医生和病人在做决定的时候都会考虑过去发生的事情。

下面的我先不看了
你试下用英语写这段话


BOBY:
1 The past information of health care systems is very significant to every one,every doctor and every country that people can make good decisions.2 For personal health,people always trust doctor who acquaints their medical history more than the new one. 3 So many family doctors are very popular in American.The family doctor will be good at preventing disease than a strange one. 4 Because they know which kind of medicine and what kind of curing that is the best for different type of people. 5  For doctors,they face a serious problem every times that when people bring their hope come to you ,they want be cured soon,they want be saved no risk. 6 Doctors have to read patient’s case history to make a series of decisions for curing scheme as it will be avoid any risk for their patients.7 The sense of responsibility lead doctors will be very carefully to make decisions for patients. 8 For example, if person alert about one of medicine,but the doctor who didn’t know his/her case history,it will be harmful to the person even kill him/her.9 For countries,wherever you are, health care is a significant factor to a country in anytime. 10 The government depends on health care systems to control in spreading of the infectious diseases when this diseases will bring a disaster such as SARS, Aids and flu. 11 Therefore knowing the past will help you to make important decisions today.

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