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[求助] [写作]官方范文,简简单单得高分? [复制链接]

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2015 US-applicant

发表于 2015-9-1 23:20:07 |显示全部楼层
托福官方满分范文里有一些文章的用词和句式写得非常简单,但是后面的标注都是
This is a 5 point essay

比方说Topic62的第一篇:
Friends are very important in everyone's life. But there are different types of friends: some of them are very intelligent, some have a good sense of humor and some are reliable. What I want most is the friend who has a good sense of humor.

Humor is a very important character of a person, because a person who is humorous can always bring you happiness. I have a friend, who is not very intelligent and reliable, but he is one of my best friends, just because he has a good sense of humor. Whenever you call him, talk with him, he always tells you some funny jokes that make you laughing. Even though you are in a very bad mood, he can make you laugh and forget the sad things. A friend with a good sense of humor is very optimistic; they can make your world full of light.

If a person doesn't have a sense of humor at all, that's really bad. No matter how intelligent he is, no matter how reliable he is, he will never bring you happiness, although he can help you solve a few problems, his world is without laughter. In my class there is a very smart guy, but because of his lack of humor, we don't like to play with him, although it seems that he knows everything.

Friend plays a very significant role in everyone's life. But humor is the most important character in a friend, because humorous friends make you happy and see the world optimistically. They make your world full of hope, and full of laughter.


也许是我功力尚浅看不出来,我感觉本篇逻辑和行文都很简单,字数也才266,和大家分析得高分作文的行文思路也不是特别符合,怎么是满分作文呢?还是我的这个版本是过时的?这里附上。



请各位大牛指教>_<
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IBT Zeal IBT Smart IBT Elegance Capricorn摩羯座 寄托兑换店纪念章 US-applicant 2014去香港 荣誉版主

发表于 2015-9-3 16:17:05 |显示全部楼层
逻辑行文简单但是并不出错,不过这篇是有点太水了,真实评分情况已经水涨船高了很多。。。
ps id和头像好评:lol:

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IBT Zeal 备考先锋 US-applicant

发表于 2015-9-3 23:02:53 |显示全部楼层
这种范文 默默的忽略吧 逻辑不能出错是最基本的写作要求 字数也是关键啊 还记得官方的写作要求吗?不能少于300字!!

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发表于 2015-9-4 20:44:54 |显示全部楼层
我觉得我一战时候跟这个写的差不多,就是把话说清楚,加例子稍例证,作文27= - =也许这样太简单了才没拿到30?

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美国offer勋章 梦舞槿樱 CS offerl勋章

发表于 2017-11-1 04:05:26 |显示全部楼层
这个不是官方范文,是北美范文。是不是真的五分不清楚,我也觉得有点水了

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2015 US-applicant

发表于 2018-2-18 17:37:53 |显示全部楼层
abelwu 发表于 2017-11-1 04:05
这个不是官方范文,是北美范文。是不是真的五分不清楚,我也觉得有点水了

北美范文是说这是北美考场的范文?我看里面好多篇是讲中国的情况,是巧合吗?

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RE: [写作]官方范文,简简单单得高分? [修改]
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[写作]官方范文,简简单单得高分?
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