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[作文] 求批改 [复制链接]

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发表于 2016-10-27 16:24:13 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
求批改以下两篇independent task, 本人因为一战实在是太久以前的事,以目前的水平,不敢求互批,
不过如果有同仁觉得以下作文可以作为互批的,愿意有伙伴一起作战


Do you agree or disagree with the following statement
Working part time is a good way for teenagers to prepare for adult life.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.


Some people think that working part time is not beneficial for teenagers. However, for the following reasons, I strongly believe working part time is a good way for teenagers to prepare for adult life.

First of all, working part time will make teenagers get to know new co-workers in a new working place. Unlike studying in a school, working place is filled with people who are in different age and background. By working part time, the teenagers will have opportunity to meet those people. For example, when I was working in a ra-men shop in my age of sixteen years old, I was introduced to a nicely looking girl to start my first day in the work. She was 3 years older than me and was preparing for a college exam. She taught me not only about how to have a good working performance but also about how to prepare for a dream college which I will face in near future. I am having good relationship until now with the girl. As this example illustrates, working part-time makes teenagers have opportunity to know good co-workers.

In addition, working part time will help teenager to deeply understand the meaning of how income come with effort. In a modern society, thanks to the developing income for most of families, teenagers may take the good life especially financially for granted. By working part-time, teenagers will understand the value of the effort that brings income. For example, I had a hard time memorizing the list of the menu when I was working in a ra-men shop. I also remember, I was always afraid to speak to customers because of my shyness. But the work required me to perform nicely to customer and behave well. I keep memorize the menu even after going back to home and trying best to smile when I got nervous. This example illustrates that working part-time makes teenagers realize that it requires great effort to earn money.

In conclusion, I definitely agree with the idea that working part-time is a good way for teenagers to prepare adult life.


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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The food we ate in the past was healthier than the food we eat today.

Some people think that the food we eat today is healthier than the food we ate in the past. However, I strongly believe that the food we ate in the past is much healthier than nowadays food for the following reasons.

First of all, the food we eat nowadays is polluted in many ways. The development of technology brought convenient lives to modern society; however, it also brought pollution such as chemistry pollution as well as air pollution, which effect and damage the growing crops. For instance, fruit is injected man-made color pigment for better looking in order to attract consumers. There has been news reported regarding an incident happen recently saying the agricultural chemicals caused food poisoning to human. The news also mentioned that polluted food is very harm to young age and old grownups.  Thus, without careful management, food pollution would become a problem for current society. Comparing to the nowadays, the food we ate in the past has much safe because of limited control of man-caused pollution. As this example illustrate, the past food is much healthier than nowadays food.

In addition, comparing to the food in the past, which most contain natural ingredients, nowadays food may only has similar taste to the food people most likely to taste. For example, for people who like to eat lemon, they can easily find lemon-taste cookies, hamburgers, rice so and so on. However, not all of the food contains real lemon because there is easy way to create lemon taste without even using real lemon nowadays. Thus, the original ingredients and nutrition is not able to be guaranteed. As this example illustrates, the food we eat nowadays is much unhealthier than the food we ate in the past.

In conclusion, I definitely agree with the idea that the food we ate in the past is healthier than the food we eat today.




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