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发表于 2017-8-25 16:20:04 |显示全部楼层
31. The following appeared in a letter to the editor of Parson City's local newspaper.

In our region of Trillura, the majority of money spent on the schools that most students attend the city-run public schools comes from taxes that each city government collects. The region's cities differ, however, in the budgetary priority they give to public education. For example, both as a proportion of its overall tax revenues and in absolute terms, Parson City has recently spent almost twice as much per year as Blue City has for its public school-even though both cities have about the same number of residents. Clearly, Parson City residents place a higher value on providing a good education in public schools than Blue City residents do.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

Claim1:Parson City residents place a higher value on providing a good education in public schools than Blue City residents do.

Data:Parson City has recently spent almost twice as much per year as Blue City has for its public school seven though both cities have about the same number of residents.

Warrant:recent records are typical

Evidence: need more records in the past

Claim2:Parson City residents place a higher value on providing a good education in public schools than Blue City residents do.

Data:both as a proportion of its overall tax revenues and in absolute terms, Parson City has recently spent almost twice as much per year as Blue City has for its public school seven though both cities have about the same number of residents.

Warrant:Parson City spends a higher proportion of its overall tax revenues

Evidence: overall tax revenues are nearly equal in both cities and spending per student and spending per teacher are qual

Claim3:Parson City residents place a higher value on providing a good education in public schools than Blue City residents do.

Data:Parson City has recently spent almost twice as much per year as Blue City has for its public school even though both cities have about the same number of residents.

Warrant: the more money you spend, the more value you pay value on education.

Evidence: to what extent the quality of education depends on the amount of money
        - except for the money they from the government, they don’t have other economic support.



INTRO:
In this argument, the author concludes that Parson City residents attach more importance to providing a good education than the residents of Blue City. To justify this conclusion, the author cast light on the evidence that Parson city give more budgetary priority than the other city. It might seem logical at first glance, however, in order to evaluate this letter, we need to have more information about how typical is this record,  whether the total revenue, the number of students is the same, and to what extent the quality of education depends on the amount of money.

TS3:
We also need to collect more information about to what extent the quality of education depends on the amount of money. The author assumes that the money spends on public education, the better quality those public school will have. However, the author fails to provide any evidence that the quality of education is relevant, or only relevant to the amount of money. Maybe the Blue City has enough money already, so they don’t need to spend recently. For instance, they already spend a lot a few years ago to buy some basic tools, and those tools for classes are still using today at a great function, and the Blue City just spend twice of money to buy the tools today. Moreover, even though every time both city spending the same amount of money at the same things, it would be a lot of other elements can influence the quality of education, such as parents participation, the motivation of students and ways to relax after study in high pressure. Be they whether the money is sufficient, or any other elements would affect the quality of education, the money would not be a reason for a better quality of education.

修改
they already spend a lot a few years ago to buy some basic tools, and those tools for classes are still using today at a great function, and the Blue City just spend twice of money to buy the tools today.

SF
they already spend a lot a few years ago to buy some basic tools for classes, which are still using today at a great function, so Parsons City doesn’t need to buy those stuff anymore, while the Blue City just buy the same tools today.
我想说的是:P早就买好了基础设施现在不用投钱了,B现在才开始买。。。但是我老觉得自己没说清楚,有没有哪个小伙伴支支招?
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wanghaitao19939 + 1 虽然我很想帮你 但是我是个弱弱 爱莫能助.

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发表于 2017-8-25 19:56:16 |显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 youzi42 于 2017-8-25 20:26 编辑

Arg 21 Dr. Field anthropologist

10) Twenty years ago, Dr. Field, a noted anthropologist, visited the island of Tertia. Using an observation-centered approach to studying Tertian culture, he concluded from his observations that children in Tertia were reared by an entire village rather than by their own biological parents. Recently another anthropologist, Dr. Karp, visited the group of islands that includes Tertia and used the interview-centered method to study child-rearing practices. In the interviews that Dr. Karp conducted with children living in this group of islands, the children spent much more time talking about their biological parents than about other adults in the village. Dr. Karp decided that Dr. Field's conclusion about Tertian village culture must be invalid. Some anthropologists recommend that to obtain accurate information on Tertian child-rearing practices, future research on the subject should be conducted via the interview-centered method.

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.


Claim: children in Tertia were reared by an entire village rather than by their own biological parents.
Data:   Dr. Field's study about Tertian culture using an observation-centered approach
Warrent: his observation

Claim: children in Tertia were reared by their own biological parents.->Dr. Field's conclusion must be invalid.
Data:   Dr. Karp's visit to group of islands that includes Tertia using interview-centered method
Warrent: children living in this group of islands, the children spent much more time talking about their biological parents than about other adults in the village.

Evidence: The children live with their parents.
Question: Does one taking about parents more mean that one lives with their parents?
Evidence: Between 20 years in those islands, their patten of rising child rarely changed.
Question: Does people who live in those islands share the same method of parenting as that in 20 years ago?

Claim: Some anthropologists recommend that to obtain accurate information on Tertian child-rearing practices, future research on the subject should be conducted via the interview-centered method
Data:   Dr. Field's study vs Dr. Karp's study
Warrent: Dr. Karp claims that Dr. Field's conclusion must be invalid.

Evidence: more viable methods which can be used to measure the phenomena in Tertia
Question:Are there any other compelling method which can be used to measure the phenomena in Tertia

开头:

   When it comes to the evaluation of the best methods in the research of Tertain, Some anthropologists recommend that in order to obtain accurate information in future research, we should be use the interview-centered method. Since the conclusion of the Dr.Karp's research, which was contradicted with that of Dr.Field,using observation-centered approach 20 years ago.Thus, it made the observation-centered approach invalid. However, when judging what's the best method in the research of Tertain practice, we still need to explore more questions. Those questions are mainly concerning with the changes in the islands of Tertain, the validity of the answers given by the Tertain children, and the other viable methods.
    To begin with, the conclusion made by Dr.Karp was 20 years later than that of Dr.Field. Thus, we may question that are there any changes , especially in the raising child practice, may existed. Since 20 years is long enough for a tribe to realize their seemingly not pragmatical practice in child-raising. Or, it may happen if the villagers suddenly decided they wanted their custody back. Thus, we have to reconsider the argument ,given the situation what the two experts saw , was totally different. Moreover, we can't come to an conclusion that the interview-centered method was better, given the two research was not comparable.
    In addition, we can't evaluate both conclusions merely depends on the focus of those Tertian children's answers. Before further assessment, we need to answer the question: does the focus of the talking mean that those children live with their parents? Since there is possibility that their parents, even not lived with their children, visited their children frequently. As we all know, children tend to talk more about novel things. It not the reason that they did not live with other adults so they told less about other adults, but just that their parents seem more unfamiliar to them. If this assumption holds true, then is may suggest that the child still is raised by the whole village. Thus,the outcomes of Dr.Karp seems uncompelling, what's more, we may focus more on the Dr.Field's observation-centered approach.
    However, to judge the two approach, we still need more confirmation. There are only two methods given. Thus, we need to explore the possibility of other situations. Are there any other methods which can explain the practice of the Tertian child-rearing? If there were, then we can't come to an judgment so rashly, given there are uncertainty in the methods. After collecting information that are comprehensive enough, we can make a more accurate decisions on the argument.
    In a word, to assess the argument, concerning the Tertian child-rearing practice, we need further investment in the practice. By conforming the changes of the practice, the validity of the methods and the possibility of other useful methods, then we can make a more disinterested assessment.

关于这个argument:
仔细研读了一下老师的以前的帖子, 发现了自已以前很多的误区。 这次写整篇用了差不多45分钟,不包括写提纲的时间,文章废话可能比较多,需要精简。终于写了一个像样一点的argument了,希望老师看到我以前的文章不要对我失望,写的实在太渣了。我会加油的~

修改自己的开头段
argument 2

A recent study of eighteen rhesus monkeys provides clues as to the effects of birth order on an individual's levels of stimulation.The study showed that in stimulating situations (such as an encounter with an unfamiliar monkey), firstborn infant monkeys produce up to twice as much of the hormone cortisol, which primes the body for increased activity levels, as do their younger siblings. Firstborn humans also produce relatively high levels of cortisol in stimulating situations (such as the return of a parent after an absence).The study also found that during pregnancy, first-time mother monkeys had higher levels of cortisol than did those who had had several offspring.  
Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument.

The role of birth order in an individual's levels of stimulation is explored in a recent study of eighteen rhesus monkeys. The study gave some compelling cases related to birth order, the firstborn usually excrete more hormone cortisol than their less experienced peers. Even though the study is so perfect illustrated, however, in those specific situations, there are some explanations which can be used to explain, as followings.

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发表于 2017-8-25 19:58:29 |显示全部楼层
Arg 31 government spending and residents attitudes on public schools -o
The following appeared in a letter to the editor of Parson City's local newspaper.

In our region of Trillura, the majority of money spent on the schools that most students attend the city-run public schools comes from taxes that each city government collects. The region's cities differ, however, in the budgetary priority they give to public education. For example, both as a proportion of its overall tax revenues and in absolute terms, Parson City has recently spent almost twice as much per year as Blue City has for its public schools even though both cities have about the same number of residents. Clearly, Parson City residents place a higher value on providing a good education in public schools than Blue City residents do.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
开头段:
In the letter, the writer suggests that Parson City’s pays more attention to provide a good education than Blue City, because they give priority to city-run schools by giving them more money from taxes. To support his/her assertion, the writer presents evidence of the proportion of tax incomes and absolute terms, arrives at a conclusion that Parson City has recently paid twice amount of money for its public school per year as Blue City has. Although Parson City may actually places a higher value on good education in public school, close scrutiny reveals that the conclusion lacks critical support and therefore we need more evidence to help evaluate the argument.
中间段:
First of all, we need evidence to verify the proportion of tax revenues in total financial support of the two cities separately. While the writer takes the amount of money as example to show Parson City supports more to its education, no evidence serves to rule out the possibility that private donors in Blue City give more financial assistance to their public school and the total amount of money given to city-run schools of Blue City is much larger than that of Parson City. Thus additional evidence gains great significance to determine whether Parson City has advantage of total support including tax revenues and private donations.
按照老师的意见修改自己作文:
53)The following appeared in a health magazine.
The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. Furthermore, there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol. This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the most healthy citizens regularly eat.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
原文:
To start with, the citizens’ responses to a recent survey show that they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. revise the topic sentence to better summarize the body paragraph  首先要指出我们需要哪方面的证据
修改:
To start with, we need evidence to verify the citizens’ responses to surveys recently as well as their responses to its counterpart ten years ago. While the writer argues that the citizens’ responses to a recent survey show that they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago, no evidence serve to rule out the possibility that there was no such a survey about if the citizens conform to the governmental nutrition suggestions. Thus, additional evidence gains great significance to determine the change is existing.

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发表于 2017-8-25 20:15:17 |显示全部楼层
Arg 31 government spending and residents attitudes on public schools -o

The following appeared in a letter to the editor of Parson City's local newspaper.

In our region of Trillura, the majority of money spent on the schools that most students attend-the city-run public schools-comes from taxes that each city government collects. The region's cities differ, however, in the budgetary priority they give to public education. For example, both as a proportion of its overall tax revenues and in absolute terms, Parson City has recently spent almost twice as much per year as Blue City has for its public schools even though both cities have about the same number of residents. Clearly, Parson City residents place a higher value on providing a good education in public schools than Blue City residents do.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

In the argument, the author argued that Parson City residents place higher level of value on providing good education in public schools than Blue City residents do by providing the evidence that they have a budget priority as they spend more money recently. However, more evidence need to be collected about the average spending on students and schools, the past investment records and future plans the two government have on education and other ways they have done to improve education levels in public schools before we can confidently evaluate the validity of the argument.

Firstly, we need to gather more information about the specific money spending on each school and student in the city respectively. Although as states by the author, the two city share the same residents, it does not necessarily means that they share the same demographic features. There may be possibilities that Blue City has a smaller proportion of students or they have considerably less public schools in the city. Either way will lead to the possibility that the average spending on student or school of Blue city outruns Parson City which further undermines the author's argument that Parson City value education construction more.

Secondly, more details need to be collected about the past investment record and future plan of each city on education improvement, because only the recent data was presented in the argument indicating that Blue City spent twice less than what Parson has spent. The term "recently" needs more concrete definition. Other scenarios are also likely that Blue spent much more than Parson 10 years ago and those money was spent on infrastructures like playground, computer labs, projection systems, desks or even buildings, which, after being built, would not required huge money investment in the future. However, things would be different in Parson City's case, as its public schools infrastrutures may be outdated recently which required Parson to invest much more money to rebuild. They may also possibilities that Blue city would spend much more in the near future in their city blueprint. Lacking systematically scrutinizing of the records and future plan would make the author's argument unconvincingly.

Thirdly, instead of focusing on the tax money spending public schools by the government, we should examine other ways residents of each city have done to improve the education level of their cities. There may be scenarios that Blue City's government launched more policy to improve the teaching abilities of their teachers of public schools, or to encourage more people to donate money to public schools for construction. Either way around would cast great doubt on what the author tries to argue.

To conclude, the argument that Parson City puts higher value than Blue city is lack of evidence as the information provided does not lend strong support to the argument the author wants to maintain. Before we could make a warrant evaluation of the argument, we need to gather more information about the average money spending on students and schools, the past investment records and future plans of money spending on education improvement and other methods residents have to improve the education level of public schools.



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发表于 2017-8-25 20:42:43 |显示全部楼层
The arguer in this argument displayed two different approaches that researched whether the children in Tertian culture were reared by their biological parents or entire village. The conclusions of these two researched conducted by these two approaches were also discussed in this argument. The argument indeed gave some necessary information to verify its views, however, several questions needed to be answered if the arguer wants to accurately gauge the correctness of the view of Dr. Field and Dr. Karp.
   Firstly, the detailed experimental designs of these two approaches should be provided. Without these details, it would be hard to judge the accuracy of approaches used by Dr. Field and Dr. Karp. For Dr. Field, the children might not be reared but taught by the other adults in this culture and this information may not be obtained by pure observation. While for Dr. Karp, although the talking time with their biological parents was more than that with other adults, it dose not represent the children were not reared by their biological parents. The other adults may charge the education or food for these children. In this case, the children were indeed reared by the entire village. All of these possibilities would exit unless the details of experiment designs were told. Therefore it is necessary for the arguer to display these details.
  Secondly, the culture should be introduced in this argument. All cultures have their own characteristics, which would influence the thoughts of their people. The people in this village may not think that they are rearing the children, they may just live together and share their food. Thus to comprehensively analyze whether the children were reared by entire village or their biological parents, it would be better to know their culture. The conditions of the people about their behave on rearing children in this culture could be inferred by the culture or traditions in this culture.
  Thirdly, although the arguer some anthropologists recommend the information would be more accurate if the research were conducted by interview-centered method. This could be correct only if the approach conducted by Dr. Field were more inaccurate than the approach used by Dr. Karp. The arguer only gave respective conclusion of these two researches, however, the comparison of these two researches was not enough. The author mentioned Dr. Karp's opposed views about observation-centered approach, but the reason why this approach is invalid was not given. Therefore more discussions and comparisons about these two approaches were expected to judge the correctness of these two approaches.
In conclusion, what the arguer asserts is not persuasive, and the logic in the argument is not complete either. To obtain a better conclusion, the argument should include enough details of experiment design and introduce Tertian culture. Enough comparisons between these two approaches were also needed to augment the validity of this argument.

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生农医药offer勋章 欧洲offer勋章 19周年勋章 寄托兑换店纪念章 寄托22周年

发表于 2017-8-25 21:34:35 |显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 bio-L 于 2017-8-25 21:54 编辑

10
Twenty years ago, Dr. Field, a noted anthropologist, visited the island of Tertia. Using an observation-centered approach to studying Tertian culture, he concluded from his observations that children in Tertia were reared by an entire village rather than by their own biological parents. Recently another anthropologist, Dr. Karp, visited the group of islands that includes Tertia and used the interview-centered method to study child-rearing practices. In the interviews that Dr. Karp conducted with children living in this group of islands, the children spent much more time talking about their biological parents than about other adults in the village. Dr. Karp decided that Dr. Field's conclusion about Tertian village culture must be invalid. Some anthropologists recommend that to obtain accurate information on Tertian child-rearing practices, future research on the subject should be conducted via the interview-centered method.

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.

TS
In the statement, the author argues that we should interview mainly to research if Tertia children reared by their biological parents due to his and Dr.Field’s conclusion. While his conclusion seems to make sense, before agree it, we need to ask a number of questions about the validity of the contrast between his and Dr. Field’s results and the representation of his results.
T1(full part)
Interviewed the children living in the groups of islands, the author found they prefer to talk about their biological parents and then, he conclude that these children are less likely to be reared by an entire village. For one thing, the author doesn’t assert directily that these children which were interviewed contain those live in Tertia. Indeed, the author visited Tertia and interviewed children in the group of islands. However, we don’t know if the author interviewed the Tertia children, as he could interview children only lived in other islands and make the same instruction. If the children lived in Tertia have the different expression? As the author also could say that children live in the islands speak more about their biological parents commonly if just little children talk about less. If these questions cannot be answered.it is hardly to agree the validity of the author’s study, and so the recommendation cannot be accepted.
T2
Besides,. the author also doesn’t suggest that this interview was not conducted by design.
T3
Granted that the author made a valid and representative research, to make the recommendation be impelling, we should know if we could contract Dr. Field’s conclusion with Dr. Karp simultaneously.
conclusion
In conclusion, to evaluate the recommendation, we should to know if there is no problem in Dr. Karp’s research and if we could ensure the research method is useful and valid and could be used in this subject by contract Dr. Karp’s study and Dr. Field’s study.

Issue 2
No. 61 People should undertake risky action only after they have carefully considered its consequences.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.

Intro paragraph:
Should we consider carefully about WC what consequences it will bring before we undertake risky action? The answer of this question depends on what kind of roles we play in our society.  It is true for the executors WC  in a company because the risky action they undertake is concern WF with the operation of the whole company. For leaders of a country, they have to make careful consideration before a risky action as it is concerned with country security. However, the statement may not be true for … such as  firemen because their hesitation will result in more casualties.

Point out the general class to which your examples belong
这里的问题是选择例子的时候有点散,没有给读者留下特别有代表性的感觉。
修改包括 去掉about,将executors in a company改成decision makers of a company,将concern with the operation改成determined to the normal operation (也不知道正不正确)。为了指明domain, 可以说 in commercial, … leaders of the government in a country… some other special domain

27 In any field of inquiry, the beginner is more likely than the expert to make important contributions.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

need more appropriate examples
开头段全文:
It is gradually accepted that, in any field of inquiry, the experts always have better chance to make important contributions than the beginners, it is because that the experts have developed better skills and techniques, have more thorough knowledge and have access to a variety of resources necessary for making a breakthrough.
并没有反驳哦
主题句1
The experts are well trained with skills and techniques of their field, which can make them easier RP  to make contribution.
        Example 1: For teachers, a well-trained teacher should not only have a deep understanding of their lessons but also should know how to convey the knowledge to their students and how to deal with the naughty students. These skills need time to practice, and without those skills, a teacher cannot to make more contribution in teaching
问题原因是作者太绝对地表示了contribution和教师的关系。作者用资历来表示能力,但是教师的贡献分为很多种,能影响教师做出贡献的能力也有很多种,比如学识,这些是资历之外的东西。
想要表明train -ability的关系,可以用技工 technician的例子。

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美国offer勋章

发表于 2017-8-25 21:47:55 |显示全部楼层
Arg 31 government spending and residents attitudes on public schools

The following appeared in a letter to the editor of Parson City's local newspaper.

"In our region of Trillura, the majority of money spent on the schools that most students attend—the city-run public schools—comes from taxes that each city government collects. The region's cities differ, however, in the budgetary priority they give to public education. For example, both as a proportion of its overall tax revenues and in absolute terms, Parson City has recently spent almost twice as much per year as Blue City has for its public schools—even though both cities have about the same number of residents. Clearly, Parson City residents place a higher value on providing a good education in public schools than Blue City residents do."

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.


直接根据老师写的提纲限时完成。只有260个单词,用软件检查出了好几个语法错误。
还有一周就要考试了,要加油啦!

The author of the letter concludes that the residents in Parson City consider providing a good education in public schools as a more important issue than Blue City residents do as the former has recently spent almost twice as much per year as the latter has for its public schools. We need more information about the spending records in the past decade, the total number of students and teachers and the attitudes that residents holds toward the local government.

To begin with, we need to know more about the spending records in the past ten years to see if the money spent on public schools recently can represent the tendency as a whole. For example, if the foundation of public education in Blue city is good enough due to long term efforts and contributions, then it is reasonable for the government to give more attention to other issues. In this case, a reduce in spent on public schools is acceptable. Given the long lasting contributions, people should not simply conclude that the residents in Blue City does not consider education in public schools as much important as those in Parson City.

In addition, the total number of students and teachers in both cities is also a vital information. It is likely that the demographic structures of both cities differs and if Parson city has more students and teachers than Blue, the money Parson spent per student or teacher may be less than Blue. Considering the money that is spent on every individual is also an important aspect of  evaluation.

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发表于 2017-8-25 21:48:20 |显示全部楼层
Argument 10/21/23
Arg 21 Dr. Field anthropologist

10) Twenty years ago, Dr. Field, a noted anthropologist, visited the island of Tertia. Using an observation-centered approach to studying Tertian culture, he concluded from his observations that children in Tertia were reared by an entire village rather than by their own biological parents. Recently another anthropologist, Dr. Karp, visited the group of islands that includes Tertia and used the interview-centered method to study child-rearing practices. In the interviews that Dr. Karp conducted with children living in this group of islands, the children spent much more time talking about their biological parents than about other adults in the village. Dr. Karp decided that Dr. Field's conclusion about Tertian village culture must be invalid. Some anthropologists recommend that to obtain accurate information on Tertian child-rearing practices, future research on the subject should be conducted via the interview-centered method.

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.

Claim: Children in Tertia were reared by an entire village rather than by their own biological parents
Data:Twenty years ago, Dr. Field used observation-centered way to test the children in Tertia and concluded that  children in Tertia were reared by an entire village .
Warrant: The experiment through the observation-centered way shows that children in Tertia were reared by an entire village .
Question: How did Dr.Field prove that children in Tertia were reared by an entire village through the observation-centered way .


Claim:Recently, Dr. Karp decided that Dr. Field's conclusion about Tertian village culture must be invalid.
Data:Recently another anthropologist, Dr. Karp, visited the group of islands that includes Tertia and used the interview-centered method to study child-rearing practices.
Warrant:In the interviews that Dr. Karp conducted with children living in this group of islands, the children spent much more time talking about their biological parents than about other adults in the village.
Question: Did the Tertia get any change during 20 years?
Was the sample of Dr.Karp's experiment the same as Dr.Field's?
What's the ratio of Tertia in the whole experiment islands?



Claim: To obtain accurate information on Tertian child-rearing practices, future research on the subject should be conducted via the interview-centered method.
Data: Recently, Dr. Karp decided that Dr. Field's conclusion about Tertian village culture must be invalid.
Warrant:Recently, Dr.Karp used the interview-centered method to study child-rearing of Tertia  practices and found that the children spent much more time talking about their biological parents than about other adults in the village.

开头段:According to the argument, after twenty year, Dr.Karp argued that Dr.Field's conclusion that was made by observation-centered way( that children in Tertia were reared by an entire village rather than by their own biological parents ) was invalid through the interview-centered  research way.Therefore, some anthropologists recommend that the interview-centered method is the first choice of Tertian child-rearing practices  to obtain accurate information on the subject. To evaluate this argument, we need to know more to analyse what we learned and decide whether the argument is reasonable or not.

中间段:
Inorder to evaluate Dr.Karp's conclusion ,the first question that I want to know is that Whether Tertia and  the surrounding island group have got great change or not in the past 20 years.As we know, Dr.Field made conclusion 20 years ago that children in Tertia were reared by an entire village rather than by their own biological parents .Nevertheless, It's of great possibility that Tertia and surrounding island group have change since then.For example, If 20 years ago, because the low standard of living in Tertia, the low birth rate made the whole village regard children as such a rare recourse that all people of the village cared and taught the children. However, with the development of economy and the improvement of the living standard, there are almost one or two children in each family. Then Every family would pay more attention to their own children that could cause the children to be  reared by their own biological parents rather than the whole village. In that case, Both the study could be correct , though the Dr.Karp's claim that Dr.Field's conclusion is invalid could be weakenes seriously.

修改问题:
According to the passage, the Palean baskets is a special type originally thought to be produced uniquely in the prehistoric village of Palea, were found in Lithos, so the purportedly '?alean' basket are not solely Palea. Because archaeologists discovered such a '?alean' basket in Lithos, a village across the Brim River from Palea. SF Since the Brim River is too deep and broad to be crossed and no Palean boats have been found, so-called Palean baskets were developed independently in both Palea and Lithos.< improve the summary of the argument> -   
~a bit too long~ There are some evidence SS should be used to scrutinize the argument critically, to assess the strength of the argument. ~
修改:
According to the Argument, the so-called Palean baskets maybe had been made by other people not only Palean people as the same baskets have been found in Lithos, where is an adjacent village of Palea ,which is separated from Lithos by deep and broad Brim River.Given that the ancient Paleans could have crossed it only by boat, and no Palean boats have been found,  It's believed that the baskets were not uniquely Palean.In order to evaluate this argument, we need more evidence to analyse what we learned.

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发表于 2017-8-25 22:02:04 |显示全部楼层
31) The following appeared in a letter to the editor of Parson City's local newspaper.

In our region of Trillura, the majority of money spent on the schools that most students attend the city-run public schools comes from taxes that each city government collects. The region's cities differ, however, in the budgetary priority they give to public education. For example, both as a proportion of its overall tax revenues and in absolute terms, Parson City has recently spent almost twice as much per year as Blue City has for its public schools even though both cities have about the same number of residents. Clearly, Parson City residents place a higher value on providing a good education in public schools than Blue City residents do.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

The author of the letter argues that Parson city residents value providing good education in public school more that Blue City residents since Parson City recently spent twice as much per year as Blue city on public schools even though both cities have the about the same number of residents. However, in order to evaluate the author’s argument, we need more evidence about the demographic information, the current condition of facilities in public schools, and the budget making process in two cities.

Firstly, we need more evidence about the demographic information in two cities. Although both cities have the same number of residents, this does not necessarily mean they have the same number of students in public schools. Maybe, Blue cities have fewer children hence has fewer students in public school, thus the amount of money spent on one child could have been higher in Blue cities. If this is the case, Blue cities residents actually care about education in public school more. Anyway, without further evidence about the demographic information in two cities, we can not decide whether the facts mentioned are enough to support the author’s argument.

In addition, we need more evidence about the current conditions of facilities in public schools in two cities. This is possibilities that public schools in Blue cities have perfect facilities due to investment in the past, thus there is just no need to invest in public school recently. While public schools in Parson City have suffered from poor facilities in recent years, and even there is twice as much invest, facilities here are still much poorer than those in Blue cities. Hence merely the fact that Parson cities invest more on public school is not enough to support the author’s claim, we need more evidence about the current conditions of facilities in public school in both cities.

Finally, we need more evidence about the budget making process in two cities. Perhaps in Blue cities, it is the government officials who make decisions about the budget while residents here do not have a word in the budget making process, and residents actually complain about the lack of investment in public schools. Hence the lack of investment in Blue cities reflects the opinions of officials instead of those of residents. Similarly, if budget decision were made by officials in Parson cities, the high invest in public schools here do not necessarily mean residents here value public schools high.

In sum, we need more evidence to decide whether the author ‘s argument is valid or not.

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寄托16周年纪念勋章 美国offer勋章 建筑offer勋章 在任资深版主

发表于 2017-8-25 22:07:24 |显示全部楼层
85) In a study of the reading habits of Waymarsh citizens conducted by the University of Waymarsh, most respondents said that they preferred literary classics as reading material. However, a second study conducted by the same researchers found that the type of book most frequently checked out of each of the public libraries in Waymarsh was the mystery novel. Therefore, it can be concluded that the respondents in the first study had misrepresented their reading habits.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

Claim:Waymarsh citizens preferred literary classics.
Data: A study of the reading habits of Waymarsh conducted by the University of Waymarsh.
Warrants: most respondents preferred literary classics.
Assumptions: These respondents are all waymarsh citizens .
Evidence needed:
a) More information about the respondent such as how many people took part in the study and their citizenship.

Claim: Waymarsh citizens preferred mystery novel.
Data: A second study conducted by the University of Waymarsh
Warrants: The most popular book in public library is mystery novel.
Assumptions:
a)Public library is the only place citizens get their books.
b)People who gets book in library could be the sample to study the whole citizens.
Evidence needed:
a) Library members’ information are they all waymarsh citizen?
b) Addition information is needed to draw a comprehensive conclusion, like other places for citizens to get books to read like collage library or bookstore or online shopping data.

Claim: respondents in the first study had misrepresented their reading habits.
Data: A second study conducted by the University of Waymarsh
Warrants: A second study conducted by the University of Waymarsh shows the most popular type of book in public library is mystery novel .
Assumption: the respondents in the first study all borrow mystery books most frequent than other books in the public library .
Evidence needed:
a)Are the respondents in two study the same?
b)The time range between the two studies. Because if the first one is taken 20years ago the respondents reading habits and their taste on books will change.


TS: In this article the author claim the respondents in the first study lie about their reading habits because the second study shows a different result. However we can’t give an effective evaluation on the conclusion for we are lack of information about the respondents in two studies and the data in the second study is lopsided. The most important thing is, the date of two studies is missing, so there is difficulties to draw evaluate the author’s claim.

Pt1: To start with we need to consider the fundamental question that whether the responds are qualified for this study, did their citizenships are valid.

Pt2: Furthermore, granted the respondents citizenship is valid, it remains a question that if those responds all borrow mystery novels the most in public library. … And moreover, they may have other access to books such as purchasing in bookstore , borrow in collage library or shopping online…..

PT3:Finally, even if we assume that they are the same respondents in two studies. It is still worthwhile to consider if the times of these two studies are close to each other.  For the reason that if the time range between these two studies are quite long, the credibility of using one test to defend another is questionable. For instance, if the second study is taken ten years after the first study, the respondents experience ten years in their lives . There is a possibility that their reading habits changed and the tastes mature with their age. In that situation, the reasoning of the author is weaken. Unless we are given the general date of the studies can we evaluate the authors reasoning lines.


我来点评其他网友

wanghaitao19939
字串:revise the topic sentence to better summarize the body paragraph
网友题目:
53)The following appeared in a health magazine.

The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. Furthermore, there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol. This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the most healthy citizens regularly eat.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.


开头段:
The author of the health magazine asserts that the citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. To support this argument, the writer presents a response of a recent survey show and two changes in certain substance selling. Although the assumptions WC- arguments seem plausible, the argument will be seriously challenged if these evidence proved to be unwarranted.
中间段:
To start with, the citizens’ responses to a recent survey show that they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. revise the topic sentence to better summarize the body paragraph  首先要指出我们需要哪方面的证据
Based on a unstated assumption that there has been such a government nutritional recommendations 10years ago, the writer endorse the citizens’ attitude toward nutrition has changed more healthful. However, the assumption is potentially problematic because there maybe no such a government nutritional recommendations 10years ago, even if we acknowledge this assumption, we need more evidence to compare the conformations to government nutritional recommendations 10years ago with now. If this is the case, the writer’s assumption will not hold and the conclusion will be clearly weakened.


修改习作:
To start with, the validation of the government nutritional recommendations should be checked and a comparison survey between the government nutritional recommendations today and the way it was 10 years ago is needed. Based on an unstated assumption that there has been such a government nutritional recommendations 10years ago , the writer endorsed the citizens ' attitude to nutrition has changed more healthful . However , the assumption is potentially problematic because there maybe no such a government nutritional recommendations 10years ago , even if we acknowledge this assumption , we need more evidence to compare the conformations to government nutritional recommendations 10years ago with now . If this is the case , the writer's assumption will not hold and the conclusion will be clearly weakened

另附上个人观点,不知道这样质疑题目中一些信息的真实性是不是可以的 因为老师有说do not assume that the argument is flawed 所以我觉得质疑题目信息的客观性是比较稳妥的 比如这里可以质疑:1十年前和现在的调查对象是不是一样的人?2十年前的政府建议营养标准和现在是不是一样(比如以前政府呼吁吃饱 现在呼吁均衡)3.他们对调查的回复属于主观回复还是客观事实 (比如血检肯定比问券调查更具有真实性)



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美国offer勋章

发表于 2017-8-25 22:19:34 |显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 freefm 于 2017-8-25 22:21 编辑

今天没时间,就写一下逻辑上所需要的evidence吧

31) The following appeared in a letter to the editor of Parson City's local newspaper.

In our region of Trillura, the majority of money spent on the schools that most students attend the city-run public schools comes from taxes that each city government collects. The region's cities differ, however, in the budgetary priority they give to public education. For example, both as a proportion of its overall tax revenues and in absolute terms, Parson City has recently spent almost twice as much per year as Blue City has for its public schools even though both cities have about the same number of residents. Clearly, Parson City residents place a higher value on providing a good education in public schools than Blue City residents do.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

Claim:Parson City has spent twice as much per year as Blue City has for its public schools.
Evidence 1: Two cities have similar tax revenues.
Evidence 2: Two cities have similar number of residents at the school age.
Evidence 3: The public schools are the only choice for the students in two cities.
Evidence 4: The schools in two cities have similar buildings, equipment, and faculty members.
Evidence 5: The difference of budgets in two cities remains the same in history.

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发表于 2017-8-25 23:04:34 |显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 Joker—XYZ 于 2017-8-25 23:18 编辑

Argument 10/21/23
Arg 21 Dr. Field anthropologist

10) Twenty years ago, Dr. Field, a noted anthropologist, visited the island of Tertia. Using an observation-centered approach to studying Tertian culture, he concluded from his observations that children in Tertia were reared by an entire village rather than by their own biological parents. Recently another anthropologist, Dr. Karp, visited the group of islands that includes Tertia and used the interview-centered method to study child-rearing practices. In the interviews that Dr. Karp conducted with children living in this group of islands, the children spent much more time talking about their biological parents than about other adults in the village. Dr. Karp decided that Dr. Field's conclusion about Tertian village culture must be invalid. Some anthropologists recommend that to obtain accurate information on Tertian child-rearing practices, future research on the subject should be conducted via the interview-centered method.

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.


Claim: Children in Tertia were reared by an entire village rather than by their own biological parents.
Data: Using an observation-centered approach.
Warrant: Dr. Field’s research and the way he did it.

Question: More details about the observation-centered approach.
                  How many children took part in the research?
Evidence: The data or research diary collected by Dr. Field.
Assumption: The conclusion holds true.


Claim: Dr. Field's conclusion about Tertian village culture must be invalid.
Data: Dr. Karp used the interview-centered method to study child-rearing practices.
Warrant: The children spent much more time talking about their biological parents than about other adults in the village.

Question: What is the difference between observation-centered approach and interview-centered approach?
                  Does the Tertian culture change a lot recently?
Evidence:The comparison of observation-centered approach and interview-centered approach.
                 The history of the Tertian culture.
Assumption: Interview-centered approach is a better choice of future research.

intro:

The author of the argument concludes that two anthropologists got contrast conclusions on the research of the Tertian culture by different approaches. In order to evaluate the soundness of the argument, We need more information about the researches, the difference between observation-centered approach and interview-centered approach, the changes of the Tertian culture.

1
To begin with, we need to know more about the observation-centered approach and details of Dr. Field’s research to see if the conclusion  is acceptable. For example, we want to know how many children took part in Dr. Field’s research. If a considerable number of children involved, the conclusion would be more dependable. Meanwhile, focusing on the observation-centered approach,  maybe the characters of it did not meet the requests of the research, thereby it may mislead Dr. Field to a false conclusion.

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发表于 2017-8-25 23:09:28 |显示全部楼层
21) The following appeared in an article written by Dr. Karp, an anthropologist.

Twenty years ago, Dr. Field, a noted anthropologist, visited the island of Tertia and concluded from his observations that children in Tertia were reared by an entire village rather than by their own biological parents. However, my recent interviews with children living in the group of islands that includes Tertia show that these children spend much more time talking about their biological parents than about other adults in the village. This research of mine proves that Dr. Field's conclusion about Tertian village culture is invalid and thus that the observation-centered approach to studying cultures is invalid as well. The interview-centered method that my team of graduate students is currently using in Tertia will establish a much more accurate understanding of child-rearing traditions there and in other island cultures.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.


开头段:
In this article, Dr. Karp concludes that children in Tertia were fostered by their own parents rather than the entire village, contradicting a research result twenty years ago by a prestigious anthropologist. Moreover, Dr. Karp insists that the interview-centered method is superior to the observation-centered approach about the validity. However, close scrutiny of this assumption reveals a great lack of critical evidence and therefore more information is needed to substantiate the author’s opinion.

中间段:
Even if in Dr. Karp’s group, interviewing children seems more effective than observations made by Dr. Field, it would be arbitrary to proclaim that interview-centered method could bring more reliable information. It would be of great help to know whether the children sincerely reveal the truth about their lives, because Karp’s group, to some extent, are strangers for them, and they may only talk about part of their lives rather than the whole reality. What is more, as a well-known research method in the field of Anthropology, participant-observation is accepted by anthropologist all around the world and be regarded as an objective method comparing the subjectivity in the interviews. If the author is not able to prove the objectivity in his interview data, his argument remains doubtful.

=====================================
因为自己的作业没被选进文档,所以挑了其他同学的文章作为例子

The increasingly rapid pace of life today causes more problems than it solves.

I agree that the life developing WC at an astonishing pace today has caused more problems than it solves

Ts1:with the advent of smart phone,a high-technology product which seemingly advances people’s lives,in effect,has exerted negative influence on their lifestyles while they have no sense of it.
-the reliance on social applications like Wechat,weibo lead people to   
-a mass of information delivered by applications can distract people’s attention and make them acquire information fragmentarily,rather than reading attentively.

need more appropriate examples
手机可以做的事情太多 所以要选一个更具体的例子 比如微博或者电邮
需要解释这个科技


修改后的例子
1) twitter (limited words, picture-oriented)
2) people quickly have an idea of others’ lives, personalities and hobbies, friends feel spirit-connected
3) some people may spend too much time on posting their lives and scanning others’ twitters on the net and somehow overlook their immitate family members

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发表于 2017-8-25 23:12:05 |显示全部楼层
Arg 21 Dr. Field anthropologist

10) Twenty years ago, Dr. Field, a noted anthropologist, visited the island of Tertia. Using an observation-centered approach to studying Tertian culture, he concluded from his observations that children in Tertia were reared by an entire village rather than by their own biological parents. Recently another anthropologist, Dr. Karp, visited the group of islands that includes Tertia and used the interview-centered method to study child-rearing practices. In the interviews that Dr. Karp conducted with children living in this group of islands, the children spent much more time talking about their biological parents than about other adults in the village. Dr. Karp decided that Dr. Field's conclusion about Tertian village culture must be invalid. Some anthropologists recommend that to obtain accurate information on Tertian child-rearing practices, future research on the subject should be conducted via the interview-centered method.

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.

The argument shows that two anthropologists studied on child-rearing practices on the island of Tertia but drew different conclusions on the question who reared the children. The recommendation from other anthropologists is that further research should be conducted via the interview-centered method. Who are the research subjects and who are interviewed for any purpose are crucially important to answer the question correctly and help with evaluation of the recommendation.

The first anthropologist Dr. Field studied Tertian culture by observation-centered approach which might look at the community as a whole but not the individual families with the children. If the subject of study includes both the community and individual families supported by both observations and interviews, the validity of conclusions could be strengthened. The observation helps to understand the behavior patterns of child-rearing practices while the interview facilitates to understanding why the children reared by entire village but not by their biological parents. If biological parents actually spent more time with the children at certain age which the observation couldn’t be covered, the conclusion by Dr. Field would be weakened and adjusted.

The second anthropologist Dr. Karp conducted interview-centered approach and perceived more information from children’s discussions on their biological parents, which shouldn’t be taken as a challenge to the validity of Dr. Field’s research. The subjects of interviews should not only include children but also adult parents because there are many interpretations on why children are talking their biological parents most of the time and it might be contradictory to the previous conclusion. For instance, the children were talking about parents because they don’t live with biological parents and miss them very much. In the meantime, if the interview-centered method is applied to study on parents, it might find out that parents never talk about their own kids for they are being reared by the holistic community rather than each family.
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发表于 2017-8-25 23:40:57 |显示全部楼层
Angelyyy 发表于 2017-8-24 16:37
今日修改材料是自己之前的第二类,有点不好意思
(RP – refer to the sources twice)
do not assume that ...

兩個Introductory paragraphs似乎是太冗長了。雖然老師有提到盡可能將分論點概括在首段,但是並不是把所有的問題都放出來,而是點與點之間的關係。試改如下:

今日修改材料是自己之前的第二类,有点不好意思
(RP – refer to the sources twice)
do not assume that the argument is flawed

1. Palean Basket unique

Woven baskets characterized by a particular distinctive pattern have previously been found only in the immediate vicinity of the prehistoric village of Palea and therefore were believed to have been made only by the Palean people. Recently, however, archaeologists discovered such a 'Palean' basket in Lithos, an ancient village across the Brim River from Palea. The Brim River is very deep and broad, and so the ancient Paleans could have crossed it only by boat, and no Palean boats have been found. Thus it follows that the so-called Palean baskets were not uniquely Palean.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

(RP – refer to the sources twice)
do not assume that the argument is flawed

According to the description of the research of the Palea basket, the author made the conclusion   that the basket is not unique in Palea.However, as far as I am concerned, it would be untenable to concede that. For the assumption made by the description, it would be presumptuous to say the river is so deep that people can’t cross without a boat. I doubt that if the river is as deep as the author depicted at that time.On the other hand,whether there are boats in Lithos?We should not to ignore the possibility that people in Lithos could cross the river to learn the skill from the Palea.And I would address the details of my arguments.

回想当时为何会写成这样,主要是因为重点关注在model上而忽略了基本写作要求,,自我拍砖,自我检讨
修改:
According to the description of the research, the author made the conclusion that the basket is not unique in Palea. The archaeologists once believed that the basket have been made only by the Palean people. However,Lithos found the basket.The fact is that Brim River is very deep and broad that people can’t cross it without boat.Meanwhile,no boats have been found in Palea. Based on these evidence,the author made the conclusion.For the assumption implied by the description, there are several parts needed consideration,for example,it would be presumptuous to say the river is so deep that people can’t cross without a boat. I doubt that if the river is as deep as the author depicted at that time.On the other hand,whether there are boats in Lithos?We should not to ignore the possibility that people in Lithos could cross the river to learn the skill from the Palea.And I would address the details of my arguments.

31.The following appeared in a letter to the editor of Parson City's local newspaper.

In our region of Trillura, the majority of money spent on the schools that most students attend the city-run public schools comes from taxes that each city government collects. The region's cities differ, however, in the budgetary priority they give to public education. For example, both as a proportion of its overall tax revenues and in absolute terms, Parson City has recently spent almost twice as much per year as Blue City has for its public schools even though both cities have about the same number of residents. Clearly, Parson City residents place a higher value on providing a good education in public schools than Blue City residents do.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

letter to the editor of Parson City's local newspaper.
Claim: Parson City presidents place a higher value on providing a good education in public schools than Blue City residents do.
In Trillura the majority of money spent on the schools that most students attend the city-run public schools comes from taxes that each city government collects.
The region's cities differ, in the budgetary priority they give to public education.
For example, both as a proportion of its overall tax revenues and in absolute terms, Parson City has recently spent almost twice as much per year as Blue City has for its public schools.
Both cities have about the same number of residents.

第一段
According to the letter to the editor of Parson City's local newspaper,the author made his conclusion that the Parson City presidents place a higher value on providing a good education in public schools than Blue City residents do. To support his claim,he described the facts that both as a proportion of its overall tax revenues and in absolute terms,Parson City has spent almost twice as much per year as blue City has for its public schools.Meanwhile,both cities have about the same number of residents,and have the same majority money supporting from government collects.However, the insufficient evidences such as how the money for promotion project was spent, the overall evaluation on education quality of Blue city, the current status of two city-run schools, the teaching evaluation of resources as well as the consumption lists of the schools should be covered in the consideration. I would clarify all the points at length as below.

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RE: argument第三类同主题写作 8月24-25日 [修改]
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