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[习作点评] ISSUE 18 求點評 [复制链接]

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美国18fall勋章

发表于 2018-6-18 22:03:22 |显示全部楼层
糾結了兩天還是覺得好像寫得不是很切貼。請各位大大幫忙看下!如果王老師能幫看就最好了!

The well-being of a society is enhanced when many of its people question authority.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

As the democracy increasingly gains its popularity and momentum, more and more people are aware of the importance of expressing their opinion towards all sorts of issues, especially questioning the authority. I believe it could advance the well-being of the society if people could question the authority in a proper manner. Yet, if many people question the authority for the sake of their own interests, it may hinder the development of the society instead.

To begin with, the right to question the government could enhance the transparency. If people could have a say in the course of government’s decision making, not only the government would benefit from the participation of its citizens, offering some constructive advice from a wider purview, the society could also make progress due to more feasible policies. As people get an increasing interest in government affairs, the government is under pressure and has to perform well. What’s more, with the development of the technology, citizens have an access to local government’s annual reports online and vote for certain policies that are closely related to their life. In this regards, government would act transparently so as to live up to the expectation. The progress of a society is made when its government would work hand in hand with its people.

In addition, dictatorship could be avoided. The reason why Hilter would turn into a dictator has something to do with lacking an effective accountability mechanism. If a leader has an absolute power without any restrictions, chances are he may end up being a dictator. To question a leader when he makes some vital decisions, like levying on imported goods from other countries, could force the leader to think twice before he would go for it. Also, such move would remind the leader that the country is not merely in his hand, but in the public’s. There is no doubt that the society would benefit from a open-minded leader.

However, it is not always a rosy picture when many people question the authority for their own sake. The former American president Obama set up a webpage, We the People, where people could make a petition letting the White House to get involved in certain issues. Some would make ridiculous petitions like “help us get rid of CET 4/6 (a Chinese English test)” or “help save my little kitten” and the like. Undoubtedly, such petitions would take up the coverage while the exigent and important ones may be left out. It’s not only a waste of government resources, but also the faith people have in it. Accordingly, people may lose faith in the government, and the society may suffer from its negative residents, who may resort to violence.

In conclusion, the society would benefit from the query of the people towards the authority, enhancing the transparency and avoiding the dictatorship. Nevertheless, if people only question the authority for their own benefits, the society may suffer.  

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寄托兑换店纪念章 US-applicant

发表于 2018-6-23 07:45:58 |显示全部楼层
我们7月2日会开始GRE作文训练营。你的这篇文章主要问题是开头段的主旨句对观点的概括不够准确,和中间段的内容也没有很好的呼应。建议你先练习写提纲,等思路的问题解决了再写全文。

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