Issue41 [Victors小组]第八次作业 by H-Kevin (版主推荐参考习作)

H-KevinUID：2182070

Issue41

Such nonmainstream areas of inquiry as astrology, fortune-telling, and psychic and paranormal pursuits play a vital role in society by satisfying human needs that are not addressed by mainstream science.

不限时  600字

As for the claim that these non-stream areas of inquiry will satisfy the human needs, we already have sufficient empirical evidence that this will simply not be correct. For nearly fifty centuries we have been pursuit the various human needs and requirement through research in both non-stream areas and traditional sciences. Yet the majority apparent and equipment, even the way of thinking are the benefits from orthodox science. In fact, as non-stream areas of inquiry, astrology, fortune and psychics and paranormal pursuits are lasting in thousands years, which has been the advent of methods catering exclusively to human inborn curiosities in various aspects. The more reasonable conclusions that compare with mainstream science; non-stream area of inquiry has actually served to satisfy more human inborn curiosities than the human needs.

More over, in my view non-stream area of inquiry will continue to thrive for same reason that people still go out for the expedition of unknown fields: we all need to "get away" from our familiar routine and surroundings from time to time. Will mainstream alter this inborn desire? Certainly not. In short, non-stream area of inquiry is a manifestation of edge-side approach for variety and for exploration. This edge-side approach is why humans have come to use constellation for defining their characteristics, and will just surely make a decision on whether these couples are suitable and whether they have a fate that they will have a boy in the certain year.

However, the speaker unfairly assumes that these areas are therefore vital to society. Were these the case, I would entirely agree that people should treat this kind of inquiry as one of important fields like mainstream science. But, non-stream areas of inquiry are not primarily about reasoning and logical approach. Instead, It is about self-deception and false hope, even fantastic ideas and delusion. Could anyone honestly claim that these fantastic ideas and delusion serves as a suitable substitute for reasonable planning and imaging on their work and life? Surely not.  The physical world is laden with a host of such delight that we humans are compelling to experience down-to-earth.

In fact, non-stream areas of inquiry might actually harm society due to its irrational and unreasonable actions. Even more significantly, to the extant on a personal level, stubborn adherence to irrational belief in the face of reason and empirical evidence can lead to self -righteous arrogance, intolerance, anti-society behavior, and even hatred. As a result, many people who previously would not have the courage to present the abnormal behavior will soon conduct the strange action under the Instigation from these areas.


Admittedly, not mainstream science but astrology, fortune and psychics and paranormal pursuits might eventually satisfy human inborn curiosities other than basic needs, as the wanted information could be collected without any science process. The happiness oriented from lucky fate and fortune that can be decided by one's strive of whole life can now be hypothesized without any efforts. And the despaired people will insight his new life through a good word from man-made forecast system based on astrology. To the extent that the pressure keep rise accompany with increased development of industrializing in the modern society, more and more people will seek console from non-stream areas of inquiry as a result. Yet it would be absurd to claim that only satisfying the curiosities alone will be the reason why this kind of inquiry could be vital for society.

In sum, non-stream areas of inquiry might be legitimate insofar as they afford many people psychological solace in life.  However, due to the feature of irrational and unreasoning, it would not be a vital role in our society.


[ 本帖最后由 expire7 于 2007-6-13 00:36 编辑 ]

expire7UID：2160574

seat taken

expire7UID：2160574

Issue41

Such nonmainstream areas of inquiry as astrology, fortune-telling, and psychic and paranormal pursuits play a vital role in society by satisfying human needs that are not addressed by mainstream science.

不限时  600字（以后先给出你的中文提纲，比较方便大家修改）
As for the claim that these non-stream areas of inquiry will satisfy the human needs, we already have sufficient empirical evidence that this will simply not be correct.（意思语法没问题就是读起别扭。尤其最后一个同位语从句） For nearly fifty centuries we have been pursuit（单词错误吧？） the various human needs and requirement through research in both non-stream areas and traditional sciences. Yet the majority apparent（理解不了，名词和形容词并列了。笔误吧。发上来时候检查一下。） and equipment, even the way of thinking are（is） the benefits from orthodox science.（这句话很难理解，因此前后文断裂开了。） In fact, as non-stream areas of inquiry, astrology, fortune and psychics and paranormal pursuits are lasting in thousands（of） years, which has been the advent of methods catering exclusively to human inborn curiosities in various aspects. The more reasonable conclusions that compare(comparing) with mainstream science; non-stream area of inquiry has actually served to satisfy more human inborn curiosities than the human needs.（有点绕的开头。表现出不错的语言功底，遗憾的是句子之间的转陈连接不够。跳跃感太强了。）


More over(moreover) , in my view non-stream area of inquiry will continue to thrive for （需要冠词？）same reason that people still go out for the expedition of unknown fields: we all need to "get away" from our familiar routine and surroundings from time to time. Will mainstream alter this inborn desire? Certainly not. In short, non-stream area of inquiry is a manifestation of edge-side approach for variety and for exploration. This edge-side approach is why humans have come to use constellation for defining their characteristics, and will just surely make a decision on whether these couples are suitable and whether they have a fate that they will have a boy in the certain year.（好像这里才开头完一样，有趣。）


However, the speaker unfairly assumes that these areas are therefore vital to society. Were these the case, I would entirely agree that people should treat this kind of inquiry as one of important fields like mainstream science. But, non-stream areas of inquiry are not primarily about reasoning and logical approach. Instead, It（it） is about self-deception and false hope, even fantastic ideas and delusion. Could anyone honestly claim that these fantastic ideas and delusion serves as a suitable substitute for reasonable planning and imaging on their work and life? Surely not.  The physical world is laden with a host of such delight that we humans are compelling to experience down-to-earth.


In fact, non-stream areas of inquiry might actually harm society due to its irrational and unreasonable actions. Even more significantly, to the extant on a personal level, stubborn adherence to irrational belief in the face of reason and empirical evidence can lead to self -righteous arrogance, intolerance, anti-society behavior, and even hatred. As a result, many people who previously would not have the courage to present the abnormal behavior will soon conduct the strange action under the Instigation from these areas.


Admittedly, not mainstream science but astrology, fortune and psychics and paranormal pursuits might eventually satisfy human inborn curiosities other than basic needs, as the wanted information could be collected without any science process. The happiness oriented from lucky fate and fortune that can be decided by one's strive of whole life can now be hypothesized without any efforts. And the despaired people will insight his new life through a good word from man-made forecast system based on astrology. To the extent that the pressure keep rise accompany with increased development of industrializing in the modern society, more and more people will seek console from non-stream areas of inquiry as a result. Yet it would be absurd to claim that only satisfying the curiosities alone will be the reason why this kind of inquiry could be vital for society.


In sum, non-stream areas of inquiry might be legitimate insofar as they afford many people psychological solace in life.  However, due to the feature of irrational and unreasoning, it would not be a vital role in our society.
写的不错的习作。感觉如果稍微注意和调整一些地方，5分以上的文章。很久没看到这种习作了，加油。
P．s:早知道抢到作文版来了。

[ 本帖最后由 expire7 于 2007-6-13 00:34 编辑 ]

mirror_WangUID：2346649

留名学习
两位版主字体都很小

lucialuckyUID：2347401

GOOD ORGANIZED

mirror_WangUID：2346649

提纲：
1、提出观点：经验告诉我们，非主流满足人类需求不正确。其实际作用在于满足人类好奇心。（疑问：这样的分类正确吗？好奇心不是一种需求吗？）
2、递进：因为非主流是边际手段（edge-side approach），所以它会继续流行。举例：星座预测情人。（疑问：与上一段构成递进关系吗？）
3、转折：非主流不vital，否则就成为了主流。它无关逻辑推理，而全部是自欺欺人。（疑问：是否vital和是否主流有关吗？作者在这一段默认了正确的必须是逻辑推理亦即主流的，这算不算是begging the question？）
4、递进：非主流可能带来社会层面和个人层面的混乱。
5、让步：非主流有一定优点，可以安慰大众。

H-KevinUID：2182070

惭愧惭愧，看了版内大量优秀版友习作才磨矶出来一篇:loveliness:

谢谢expire7斑主的修改:)

jennetrjUID：2275453

Issue41

Such nonmainstream areas of inquiry as astrology, fortune-telling, and psychic and paranormal pursuits play a vital role in society by satisfying human needs that are not addressed by mainstream science.

不限时  600字

As for the claim that these non-stream areas of inquiry will satisfy the human needs, we already have sufficient empirical evidence that this will simply not be correct. For nearly fifty centuries we have been pursuit the various human needs and requirement through research in both non-stream areas and traditional sciences. Yet the majority apparent [查了韦氏词典，理解力有限不知是哪个解释；还是应该写做apparatus?]and equipment, even the way of thinking are the benefits from orthodox science. In fact, as non-stream areas of inquiry, astrology, fortune and psychics and paranormal pursuits are lasting in thousands years, which has been the advent of methods catering exclusively to human inborn curiosities in various aspects. The more reasonable conclusions that compare with mainstream science[很好的句式，可是下半句呢？]; non-stream area of inquiry has actually served to satisfy more human inborn curiosities than the human needs[加the 与不加，needs的用法不同，貌似needs作为动词，解释为非主流更多满足了人类与生俱来的好奇心多于人们所需要的]. [首段的观点是何？没找到]

More over, in my view non-stream area of inquiry will continue to thrive for same reason that people still go out for the expedition of unknown fields: we all need to "get away" from our familiar routine and surroundings from time to time. Will mainstream alter this inborn desire? Certainly not. In short, non-stream area of inquiry is a manifestation of edge-side approach for variety and for exploration. This edge-side approach is why humans have come to use constellation for defining their characteristics, and will just surely make a decision on whether these couples are suitable and whether they have a fate that they will have a boy in the certain year.

However, the speaker unfairly assumes that these areas are therefore vital to society. Were these the case, I would entirely agree that people should treat this kind of inquiry as one of important fields like mainstream science. But, non-stream areas of inquiry are not primarily about reasoning and logical approach. Instead, It is about self-deception and false hope, even fantastic ideas and delusion. Could anyone honestly claim that these fantastic ideas and delusion serves as a suitable substitute for reasonable planning and imaging on their work and life? Surely not.  The physical world is laden with a host of such delight that we humans are compelling to experience down-to-earth.[ 建议LZ不要用ARGUMENT的写法展开ISSUE，容易被判题材问题]

In fact, non-stream areas of inquiry might actually harm society due to its irrational and unreasonable actions. Even more significantly, to the extant on a personal level, stubborn adherence to irrational belief in the face of reason and empirical evidence can lead to self -righteous arrogance, intolerance, anti-society behavior, and even hatred. As a result, many people who previously would not have the courage to present the abnormal behavior will soon conduct the strange action under the Instigation from these areas. [多举几个例子，文章更有血肉！]


Admittedly, not mainstream science but astrology, fortune and psychics and paranormal pursuits might eventually satisfy human inborn curiosities other than basic needs, as the wanted information could be collected without any science process. The happiness oriented from lucky fate and fortune that can be decided by one's strive of whole life can now be hypothesized without any efforts. And the despaired people will insight his new life through a good word from man-made forecast system based on astrology. To the extent that the pressure keep rise accompany with increased development of industrializing in the modern society, more and more people will seek console from non-stream areas of inquiry as a result. Yet it would be absurd to claim that only satisfying the curiosities alone will be the reason why this kind of inquiry could be vital for society.

In sum, non-stream areas of inquiry might be legitimate insofar as they afford many people psychological solace in life.  However, due to the feature of irrational and unreasoning, it would not be a vital role in our society.

个人观点，读了LZ的ISSUE，好像是看完GRE阅读，可能我的理解力有限。