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发表于 2009-3-10 03:16:42 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
本帖最后由 irvine666 于 2009-3-10 03:26 编辑

本来还想写一段扩展型的讨论,就是那种:xxx不是唯一的解决方案,方案可能还有哪几种。 不过算了下字数已经实在太恐怖,所以略过。

TOPIC: ARGUMENT242 - The following appeared as an editorial in the student newspaper of Groveton College.
"To combat the recently reported dramatic rise in cheating among college and university students, these institutions should adopt honor codes similar to Groveton's, which calls for students to agree not to cheat in their academic endeavors and to notify a faculty member if they suspect that others have cheated. Groveton's honor code replaced an old-fashioned system in which students were closely monitored by teachers and an average of thirty cases of cheating per year were reported. The honor code has proven far more successful: in the first year it was in place, students reported twenty-one cases of cheating; five years later, this figure had dropped to fourteen. Moreover, in a recent survey conducted by the Groveton honor council, a majority of students said that they would be less likely to cheat with an honor code in place than without."
WORDS: 568 + 100(修改的时候添加)TIME: 00:30:00        DATE: 2009-3-9 下午 07:09:31

The suggestion of adopting honor codes similar to Groveton College(GC)'s at first glance soundly bases upon the evidence of declining number of cases of cheating, the survey of Groveton honor council, and the assumption that the great success of GC could be wide spread by the same regulation, still, to prove these hypothesises needs more work of reasoning.

The major suspicion stems from the doubt whether the number of cheating cases indeed declined. To be realistic, the statistics of the study, reliable and objective as it might be, is not sufficient to buttress the deduction of the author. Could the report coming from students reflect the real phenomenon of cheating? Advanced tricks might play an important role in the declining number of students who cheated in examination. In other words, the decreasing number of cheaters reported might only illustrate that fewer students who did not utilizing high-tech cheating measures had been "caught" in examination, rather than that they had complied with the restriction of GC more than ever before. There might exist a myriad of students cheated but did not be reported in test. Besides, students might not be willing to report others who were cheating. If, for example, certain compromise -- such as cheating together or keeping silent about others' cheating action -- has been established among the students during the past five years, the honor code would be finally proven to work little, if any, in preventing cheating.  

In addition, another survey of the less-cheating will of students faces the similar challenge too. Its generality is first questioned. How many students were included in the survey? Without a significantly large sample pool, one would require great act of will to trust a survey. Generally speaking, as is self-evident, a survey related to education is useful only when it manages to deputize general will of all students. Unfortunately, for the author might intentionally conceal the number of the respondents, it is reasonable for readers to suspect the representativeness of the survey. Moreover, the grade and gender of the students have been undeserved overlooked. Were the interviewees limited in one or several groups sharing similar study customs? If those who preferred not to cheat are mainly students in grade one, or if majority of the example were girls who enjoyed attending class and doing homework, the will of respondents could hardly represented that most students would not take part in speculation any more. Since the author simply slipped these issues, the survey he cited appears to be insufficient to bolster his judgment of students' attitude toward the honor code.

What is more, even if the honor code of GC verified to be an effective approach to inhibit and eliminate cases of cheating, to generalize its experience to every college, being blind to the differences in educational level, is skeptical. The average degree of difficulty of tests, as is apparent, should be taken into account. If, for instance, the examinations of other universities are much harder than the one of GC, students of those colleges would be overwhelmingly likely to cheat. Actually, when the supervisors simultaneously turn out to be the cheaters, they would certainly lose their function of supervising. Such phenomenon should be to serve as essential negative impact to the effectiveness of the regulation. Therefore, the suggestion of wide spread of the honor code might be an action with little effect. Though the author might confidently believe that the same honor code measure would be actualized everywhere, his failure to scrutinize the education and examination condition of each college does weaken his position.

In sum, the author supplied a seemingly beneficent suggestion to prohibit students from cheating, whereas his deduction is not rational. Were there more background of the investigation demonstrating that the number of cases of cheating was really decreased by the honor code policy, detailed information about the participators of the survey, and comprehensive conditions of those colleges and universities suffering dramatic rise in cheating, the advice of him would be relatively strengthened.
平生太湖上,短棹几经过,于今重到何事? 愁比水云多。拟把匣中长剑,换取扁舟一叶,归去老渔蓑。银艾非吾事,丘壑已蹉跎。
脍新鲈,斟美酒,起悲歌:太平生长,岂谓今日识干戈!欲泻三江雪浪,净洗胡尘千里,无为挽天河。回首望霄汉,双泪坠清波。
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发表于 2009-3-13 14:06:06 |只看该作者
1# irvine666

第一段有问题,起码标点符号要改。still前可以加句号。

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板凳
发表于 2009-3-13 14:25:17 |只看该作者
句号?still是插入结构啊

呵呵 请ls详解一下啦

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地板
发表于 2009-3-13 14:47:04 |只看该作者
still(尽管如此) 属于一个语气很轻的转折副词,用法没有however那么严格,甚至可以当连词用,类似于whereas,给个例子好了:she felt ill, still she went to work.
所以前面不要句号也没有问题。
平生太湖上,短棹几经过,于今重到何事? 愁比水云多。拟把匣中长剑,换取扁舟一叶,归去老渔蓑。银艾非吾事,丘壑已蹉跎。
脍新鲈,斟美酒,起悲歌:太平生长,岂谓今日识干戈!欲泻三江雪浪,净洗胡尘千里,无为挽天河。回首望霄汉,双泪坠清波。

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发表于 2009-3-13 17:10:11 |只看该作者
句子太长,我们只看主干:

The suggestion……bases upon the evidence ……, the survey ……, and the assumption……, still, to prove these hypothesises needs more work of reasoning.

still前后都是完整的句子,根本没必要强扭在一起。still表转折时,一般前面有although。例子:Although she felt ill, she still went to work. 她虽然觉得身体不舒服, 但仍然去上班了. (来源:牛津高阶英汉双解词典)

连在一起的缺点有三个:1、句子太长,视觉疲劳;2、分开来,更容易看出来,重要内容是后一句;3、argument需要用足火力攻击,用still这种转折词太轻了。

依我看,你把still改成however,分成两句,效果会更好。

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发表于 2009-3-13 17:17:28 |只看该作者
这个要注意:带although的句子,still的意思是“仍然”,不是“尽管如此”,这个小词用法很灵活,辞典只给了一个例子而已。
而且我觉得奇怪的是,用still和however有什么区别么,语气轻一点也没错,毕竟argument的出发点是好的,只不过逻辑存在问题而已。
很多人动不动就扔上强烈否定的arbitrarily,impatiently之类涉嫌人身攻击的词才是真的有问题吧
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平生太湖上,短棹几经过,于今重到何事? 愁比水云多。拟把匣中长剑,换取扁舟一叶,归去老渔蓑。银艾非吾事,丘壑已蹉跎。
脍新鲈,斟美酒,起悲歌:太平生长,岂谓今日识干戈!欲泻三江雪浪,净洗胡尘千里,无为挽天河。回首望霄汉,双泪坠清波。

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发表于 2009-3-13 17:47:11 |只看该作者
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发表于 2009-3-13 17:51:11 |只看该作者
本帖最后由 comorain 于 2009-3-14 09:35 编辑
这个要注意:带although的句子,still的意思是“仍然”,不是“尽管如此”,这个小词用法很灵活,辞典只给了一个例子而已。
而且我觉得奇怪的是,用still和however有什么区别么,语气轻一点也没错,毕竟argument的出 ...
irvine666 发表于 2009-3-13 17:17


still当然不是“尽管如此”的意思,它不可能放在转折复合句的上半部分。

我翻了几部词典,你说的用法我还是没找到。下面是词典的例子:

1、still:in spite of that; nevertheless; even so 尽管那样; 然而; 不过; 虽然如此: He's treated you badly: still, he's your brother and you should help him. 他待你很不好; 但他终归是你的兄弟, 你应该帮助他. * Although she felt ill, she still went to work. 她虽然觉得身体不舒服, 但仍然去上班了. (牛津高阶英汉双解词典)

2、still:in spite of what has just been said or done

 The hotel was terrible. Still, we were lucky with the weather. (朗文当代英语词典)

3、You use still to emphasize that something remains the case or is true in spite of what you have just said.

I'm average for my height. But I still feel I'm fatter than I should be.
Despite the ruling, Boreham was still found guilty.

ADV: ADV before v
= nonetheless  
(柯林斯高阶英语词典)

至于各种转折词程度的微妙差异,我的体会是:

but最强,其次nevertheless,however再次之,然后是yet,最后是still。

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发表于 2009-3-13 18:10:46 |只看该作者
本帖最后由 comorain 于 2009-3-13 18:47 编辑

7楼说得很对,however前面要用分号,实际上还是一个句子。但看起来关系会明朗一些,still是个很模糊的词。

改法一:The suggestion of adopting honor codes similar to GrovetonCollege(GC)'s at first glance soundly bases upon the evidence ofdeclining number of cases of cheating, the survey of Groveton honorcouncil, and the assumption that the great success of GC could be widespread by the same regulation; however, to prove these hypothesises needsmore work of reasoning.
(我很怀疑,即使用still,恐怕前面也是分号而不是逗号)

改法二:The suggestion of adopting honor codes similar to GrovetonCollege(GC)'s bases upon the evidence ofdeclining number of cases of cheating, the survey of Groveton honorcouncil, and the assumption that the great success of GC could be widespread by the same regulation. On its surface, that argument sounds reasonable; neverthless, to prove these hypothesises needsmore work of reasoning. (哈佛大学教授曼昆曾在他的博客上用过前半部分,只不过后半部分他用的是but。)

但这样一来,你前面那一句就显得很平淡,可以进一步改为:

Basing on the evidence ofdeclining number of cases of cheating, the survey of Groveton honorcouncil, and the assumption that the great success of GC could be widespread by the same regulation, the newspaper editorial suggests that other colleges or universities should adopt honor codes similar to Groveton college's.
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发表于 2009-3-13 18:21:46 |只看该作者
恩,的确是用分号更好...我更倾向于把逗号改成分号
平生太湖上,短棹几经过,于今重到何事? 愁比水云多。拟把匣中长剑,换取扁舟一叶,归去老渔蓑。银艾非吾事,丘壑已蹉跎。
脍新鲈,斟美酒,起悲歌:太平生长,岂谓今日识干戈!欲泻三江雪浪,净洗胡尘千里,无为挽天河。回首望霄汉,双泪坠清波。

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发表于 2009-3-14 23:34:05 |只看该作者
Sill 的用法和Also 做连词使用时相似, 通常单独放到句首,后跟逗号, 引出要说的话。

另外, she felt ill, still she went to work. 这个句子是错误的, 这是run-on。

正确的使用应当为:
1。 she felt ill. Still, she went to work.
2.   she felt ill; still, she went to work.
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发表于 2009-3-17 20:07:25 |只看该作者
哇,大家讨论的好高深

我还是迷茫啊,就是攻击的第二点,一直在纠结中,这算不算攻击survey本身??特别是那个intentionally conceal,是不是质疑了人家的诚信问题??我也很想攻击这些,并且怀疑调查者诱导被调查者以得出他们的结论等等。但是草木斑斑说不要攻击这些,呃,也可能是我还是没理解好他的意思。看了我提纲的人也说不要攻击survey本身,不要怀疑人家诚信。我越来越糊涂了啊···

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发表于 2009-3-17 20:14:03 |只看该作者
本帖最后由 irvine666 于 2009-3-17 21:15 编辑

我这个文章里面提到 intentionally conceal的是 causality relationship,就是典型的因推不出果,因为这个因果错误很明显,然而作者确忽略掉了,因此用了intentionally这个词。
平生太湖上,短棹几经过,于今重到何事? 愁比水云多。拟把匣中长剑,换取扁舟一叶,归去老渔蓑。银艾非吾事,丘壑已蹉跎。
脍新鲈,斟美酒,起悲歌:太平生长,岂谓今日识干戈!欲泻三江雪浪,净洗胡尘千里,无为挽天河。回首望霄汉,双泪坠清波。

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发表于 2009-3-17 20:41:21 |只看该作者
哦,有点似懂非懂哎,我也只写了一篇,所以很多都搞不清,不好意思呵呵
那不是质疑调查者故意作假或诱导,而是怀疑他使用的方法问题比如抽样不合理什么的以至于影响对于结论的推理还是可以的是吧?
发现自己在这个问题上有点开始钻牛角尖了···

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发表于 2009-3-17 23:25:57 |只看该作者
文我没看,就光对开头和still给自己看法:

1)开头实在太难读……读完了甚至都不知道观点是啥……与其写这么一个长句我觉得其实还不如没开头算了…… :L

2)关于still到底是啥意思,我不好说。我只是理解,这个词在句子里会表达一种“一如既往”或是“没有改变”的意思。是不是由它来表达转折了,这个我觉得不尽然。如果前面或是后面有说,有改变了,那就是有转折,如果没有改变,那就是没转折~

个人窃以为,精确用词是值得鼓励,不过,太过纠结一个词两个词,呵呵,是不是舍了西瓜顾着芝麻?^^


我不是来仲裁的哈,我只是说我看法~~  :P
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