求拍砖~新G Argument 14
本帖最后由 Pacid 于 2011-12-10 20:37 编辑大家好！第一次写Argument，虽然这次要去打酱油了，还是想好好利用一下……请猛拍，谢谢了！！！！
很想知道这样有没有写到关键点上……另外还想写一个现在的繁荣不意味着以后也能，但是写不下去了，这条有用吗？
437个字，是不是在太少了……
题目： ”A recentstudy rating 300 male and female Mentian advertising executives according tothe average number of hours they sleep per night showed an association betweenthe amount of sleep the executives need and the success of their firms. Of theadvertising firms studied, those whose executives reported needing no more than6 hours of sleep per night had higher profit margins and faster growth. Theseresults suggest that if a business wants to prosper, it should hire only peoplewho need less than 6 hours of sleep per night."
提纲：
1他们如实回答
2只用少睡这一种因素
3M的广告公司的高管能代表所有的公司的所有职位
4现在繁荣意味处以后也能
习作：
The writer reachesa conclusion of only those who need less than 6 hours of sleep per night are tobe hired by a company seeking for prosperity by a study concerning 300 Mentianadvertising executives. While it may see at first glance plausible that lesssleep means longer working hour and thus leads to the success of a company,there are quite some assumptions upon which the writer base his conclusion thatare untenable.
First of all, the authorassumes that all the respondents are reporting the truth, which provides themost fundamental basis for the argument. It is easy to understand as only theassumption being true can the study be taken as a support for the argument. Nevertheless,some of the executives may be hiding the truth owing to some reasons such asthey want to be regarded as more diligent than others or they want to show theyare more energetic, etc. the circumstances stated above will definitely reversethe result of the study and thus undermining the whole argument.
Based on theassumption above, the author then assumes that the executives of companies withhigher profit and faster growth are only those who reported to sleep less inthe study. However, other aspects such as working efficiency and graduationdegree, if inquired and showing a relevance to the prosperity of the companiesas well, may be overlooked deliberately by the author, thus undermining thesoundness of the argument as the author emphasized that only those who sleepless are to be hired.
With these twoassumptions, the author also assumes that what is concluded from the executivesof Mertian advertising companies can be applied to all companies and all theworker of a company. This assumption is necessary for the arguments as itserves as the bridge between the study and the conclusion which started with “ifa business wants to prosper”, meaning it is applicable to all business. Thisassumption, however, is flawed as the author failed to provide evidence strongenough to support it. For example, we are well informed that the requirementsof different kinds of jobs varies, a worker may need well as much as eighthours, for instance, to recover strength to work efficiently.
To conclude, theredoes seem to be a relevance between less sleep of employers and higher profitmargins and faster growth of a company, but the author fails to provide solidproof for the assumption shown above which are necessary for the conclusion tobe reached. The author may well need to do more work to make his argument moresounding and compelling.
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