Issue 91- primary goal of tech advancement- increase efficency and leisure time
本帖最后由 tesolchina 于 2014-12-15 12:58 编辑本帖来自"14年秋季GRE提纲+全文互改小组"，欢迎关注！你还可以查看更多小组、创建小组91) The primary goal of technological advancement should be to increase people's efficiency so that they have more leisure time.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
没有相关Issue题目。
请回帖时按照指引链接列出英语提纲并用汉语解释并根据指引点评楼上的提纲。 第一个回帖的同学不必点评。
指引链接：https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1777364-1-1.html
重要提示：
注意题目的关键词是should 也就是要我们讨论科技发展的基本目标应该是什么 如果仅仅讨论目前的情况是不符合题目要求的-tesolchina TS
The technological development continues to increase the human's productivity all the time, which benefit the mankind. However, its primary goal may not necessarily be the more leisure time pf people. Admittedly, this statement could hold true for the techniques for normal people. On the contrary, specific technology designed for industry may not tend to increase the labor’s spare time, but achieve greater profit. In addition, current technological development could encourage the healthy competition among scientists as well as following advancement.
Ts1
The technologies, especially the ones invented for daily use, is primarily intended to improve people's efficiency and therefore save their time. 面向对普通人的技术都迎合了人性的懒惰，所以目的就是提高效率省时间。举例洗碗机洗衣机
Ts2
However, the primary intention of technological improvement for the industry could be another story. 工业技术能被应用的前提是盈利，导致其首要目的是利益最大化。老板引入新技术，使用者员工生产率提高了但可能不能获得任何更多的空闲时间。
Ts3
Furthermore, in science area, these new technology could serve as the stimulation for the peers. 科技进步对科学界主要是激励的作用，可以促进良性竞争和对现有技术的完善。举例，贝尔并非第一个发明电话的人，而是一位德国科学家生产的不能工作的电话启发了他，最后终于使这个跨时代技术可用了。
本帖最后由 max940623 于 2014-11-12 22:10 编辑
po全文，辛苦老师帮我看看表达和论证方面的问题
现在我定时写30分钟只能写到约320字，因为经常写到后面要回去改主旨句而且文思也枯竭，不知道有什么办法能加速:dizzy:
The technological development continues to increase the human's productivity all the time, which benefit the mankind. However, its primary goal may not necessarily be the more leisure time pf people. Admittedly, this statement could hold true for the techniques for normal people. On the contrary, specific technology designed for industry may not tend to increase the labor’s spare time, but achieve greater profit. In addition, current technological development could encourage the healthy competition among scientists as well as following advancement.
The technologies, especially the ones invented for daily use, is primarily intended to improve people's efficiency and therefore save their time. Since one of the human essence, laziness, will call on the convenience continuously, there will always be inventors catering to this mind and promote the technological progress in every use. For example, the technology of laundry machine and dishes washer only require several pressing on the buttons, therefore release the housewives from the traditional heavy housework and bring them more spare time.
However, the primary intention of technological improvement for the industry could be another story. Only if more profit is available could the entrepreneurs, usually the labors' employers, introduce these new technologies. As a result, the industrial technicians are used to taking the profit as their first criteria before the innovation. In this case, the ultimate goal of industrial advancement should be profit maximization and the users should never expect they would obtain more leisure from it.
Furthermore, in science area, these new technology could mainly serve as the stimulation for the peers. It’s meaningful that the current advancement will provoke a healthy competition and encourage the following progress based on it. For instance, the father of the telephone- Alexander Bell is not actually the first one to invent this technique, but obviously the previous work from the Germen scientist inspire him to some extent, finally he succeed to make this cross-generation technique operable.
Above all, more leisure as well as higher efficiency may not always be the first objective of the technological improvement when the target group of the techniques is not normal people.
max940623 发表于 2014-11-12 22:06 static/image/common/back.gif
TS
The technological development continues to increase the human's productivity all the time, which ...
你为什么不听我的 先修改提纲后再写全文呢
你的提纲和思路有问题的情况下写全文不是浪费时间么
91) The primary goal of technological advancement should be to increase people's efficiency so that they have more leisure time.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
没有相关Issue题目。
请回帖时按照指引链接列出英语提纲并用汉语解释并根据指引点评楼上的提纲。 第一个回帖的同学不必点评。
指引链接：https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1777364-1-1.html
TS
The technological development continues to increase the human's productivity all the time, which benefit the mankind. However, its primary goal may not necessarily be the more leisure time pf people. Admittedly, this statement could hold true for the techniques for normal people. On the contrary, specific technology designed for industry may not tend to increase the labor’s spare time, but achieve greater profit. In addition, current technological development could encourage the healthy competition among scientists as well as following advancement.
注意这道题的意思是技术发展的目标是提高人的效率然后有更多的时间。
However, its primary goal may not necessarily be the more leisure time pf people.这句话显然没有准确的回应题目
你将人分类的思路是可行的
但是你的主旨句要紧扣题目
Ts1
The technologies, especially the ones invented for daily use, is primarily intended to improve people's efficiency and therefore save their time. 面向对普通人的技术都迎合了人性的懒惰，所以目的就是提高效率省时间。举例洗碗机洗衣机
你的主题句里没有提到leisure time这个概念 节约的时间会否用来leisure 这是一个关键问题
或许你可以分作三类人来讲
退休的人或家庭主妇 洗碗机、自来水管道煤气都提高做家务的效率 从而有更多时间
新技术提高工人的效率 但是工人还是要工作那么长时间才能获得足够的工资养家糊口 技术的好处被老板占有
第二点挺好
Ts2
However, the primary intention of technological improvement for the industry could be another story. 工业技术能被应用的前提是盈利，导致其首要目的是利益最大化。老板引入新技术，使用者员工生产率提高了但可能不能获得任何更多的空闲时间。
Ts3
Furthermore, in science area, these new technology could serve as the stimulation for the peers. 科技进步对科学界主要是激励的作用，可以促进良性竞争和对现有技术的完善。举例，贝尔并非第一个发明电话的人，而是一位德国科学家生产的不能工作的电话启发了他，最后终于使这个跨时代技术可用了。
不建议你脱离efficiency来讨论 会导致离题
你可以说文献数字化及谷歌学术使查文献更有效率 但是这样一来科研人员要读的文献更多 可以做的科研更多 未必有空闲时间
总的来说 这道题可以写成 同意技术发展的目的是为了提高效率 但是人们能否享受更多悠闲时光 要看具体是谁 在社会中的角色 tesolchina 发表于 2014-11-14 21:48 static/image/common/back.gif
你为什么不听我的 先修改提纲后再写全文呢
你的提纲和思路有问题的情况下写全文不是浪费时间么
谢谢老师点评，你这么梳理一下确实逻辑严谨多了！明天我改写一下提纲再写全文。 tesolchina 发表于 2014-11-14 21:48 static/image/common/back.gif
你为什么不听我的 先修改提纲后再写全文呢
你的提纲和思路有问题的情况下写全文不是浪费时间么
老师，也是那种分情况讨论的写作指导，您看看我这回是否做了正确的回应，谢谢您，也请大家多多批评~ 本帖最后由 黛丝丝丝丝 于 2014-12-15 13:27 编辑
91) The primary goal of technological advancement should be to increase people's efficiency so that they have more leisure time.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
Opening:
Improvement by technological development has permeated our life. Some contend that these innovative developments can be linked with a main desire for more leisure time for our daily life. However, from my point of view, even though these improvements undoubtedly enhance people’s efficiency, whether they could have more leisure time is contingent on what roles are they playing as. Increase on efficiency lead disparage consequence on housewives, normal employees and scientists.
这道题是说primary goal should be ...
因此这里实际上是在讨论科技发展的目标应该是什么 而不是科技发展的实际影响
disparage 这个词有问题 还是老老实实用 different吧
lead to 漏了to :L
what roles are they playing as-> what roles they are playing
(simon)
ts 1. Thanks to involvement of electronic devices for household odds, housewives are enjoying a more flexible daily life without burying themselves with washing and drying. In the old days, my grandma spent more than half of day on washing clothes, dishes and floors, now with the help of washing machines and dish-drying closets she may instead take a walk with grandpa on the morning. Also some of my friends are free from these household jobs and save their time to take a dancing class or have afternoon tea with others.
ts 2. But this benefit has not been equally shared with others like employees especially the blue-collar class. 讲工人只是由手工作业改为了操作机器，但是工作时间和工作强度未必减少。科技的发展只是让employer增长了利润，并未给工人带来更多休闲时间。
ts 3. The progress of technology has not ensured more entertaining time to their own maker—the assiduous scientists. 科学家不断改进研究方法，提高效率是为了能节省时间研究一个theory的更多方面，同时有更多时间去test the theory.
NOTE：经Simon提示，略偏题，不是问【是否节省出了leisure time】，而是【是否科技提高效率之后的目的是Leisure time】，在原例子和分类不变更的情况下，可以讨论housewives/business owner/scientists提高效率的目的的不同。
TS： Technology,mainly served as a tool to facilitate people’s daily life,has always been a heated topic about it’s primary task.Some people maintain that technology is supposed to raise people’s efficiency,therefore,leaving more leisure time for us.Nevertheless,higher efficiency doesn’t necessary mean more leisure time,too,the primary purpose isn’t inevitable making efficiency hike.
主旨句点明全文分论点，科技有很多种，有的科技是为了提高人们效率，有的则不是。其次提高效率并不意味着休闲时间增加，这里存在潜在假设。
ts1:Admittedly,increasing efficiency should be a rather important consideration for technology,on the account of fact that it actually improves our life quality
正文第一段进行让步，举例ProE engineering 提高人们效率，Google一系列产品提高人们效率让人们生活更加轻松。过渡句子：不代表所有的科技都是这个目的
ts2: Technology comprises lots of kinds of technologies,such as genetic technology,agriculture technology and so on and they all serve different primary purpose
科技还有基因科技，农业科技，基因科技的主要目的可以是医疗领域，农业科技的主要领域可以是产生更多肉，都不是直接与人们日常的工作效率有关
ts3:Higher efficiency can lead to various ramifications.Some boss may demand their employees to work same amount of time in order to obtain more net profits
反驳潜在假设，指出更多的老板会压榨员工，导致他们更加累。自己胡诌一个调查的例子用以佐证
附全文 Technology,mainly served as a tool to facilitate people’s daily life,has always been a heated topic about it’s primary task.Some people maintain that technology is supposed to raise people’s efficiency,therefore,leaving more leisure time for us.Nevertheless,higher efficiency doesn’t necessary mean more leisure time,too,the primary purpose isn’t inevitable making efficiency hike.
Admittedly,increasing efficiency should be a rather important consideration for technology,on the account of fact that it actually improves our life quality.For instance,ProE engineering software enable engineers to have a throughout picture and imagination about real product instead of spending much money on build a prototype,which shorten much redundant time.Moreover,Google search engines could not only make people more accessible to internet resource from all over the world,but also assist people to feel more convineient in lots of aspects,such as Google map,Google plus and so on.They all raise people’s efficiency in working environment or common life,however,technology has various kinds that it’s primary purpose can’t be defined easily.
Technology comprises lots of kinds of technologies,such as genetic technology,agriculture technology and so on and they all serve different primary purpose.In genetic technology,it can be applied to medical field and mass manufacturing.By forcing out some detrimental genes,disabled people could gradually deliver a life just like anyone normal.Via injecting fat genes into house stocks,the total production of house stocks could increase to a very stunning level.In agriculture,people use different technologies to improve plants surrounding environment,enhance their healthy condition and anything as long as it’s beneficial to production.It’s safe for us to judge that in these kinds of technologies,the primary purpose does’t have any direct relationship with increasing people’s efficiency.Besides,higher efficiency also doesn’t mean more pleasure time.
Higher efficiency can lead to various ramifications.Some boss may demand their employees to work same amount of time in order to obtain more net profits.On the contrary to making people more accessible to leisure time,this will impose huger burden on people’s shoulders.Because it usually cost people more energy when they are in a high efficiency state,same amount of working time will dry it sooner than before.According to a research conducted by professors who are from University of Berkeley at California.The result shows that 73 percent of people who are involved in this research claim that they feel more tired after working and less leisure time when they are in constantly certain period of high efficient state.
Ultimately,considering various kinds of technology and their corresponding purpose,practical situation when people possess higher efficiency.We can safely tell that this claim given by the issue is too absolute to be truth
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