issue33
Issue33 : Creating an appealing image has become more important in contemporary society than is the reality or truth behind those images.By Vagrent from 无忧GRE
Comments by 李修文
文中精彩词句用蓝色标出
Contemporary society has witnessed an unprecedented change in the pace of life. Almost every aspect of our daily life is featured by rapidness and efficiency. So is the process of getting to know someone. First impression plays a crucial role in many occasions. In this sense, creating an appealing image has gained much importance in our society. However, the reality or truth behind those images bears equal significance and cannot be disregarded.
(作者首先以短暂的社会背景介绍开头)社会节奏加快, 就连认识一个陌生人的过程也加快了.（然后巧妙的引出题目，）就此而言,好的外表已变得更加重要.however,(笔锋一转,提出作者的观点)外表背后的真实仍然不容忽视. 简洁清楚，推门直入。
True, appealing images are beneficial in the sense that people tend to have their judgment at the first sight and even to stick to their (the) opinions from then on. An appealing image does not only refer to one’s appearance, but also includes one’s way of presenting themselves. For example, when an employer is interviewing prospective employees, those good-looking interviewees with eloquence will for most time stand out of the others. Following this trend, many people spend a considerable amount of time and money on creating more appealing images. Many examples are around me. During the job-hunting seasons, everyone pays great attention to the format of their resumes with the hope that the eye-catching form will attract the recruiters’ attention. Ironically, no one seems to care for the real content of their resumes. These examples seemingly confirm the contention that the importance of appealing images outweighs that of the truth behind these images.
(主题句,指出人们注重外表的原因)好的外表所带来的好处,在于第一印象对于人的观点的影响.(拓展外表的外延)好的外表不仅包括外貌,而且包括一个人表达自己的方式.例如,工作面试时雇主们总是偏爱口才好且外貌好的应聘者.因此,人们变得越来越注重外表.人们注意履历表的形式而不是内容.(结尾总结全文)这些例子似乎印证了外表重于内容.
The root cause behind this social phenomenon can be traced back to the long-held belief that “Seeing is believing”; Featured by the fast pace of our contemporary society, there is literally no chance for people to get to know other people or things over the long term. Employers have to decide who to recruit after ten minutes’ interview; voters have to decide who to vote (to vote whom) after each candidate’s ten-minute speech; consumers have to decide which product to buy via comparing the colorful packages. Quick decisions are demanded. No wonder that appealing first impression plays a crucial role in this process. In light of this, no one could deny the importance of good images, and neither could they afford the damage of public images.
(进一步分析人们注重外表的根源)这种观点源于一个老观点”眼见为实”.此外,快节奏的现代社会也不给人们看内容的机会.(非常精彩的排比例证,连续给出了3个日常发生的情况,有极强的说服力)雇主在10分钟的面试之后就得决定要不要人, 选民们在候选人10分钟的演讲后决定投谁的票,消费者决定是否购买商品通过比较它们的包装.(结尾暗合主题句)没人能否认外表的重要性.
However, although creating appealing images is beneficial in the short term, the reality or truth behind these images reveals itself in the long run. It is just like the case of a gift with beautiful wrappers. No matter how amazing is the wrapper outside, the wrapper is destined to be torn away to show the gift inside. So is the case with appealing images. It is agreed upon that one is judged not according to his/her apparent features, but instead, according to the content of his/her character. Viewed in this fashion, charming images can function as the ticket into the world that one craves for. But one's performance is evaluated by their genuine competence and capability instead of their appearances, which are more convincing than mere beautiful appearances.
(话题一转,引出对作者观点的论述)然而,外表只在短期内发生作用,而内容将在长期的范围内决定事务的性质.(精彩,使用比喻来说明道理!)就像一个有着美丽包裹的礼物,不管包装得多么好,包装是注定要被撕掉的.外表都一样.人不是由外表决定的,而是由它的品质决定的.(类比和比喻,无可争议的指出外表和内容的哲学关系)因此,可以说迷人的外表是一个人通往成功的门票,而表演是通过这个人的竞争力和能力来评价的.而这比美丽的外表更有说服力.
To conclude, an appealing image can benefit the first impression and help people initiate their first step on their road to success. But in the long run, it unavoidably yields to the real content behind the image. People with genuine capability should use this method of creating good images to pave their way to success in contemporary fast-paced society. However, one must realize that a total reliance on creating appealing images is doomed to fail, because one is after all judged by the content of his/her character underlying the images.
(结论)总之, 外表有利于建立良好的第一印象,为成功奠定基础.(这一句用于总结文章的前半部)但长远的来看,外表必然要为内容所代替(归结作者的结论).真正有能力的人应建立好的外表来争取成功.然而,(否定论点的负面)我们必须认识到完全的依赖于外表是注定要失败的.(指出正确的观点,紧扣文章的中心)
全文大结构:
1. 开头:背景简介+自然的引出题目+给出作者的论点
2. 指出”人们注重外表的现象的普遍性”+分析”人们注重外表的原因”, 并用例子支持.
3. 深层分析”注重外表”的原因,用例子说明,并指出外表的重要性.
4. 说明内容的重要性,并指出外表与内容的关系.
结论:总结文章23段,深化主题,紧扣原文论点.
全文由不到500多个单词组成。但构筑了一篇逻辑严密，极有说服力的文章；。
Great
很有收获，有空我也贴上来，帮我批一批
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