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标题: lanzhi_gjy 的作文练习 [打印本页]

作者: lanzhi_gjy    时间: 2010-8-12 21:23:52     标题: lanzhi_gjy 的作文练习

本帖最后由 lanzhi_gjy 于 2010-8-12 21:26 编辑

2010年8月12号

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?If you do not make sure other people (especially influential people or your emplyers)know about your strengths and accomplishments,you will never get successful in life?


观点:不同意
提纲:
1、
有很多人并没有得到别人的认可,但是成功了
2、
于此相反的是,有很多人,虽然大家都认可了他,但是他最后还是失败了
3、
其实,成功与否,根本与别人认可与否无关,有的时候取决于我们自己对于成功的定义。

There're a group of people dream to be successful.Then how can we get success?As a famous saying goes:success is equal to a clear goal and persistent efforts.From this saying we can see that whether can us be successful is determined by ourselves and does not have anything with making sure others know about us.So I don't agree with the statement in this topic.Want to succeed?Set a goal and just do it.


To begin with ,I will show you that even others have never been aware of our strenghths or accomplishments, just by ourselves,we still can succeed.Go through our history ,it is filled with such examples. Vincent van Gogh,the famous painter ,who has not been widely accepted during his lifetime ,but after he’s death ,people has realized his intelligence and achievement in art .Now Van Gogh has been regarded as the most great painter in the world .The case is not rare,take Liuxiang for another instance ,Liuxiang ,the winner of the men’s 110m hurdles race in Athens Olympic Games and also the record keeper for 11 years ,his gold medal is the first one has been wined by an Asian in Olymic. However, before he get so successful ,people didn’t know him at all and even his coach did not actually think much about him. But he finally made it .All these indisputable evidences go to show that it is really not required for us to make others know about us can we make success ,we must trust ourselves and keep going ,and when we get success ,people will approve us.

On the contrary, there are also a lot of people who have already make sure other people known about him, but still failed.Take one colleague of my parents for example,the colleague has an enviable background---graduated from Tsinghua University,always was the president of students,won the race in many different international awards and so on.He is always shining.Everyone are optimistic about him,trust him will also get a good score during his career.But he let them down,because he is just an bookworm, can not bear the pressure from the work and finally he has broken down.At the end,only sympathy is left for him.Thus,we can see even one can be approved by others,it is also doesn’t mean that he is really a successful man.As one saying in the movieForrest Gumpgoes: life is a box of chocolate,you never know what you will get the next time.Maybe you are great in these area and all of the people recognize you well.But that is not to say you will get success next time.All you need to do and have to do is never be arrogant,stand on the earth,try your best and never give up.

In addition,I think, when judging if one has really get successful or not,the defination of sucess could not be ignored.Different people have different views on the success.For some one,they regard it as getting others acceptance.Then ,if not,they will never think they has indeed made it even maybe they has already got a high position in the society and has innumerable money, which is the symbol of success in the eyes of some people who are poor and lowliness.For these ones,I have to admit that "yes,only after you make sure other people know about you,can you succeed".But this is an special situation,most of us common people just want a happy and soft life,and for us it is the real success.So how we are looked at by others could never make a big deal.

In sum,many people in the world want to be successful.But all I want to say is, whether we can succeed could not be determined by others' acceptance on us,without it there are many examples has already made great achievements,while even with it,there are also a lot of people failed at last. To be successful, just set a goal,and spare no effort to make it.
作者: lanzhi_gjy    时间: 2010-8-13 12:14:34

本帖最后由 lanzhi_gjy 于 2010-8-13 13:59 编辑

不好意思,昨晚到现在一直都不能上网,我的级别太低,还暂时没有办法上传附件,只好麻烦各位复制下来在帮做修改了。。。

恩,那个,粘贴到word中后,可能还是会有红色的下划线什么的,但是我是改过了的.

所以请随便改吧,谢谢哦~
作者: 王亚冉    时间: 2010-8-13 15:38:13

很认真的小孩么,谢谢你提的建议,我会处理一下,多加些说理部分的~
你的作文我也改好了,第一次写,已经很不错了~
大家一起加油吧~
作者: yezi2010    时间: 2010-8-14 10:42:53

谢谢你给我作文的认真修改,你的作文也已改好,请查收~
作者: lanzhi_gjy    时间: 2010-8-14 18:05:55

本帖最后由 lanzhi_gjy 于 2010-8-14 18:27 编辑

09.08.07NA      Do you agree or disagree with thefollowing statement? Parents should allow children to make their own choicesrather than determine their children’s future for them.




There is only one time for us to live inthis world. We should try our best to experience all the things during our lifetime---happiness, sadness, success, and fail. We should make choices byourselves and also bear the consequences bravely. All of these are the mostwonderful thing in our life. So I couldn't agree more with the statement inthis topic, every child should make their own choices. This is a kind of lifestyle, and only then, it is worthy for the just one time living.



To begin with, I have to say it is veryshort sight for parents to make decisions for their children. Because thiswould lead the children to be lack of their own views on things. Once withouttheir parents, they may feel all at sea when coming up againstproblems. Then it would be quite hard for them to struggle in the society. Takeone of my neighborhood for instance, in this family, parents is the biggestboss. Whatever the child want to do, they would meddle in and tell him"you should do this, you can not do that". As to the kid, he has alreadyused to live such a life. But since time went by, the problems come out. Theirchild can not go to university---the college office set him back because hecould not just take care of himself and the complaint from his classmatecovered every corner.Finally, the parents have to choose quitting for their child.This is a typical example of the parents have a hand in everything for thechildren, and the consequence is also obvious. Want your children to besuccessful, and then let them make decision by him.



Now let us imagine, in the case above, ifthe parents was not so arbitrary and could allowed their child to make his own choices,then what the end is going to be? First, the child would obtain the ability to lookafter himself. Without anybody tell him “today you should wear shirt or aheavier sweater”, he know which is fit to the wheather.Then he will not balledup the dormitory and there would never be the complaint.Second, the child wouldhandle the issue of be sent back by the school office, because, man and boy,everything is dealt with all by himself---face them, choose a solution, andmake it. He know when problems come what should be done, and he would never madehis parents feel worry about him. The last and the most significant is, if healways makes his own choices, such a sad end would never happen to him. And tosuch a man, he will be independent and with the initiative in his own hands,the success always belongs to this kind of person.


Therefore, we can see the consequences forparents to determine the future for their children is serious and how luckywill be if a child is allowed to make choices by himself. But one more point worthmentioning is that the parents also can not give too much freedom to theirchildren, when necessary they should come out and help the kids known about howto tell right from wrong as to prevent them from going astray.
作者: lanzhi_gjy    时间: 2010-8-14 18:08:43

3# 王亚冉

嘿嘿~~我这几天上网很不顺,虽然昨天就下了,但是后来就不能上网了,所以没能及时回复~谢谢你的修改,和建议~我决定不要梵高的例子了,还可以少写很多字。。。就是没有限时,这次还是限时不成功,不过没有写那么多字了。。。
作者: lanzhi_gjy    时间: 2010-8-14 18:16:25

4# yezi2010

嘿嘿,谢谢你的修改和建议,我觉得你改的也很详细,另外,从你们两位身上收获了很多~~

ps:真是不好意思,这么多的拼写和时态错误...下次会注意的~~辛苦喽~~
作者: 2510wangqi    时间: 2010-8-15 10:29:21

文章阅读完毕,赞!
有些问题我在附件中表明了,可以再交流!
作者: jeanne_zj    时间: 2010-8-15 19:47:49

谢谢你的认真修改,你的也改好了~
[attach]149691[/attach]
作者: lanzhi_gjy    时间: 2010-8-17 17:03:19

8月17号,
TV 还是 Telephone
谢谢点评~
作者: joy1025    时间: 2010-8-19 00:45:09

水平有限,见谅。
作者: lanzhi_gjy    时间: 2010-8-19 20:47:45

本帖最后由 lanzhi_gjy 于 2010-8-19 20:50 编辑

谢谢各位,有劳了~~

8月19号

sports teach us lessons
作者: fannie227    时间: 2010-8-20 19:30:41

改得不对的请见谅
作者: lanzhi_gjy    时间: 2010-8-20 20:58:29

8月20号 周五

Advertising is the most important cause of unhealthy eating habits.

谢谢哦~有劳了
作者: jianndqin    时间: 2010-8-21 10:15:27

08-20 改好
[attach]150157[/attach]

我的请狠拍~~
作者: lanzhi_gjy    时间: 2010-8-21 22:42:53

The best way to improve education is to raise teachers’ salaries.

8月21号的,谢谢哦~

唉,快考试了,还是不能限时,愁啊。。。
作者: xqsissy    时间: 2010-8-22 13:10:12

16# lanzhi_gjy

恩,下载了,先占着回头好找! (改之。。。)

我的好容易上传了,这里:
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=1129902&pid=1774295025&page=1&extra=#pid1774295025
请猛拍~对得起我的网络~
作者: cslee    时间: 2010-8-22 23:16:21

cslee 修改! 个人意见,仅供参考啊!
作者: lanzhi_gjy    时间: 2010-8-27 22:12:08

8月27、

University students should take part-time jobs.(Education & Work)

谢谢哦~
作者: S酱    时间: 2010-8-28 00:51:54

本帖最后由 S酱 于 2010-8-28 01:19 编辑

19# lanzhi_gjy
改好了~ 个人建议欢迎回拍
作者: serena-blue    时间: 2010-8-29 06:40:26

your composition is already revised
thanks for your suggestion on my work
作者: lanzhi_gjy    时间: 2010-8-30 22:59:27

综合写作第一篇

tpo12~

辛苦了~非常感谢~
作者: serena-blue    时间: 2010-8-31 15:08:08

童鞋,我赶火车去学校明天交给你修改的作业哦。。。
作者: lanzhi_gjy    时间: 2010-8-31 22:34:19

独立 8月31号

就要考试了,怎么还有这么多问题啊...唉,谢谢了哦~

ps:我的网络有些问题,如果今晚没有帮各位修改,明天一定会的!
作者: lanzhi_gjy    时间: 2010-8-31 22:34:45

综合
tpo13
作者: Julianlod    时间: 2010-8-31 23:14:45

TPO 12 REVISED
作者: lucia85524    时间: 2010-9-1 16:44:07     标题: 8.31 作文修改稿

本帖最后由 lucia85524 于 2010-9-2 00:17 编辑

24# lanzhi_gjy


使用的是word的修订功能,所以没有直接贴修改稿,还是上附件吧。改的不恰当的地方,请指正。


上次竟然忘记传附件,罪过!
作者: TAKAMA    时间: 2010-9-1 16:49:00

赞一个
作者: lanzhi_gjy    时间: 2010-9-1 20:10:11

本帖最后由 lanzhi_gjy 于 2010-9-1 21:57 编辑

9月1号

独立+综合tpo14
作者: longxue26    时间: 2010-9-1 21:56:06

25# lanzhi_gjy

修改完了
作者: louisa427    时间: 2010-9-1 22:59:21

已修改
作者: lizhengjiang    时间: 2010-9-2 07:18:27

这个题目有点怪异 ,内容还是8.31
,,,,
。。。。

哎,看完了就羡慕。
行云流水,一气呵成的感觉。我写作文倒是别别扭扭的。见识了。
没什么改的,有些词改改而已。
恩, 建议你这样的作文人,就不要在作文上浪费时间了。。呵呵
24# lanzhi_gjy
作者: Julianlod    时间: 2010-9-2 11:13:31

看到你的问题了 其实我写的那篇综合写作就听一遍直接写的
所以很多听力细节都没听到 而且我习惯听力先兼顾大意为主 所以我写出来综合写作会有自己总结的感觉
我也把握不好综合写作 上次考也是才有3分的水平 不知道怎么写才是好的综合写作
我觉得总结倒没什么 跟大伙最近讨论过 只要3个点exactly找对应了 然后每个稍加一点一句左右的细节
然后把文章格式结构弄好 应该高分没问题 主要还是听力的问题
作者: dadafan    时间: 2010-9-2 14:46:01

独立作文8.31
作者: FannieHsu    时间: 2010-9-2 15:03:50

改好了
作者: lizhengjiang    时间: 2010-9-4 21:21:26

真不知道怎么感谢
  这样认真的批改,比我女友都要认真。。呵呵
  你做事的态度非常好,由衷地祝你以后人生更加成功。


                    lee 敬上




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