题目：
110815NA One of your classmates needs help with some schoolwork. Which solution would you recommend your classmate should do: to ask you for help or to find a professinal tutor for help. Include reasons and details to in your response.
成文：
With the increasingly accelerating of living and learning pace, the issue of finding effective ways to help students solve their variety of problems has been highly discussed among many educators and students themselves. Nowadays, many students prefer asking their classmates directly rather than turning to their tutors. However, asking their peers for help through thinking over the problems in totally different angles may add more benefit sometimes.
In pockets, majority of students are more willing to get direct solutions from their tutors in order to save valuable time for other things. After all, most tutors always know more than us students do, specifically in the results of students' schoolwork. What's more, only by asking tutors for the answer can students obtain the finally official resolution. Once students fail to choose the most effective solution or fail to think out the precise answer, the direct help from tutors is definitely proper way to achieve the goal.
On the contrary to the benefit mentioned above, turning to tutors for help may not always work well enough. There is an old saying goes like that two minds are always better then one. Discussing the problem with classmates or other peers in depth rather than directly turning to tutors may help build students' ability of analyzing and reasoning. After all, Students attend to school are not only to obtain knowledge but also to form a right habit in dealing with problems, in the term of which it may be more practical to solve problems among students.
Furthermore, sometimes there are conditions that tutors may not give you the proper solutions which even you are not quite with them in any way. Under these circumstances, students may as well think about the problems in different angles and talking with more classmates instead of giving up to tutors directly. For example, many scientists eventually invent valueless things through hard computing and practicing by themselves without knowing the exact results of the problem and often there is no one for them to refer.
In effect, different problems need different ways to solve. The two methods mentioned above can be used properly as follows. Asking tutors for help when you want to ensure the final answers or to search for more useful learning methods, and turning to your classmates or other peers when you are not sure about the results from tutors or just be willing to find more effective solutions to open you minds. In addition, no matter in what way you choose to turn to help, rational analyzing and careful reasoning are of great significance. After all, proper reasoning is the source of creation.
3#wqr619
蹲着的猫，首先lusota要多谢你的各种修改喔~
但是还有一些不太清楚的地方要和你讨论一下啦：
1、我用nowadays引出一般情况下同学们喜欢的一种方式，然后用however转折表示如果同学找我问问题的话我会有如下所列的建议，即：用大众的找同学咨询的方式外加找tutor的方式会更加锦上添花，看情况而定，然后后三段中第一段先肯定一下找tutor的方式，后两段说明有些情况下tutor并不能很好的解决问题或者不能很令你满意，而这时大众化的找同学的方式就很有好处。（主要是视不同问题的情况而定）
2、觉得你改的第三段的衔接句很点睛，谢啦~第三段的那个长句意思是：前半句说明一种情况，即学生上学不仅是为了获得知识，更主要的是为了养成一种良好的解决问题的方法；根据这一点来看，同学们之间互相帮助解决问题就更有实践性了。
3、“Furthermore, sometimes there are conditions that tutors may not give you the proper solutions which even（为啥用even捏？tutor解答不了，甚至你也解答不了？？！！） you are not quite with them in any way.”这句我想说的是学生问tutor的问题有时候他也并不一定清楚，或许他只会给你一个解决的大概想法，还需要你去和其他人一起要讨论研究一下；even后是说有时候可能甚至你自己由于某种原因并不满意tutor 的说法，此时愿意自己再琢磨琢磨等等。
4、最后一段结尾猫给的建议太好了，当时写完就觉得有点小别扭，有点最后才总结的意思，改正啦~
5、总的来说，全文好像是题目确定结构有些异议，希望你能看看我第一点写的是否合理，那就是我全文大概的主旨；另外，我还是不太清楚文章结构怎么样才比较符合T的方式，求指导~作者: sodapeng 时间: 2012-2-4 19:21:14
With the increasingly accelerating of living and learning pace, the issue of finding effective ways to help students solve their variety of problems has been highly discussed among many educators and students themselves. Nowadays, many students prefer asking their classmates directly rather than turning to their tutors. However, (这里转折感觉很勉强啊。前后都是支持 ask peers for help directly, furthermore additionally比较合适吧)asking their peers for help through thinking over the problems in totally different angles may add more benefit sometimes. V
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In pockets, majority of students are more willing to get direct solutions from their tutors in order to save valuable time for other things. After all, most tutors always know more than us students do, specifically in the results of (去掉results of )students' schoolwork. What's more, only by asking tutors for the answer can students obtain the finally official resolution. Once students fail to choose the most effective solution or fail to think out the precise answer, the direct help from tutors is definitely proper way to achieve the goal.. m+ i* t# ^9 t$ {) g7 |
On the contrary to the benefit mentioned above, turning to tutors for help may not always work well enough. There is an old saying goes like that(觉得前面的句子改为as the old saying goes, 这个形式会比较简洁) two minds are always better then (than) one. Discussing the problem with classmates or other peers in depth rather than directly turning to tutors may help build(建议 foster 或cultivate ) students' ability of analyzing and reasoning. After all, Students attend to school are not only to obtain knowledge but also to form a right habit in dealing with problems, in the term of which it(去掉it ,但是还是不太懂lz这个从句想表达啥) may be more practical to solve problems among students.
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Furthermore, sometimes there are conditions that tutors may not give you the proper solutions which even you are not quite with them in any way.（这句神马意思= =） Under these circumstances, students may as well think about the problems in different angles and talking with more classmates instead of giving up to tutors directly. For example, many scientists eventually invent valueless things through hard computing and practicing by themselves without knowing the exact results of the problem and often there is no one for them to refer.
/ Q6 Z* x& B; m0 v4 \& f; e, _
In effect, different problems need different ways to solve. The two methods mentioned above can be used properly as follows. Asking tutors for help when you want to ensure the final answers or to search for more useful learning methods, and turning to your classmates or other peers when you are not sure about the results from tutors or just be willing to find more effective solutions to open you minds. In addition, no matter in what way you choose to turn to （for）help, rational analyzing and careful reasoning are of great significance. After all, proper reasoning is the source of creation.
楼主文字很不错，有些句子很精彩~~学习学习~
就是感觉论点不够明确，ets觉得一篇30min 300词的文章能完整阐述一方面的观点已经很不错了，就是说更偏向于一边倒的论点。当然这也是个人观点，仅供参考~一起加油~！！！作者: Lusota 时间: 2012-2-4 19:51:49
When people need to discuss upsetting or controversial problems with others, some people prefer to use e-mail or text messaging, other like to use telephone or voice messaging. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons to support your answer.
成文：
Choosing a proper way for communicating will definitely develop the efficiency of working and studying. Especially as discussing about some upsetting or controversial problems with people, in my view, directly dealing with it through the telephone or voice message is the first choice.
Most importantly, clearly exchanging thoughts about problems with other people is the prerequisite of satisfactory final result. After all, text messages often just present literally meanings, which may lead to misunderstanding of the other side. It's well known that Chinese language is often ambiguous except that people use different tones to present it in different conditions. And thus, plain text message may mislead people sometimes if they use the opposite tone to read it, which will even lead to a terrible result.
What’s more, under some circumstances, people can adjust their strategy in dealing troubles through understanding other’s attitude, by paying attention to his tones and onomatopoeia. So, through the talk both sides may effectively save from a further trouble.
Taking timeliness into consideration, the second reason for my choice is that in dealing with some troublesome things, talking with people on the phone or leaving a voice message can create a more real atmosphere for communicators to talk directly instead of literally communicating than literally message can do. For example, after having expressed your own thought, the other on the phone can have the opportunity to ask your explanation in depth without delay, which will quickly avoid some unnecessary misunderstanding.
In effect, no matter how controversial or upsetting the problem is, if you directly talk with the other side or leave a voice massage first may be of great significance in reducing some unnecessary trouble during the communication. In addition, paying more attention to the other’s attitude in the talk will effectively relieve increasingly activated atmosphere.
俗话说two minds are better than one. 感谢phoebe的修改建议，这些地方都很值得再推敲，一起加油吧~~~看了你的文后，觉得好像还是text message 的例子能多些，这个telephone我觉得理由好少。。。借鉴啦~作者: lovely_hippo123 时间: 2012-2-5 16:37:26
When people need to discuss upsetting or controversial problems with others, some people prefer to use e-mail or text messaging, other like to use telephone or voice messaging. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons to support your answer.
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Choosing a proper way for communicating will definitely develop the efficiency of working and studying. Especially as discussing about some upsetting or controversial problems with people, in my view, directly dealing with it through the telephone or voice message is the first choice.7 Q2 _+ |5 A) D5 T0 b- W. w
Most importantly, clearly exchanging thoughts about problems with other people is the prerequisite of satisfactory final result. After all, text messages often just present literally meanings, which may lead to misunderstanding of the other side--好. It's well known that Chinese language is often ambiguous except that people use different tones to present it in different conditions. And thus, plain text message may mislead people sometimes if they use the opposite tone to read it, which will even lead to a terrible result.-得这个论点狠好哇哈。
What’s more, under some circumstances, people can adjust their strategy in dealing with troubles through understanding other’s attitude, by paying attention to his tones and onomatopoeia. So, through the talk both sides may effectively save from a further trouble.
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Taking timeliness --哇，这个也好啊。。。into consideration, the second reason for my choice is that in dealing with some troublesome things, talking with people on the phone or leaving a voice message can create a more real atmosphere for communicators to talk directly instead of literally communicating than literally message can do. For example, after having expressed your own thought, the other on the phone can have the opportunity to ask your explanation in depth without delay, which will quickly avoid some unnecessary misunderstanding
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In effect, no matter how controversial or upsetting the problem is, if you directly talk with the other side or leave a voice massage first may be of great significance in reducing some unnecessary trouble during the communication. In addition, paying more attention to the other’s attitude in the talk will effectively relieve increasingly activated atmosphere. X7 e- o0 `2 o; _
我帮楼主分配一下，
1.电话是一种直接的表达方式，有效率的传达感情，比如说语调上，text没有办法表达，造成误会
2.并且通过电话，听话的人，可以根据说话者的语气，给予更准确的安慰
3.只有通过电话，说话的人才能得到最快的安慰。
我觉得楼主的观点都好好。。。感慨啊。。。。看来好多遍，语法上面没有找到什么问题。一起加油啊。
红色-advice
紫色-excellent 作者: Lusota 时间: 2012-2-5 23:35:30
第一次改作文，自己水平也不是很好，如果有改错的地方请原谅~
Nowadays, due to the increasingly developed level of globalization,（感觉有点拗口，是不是改成increasing development of 更好） people are faced with various problems which may unavoidably bring some unpleasant changes to their life consequently. By gradually aware（by 是介词，是不是应该用awaring，这个我也不是很确定） of the situation, compared to the possible further aftermath of doing nothing, catering to the revolution and discovering the advantages of these changes may be more beneficial to us.（不是很懂这句话） Thus, in this case, moving to a new environment is actually the proper way for me.（之前一直用us，这里也用us可能会更加统一）
It is generally known that trying to adapt to the totally unknown surroundings with no people are familiar to（感觉用with更好，to倾向于被动） you at the very start is something that sounds quite unimaginable, but as a matter of fact, nobody is going to be confined in one place for his whole life. What's more, without new catalysts（不理解这个词放在这里的意思） in unknown places to force（to force 改成forcing 不然感觉成分缺乏） a man to move on, the man itself（himself） and even society would not be more and more progressive now. In this way, people's sight in making new friends and appropriately maintaining their friendships may be developed with the change. Therefore, people will quickly make new relationships (make ralationships 貌似搭配不太对)in the new place.
As for the old friends, there is no way for time to draw them away from us. After all, we have many approaches to keep in touch with our old friends now. Moreover, with the gradual progress occurred on us, we may know more about how to keep our friendships more firm（firmly）. As I said, moving to new places may add more benefit to people and likewise will firm our old friendships after experiencing the tests of time and distance. Take（taking） my close classmate for example, we are used to be studying in the same school and the friendship between us is so firm that our parents all take us as their own children. However, in a way that is not expected she had to move to a remote place because of her father's sudden changing of job. Forced by the reality, we have to keep touch with each other by exchanging emails, talking on the phone, and traveling together in elsewhere. After undergoing numerous tests, we are （more closer）close to each other as before and thoroughly aware of the importance of our valuable friendship.
Apart from all the issues mentioned above, it is undeniable that the future is unknown and challenging, and accordingly people actually have no idea about the good or bad fortune of our choice at all. A saying goes like that good or bad we must all live. And what's more, we had better be more active in leading our life. Only by opening our eyes(broaden our horizons) and constantly enriching our experiences can we make the future seem more clear.
In conclusion, with the increasingly rapid development of capability of human being, friends are available anywhere in anytime. Thus, bravely choosing the new place to begin a new life is no longer a terrible choice for people now.
感觉层次很清晰，一些转折的词用的很棒！学习，学习！除此之外，对于题目中的关键词的替代种类也很多，有一些我用橘黄色标出来了，自己写的时候想了很久也没想到几个。。。失败。。。作者: Lusota 时间: 2012-2-9 09:38:59
本帖最后由 Lusota 于 2012-2-9 09:49 编辑
20#stancy_zhang
那个，be familiar with 指sb.对sth.熟悉
be familiar to 指sth.对sb.来说是熟悉的
根据文中的句式，好像用后者更符合一些，你说呢？
还有，上一句其实上传后就发现错误了，把compared with 笔误写成compared to了。。。惭愧啊~
1、Currently, although the higher educational system isstill not so satisfactory that everyone will totally acknowledge, the fact that it has been gradually developed toward a more mature system isconspicuous (这第一句话读得有点云里雾里). Moreover, it is undeniable that the basic function of all theinstitutions are teaching their students limited knowledge and helping traintheir various skills, the latter of which relatively contributes to thestudents' better performance in their future careers. Therefore, it is a boundduty for institutions to get students prepared for their careers.
2、It is well known that time in college or university isa significant period between that in the middle school and the society. First,students in middle school can build the intellectual ability and store abundantbasic knowledge, both of which are laying the foundation for their highereducation. Then, after students changing into undergraduates or graduates, itis time for them to use the knowledge and skills accumulated during the periodof learning in middle schools to further travel in the vast ocean of their ownmajors. Accordingly, in this process, preparing these students for somethingmore higher is the main task. To favorably step into the future career, gettingenough preparation from the teachers and the society itself is the veryobjective mentioned above, just like the goal of middle school is alsopreparing their students skills for further future.
3、Even that not only education institutions enablestudents to be more qualified for their career but the society can also givethem relative experience, the practice of college or university is apparently theeasier one. For example, a friend of mine, who has graduated from the college （若非特指某所大学，这个冠词the可以去掉） in two years, once told me that without higher education for further preparationhe would not have the strength to be a successful white-collar. Moreover, afterexperiencing the tough days to find proper career, he found that struggling inthe society without enough preparation is unimaginable harder. Thus, thepractice of the former one （which one?） is obvious （obviously?） the more beneficial one.
4、In conclusion, college or university should getstudents more prepared for their future work. In this way, the course of tryingto be qualified for the future career may be more easy and practical.
1、Currently, although the higher educational system is still not so satisfactory that everyone will totally acknowledge those accomplishments, the fact that it has been gradually developed toward a more mature system is conspicuous.(developing 好像这句话跟文章没什么关系。。背景吧，也像不大有关系的背景，我可能没理解) Moreover, it is undeniable that the basic function of all the institutions are teaching their students limited knowledge and helping train their various skills,(基本任务是教有限的知识，感觉怪怪的，我也不知道哪里不劲。。) the latter of which relatively contributes to the students' better performance in their future careers. （这个which是指代什么的哦，直接the latter好像就行了）Therefore, it is a bound duty for institutions to get students prepared for their careers.
2、It is well known that time in college or university is a significant period between that in the middle school and the society.（between that不对吧） First, students in middle school can build the intellectual ability and store abundant basic knowledge, both of which are laying the foundation for their higher education. Then, after students changing into undergraduates or graduates, it is time for them to use the knowledge and skills accumulated during the period of learning in middle schools to further travel in the vast ocean of their own majors.（to accumulate 时态） Accordingly, in this process, preparing these students for something more higher is the main task.(谁的task。。More+higher..什么叫让学生准备的更高。。没理解) To favorably step into the future career, getting enough preparation from the teachers and the society itself is the very objective mentioned above.just like the goal of middle school is also preparing their students skills for further future.
3、Even that not only education institutions enable students to be more qualified for their career but the society can also give them relative experience, the practice of college or university is apparently the easier one. For example, a friend of mine, who has graduated from the college in two years, once told me that without higher education for further preparation he would not have the strength to be a successful white-collar. Moreover, after experiencing the tough days to find proper career, he found that struggling in the society without enough preparation is unimaginable harder. Thus, the practice of the former one is obvious the more beneficial one.
4、In conclusion, college or university should get students more prepared for their future work. In this way, the course of trying to be qualified for the future career may be more easy and practical.
With the increasing advancement of the era today, in that（去掉） the capacity for(of） independent thinking is an indispensable factor for the public to judge a person. Therefore, fostering a sense of independence is of great importance, which should be executed by educational system and parents as well. As for parents, their main responsibility is help to encourage their children to be independent thinkers, such as doing their homework by themselves or doing something within their power.
Nowadays, the cultivation of children's integrated qualities is a pressing task. As the most important character of the qualities, independence should be built up beginning from children's early study years. Take homework for example, it is an undeniable fact that there are various puzzles in children's homework, however, these problems are often offered to develop children's thinking and reasoning ability, and at the meantime, children who have no train of thought at all may had better ask their teachers for help in order to broaden one's scope of mind. Accordingly, the remaining homework is offered to train their proficiency of intraday knowledge. As for this kind of homework, parents had better not to be involved in the process of children's thinking.
Due to the mortality of people,感觉这个好突兀，无缘无故就冒出来了 and that parents are also unavoidable, children can not depend on their parents for the whole life. For this reason, children are encouraged to deal with problems by themselves as possible as they can. Hence, 太急着hence了doing homework on their own is the very means of train, and the effect of which is often the best, as what we say, exerting a subtle influence is always the most effective way. For example, no children are born to be capable of speaking language, but with the subtle influence of the surrounding environment created by their parents感觉逻辑。。, children often learn quickly. On the contrary, as for foreigners who want to learn a second language, they have to need a lot more time to be skilled because there are no enough language environments for them.
In conclusion, it is parents' responsibility to encourage their children to do homework by themselves in order to build up their independent ability. As a matter of fact, without excessive care from parents, children may grow to be more independent than we think.
30#shibin11
the capacity for independent thinking 是固定用法，你可以查webster。
in that 之前本来还有一句，后来删掉那个就忘了把in that 删掉了。作者: Lusota 时间: 2012-2-11 10:21:22
29#nikiniki333
it is undeniable that the basic function of all the institutions are teaching their students limited knowledge and helping train their various skills， the latter of which relatively contributes to the students' better performance in their future careers.
我给你提取主干后看一下，the basic function is teaching and helping train..., the latter of which contributes to ...如果latter后面没有which的话，这就不是一句话了，which是指代the basic function的！
还有，也许我说的不太明确，但是是指学校教给学生的是有限的知识和各种技能，而后者相对来说更有利于未来事业的发展。
`& Z- a
2、It is well known that time in college or university is a significant period between that in the middle school and the society.
that 在这里是是代词，that 是和后面的in相连的，相当于that of
3、 it is time for them to use the knowledge and skills accumulated during the period of learning in middle schools to further travel in the vast ocean of their own majors.再提取一下主干，...to use the n. accumulated during ... to ...这里的accumulated是个后置定语而已，修饰the knowledge and skills，这个后置定语后面的during那一句是时间状语，再后面是宾补。作者: wqr619 时间: 2012-2-11 15:03:40