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标题: 【写作特训---BY LYNX】 [打印本页]

作者: Felislynx    时间: 2012-5-29 12:43:01     标题: 【写作特训---BY LYNX】

本帖最后由 Felislynx 于 2012-6-3 22:29 编辑

作文很烂,语法也是菜鸟,基础薄弱,希望大家多给意见撒。每天都会认真写作文地>_,感谢重新振兴写作特训!
作者: Felislynx    时间: 2012-5-29 12:44:06

5.29作业上交



Our own experience has revealed that old people can give the right guidance because they have more experience by get through the long days .we can ask to elderly people mentor young people,and encorage them to write their stories and advices for the next generation.However, the elderly people's experiences are very valued which direct young people in many ways,but sometimes they are out of date,and can't follow the trend of society.

Many young people always go into raptures at the merely mention of buying fashion clothes.They enjoy wearing  in for cosmetics and fancy dresses,and always like go to shopping with their friend as they have the same taste in cloths.Therefor,hey would love to hear their friends thoughts when they choose the fashion clothe or the other new things.In contrast,young people don't like take the advice by elderly people gave ,because elderly people are conservative in outlook,and  having old-fashioned opinion in cloth.They always blame  the young‘s  dresses are  too flashy, too provocative, too casual, too tight or too revealing.

Furhermore,old people is stubborn in accepting new things.they  don't know how to  use mobile phone and doesn’t have an internet connection.Even so ,they are not willing to learn .Thus, young people glade to  accept the views of  high-technology and anything new by their peers rather than the old.

On the other hand,old people all have one thing in common: they consider problems only in the light of their personal experience.For example:many parents  often interfere with their chldren's love life by implanting some ingrained thoughts like money problems, and also the best tall, cool, even it is necessary to rich, and would o find a stand that can be controlled by their own men.

Another reason for the young are happy to accept advices from people in their age is  elderly people often put on a display of  blame-storming when they give some adives for young people,obviously, they don't realized  it is  important that they be gentle and kind in their suggestions.But  this  condition merely appear among the young people,they   give advice or make suggestions sincerely .

In conclusion,i don't think that all the advices given by older people  more valuable than from people our age,because of the experience of age, in things that fall within the compass of it , directs them; but in new things, abuses them.

作者: 水果的夏天    时间: 2012-5-30 09:16:15

Our own experience has revealed that old people can give the right guidance because they have more experience by get through the long days .we can ask to elderly people mentor young people,and encorage them to write their stories and advices for the next generation.However, the elderly people's experiences are very valued which direct young people in many ways,but sometimes they are out of date,and can't follow the trend of society.

Many young people always go into raptures at the merely mention of buying fashion clothes.They enjoy wearing  in for cosmetics and fancy dresses,and always like go to shopping with their friend as they have the same taste in cloths.Therefor,hey would love to hear their friends thoughts when they choose the fashion clothe or the other new things.In contrast,young people don't like take the advice by elderly people gave ,because elderly people are conservative in outlook,and  having old-fashioned opinion in cloth.They always blame  the young‘s  dresses are  too flashy, too provocative, too casual, too tight or too revealing.

Furhermore,old people is stubborn in accepting new things.they  don't know how to  use mobile phone and doesn’t have an internet connection现在很多老人也用手机电脑喔.Even so ,they are not willing to learn .Thus, young people glade to  accept the views of  high-technology and anything new by their peers rather than the old. i6 B& T9 X! ^% X* i6 H
On the other hand,old people all have one thing in common: they consider problems only in the light of their personal experience.For example:many parents  often interfere with their chldren's love life by implanting some ingrained thoughts like money problems, and also the best tall, cool, even it is necessary to rich, and would o find a stand that can be controlled by their own men这段需要的例子更加详细点就好.$ O5 w# r2 m( c- q
2 o( g- Q& S% k/ r+ {6 S& d

Another reason?? for the young are happy to accept advices from people in their age is  elderly people often put on a display of  blame-storming when they give some adives for young people,obviously, they don't realized  it is  important that they be gentle and kind in their suggestions.But  this  condition merely appear among the young people,they   give advice or make suggestions sincerely .4 q' h5 V! y) T6 @, K5 E/ ]
In conclusion,i don't think that all the advices given by older people  more valuable than from people our age,because of the experience of age, in things that fall within the compass of it , directs them; but in new things, abuses them
作者: 水果的夏天    时间: 2012-5-30 09:21:14

总结 楼主其实坚持的决心给我了很大的鼓励。 但是作文感觉整体比较混乱。然后感觉好像什么都说了点但是什么都没说清楚的感觉。 这些属个人观点,如有改的不好的地方请多多指教。
作者: 竹叶结    时间: 2012-5-30 11:01:42

已经改好,多交流啊!
作者: Felislynx    时间: 2012-5-30 11:02:01

4# 水果的夏天

谢谢~~我再好好想想
作者: Felislynx    时间: 2012-5-30 12:35:02

5.30综合写作 tpo10

   The reading passage explores the issue of the cause of  otter population decline.The professor's lecture deals with the same issue.However,she thinks that the predation hypothesis is the mainly reason ,which contradicts what the reading states.And in the lecture,she uses three specific points to support her idea.

   First,even though the reading passage suggest that pollution, such as oil rigs and other sources of industrial chemical is the mainly reason lead to decrease the otters' population,the professor argues in the lecture that the predation hypothesis is the best explanation.This is because someone could find the dead sea otters'body washing  off  on the beach if it cause by pollution, but the other way round in reality.She thinks that  if sea otters is eaten by a predetar immediately,so it can not wash on the shore.


Second, the reading passage states that enviromenttal pollution affects not only the sea otters death but also  the other species sunch as seals and sea lions were declining.At the same time,the  posibility of occurring predators like orca might be small because they dislike to hanting the small .In contrast, the proffesor said that orcas begin to hunting  otters to change their diet  due to whales decline by human hunting.So it probably is the orcas that are causing the decline of all the smaller sea mammals mentioned in the passage


   Finally,the listening passage asserts that it is not cause by pollution,besause In those locations that orcas can access easily, the number of sea otters has declined greatly. On the other hand, in those locations that orcas can not access such a shallow beach,the number of sea otters remained stable.But the author still said uneven pattern of otter decline due to the pollution hypothesis because of pollutants along the coast.

作者: Felislynx    时间: 2012-5-30 21:22:44

本帖最后由 Felislynx 于 2012-5-30 22:06 编辑

5.30独立写作

   Happiness is not based on external status,  not wishing for what we do not have, not just having lots of money in our hand.That's my understanding of the word"happniess".Thus,i think  that even the world has changed fast, ,people  can not say happier than before.


  Psycological studies suggest that  the result of the  social investigation in some economically developed cities shows the lower levels of happiness.At the same time ,according to the statistics,the incidence of depression in nowadays   is ten times than in the past and an decreasing age at onset of depression has been observed attributable to cases.“Why we are getting richer and still unhappy?”This is a question not only in  China ,but also all of the world.  


    Modern society development is rapid, the life rhythm of people is faster and faster, the lifestyle of people also is changing sadly .People are too anxious is the mainly cause of the lower levels of happiness.They worry about housing purchase ,education for their children, the burden of  old-age pension or  much working pressure, even dealing with the problem of getting along with friends and colleagues  be the cause of press.Furthermore,  eagerness not only for money but also for pleasure drags people too much; some can overcome these desires, others can not.In this materialistic society,  the outside world there are too many temptations.You bought  a house then want to a bigger,you got a job then want to a better, you have money then you want to more.But happiness is not just depend on external statusIf desire full of your heart,  happiness  will slip away.

To sum it up, people along with huge pressure and big desire,they are less happy  is certainly clear .Even though living standards have improve,the scientific and technological level  have raise .With the economic development,  people truly get more than past, but it is not replace that  happiness has promote.

作者: liang0603    时间: 2012-5-30 22:35:10

lz加油!
作者: liang0603    时间: 2012-5-31 12:19:41

lz加油!
作者: 竹叶结    时间: 2012-5-31 19:14:35

已经改完!
作者: 竹叶结    时间: 2012-6-1 17:14:35

昨天改完,太急,忘了给你传了。
作者: 竹叶结    时间: 2012-6-1 17:16:09

汗   原来给你传过了啊
作者: Felislynx    时间: 2012-6-2 19:37:54

本帖最后由 Felislynx 于 2012-6-3 22:21 编辑

~
作者: Felislynx    时间: 2012-6-2 19:38:48

6.2独立写作---------[bDo you agree or disagree with the following statement? People now are easier to become educated than in the past.]


There are some main reasons for agreeing with the statement that people now access to education easily and it is convenient for people to study than in the past.

In the past,only man has the right to receive education and achieve the success in studies. Fortunately, during the past two decades, the education of women has been booming in practically all countries,which means a level playing field with respect to education has been established.  "For example: since  the founding of the People’s Republic of China in 1949, women have been encouraged into education and careers and instilled with a strong work ethic.What's more,the government has support the programme financially to help people from poor family to become educated.This is a way to broke the traditional concept: only nobility or wealthy family can enjoy the right of receiving education.


On the other hand,the diversification of learning methods is another reason for people to get an education easily.For one thing,if you want to study language,internet has provided a better platform for self-learning online instead of going to the school for studying through tools like academic journals , forums or open courses,internet gives everyone the opportunity to learn or study their foreign speaking skills on an international level.For  example,many public libraries in the country also a good place,which have numbers of book for learning. People can get a wide range of information and materials about any knowledge. Anyway,  educational insititution has developed to enroll many more students than before.


In present time, income and educational achievement are related, which means with economic progressing ,people who are financially rich  can afford more training,and may find higher quality of education more available than in a past poor areas .


For above reasons, we can safely conclude that people in this age can receive education easier than in the earlier age.And i believe that the trend will be more obvious with the development of the society.

作者: Felislynx    时间: 2012-6-3 22:20:22

6.3z作文(自选题目了0 0,早上没看到出题)

When we talk about how take care of our family better ,make them happy ,health, comfortable is first thing we think about . Thus, whether live in rural area or a big city for looking after our parents and children is an issue open to debate.In my opinion,living in cities to taking care of our family  is better than live in rural area.
     The social facilities includes that  high quality of medicare and social security ,it can help people take their parents of better. Because advance in medical technology in cities can make it possible for old people to live longer .In addition, many Elderly care facilities developed by government supporting offer sick care and daylily-life care for old people who can't take themselves of well. Furthermore, well established legal system in cities,such as endowment insurance system and pension insurance fund is more complete than in rural area. if old people's late-life in cities, they do not worry about being sick and cost of medical  too much.
      Easy communication with family members is another advantage in cities. Compare with a rural area without telephone or internet, more convenient method in cities like mobile phone ,online chatting , to communicate with our family when emergency .For another ,public transit also a fast way to visit our relitive or take children to school, because  many different means of transportation such as magnetically-levitated trains,subway, bus, taxi couldn't appear in poor rural areas.Thus,we are more close to our family members in big cities.
     I admit there may be have some advantage of taking care family in rural area.Because nice environment with  fresh air, streams through in font of your house,no noise pollution and traffic jam,it can help people relax and good for our health.Even so, going on a journey or visiting our family still spent a very  long time because of terrible transportation facilities.
     In conclusion, i would agree with people who live in the city can take care of their family better than people live in rural area.

作者: 秋雨荆州    时间: 2012-6-4 00:43:27

看来明天要早起发布作文题
作者: Felislynx    时间: 2012-6-4 12:06:58

6.4作文----Colleges or universities should offer more courses to prepare students for the future before they


I entirely agree that colleges or universities should offer more course for students to preparing future before they enter the society and start working by following reasons.

        In first place, it can benefit the student because of with school being the last stop before they enter society, students urgently need help from the school to prepare them better for the job market. For one thing,these course can help student for making career choice due to students hardly know about what they want to do in the future. If  a universitiy offer different kinds of course ,such as Financial , Business , Technology ,wich has more detail contexts of career prospects and not just  the knowledge in textbook,  will help students clearly recognize the condition of working after they graduating .
        
        A second,it also can benefit the society-to help student make better transition from school to workerplace. Thus provide more qualified workers with both need skills and mental readiness-improve the productivity of the society.It is clear that students who abundance of working experience as a result failure in working place even can not find a job is a usual situation in present So,colleges and universities should offer more social practice courses, internship working and contact with big companies for sutdents to gather experience.

        Third, it can benefit the school. If a school's graduates can find ideal jobs,this will boost the school's reputation among its potential applicants,and can thus attract better students. For example: the statistical data shows that colleges and universities which has these course for student to prepare future with applications high than  the normal universities among the colleges that have equal University rankings. Hence, an excellent example that student get job from famous company also can be a symbol on the university's reputation .to attract more better students.
        
In conclution, those course not only can help students but also are beneficial to colleges and society .So l totally agree with this opinion.

作者: 秋雨荆州    时间: 2012-6-4 23:47:33

16# Felislynx
作者: wpc302    时间: 2012-6-5 14:45:47

[attach]178506[/attach]已改
作者: 竹叶结    时间: 2012-6-5 16:12:22

已经改好!




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