Argument9 熊熊组的作业嘞～

duckyl35UID: 201612

9The following appeared in a memorandum from a dean at Omega University.

"Fifteen years ago, Omega University implemented a new procedure that encouraged students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness of all their professors. Since that time, Omega professors have begun to assign higher grades in their classes, and overall student grade averages at Omega have risen by thirty percent. Potential employers apparently believe the grades at Omega are inflated; this would explain why Omega graduates have not been as successful at getting jobs as have graduates from nearby Alpha University. To enable its graduates to secure better jobs, Omega University should now terminate student evaluation of professors."

提纲：
1导致教授给高分的其他可能性；
2就业率不高的原因是雇主认为分数贬值，存在其他可能性，如经济萧条
3两所大学的错误类比，很可能A大的毕业生的专业正是当时的市场需求（应该还有其他可能性，但一时想不出来了，帮忙想想咯！：）

The arguer claims that in order to enable the graduates in Omega University get better jobs, the school should terminate student evaluation of professors immediately. To support the argument, the arguer illustrates that after implementing a new procedure which encouraged students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness of all their professors, the student grade average have risen by thirty percent, which causes the potential employers thought that the grades at Omega University are inflated, at last leads to the lower employment rate than Alpha University. After a careful examination about the argument, we will find several critical flaws.

In the first place, the arguer fails to provide any other possible reasons for why Omega University professors assign higher grades in their classes. As we know, the function of evaluation of those professors is to evaluate the quantity of teaching, which can improve the real ability of students. Maybe the new procedure achieves a good efficiency, the students really get more from their professors, obviously, the higher grades should be given to the students. Or maybe during this period, the final test paper is easy for students, they can finish it very well, apparently, they can get a high mark. The arguer fails to think about those possibilities, so the conclusion is untenable.

Secondly, the arguer concludes too hastily that the reason why Omega graduates have not been as successful at getting jobs as have graduates from nearby Alpha University due to the potential employers’ believes that the grades at Omega are inflated. Even though students at Omega University get a higher mark which is thought to be inflated, this is the only reason why the employment rate is low? Maybe the city is during a great depression at that time, workers who have been employed for several years might stay at home let alone the new graduates who lack working experience.

Thirdly, besides that, the arguer establishes a false analogy between those two universities. Are they similar in every aspect? Maybe the graduates from Alpha University are good at some speciality which is just weak point of Omega University’s student, but this speciality is in favor of the employment. Unless the arguer excludes this possibility, the conclusion is unwarranted.

To sum up, the argument is not persuasive as it stands. To make it more convincing, the arguer should inform us the true reason why the professor give higher grades to their classes. In addition, to make the conclusion more persuasive, the arguer should exclude other possibilities for the lower employment rate in Omega University.

:)

[ Last edited by staralways on 2005-8-7 at 22:37 ]

neo_athrunUID: 2111270

The arguer claims that in order to enable the graduates in Omega University get better jobs, the school should terminate student evaluation of professors immediately. To support the argument, the arguer illustrates that after implementing a new procedure which encouraged students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness of all their professors, the student grade averages have risen by thirty percent, which causes the potential employers thought that the grades at Omega University are inflated, at last leads to the lower employment rate than Alpha University. After a careful examination about the argument, we will find several critical flaws.　(段首应该已经是一定的模式了，挺好没说的了)
In the first place, the arguer fails to provide any other possible reasons for why Omega University professors assign higher grades in their classes. As we know, the function of evaluation of those professors is to evaluate the quantity of teaching, which can improve the real ability of students.(evaluation对于学生的real ability 是怎么个improve 法呢？没想明白~) Maybe the new procedure achieves a good efficiency, the students really get more from their professors, obviously, the higher grades should be given to the students. Or maybe during this period, the final test paper is easy for students,　(这里的easy没说透，什么原因更简单了呢？也有可能是evaluation把教授们吓得哦呵呵) they can finish it very well, apparently, they can get a high mark. The arguer fails to think about those possibilities, so the conclusion is untenable.

Secondly, the arguer concludes too hastily that the reason why Omega graduates have not been as successful at getting jobs as have graduates from nearby Alpha University due to the potential employers’ believes that the grades at Omega are inflated.　(太长的从句了～好像少了动词，due to 不能作动词吧？) Even though students at Omega University get a higher mark which is thought to be inflated, this is　(is this 好一点) the only reason why the employment rate is low? Maybe the city is during a great depression at that time, workers who have been employed for several years might stay at home let alone (好词！)the new graduates who lack working experience.

Thirdly, besides that, the arguer establishes a false analogy between those two universities. Are they similar in every aspect? Maybe the graduates from Alpha University are good at some speciality which is just weak point of Omega University’s student, but this speciality is in favor of the employment. Unless the arguer excludes this possibility, the conclusion is unwarranted. (这个句式好,闪光阿！)

To sum up, the argument is not persuasive as it stands. To make it more convincing, the arguer should inform us the true reason why the professor give higher grades to their classes. (这句话不好，关于给分高的reason作者其实已经暗含了，就是evaluation，所以应该换成the actual reason 或者别的什么)In addition, to make the conclusion more persuasive, the arguer should exclude other possibilities for the lower employment rate in Omega University.

总体不错，很清楚，没有大的错误。
语言嘛和我一样应该还有提升空间哈哈
关于错误类比，还有个思路，就是Ｏ大学的毕业生办公室和劳动市场的关系处得不好，导致本校毕业生经学校推荐也没有太的出路

[ Last edited by neo_athrun on 2005-8-7 at 20:45 ]