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标题: 〓DIES IN FLAMS〓 Issue7 by cjlu [打印本页]

作者: cjlu    时间: 2009-4-7 22:23:35     标题: 〓DIES IN FLAMS〓 Issue7 by cjlu

本帖最后由 cjlu 于 2009-4-7 22:26 编辑

      It is said that nowadays the technology of video camera improved rapidly. And with the aspect more and more people come to use video instead of writing something, the camera takes an important role in our contemporary life. It seems that video camera will take the part of all the written record as the form of documentation.


      We must say. The camera has its great advantages at recording. But we must also agree writing do some better use than it.Let’s see some outstanding performance about the two appliances. First, the video camera is becoming widespread and practical because of the easy use and hi-technology. Everyone can record what he want not only convenient but also clear. In one hand, you can take every available scene in your videos with the camera. On the other hand, every video can be very clear taking the benefits of this technology. Just like the movies and documentary films, so authentic they are and can take us into a montage world. However, we must value the characteristics of written record.

      Globalization is the most important advantage of writing. What’s more, the author can join his own understanding in the article intentionally or accidental. The truth may be more colorful just with these gifted words. Many literatures can take our hearts into a dream world easily. I think it’s a firm evidence of the good of written record.


      And everything has two sides, mostly the advantages also made the shortages. As its hi-technology, videos can’t be saved for a long time, so every some years we should take them out and copy them to new one, just like what FOX do last season; they remake almost half of the films in their storehouses. At the same time, the writing has its own problems to solve. The literature is too hard to be objective. In addition, more and more teenager writers start their writing career. Lots of people who are not their generation may get their idea with difficulty. So it’s a big problem to get ideas without the personal influence of writers in some articles. The actual state of affairs will be lost by the words of authors.


In the fact, this is not a question that we must alternate only one, both are our answer. We can use the camera to record the real truth in videos, And at the same time use our pens to write down what we are thinking about. Cameras and pens should work together to make up the weaknesses of each other. The only goal is we must record our contemporary life not only clear but real in soul.


      At present, the high speed of technology has swallowed a lot of culture and humanity. But it’s not her fault. Our human beings must know that they are not enemies. On the contrary, we need to promote everyone at the same time. Our life would be more wonderful.


作者: 米饭袜子    时间: 2009-4-10 16:54:18

It is said that nowadays the technology of video camera improved rapidly. And with the aspect more and more people come to use video instead of writing something, the camera takes an important role in our contemporary life. It seems that video camera will take the part of all the written record as the form of documentation.

We must say. The camera has its great advantages at recording. But we must also agree writing do some better use than it(诶,发现其实不在开头点明观点放在这里也挺好地^ ^.Let’s see some outstanding performance about the two appliances. First, the video camera is becoming widespread and practical because of the easy use and hi-technology. Everyone can record what he want not only convenient but also clear. Inon^^ one hand, you can take every available scene in your videos with the camera. On the other hand, every video can be very clear taking the benefits of this technology. Just like the movies and documentary films, so authentic they are and can take us into a montage world. However, we must value the characteristics of written record.
Globalization is the most important advantage of writing(很新的观点,不过读到这里不明白为什么全球化就是个最好的证明?详细阐述一下说不定会是个很好的观点,只有观点不恩那个说服人^^). What’s more, the author can join his own understanding in the article intentionally or accidental. The truth may be more colorful just with these gifted words(这个观点也很不错^^). Many literatures can take our hearts into a dream world easily. I think it’s a firm evidence of the good of written record.

And everything has two sides, mostly the advantages also made the shortages. As its hi-technology, videos can’t be saved for a long time, so every some years we should take them out and copy them to new one, just like what FOX do last season; they remake almost half of the films in their storehouses(e …这个观点和tracy一样,你这里也提到了保存问题,这个。。。窃以为实在有点牵强,不管是video还是written records都不好保存,都要花费大量精力和银子的说,以此作为论据说video的不好不太有说服力^^) At the same time, the writing has its own problems to solve. The literature is too hard to be objective(这个也是和tracy的观点一样,我是不赞同的,话说video亦可以造假,且比written records更甚,而且又是只提了一下没有具体论述^^). In addition, more and more teenager writers start their writing career. Lots of people who are not their generation may get their idea with difficulty(这个例子不是很好,难理解是代沟问题,不是written records本身的问题,而且这里和题目所说的记录人类生活已相去甚远^^. So it’s a big problem to get ideas without the personal influence of writers in some articles. The actual state of affairs will be lost by the words of authors.

In the fact(in fact^^), this is not a question that we must alternate only one, both are our answer(??). We can use the camera to record the real truth in videos, And at the same time use our pens to write down what we are thinking about. Cameras and pens should work together to make up the weaknesses of each other. The only goal is we must record our contemporary life not only clear but real in soul.
(汗一个,你第二段首句让我以为你的观点是倒向文字咧,这里咋成了中立了。。。。)

At present, the high speed of technology has swallowed a lot of culture and humanity. But it’s not her fault. Our human beings must know that they are not enemies. On the contrary, we need to promote everyone at the same time. Our life would be more wonderful.

?结尾小诡异的说,跑了。。。。。。。)
Summary语言不错,流畅也米多少语法错误
我对JJ对题目的论述提一哈看法,全文列了列V&W的好处,缺点,最后来个combination(还米说怎么个combination,combination了有啥好处云云),实在有点奇怪,我到最后也不知道JJ对这问题的看法,难道是从combination那段来看?如果是,那这个观点亮的也太靠后了,我还以为第二段首句就是你的观点了诶
再者文中提到得那些无论是好处还是缺点都有点表面,关于这点你可以参考下cmjJJ的观点,这是我们俩BS时她提出的,我觉着很有道理我想了想,那些W有的没的,v没的有的,罗列出来也不能解决问题。我们要得是good record。跟那些优缺的对比没啥关系,关键是优缺所反应的东西的区别把?  
就是因为有优缺才有区别
两个都不是完美的东西,花太多时间评价好坏好像没啥意义


有问题尽管揪米饭!!^^
作者: 米饭袜子    时间: 2009-4-10 16:55:12

痛恨这个编辑!!晚上给JJ重新贴昂~抱歉~
作者: tracywlz    时间: 2009-4-10 23:03:47

本帖最后由 tracywlz 于 2009-4-11 21:44 编辑

It is said that nowadays the technology of video camera improved rapidly. And with the aspect more and more people come to use video instead of writing something, the camera takes an important role in our contemporary life. It seems that video camera will take the part of all the written record as the form of documentation.



We must say.(太口语了)
The camera has its great advantages at recording. But we must also agree writing do some better use than it.Let’s see some outstanding(不妥)
performance about the two appliances. First, the video camera is becoming widespread and practical because of the easy use and hi-technology. Everyone can record what he want not only convenient but also clear. In one hand, you can take every available scene in your videos with the camera. On the other hand, every video can be very clear taking the benefits of this technology. Just like the movies and documentary films, so authentic they are and can take us into a montage world. However, we must value the characteristics of written record.must的使用应该减少,太绝对,太主观了,句式还不错


Globalization is the most important advantage of writing. What’s more, the author can join his own understanding in the article intentionally or accidental. The truth may be more colorful just with these gifted words. Many literatures can take our hearts into a dream world easily. I think it’s a firm evidence of the good of written record.


And everything has two sides, (换句话)mostly the advantages also made the shortages. As its hi-technology, videos can’t be saved for a long time, so every some years we should take them out and copy them to new one, just like what FOX do last season; they remake almost half of the films in their storehouses. At the same time, the writing has its own problems to solve. The literature is too hard to be objective. In addition, more and more teenager writers start their writing career. Lots of people who are not their generation may get their idea with difficulty. So it’s a big problem to get ideas without the personal influence of writers in some articles. The actual state of affairs will be lost by the words of authors.


In the fact, this is not a question that we must alternate only one, both are our answer. We can use the camera to record the real truth in videos, And at the same time use our pens to write down what we are thinking about. Cameras and pens should work together to make up the weaknesses of each other. The only goal is we must record our contemporary life not only clear but real in soul.




At present, the high speed of technology has swallowed a lot of culture and humanity. But it’s not her fault. Our human beings must know that they are not enemies. On the contrary, we need to promote everyone at the same time. Our life would be more wonderful.


连接词的使用太少了,使得本文缺乏条理性,结构性。其他还不错。加油






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