Recently the problem has been brought into focus (on) what decide a proffer’s salary. Many schools are faced (被动语态用在这不是很妥哦!)with such a dilemma that whether they should pay teachers according to their students’ performance. With every aspect taken into consideration, I believe that students’ achievement decide their teachers’ emolument would be a better choice.(这句话表上看起来是没问题的,但实际上在逻辑上是不合理的,不是学生成绩决定教师的酬金,而是影响。). i, (H( z5 l } ( \1 T1 u3 s {! x, M First of all, teachers’ salary lies on the students’ performance is a highly efficient way for universities to pay for their faculty. When this way is fixed, the schools have not to come up with so many complicated ways about paying wages to their teachers. (这句话没看懂!)In some universities, a professor must to finish several academic papers with high quality every year, in order to earn the extra allowance .Consequently some teachers consider to giving up teaching in order to finish their thesis whole heartedly. These decisions reduce the working efficiency of both schools and teachers undoubtedly. However if the school have a united way in paying salaries, such as take the students final scores into account ,it will increase the efficiency of both sides.全段是在说教师酬金按学生的成绩来分配会有效促进教学和研究,是吗?这个说法的正确性值得进一步考究!)% \$ \% p, i) e9 y1 X7 v - Q7 K( r$ X& o0 H$ g/ K Moreover, the quality of education in a school should be given primary importance among priorities. When a professor’s final wage is closely related to the students’ achievement, s/he must pay more attention on the students. Suppose that in a university, a professor’s final salary have nothing to do with the students’ achievement, how many time do you think the professor will spend on the teaching and what the students will be in such environment? It is not surprising that boys will play computer games day and night and girls will addicted into parties or something else. While study maybe will become the latest thing they will do. So to understand the significance relationship between teachers’ salary and a schools’ final education quality, it will be more likely to agree with that idea. (从评价的激励性来论述,不错!) Most important of all, when teachers’ paying is interrelated with their students’ final performance, they may increase the communication time with the students for improving their understanding in some fields. A high school in my hometown used to make a rule that if a teacher adds three discussion times in the class, then s/he would get five percent bonus at ends of the year. Even this rule sound ridiculous to some people, it contributes a lot in improving that school’s atmosphere. The teacher could have chance and time to know about the real reflection from the students and the students could have opportunities to rise up their questions in some courses. From this case, those benefits can not without that reasonable rule. Certainly, I can not deny that it may be unfair way to make a fixed relationship between students’ score and their teachers’ emoluments. Since some students may not be interested in learning and some students have a limit on how much they can learn. However, to link teachers’ wage with students’ achievements benefits a lot. Form what has been discussed above, we may safely draw the conclusion that this relationship is a smart way in some aspects.*(Maybe I pay more attention to the content of this essay, actually, I think it's an academic article, we should use some evidences to support our view. The structure of the article and the aim of it should be clearly demonstrated. As for the grammar of these sentences, I haven't pointed out more than logical structure. Please understand me! Your essay is good that be worth my study.) |
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