标题: 0910G[North America Flying] Issue13 by whtkd [打印本页] 作者: whtkd 时间: 2009-6-2 22:37:06 标题: 0910G[North America Flying] Issue13 by whtkd
many of the world's lesser-known languages are being lost as fewer and fewer people speak them.the government of countries in which these lannguages are spoken should act to prevent such languages from becoming extinct.
Is it the responsiblity for government to act the main role to prevent the langugaes from being extinct,as the speaker asserted? it is true that languages are in danger of extincetion from people daily life for fewer and fewer people to use it.I agree with the former one that lesser-kwon languages are being lost as for seldom using it .
first of all,language is the unique to present the culture.different region with various languages bring about the distinctive respective aspect including custom ,convention. way of life .those are all legacy as begining of language to shape their own handed down by ancestors.consequencely,the more languages are not used ,the more distinctive cultures are lag behind ours .similarly,some custome or convention start from at the beginng for people to participate in those activity .as the development of science and technology .peoplee are try to pursuit the prevailing culture is so-call fashion. in the respect of language,due to the main languages was spoken as the international language ,English or french.but forgeting some language from small coutry which is regarded as useless or out of day.the trend of culture is alway dominating by follow people .we can see for the language major in university .approximatly 80 percent of student choose English as their own major ,on contrary ,some languages for small country such as arabic few student study. going after the trend of growing society ,student choose English as their major concerning about there is more opportunity to find a job after their graduated .
farthermore ,there is other factor to expain why lesser-known languagtes are being lost .as the foregoing mentioned that people pursuit the prevailing culture and become more pragmatic to bring their own interest. however .due to the different the language are spoken by different people ,and the migration is to blend and max of culture .the most important of all,with the globaliation bewteen each coutry .therfor people have to turn to more widely used languague putting aside their own dialect.to use the main language to communitcate with foreigner for making them to be better accepted by the society. there is language inherent factor be survival and other was being obsoleted .it is the role fits are suvivie in the end.
admittedly ,it is a vital resource to prevent the language being lost by government and take some affirmative measures into pratice to adverse this situation.it is easy for government to offer sufficent financial support and manpower to make record and study of the losing languages when language is on the brink of extinction. the economic and political of language barriers outweigh the benefits of preserving a dying language,for government should take all-round consideration into economy and policy to bring back benefit.should government spent a sum of money to prevent the language while shifting their responsiblity ,that is-- to impove the well-being of people and the pressing social problem
to sum up ,preventing the language from extinction is a pride of task to reserve the heirloom and legacy not only to enrich harmonious culture ,but also to preserve certain idea that only some languages properly convey,nevertheless .government should devont its time and resources elsewhere,and leave it it the people themself to take whatever steps are needed to preseve their own distince language .only them unerstand the their language for sharing same culture know how to make a method to develop language.作者: lzsile 时间: 2009-6-3 10:03:05
many of the world's lesser-known languages are being lost as fewer and fewer people speak them. the government of countries in which these lannguages are spoken should act to prevent such languages from becoming extinct.
Is it the responsiblity for government to act the main role to prevent the langugaes from being extinct,as the speaker asserted? it is true that languages are in danger of extincetion people daily life（in daily life） for fewer and fewer people to use it（可以去掉，和第一段话重复）.I agree with the former one that lesser-kwon languages are being lost as for seldom using it （？？？）.
first of all,language is the unique to the present culture. different regions with various languages brings about the distinctive respective（为啥我觉得这俩词大意有点重复）
aspects including（such as） custom ,convention. way of life （可改成life style）.those are all legacy as begining of language to shape their own handed down by ancestors. consequencely,the more languages are not used , the more distinctive cultures are lag behind ours （left out by us）.similarly,some custome or convention start from at the beginng for people to participate in those activity（这句话不是很懂啊） . as the development of science and technology . people are trying to pursuit the prevailing culture which is so-called fashion.
in the respect of language, some languages were spoken as the international language such as English，french.but some language in small countries which is regarded as useless or out of day were forgotten. the trend of culture is alway dominated by follow people . approximatly 80 percent of student choose English as their own major ,on contrary ,some languages for small country like arabic were studied by few students. Going after the trend of the growing society ,student choose English as their major concerning about there is more opportunity to find a job after graduation .
furthermore ,there is other factors to expain（去掉） why lesser-known languagtes are being lost .as the foregoing（previously） mentioned that people pursuit the prevailing culture and become more pragmatic to bring their own interest（去了吧）. however . different language are spoken by different people ,and the migration is to blend and max culture .the most important of all, with the globalization between each country（这句话真的看不懂） .therefore people have to turn to more widely used language putting aside their own dialect. then they can use the main language to communicate with the foreigners. That makes them to be better accepted by the society. there is language inherent factor be survival and other was being obsolete .it is the role fits are survive in the end.
抱歉啊，前三段读得相当吃力，估计也是我阅读不好的原因，还有lz的句子不知道哪里是断句，可能也是时间太赶得原因，我作文水平很烂，可能会有改错了的，lz再看看
admittedly ,it is a vital resource to prevent the language being lost by government and take some affirmative measures into practice to adverse this situation. it is easy for government to offer sufficient financial support and manpower to make record and study of （去）the losing languages when language is on the brink of extinction. the economic and political of language barriers outweigh the benefits of preserving a dying language, for government should take all-round consideration into economy and policy to bring back benefit. should government spent a sum of money to prevent the language while shifting their responsibility ,that is-- to improve the well-being of people and the pressing social problem （这段读得稍微顺了一点，但是有些句子之间缺少关联词）
to sum up ,preventing the language from extinction is a pride of task because reserving the heirloom and legacy not only enrich harmonious culture but also preserve certain idea that only some languages properly can convey, nevertheless .government should devout its time and resources elsewhere, and call on people themselves to take whatever steps needed to preserve their own distance language .Because only them can understand the their language， sharing the common culture know benefit finding a way to reserve languages.
这段的语法错误已经改了，感觉lz爱写很长很长的句子，建议可以看看复杂句的构成什么的，也许加上关联词以及了解一些特殊句子的构成之后，文章就会好很多，不然可能读起来稍微生硬，像是从中文直译过来的。还有就是，现在我对G作文也不是很了解，所以对于是否符合g文的写作规则以及方法等现在还没啥建议哈，所以，lz先担待些，改错了请指正 ;)作者: haunteagle 时间: 2009-6-3 10:52:45
Many of the world's lesser-known languages are being lost as fewer and fewer people speak them. The government of countries in which these languages are spoken should act to prevent such languages from becoming extinct.
第一段比较简洁，观点明确
Is it the responsible for government to act the main role to prevent the languages from being extinct (extinction?), as the speaker asserted? It is true that languages are in danger of extinction from people’s daily life, for fewer and fewer people to use it. I agree with the former one(former one 比较唐突，因为前面并没说什么是前什么是后) that lesser-kwon languages are being lost as for（这两个词为什么可以这么用？分别表示什么？这是我问的一个问题，不是修改，感觉没错但我不太明白） seldom using it.
这段说得有些内容似乎与第一段有所重复，比如说因为说的人少了，许多语言正渐渐消失。
First of all, language is the unique（the+unique表示名词我不确定可不可以,感觉别扭） to present the culture. Different region with various languages bring about the distinctive respective aspects including custom, convention, and （加the？）way of life. Those are all legacy， as beginning of language to shape their own（不明白？） handed down by ancestors. Consequently, the more languages are not used, the more distinctive cultures are lag behind ours（有点费解，凭什么这么说呢？） .（另外，the more…not…有点别扭，可以用the less） Similarly, some custom or convention start from at the beginning for people to participate in those activity（什么activity，those指那些？好像没说清，也有可能我没看懂哈）. As the development of science and technology, people are trying to pursuit the prevailing culture is so-called fashion, in the respect of language, due to the main languages was spoken as the international language, English or French. but forgetting some language from small country which is regarded as useless or out of date(不确定day是否可以). The trend of culture is always dominating by follow people .we can see for the language major in university. Approximately 80 percent of student choose English as their own major, on contrary,some languages for small country such as Arabic few student study. Going after the trend of growing society ,student choose English as their major concerning about there is more opportunity to find a job after their graduated .(这段的后面这一部分关于为什么英法语开始盛行，似乎与该段主题language is the unique to present the culture有所偏差，后半部分应令起一段)
Farther more, there is another（何来另一个？上一段中心不是the unique to present the culture？所以上段后半部最好再起一段，不然这就混乱了） factor to explain why lesser-known languages are being lost. As the foregoing mentioned that people pursuit the prevailing culture and become more pragmatic to bring their own interest. However, due to the different the language are spoken by different people, and the migration is to blend and max of culture .the most important of all, with the globalization between each country. Therefore, people have to turn to more widely used language putting aside their own dialect. To use the main language to communicate with foreigner for making them to be better accepted by the society. There is language inherent factor be survival and other was obsolete. It is the role fits are survive in the end.
该段分析语言为什么会消失比较清楚，有理。
Admittedly, it is a vital resource to prevent the language being lost by government and take some affirmative measures into practice to adverse this situation. It is easy for government to offer sufficient financial support and manpower to make record and study of the losing languages when language is on the brink of extinction. The economic and political of language barriers outweigh the benefits of preserving a dying language, for government should take all-round consideration into economy and policy to bring back benefit. Should government spent a sum of money to prevent the language while shifting their responsibility, that is-- to improve the well-being of people and the pressing social problem
粉清晰有理
To sum up ,preventing the language from extinction is a pride of task to reserve the heirloom and legacy not only to enrich harmonious culture ,but also to preserve certain idea that only some languages properly convey, nevertheless .government should devote its time and resources elsewhere, and leave it the people themselves to take whatever steps are needed to preserve their own distinct language. Only them understand the their language for sharing same culture know how to make a method to develop language.
楼主的文章对我来说已经很好啦~希望我也能早点写成这样。
我实在是水平有限，所以改得可能有很多错误或不恰当
的地方，原谅！另外，要是改得不对或有什么问题的地方，Q我哈，这样我也能再提高下，谢谢啦~
还有，楼主的拼写错误是在是有点多，建议下次写完先word下~作者: ccrobin000 时间: 2009-6-3 15:53:36
Is it the responsible for government to act the main role to prevent the languages from being extinct (extinction?),零敲碎打的暂时发现一个地方，being后面应该是被动语态，语言应该是被灭绝而不是语言很无聊自己要灭绝自己，所以认为此处应该是extincted作者: ccrobin000 时间: 2009-6-3 15:57:41
First of all, language is the unique（the+unique表示名词我不确定可不可以,感觉别扭） to present the culture. Different region with various languages bring about the distinctive respective aspects including custom, convention, and （加the？）way of life依然零敲碎打，第二段这里应该是the way of life 单数名词不能直接出现必须跟个冠词或者物主代词，当然也可以用ways of life不加the作者: ccrobin000 时间: 2009-6-3 16:00:23
6#追忆2009
as beginning of language to shape their own（不明白？） handed down by ancestors. 这里是否应该是as the beginning表示在起初？shape sth. down是个短语么？孤陋寡闻，求教一下，如果是短语这句应该就缺个the而已作者: ccrobin000 时间: 2009-6-3 16:02:13
依然零敲碎打，第二段这里the more languages are not used应该用there be句型吧作者: ccrobin000 时间: 2009-6-3 16:04:47
还是第二段的 Similarly, some custom or convention这里明显应该是customs和conventions因为用了some 水平有限，问题找的都比较琐碎如果说的没错的地方希望还能自己整理一下作者: ccrobin000 时间: 2009-6-3 16:09:14
第二段这句的确够费解Similarly, some custom or convention start from at the beginning for people to participate in those activity以我多年Chinglish写作的经验来开好像是想说传统和文化起初让人们参与进来和上面哪个东西的情况相似?望LZ解答一下作者: ccrobin000 时间: 2009-6-3 16:16:23
As the development of science and technology, people are trying to pursuit the prevailing culture is so-called fashion, in the respect of language, due to the main languages was spoken as the international language, English or French.
这句语法貌似不太对啊As the development of science and technology某从句忽略，主语应该是people吧，谓语是are后面是trying to。。。。应该是类似宾补之类的，不过后面居然又出现了一个谓语我觉得应该是trying to pursuit the prevailing culture， that is so-called fashion这样后面的是做前面。。。。的某culture的同位语从句解释一下人们追求的某culture
至于后半句 in the respect of language, due to the main languages was spoken as the international language, English or French.
个人觉得应该另起一句，主谓宾都全了作者: ccrobin000 时间: 2009-6-3 16:26:08
第四段第二句问题不少啊It is easy for government to offer sufficient financial support and manpower to make record and study of the losing languages when language is on the brink of extinction.
就语法上来说 when language is on the brink of extinction.应该是are明显是复数，如果不用languages就应该用the language，单数名词不能单独用要跟冠词，文中还有其他类似错误，望以后注意，前面说to make record应该是records多个languages用一个record怎么够应该record无论从语言上还是什么都应该是复数，还有一点就是这个有明显中国英语的痕迹，记录语言，不过record这个词又能做名词又能动词，这里要表达的意思应该是record the unrecorded part of such languages，不过应该有更牛的词汇替换但是make record这种表达应该是欠妥的作者: ccrobin000 时间: 2009-6-3 16:30:29
To sum up ,preventing the language from extinction is a pride of task
这个是最后一段第一句，保护濒危语言后面应该是a task of pride，of这种结构号称叫做后置定语，中文翻译时候应该是把of后面的放前面也就是骄傲的任务（注意后置定语的of应该翻译成“的”），但是你的写法翻译是任务的骄傲明显不合逻辑，of结构的后置定语洋人很喜欢，应该多用，而少用that 或者which什么的引起的定语从句作者: ccrobin000 时间: 2009-6-3 16:33:10
not only to enrich harmonious culture ,but also to preserve certain idea that only some languages properly convey, nevertheless 最后一段这里前面应该加逗号和上面说骄傲任务那部分构成并列形式，否则语法上恐怕有毛病（但是我不知道具体叫什么毛病），如果有了逗号会形成这样两句
preventing the language from extinction is a pride of task
preventing the language from extinction is not only to enrich harmonious culture ,but also to preserve certain idea that only some languages properly convey, nevertheless作者: ccrobin000 时间: 2009-6-3 16:38:35
最后一段最后一句Only them understand the their language for sharing same culture know how to make a method to develop language.
应该是only they 为什么要用宾格呢还有 understand the their language 这里倒是用了冠词，但是还有一点要记住，用了冠词就别用代词这里应该把the去掉