20天托福110分---旅狼的作文修改铺子

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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Having a job working with other people is better than having a job alone.

Nowadays, an increasing number of people emphasize the improtance of teamwork in the workforce.However , also many managers point out that  indepent work  should be of the priority since teamwork is not always more efficient and Overemphasize on the teamwork will creat too much reliance on others.
  
First and foremost, teamwork is not always more efficient than indepent work especially when they are poorly organized.For instance, once in a biology class , a 30 minutes discussion on the cell wall synthesis was assigned to our group,four students. Then the reality is that we  took advantage of that 30 minuts to talked about the lastest scandles and the shock death of Micle Jeckson, totally ignored the exsitance of the topic. Thus, since then,I feel quite doubt about the saying that teamwork is the most effective way to finish a task.

In addtion,Overemphasize on the teamwork will impare the responsibility that the worker should have. Phycologist once point out that there is a trend of the indivisual among a group of people to ignore the certain work they has to perform. It is easy to be understand just considering the case when one truck is broken on the road. No one would come to the driver to give him a hand because they always think that other people would come and help him.Therefore, sometimes the group work will vague the certain responsibility the member should cherish.

According to my comprehesion , It is somewhat blind to say that teamwork is always better than an independent work .We should emphasize more on our own personal ability than the reliance to other people .

可以说是第一篇写得还凑活的文章。。。
貌似LZ 今天有很多文章要看也  看的过来不？？

061308011UID：2635385

30 分钟时间好短啊 我构思2.3 分钟就只能写出270 字的文章了 够不？

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63# 腾格里旅狼
“第一段最后一句话好长，但是，就算是看到最后，我依然不明白你的观点。这事many managers的观点，你的观点呢？”
我末段According to my comprehesion , I。。写我自己的观点 难道LZ 觉得衔接不自然？？


( |* b, d3 j9 C+ K" a7 O/ t- m& r
”通篇看来，你的文章不缺少例子，但是缺乏使用例子的经验和技巧，另外，你的议论太少。还要加强练习啊。“
CAN'T AGREE　ＭＯＲＥ　看了OG 后我觉得自己文章最大的问题在于body paragragh 不充实（话题发展） ，议论未展开导致文章冗余处比较多。 I will pay attention to them next time .


低级语法错误好多。。汗...

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LZ 建议很好 今天再发一篇 看看有长进否 :lol  辛苦了。。
巴郎第4套的 TOPIC many people believe that it is important to make large amount of maney ,While others are satisfied to earn a comfortable living ,Analize each viewpoint and take a stand .

Nowadays, monthly salary is an important concern for those job hunters to determine  which career to participate in . While on the other hand , others put the life standard priority to the possession.Different group of people weigh distinctively to the two factors .

For on thing,Youngster with great ambition tend to request a job with intense laber as well as payback.From their point of view, salary is the first indicator of their ability and social statue. Therefore, how many the y earned represent how much respect they will receive  from their peers. Besides, Generally speaking, youth are always with passion to realize their ambitions and dreams, they tend to work more hard than those elder people without too much concern of the ease of life. The harder one works ,the higher he will be paid.

For another, Adults and other people with an emphasis on the life quality will usually pick up those easy works with an modest income. They pay more attention to the maintaining good family atmosphere , harmonious relationship with coworkers ,the leisureness of the working pace,  the coziness of the working environment etc. To them , these satisfaction can not be replaced by money and other possessions.

For my part , As a typical youth, I fall into the first catalog without any doubt . Since personal value  is always my highest concern and I always warn myself not to be assimilated by those who have a keen on relaxation, I will definitely  choose a chanllenging work . I work hard and at the same time, receive a decent pay which provides me with a good reputation among my peers , why not ? To me , making money is not my primary purpose,but a decent pay gives me good reputation and fame. I am glad to take it.

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字数仍然徘徊在300 左右  我觉得自己打字速度不慢 但不知道为什么每次时间都觉得不够 这次也是花2分钟左右构思文章思路。 可能打字错误路过高影响了速度。。

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同意与否renewable resources of energy (sun,wind,water) will soon replace fossils fuels such as gases,oil,and coal?

Previously, few people mention the term "energy" ,But nowadays, with the widespread energy crisis and the invention of new power utilization, the issue of the displacement of renewable resources such as sun,wind,water to fossils fuels such as gases,oil,and coal has heated.As for me,I believe that  it is the irreversible trend that fossil fuels are doomed to be edged out by renewable resources because of their limited storage and polluting nature.

First of all ,fossil fuels have exposed a plethora of  inborn disadvantages.The most serious shortcoming is the limited storage. It is a common sense that coals, oil, are mainly formed by deposit of ancient plants, and so is the principle of the formation gases. Since they are unrenewable --once burned, they vanish--the limited storage has already could not afford the large amount of energy required by human activities.Therefore, the energy crisis drives human beings to explore new energy sources. In addition,the over-utilization of fossil fuels has already generated a meriald of serious environmental problems. Burning too many coals is the main reason for global warming and acid rain,which melt the Antarctic iceberges and erode architectures and crops.The tremendous environmental degradation also calls for alternative energy resources.

Then with the advancement of physical and geological science , we used our wisdom and invented many technology to take  advantage of other natural resource which those shortcoming of the fossil fuels can be avoid. Sunshine is inexhaustible. We will never worried that one day the earth will be short of sun light. So are wind and water. Besides, compared with fossil fuels, the utilizations of these natural resources are cleaner and environmental friendly. They will not generate unpleasing smells or poisoning  chemicals. All of these advantages are selfexplaintalry to the irresistible trend of displacement of renewable energy  to the fossil fuels.Actually many country has already reached the consensus and run programs to further investigate and popularize the application of these new power supply.

Over the past century, human beings have already paid a heavy lesson for the plundering utilization of fossil fuels . And now renewable energies provide us an vision to break away the shadowiness of past and build a better society. The fossil fuels will be deserted very soon.

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ok, thx a lot ~