[i习作temp] issue26 -- my first article [复制链接]

waxima
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电梯直达

楼主

发表于 2004-11-25 23:28:47 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

Most people would agree that buildings represent a valuable record of any society’s past, but controversy arises when old buildings stand on ground that modern planners feel could be better used for modern purposes. In such situations, modern development should be given precedence over the preservation of historic buildings so that contemporary needs can be served.
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Most of the society have come to realize the historical value of old buildings. Some times, however, people may face the dilemma whether to maintain the old ones or to make better use of the land for modern purposes. In my opinion, it is not a matter of choice but how to link the past with the presence perfectly.

We all agree that historic buildings are priceless treasures from our antecedents. They not only take records of the past life, but embody the advance of civilization as well for their broad involvement of art, techniques, engineering and many other aspects of human life. It is our pride and obligation to preserve them. But it is also true that people at present need more space for social development: modern buildings and better city layout which grant people better life. For the limited land and the progress of the society, we have no alternative but to build our modern life on the ruins of the past. No separate choice between the two situations will give a satisfactory solution. But if we take a close look at the conflict, it is not difficult to find the deep relationship between them

First, it is easy to realize that today is part of history. It is not the opponent but the successor of the past. The history of Eiffel Tower tells a vivid story of such transformation. A controversial project from the start, the tower was scorned by prominent members of French society who feared it would resemble "a gigantic kitchen chimney dominating Paris" and would "eclipse by its barbarous mass". Consideration of the tradition and grace of Paris resulted in the violent protest against the construction of the modern tower which signed the boom of Industrial Revolution. Luckily, Eiffel's project nevertheless went forward. Nowadays Eiffel has become the most famous construction and symbol of the city of Paris. Too modern to be compatible with the old city at one time, Eiffel eventually made its way to the remarkable status in the history of the city.

Second, advanced architectural techniques and designs can help us find better use of the old buildings so that they can remain the old style while serve the modern purposes. Same in Paris, Louvre Museum is a good example of perfect combination of old buildings and modern architecture. Built in the 13th century, the Louvre is the palace of history and art, venerable and graceful. But during the rehabilitation, with his glass pyramid the famous architect Ieoh Ming Pei took over the first major part of the modernization concept for the museum. It caused considerable controversy right from the outset of the project. Finally however, it turns out that the amazing and bold design of pyramid does not harm the elegance of the Louvre at all. Instead, it add to its ancient style the modern elements of light and brilliance, while serve its function as main entrance, letting a delightful golden light filter through the glass surface illuminating the floor below.

Even without modern architectural techniques, we can also find proper use of old buildings. Take Shanghai for example. There are many old warehouses built in the 19th century along the bank of Suzhou River. With the factories moving to the rural area, these old buildings in city center once became abandoned. Later, many artists rebuild these warehouses into small workshops. With neat but delicate decoration, old buildings are brought to life again and now become part of the city’s new scenery.

Modernization does not necessarily mean destroying the past. Old buildings are not incompatible with modern life. With innovative ideas and advanced architecture, we are constructing buildings that will be remembered by history and endowing old ones new life as well.

My CAT is on 12.22, but I just started, so ... it's seems to be quite pressing now. Any way, I will try my best.
And thank you very much for helping me with my writing.

Reach for the sky

Because if you should happen to miss

You will still be among the stars

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zzfalcon
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沙发

发表于 2004-11-26 17:14:51 |只看该作者

粗看了一遍，只是第一句话有语法错误。观点不错，事例也很好，想必看了不少书。第一部分(3p)我感觉说服力不强，后面两部分(4,5p)感觉可以合在一起，再精简一下。
总的来说还可以，至少比我的好。顺便问一下，是文科的么？

【2025FALL】全站祈福已开放~~来领祈福章，求offer得offer

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waxima
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板凳

发表于 2004-11-28 21:36:19 |只看该作者

非常感谢对我的文章提出修改意见！
资料是找了很久啊，所以写着篇文章得时间......不提也罢，反正都说第一篇会写很久的，就着样自我安慰了。。。
第三段却是有点麻烦，因为想要说明historical building的价值以及与现时需要的冲突，但是因为冲突不是重点所以想略写，结果就写成这样了。。。还是文字功底不行啊，让我再改改。
至于4，5段我觉得不能并，因为两端得分论点不同，都写在第一句了。
我是理科生啊，所以看到issue真的很头痛，不去找一堆资料根本没法下手，sigh......

Reach for the sky

Because if you should happen to miss

You will still be among the stars

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zhujing
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地板

发表于 2004-11-29 18:53:44 |只看该作者

Most of the society have come to realize the historical value of old buildings. <The values of old buildings have been realized in most societies> Some times, however, people may face the dilemma whether to maintain the old ones or to make better use of the land for modern purposes. In my opinion, it is not a matter of choice but how to link the past with the presence perfectly.

We all agree that historic buildings are priceless treasures from our antecedents.<most of us would agree that historical buildings are priceless heritage from our antecedents> They not only take records of the past life, but embody the advance of civilization as well for their broad involvement of art, techniques, engineering and many other aspects of human life. <They not only take records of the past, but also embody civilization advancements as well- we see from historical buildings the accomplishments in the art, techniques, engineering, and especially human experiences> It is our pride and obligation to preserve them. But it is also true that people at present<people today/people in contemporary society> need more space for social<societal> development: modern buildings and better city layout which grant <facilitate a better life>people better life. For the limited land and the progress of the society, we have no alternative but to build our modern life on the ruins of the past. No separate choice between the two situations will give a satisfactory solution. But if we take a close look at the conflict, it is not difficult to find the deep relationship between them <是否可精简些？>

First, it is easy to realize that today is part of history. It is not the opponent but the successor of the past. <?> The history of Eiffel Tower tells a vivid story of such transformation. A controversial project from the start<Being controversial at beginning>, the tower was scorned by prominent members of French society who feared it would resemble "a gigantic kitchen chimney dominating Paris" and would "eclipse by its barbarous mass". Consideration of the tradition and grace of Paris <The notion of preserving tradition and the grace of the city Paris> resulted in the violent protest against the construction of the modern tower which signed <signal>the boom of Industrial Revolution. <感觉‘the’用得太多> Luckily, Eiffel's project nevertheless went forward.<?> Nowadays Eiffel has become the most famous construction and symbol of the city of Paris. Too modern to be compatible with the old city at one time, Eiffel eventually made its way to the remarkable status in the history of the city.

Second, advanced architectural techniques <construction techniques> and designs can help us find better use of the old buildings so that they can remain the old style while serve the modern purposes. <Secondly, advances in modern civil engineering can help to improve the structural integrity of old buildings, therefore it is possible to hire them for modern purposes and at the same time save them> Same in Paris, Louvre Museum is a good example of perfect combination of old buildings and modern architecture. Built in the 13th century, the Louvre is the palace of history and art, venerable and graceful. But during the rehabilitation, with his glass pyramid the famous architect Ieoh Ming Pei took over the first major part of the modernization concept for the museum. It caused<raised> considerable controversy right from the outset of the project. Finally<,> however, it turns out that the amazing and bold design of pyramid does not harm the elegance of the Louvre at all. Instead, it add to its ancient style the modern elements of light and brilliance, while serve its function as main entrance, letting a delightful golden light filter through the glass surface illuminating the floor below.

仅在语言上提了些建议，至于文章逻辑我也在思考！
加油吧！我们同是g友！

When you're on a golden sea
You don't need no memory
Just a place to call your own
As we drift into the zone---------'island in the sun' from Weezer

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