[i习作temp] issue191教育的功能。。。欢迎大家来拍。。。必回拍 [复制链接]

forevera
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电梯直达

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发表于 2005-4-15 10:27:04 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

191"Education should be equally devoted to enriching the personal lives of students and to training students to be productive workers."
1. What should education actually do? It produces discipline containers or is only a possible tool to gain personal possession? The answer seems to differ greatly from various kinds of mind. Whereas, in general, it is education’s destiny that it should bring an individual strong ability of survival in the complex society and changing world. And, in detail, education should enrich personal lives of students both mentally and physically. In addition, it is also needed to train students to be productive workers.
2. In the first place, as there are numerous subjects that education covers, a large amount of them, including literature, philosophy, and so on, symbolized as much inner works or physical actions enhance daily lives of students by adding some new but exciting element to their ways of life. Francis Bacon, one of the greatest British Philosopher, once mentioned (and I paraphrase): “Histories makes men wise; poems witty; the mathematics subtle; natural philosophy deep; moral grave; logic and rhetoric able to contend.” As he mentioned, education teaches people to live in superior manners. Further cases in point, sports courses, such as basketball, football, and some other alike, can not only have students’ bodies strengthened, but also relax their tired and boring brains. In addition, students also get motivated by team work, or the core spirit of Olympic Games-“higher, faster, and stronger”. With appropriate education, students lead colorful life styles, which, fortunately, are beneficial to them indeed.
3. On the other hand, enhancing students’ lives only seems to leave far away from another central goal of education. Essentially, education has the duty to bring skills and knowledge for students to make their living, and ultimately to be independent. Thus, it is acceptable that majority of colleges and universities courses are highly skill-relevant. Professors give their students not fundamental disciplines, but detailed information about diverse skills. Professors teach, for instance, how to run a machine, how to make right decision to invest, or how to operate a computer, etc. And relying on all of these valuable methods, even some of which are proved to be irrelevant with students’ interest in the future, students, at least, can be independent on economy.
4. Additionally, with further thought, education has been highly tending to produce workers that are profitable to the society. As far as I am concerned, this is right the core of education’s central spirit, and is the most important reason that education has been in existence. Consequently, society requires new and active powers created by education to help get improved. While, to the young students, their imaginative minds and creativity also gain quite a broad stage to have wonderful performances and to show their value. Accordingly, the society and students can both get profit from each other. In other word, education benefits the two sides. To extend, simply put, without education, the society can not be satisfied for a lack of certain kinds of productive workers, such as architects, electricians and doctors.
5. In summary, education satisfies students by enhancing their standard of daily lives. While, more importantly, it leads the society to a mode of counterbalance, by meeting needs of different sides in the society.

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puerility
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沙发

发表于 2005-4-15 15:17:38 |只看该作者

191"Education should be equally devoted to enriching the personal lives of students and to training students to be productive workers."
[首先注意一下发贴的格式，每段空一行，不用在每段开头标上数字]
What should education actually do? It produces discipline containers or is only a possible tool to gain personal possession? The answer seems to differ greatly from various kinds of mind. Whereas, in general, it is education’s destiny that it should bring an individual strong ability of survival in the complex society and changing world. And, in detail, education should enrich personal lives of students both mentally and physically. In addition, it is also needed to train students to be productive workers.[观点提出的有点让人读起来不爽，把意思换种说法]

In the first place, as there are numerous subjects that education covers, a large amount of them, including literature, philosophy, and so on, symbolized as much inner works or physical actions enhance daily lives of students by adding some new but exciting element to their ways of life. Francis Bacon, one of the greatest British Philosopher, once mentioned (and I paraphrase): “Histories makes men wise; poems witty; the mathematics subtle; natural philosophy deep; moral grave; logic and rhetoric able to contend.” [这句引用的很好，但是，这么长要真的不好背啊] As he mentioned, education teaches people to live in superior manners. Further cases in point, sports courses, such as basketball, football, and some other alike, can not only have [make] students’ bodies strengthened, but also relax their tired and boring brains. In addition, students also get motivated by team work, or the core spirit of Olympic Games-“higher, faster, and stronger”. With appropriate education, students lead colorful life styles, which, fortunately, are beneficial to them indeed.

On the other hand, enhancing students’ lives only seems to leave far away from another central goal of education. Essentially, education has the duty to bring skills and knowledge for students to make their living, and ultimately to be independent. Thus, it is acceptable that majority of colleges and universities courses are highly skill-relevant. Professors give their students not fundamental disciplines, but detailed information about diverse skills. Professors teach, for instance, how to run a machine, how to make right decision to invest, or how to operate a computer, etc. And relying on all of these valuable methods, even some of which are proved to be irrelevant with students’ interest in the future, students, at least, can be independent on economy.

Additionally, with further thought, education has been highly tending to produce workers that are profitable to the society. As far as I am concerned, this is right the core of education’s central spirit, and is the most important reason that education has been in existence. Consequently, society requires new and active powers created by education to help get improved. While, to the young students, their imaginative minds and creativity also gain quite a broad stage to have wonderful performances and to show their value. Accordingly, the society and students can both get profit from each other. In other word, [words] education benefits the two sides. To extend, simply put, without education, the society can not be satisfied for a lack of certain kinds of productive workers, such as architects, electricians and doctors.

In summary, education satisfies students by enhancing their standard of daily lives. While, more importantly, it leads the society to a mode of counterbalance, by meeting needs of different sides in the society.
[文章写的真好，分析的很透彻，bow一个，词汇更是丰富多样，我看了半天真没改出来什么，作者水平很高的]

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forevera
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板凳

发表于 2005-4-18 06:22:20 |只看该作者

谢谢了，呵呵。。。

你说观点提出的有点让人读起来不爽指的是提出的方式不爽，还是内容上不爽。。。。

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symphony22
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地板

发表于 2005-4-18 10:16:13 |只看该作者

191"Education should be equally devoted to enriching the personal lives of students and to training students to be productive workers.

"
1. What should education actually do? 这种表达太中文化了It produces discipline containers or is only a possible tool to gain personal possession? or 连接的两部分一个是称述句一个是一般疑问句，作者到底想怎么表达？The answer seems to differ greatly from various kinds of mind. Whereas, in general, it is education’s destinythe destiny of education that it should bring an individual strong ability of survival in the complex society and changing worldThe destiny of education is tell individuals how to survival in such a complex and chanllenging world. And, in detail, education should enrich personal lives of students 这里就最好用students' personal lives因为他是有灵主语，就是有生命的多用所有格both mentally and physically. In addition, it is also needed to train students to be productive workers.

这段说教育的目的，感觉有些散，不是特别紧凑哈！

2. In the first place,第二段了，突然来个in the first place 感觉怪怪的 as there are numerous subjects that education covers, a large amount of themwhich, including literature, philosophy, and so on, symbolized as much inner works or physical actions enhance daily lives of students by adding some new but exciting element to their ways of life.中文的表达~ Francis Bacon, one of the greatest British Philosopher, once mentioned (and I paraphrase): “Histories makes men wise; poems witty; the mathematics subtle; natural philosophy deep; moral grave; logic and rhetoric able to contend.”背的很熟嘛~ZAN 一个！：P As he mentioned, education teaches people to live in superior manners. Further cases in point, sports courses, such as basketball, football, and some other alike,用的不错~ can not only havemake students’ bodies strengthened, but also relax their tired and boring brains.boring brains?老外怕是看不懂哦！ In addition, students also get motivated by team work, or the core spirit of Olympic Games-“higher, faster, and stronger”. With appropriate education, students lead colorful life styles, which, fortunately, are beneficial to them indeed.

3. On the other hand,既然你这里这样用，那前面为何不用on one hand? enhancing students’ lives only seems to leave far away from another central goal of education. Essentially, education has the duty to bring skills and knowledge for students to make their living, and ultimately to be independent. Thus, it is acceptable that majority of colleges and universities courses are highly skill-relevant. Professors give their students not fundamental disciplines, butalsoailed information about diverse skills. Professors teachthemr instance, how to run a machine, how to make rightwise decision to invest, or how to operate a computer, etc. 例子很细很具体呢！不错不错！~And relying on all of these valuable methods, even some of which are proved to be irrelevant with students’ interest in the future, students, at least, can be independent on economy.

4. Additionally, with further thought, education has been highly tending to produce workers that are profitableworker profitable 啊？ to the society. As far as I am concerned, this is right the core of education’s central spirit, and is the most important reason that education has been in existence.and it is what there for Consequently, society requires new and active powers created by education to help get improved. While, to the young students, their imaginative minds and creativity also gain quite a broad stage to have wonderful performances and to show their value. Accordingly, the society and students can both get profit from each other. In other word, education benefits the two sides. To extend, simply put, without education, the society can not be satisfied forwith a lack of certain kinds of productive workers, such as architects, electricians and doctors.

5. In summary, education satisfies students by enhancing their standard of daily lives. While, more importantly, it leads the society to a mode of counterbalance, by meeting needs of different sides in the society

首先请楼主务必注意发贴格式！！另外很多语言有中文痕迹，注意一下哈~！加油！！；P

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