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[未归类] 我的918备战作文本~一战作文25现在觉得越写越差~求大家点评! [复制链接]

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发表于 2010-9-15 14:11:23 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Playing sports teaches people more lessons about the life.

I still remember a classical scene in the film “Forest Gump”, little Gump experienced his new life by running and running. That makes me think of the association between life and sports and as a result, I propose that playing sports teaches people more lessons about the life since there are many similarities we can find and then learn much more.
Firstly, the sports strongly enlightens us that failure is inevitable in our life. I constantly recall my first riding which is really a tough memory. I could not control the bicycle and slipped again and again and also made myself black and blue. Stunning like a duck, I kept trying and practicing, with ache all over my legs and countless falling into the ground, I learned the skill by dreaming a nightmare. But after years, I understand that is such a valuable lesson in that I impressed by the effort end endeavor I have to take for kind of success and that made subtle influence on my rest time of living.
Secondly, we can recognize the importance of cooperation through the team work. For instant, the reason why basketball is regarded as the most favorite sports event is that it clearly demonstrates the wander of highly-skilled teamwork. That kind of sportsmanship evokes our passion and excitement and stimuli us to do better when working with others because we have felt its power. And in that way, we will benefit a lot.
In addition, we also admit that there do exist genius in the sports field ,and, surely in our life.They always run faster than I, more skilled and win victory over me. I admire and revere them ,meanwhile, I never neglect the sweat and exhaustion from their daily exercises from that I perceive that the talented are not able to achieve the goal. In other words,we have opportunity to realize the dream despite that we are and will never be genius.
In conclusion, playing sports do gives us thought-provoking lessons rather than strength our body.
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沙发
发表于 2010-9-15 14:12:10 |只看该作者
Government should support art museum and music performance more than recreational facilities, such as swimming pool or playground.
As our country gradually solve the problem of starving and living, citizens are striving for a higher standard of living level.Such as the recreation, the health and happiness, the mental pursuit,and forth and so on. Thus , time witnesses that the lands change into buildings of diverse function. However, when it comes to the issue that compared to the recreational facilities,the museum and music should be given the priority, I strongly disagree with that and I will illustrate my points as follows.
First of all, there is no denying that people who own the appreciation of certain level is the minority of the population. In this way ,the are museum and music performance could only serve for people of a small number and it would kind of waste to some extent. In contrast to that mentioned ,recreational facilities as swimming pool or playground are always in great need. Because recreational facilities are accessible to everyone and the enormous volume of people in our country are definitely not in proportion, however the young and the old, the professional and the just-for-fun ,they all require basic infrastructure to exercise, to walk ,to relax. As a result, government should support more facilities.
Secondly , the budget to the art museum overweighs that to the facilities dramatically. It is obvious that art and music work are worthwhile and precious so that to the fees for collecting and showing is a serious task for the government. In addition, the fare to maintain and protect the valued work leads to another financial problem. Nevertheless, with that budget will several infrastructure lands be finished and benefit the citizens in a long run.
Admittedly , if a country or a city has already achieve the well-off life and the fully security, I will undoubtedly proponent the measures to construct the art museum or hold the music performances from my heart, since Marks said, the economy base determined the upper building. Government should take the situation of its own into consideration and never forgets to have a second thought. And in that way ,life will be of enjoyment.

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板凳
发表于 2010-9-15 14:12:43 |只看该作者
不同意年轻人应该早点定工作,而不是多试试各种不同工作
For the time being, due to the influence of the financial crisis and the rapidly increasing number of college graduates , it is seemingly that finding a favored and decent job is quite difficult. Thus,many children of my relatives are urged to be a practitioner as soon as possible and stability is regarded as the premier element. Nevertheless, from my point of view, I cannot agree on that at all. I will illustrate with two convincing points as follows.
Firstly, a noted Chinese writer said, the young should go to the remote place. Which means that the youth should experience more things and widen their horizon during the most colorful of their full life. So trying various kinds of work is undoubtedly the better way. A case in point may exemplify it. Franklin, a well-known politician in America, also changed lots of work before he successed. Such as a publishing worker , an editor. Through the hard-working time and the change of job style ,he learned precious experiences and gradually found the way of his own, which resulted in his final achievement. It suffices to say that a changeable and unstable life enrich our mind and deepen our sight.
Another point we should not ignore to discuss the issue is that the freshmen of society may regret doing the fixed job. Statistics have showed that more than 60% people will try to find the second job for sake of their career development. Many aspects leads to the consequence. For example, some may find that there is large gap between the imagination and the reality which is hard to accepted. Some also note that he or she is not capable or suitable for the certain kind of work, that’s bitter to taste .Regarding to the fact, we can safely draw the conclusion that the young need to know themselves in the course of landing on different jobs .
In one word, experiencing several jobs is valuable and beneficial for the youth who is eager for a fruitful life. And in addition it will definitely give rise to their career.

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地板
发表于 2010-9-15 14:33:21 |只看该作者
自己顶~~~

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5
发表于 2010-9-15 15:43:25 |只看该作者
只写了第一篇 ..
语言感觉特别地道 特别连贯
就是最后一个POINT优点模糊 中心是不是realize the dream?? 稍微弱了点这个POINT

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发表于 2010-9-15 15:48:27 |只看该作者
5# 巴西仔 太同意了,其实写到第三个点有点写不下去,改改

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发表于 2010-9-15 20:01:43 |只看该作者
自己顶~

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发表于 2010-9-15 20:53:30 |只看该作者
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Playing sports teaches people more lessons about the life.
I still remember a classical scene in the film “Forest Gump”, little Gump experienced his new life by running and running. That makes me think of the association between life and sports and as a result, I propose that playing sports teaches people more lessons about life since the similarities between them enable us to learn about real life just by playing sports(这句话改得面目全废了,见谅)
Firstly, the sports strongly enlightens us that failure is inevitable in our life. I constantly recall my first riding, a tough memory to be frank(改成了同位语). I could not control the bicycle and slipped again and again and made myself black and blue. Stunning like a duck, I kept trying and practicing, with ache all over my legs and countless falling into the ground, I learned the skill by dreaming a nightmare. But after years, I understand that is such a valuable lesson in that I impressed by the effort end endeavor I have to take for kind of success and that made subtle influence on my rest time of living.(这句话有语病吧)
Secondly, we can recognize the importance of cooperation through the team work. For instant, the reason why basketball is regarded as the most favorite sports event is that it clearly demonstrates the wander of highly-skilled teamwork(wonder,还有basketball本身应该是一个sport,而nba或者fiba才是event吧). That kind of sportsmanship evokes our passion and excitement and stimuli us to do better when working with others because we have felt its power. And in that way, we will benefit a lot.
In addition, we also admit that there do exist genius in the sports field ,and, surely in our life.They always run faster than I, more skilled and win victory over me. I admire and revere them ,meanwhile, I never neglect the sweat and exhaustion from their daily exercises apart from that I perceive that the talented are not able to achieve the goal. (这里是不是apart from?)In other words,we have opportunity to realize the dream despite that we are and will never be genius.
In conclusion, playing sports do gives us thought-provoking lessons rather than strength our body.

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发表于 2010-9-15 21:18:00 |只看该作者
8# kkant 好细致。。谢谢你~!去改改~

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发表于 2010-9-16 00:06:49 |只看该作者
在这写,不会被e-rater查到吗?
不会被判雷同吧??

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发表于 2010-9-16 10:13:25 |只看该作者
10# fcugqx 应该不会吧,独立写作小组也很长时间了~

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RE: 我的918备战作文本~一战作文25现在觉得越写越差~求大家点评! [修改]
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