[a习作temp] Argument76 大家使劲拍吧 [复制链接]

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电梯直达

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发表于 2005-7-24 21:10:45 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

76. The following appeared as part of an article in a health and beauty magazine.

"A group of volunteers participated in a study of consumer responses to the new Luxess face cream. Every morning for a month, they washed their faces with mild soap and then applied Luxess. At the end of that month, most volunteers reported a marked improvement in the way their skin looked and felt. Thus it appears that Luxess is truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin."
观点：
1.指出Survey没有代表性
2.也可能是其他因素造成皮肤很好，而不是Luxess
3.时间太短，不足以说明Luxess有没有其他副作用

In this argument, the arguer asserts that Luxess is truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin. To support his conclusion, the arguer provides the evidence that a group of volunteers participated in a study of Luxess face cream and most of them reported a marked improvement in the way their skin looked and felt after using Luxess every morning for one month. However, this argument suffers from several critical fallacies after careful examinations.

First, the arguer doesn’t mention about what kind of volunteers who take part in the test. It’s known to all that most young people often already have well faces in good condition, so if these people had participated in such study, improvement were more easy to realize. Moreover, it is questionable whether Luxess is useful for other kind of people, such as kids, or old people. Meanwhile, the arguer fails to provide the evidence that there are enough samples in this experiment. Maybe only small amount of people interest in it, and then the result is not representative and make no sense. Another point worth considering is that the arguer claims that most volunteers reported a marked improvement after using Luxess. But the real ratio of the reporter is unknown, and how much of the improvement is also unclear. Perhaps it’s only slight more than half percentage; therefore, the result is also meaningless.

On the other hand, the arguer fails to establish a casual relationship between Luxess and the improvement. Although the volunteers washed their faces with mild soap and applied Luxess every day, it doesn’t mean the Luxess greatly contribute to the improvement. The arguer ignores several other factors that might result in good faces. It is possible that the volunteers were staying in a comfortable room with mild temperature and humidity, and their faces would be better naturally in that environment. Thus, it couldn’t conclude that the Luxess results in such improved faces. Moreover, the arguer also fails to take into account other possible reasons such as the mild soup. It’s likely that the mild soap mainly affects people’s face, and the Luxess didn’t work at all.

Finally, the result of the study upon which the argument relies is too short to be credible. Generally, most kinds of cosmetic will perform after a longer time, sometimes accompanying with other side-effect. Possibly these volunteers who reported a marked improvement feel uneasy and look uglier than before after the next moth, and have to resort to hospital necessarily. Therefore, hastily giving such conclusion for only one-month test is unconvincing and irresponsible.

To conclude, this argument is not persuasive as it stands. To solidify the argument, the arguer should provide more evidence that the Luxess performs on one’s face, and clearly indicate the generalization of the study along with exact numbers. In addition, the arguer also should do more investigation and survey with a longer time for high reliability.

使劲拍，谢谢

[ Last edited by staralways on 2005-7-24 at 23:01 ]

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沙发

发表于 2005-7-24 21:28:43 |只看该作者

Arg76 大家使劲拍吧

76. The following appeared as part of an article in a health and beauty magazine.

"A group of volunteers participated in a study of consumer responses to the new Luxess face cream. Every morning for a month, they washed their faces with mild soap and then applied Luxess. At the end of that month, most volunteers reported a marked improvement in the way their skin looked and felt. Thus it appears that Luxess is truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin."
观点：
1.指出Survey没有代表性
2.也可能是其他因素造成皮肤很好，而不是Luxess
3.时间太短，不足以说明Luxess有没有其他副作用

In this argument, the arguer asserts that Luxess is truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin. To support his conclusion, the arguer provides the evidence that a group of volunteers participated in a study of Luxess face cream and most of them reported a marked improvement in the way their skin looked and felt after using Luxess every morning for one month.(抄原句?) However, this argument suffers from several critical fallacies after careful examinations.

<Make sure the reader knows EXACTLY what point you are trying to make. I always make my conclusion, or thesis statement, the last sentence in the introduction.>来自: https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... type%26typeid%3D146
所以开头要简练, 让老外一看就知!
比如tangjihede的开头很好!( https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... ight=%2Btangjihede)
The arguer attempts to prove that Luxess face cream is a truly effective face cream by appealing to（好词） the result of a volunteers’ test. A close examination, however, will show that this conclusion is not convincing.（开头简洁有力，赞！顺便说一下，本人极其欣赏逻辑明确，并且一句废话都没有的文章，：p

First, the arguer doesn’t mention about what kind of volunteers who take part in the test. It’s known to all that most young people often already have well faces in good condition, so if these people had participated in such study, improvement were more easy to realize. Moreover, it is questionable whether Luxess is useful for other kind of people, such as kids, or old people. Meanwhile, the arguer fails to provide the evidence that there are enough samples in this experiment. Maybe only small amount of people interest in it, and then the result is not representative and make no sense. Another point worth considering is that the arguer claims that most volunteers reported a marked improvement after using Luxess. But the real ratio of the reporter is unknown, and how much of the improvement is also unclear. Perhaps it’s only slight more than half percentage; therefore, the result is also meaningless.

On the other hand, the arguer fails to establish a casual relationship between Luxess and the improvement. Although the volunteers washed their faces with mild soap and applied Luxess every day, it doesn’t mean the Luxess greatly contribute to the improvement. The arguer ignores several other factors that might result in good faces. It is possible that the volunteers were staying in a comfortable room with mild temperature and humidity, and their faces would be better naturally in that environment. Thus, it couldn’t conclude that the Luxess results in such improved faces. Moreover, the arguer also fails to take into account other possible reasons such as the mild soup. It’s likely that the mild soap mainly affects people’s face, and the Luxess didn’t work at all.

Finally, the result of the study upon which the argument relies is too short to be credible. Generally, most kinds of cosmetic will perform after a longer time, sometimes accompanying with other side-effect. Possibly these volunteers who reported a marked improvement feel uneasy and look uglier than before after the next moth, and have to resort to hospital necessarily. Therefore, hastily giving such conclusion for only one-month test is unconvincing and irresponsible.

To conclude, this argument is not persuasive as it stands. To solidify the argument, the arguer should provide more evidence that the Luxess performs on one’s face, and clearly indicate the generalization of the study along with exact numbers. In addition, the arguer also should do more investigation and survey with a longer time for high reliability.
该点到的都说了,基本上都是上面讨论的范围内!

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