[a习作temp] arugement9 第一篇，诚心请教，大家给点指导吧：） [复制链接]

shawjet
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发表于 2005-8-5 00:36:58 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

第一篇argument，错误虽然不难找，但写下来觉得自己语言很贫乏，展开的也不够深入，写得很简单，好多想法都不知道怎么表达：（
大家给我指点一下吧，好让我知道应该怎么做，谢谢啦:)

题目：
The following appeared in a memorandum from a dean at Omega University.
"Fifteen years ago, Omega University implemented a new procedure that encouraged students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness of all their professors. Since that time, Omega professors have begun to assign higher grades in their classes, and overall student grade averages at Omega have risen by thirty percent. Potential employers apparently believe the grades at Omega are inflated; this would explain why Omega graduates have not been as successful at getting jobs as have graduates from nearby Alpha University. To enable its graduates to secure better jobs, Omega University should now terminate student evaluation of professors."
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正文：
In this argument, the arguer concludes that terminate student evaluation of professor's will enable the graduates of Omega University to secure better jobs. To support the conclusion, the arguer points out that since Omega University encouraged the students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness of all their professors, the professors give their students higher grades which potential employers think are inflated. In addition, the arguer cites that Omega graduates have not been as successful at getting jobs as have graduates from Alpha University. This argument suffers from several critical fallacies.

First, the conclusion that student grade in Omega University rise because of the evaluation is unfounded. There is no evidence that the ability of students is not improved. As mentioned in the argument, the evaluation has implemented for fifteen years, fifteen years is such a long time that the students now may be more intelligent than before. In addition, the purpose of the evaluation is to improve the teaching level through asking the students for the feedback on the teaching, and the terminal aim is to improve the students' ability, but grade is an important standard to weigh the effect of the improvement. Since the evaluation has taken fifteen years, why not student grade rise because of good effect of the evaluation project? Therefore, though the student grade risen by thirty percent, it is arbitrary to make the conclusion that student grade is inflated.

Second, the arguer makes a false analogy. The fact that graduates from Alpha University have been more successful at getting jobs than graduates from Omega University doesn't lend support to the claim that Omega University should terminate the evaluation. In the argument, it is not mentioned that evaluation is not implemented in Alpha University. It is possible that Alpha University also implement evaluation to improve the teaching effectivemess after Omega University. This may because the student grade in Omega University is higher than before and Alpha University follows it to raise its own student grade. Beside, as we know, there are many other request to consider when looking for a job. For example, the speciality of the students is an important thing. The specialities in Alpha University may be more popular than those in Omega University, and the students in Alpha University may be more creative or excellent at other aspect, so graduates from Alpha University are more likely to find good jobs.

In conclusion, the arguer fails to establish a causal relationship between implementing evaluation and secure better jobs. To strength the argument, the arguer would have to provide the evidence that student grade in Omega University rise because of inflating. To better evaluate the argument, we should need more information about the Alpha University such as the specialities in it.