[a习作temp] 0910GNorth America Flying] Argument173 by rainyashley [复制链接]

rainyashley
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发表于 2009-6-6 03:23:11 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

本帖最后由 rainyashley 于 2009-6-6 03:30 编辑

ARGUMENT173 - The following is a memorandum issued by the publisher of a newsmagazine, Newsbeat, in the country of Dinn.

"Our poorest-selling magazine issues over the past three years were those that featured international news stories on their front covers. Over the same period, competing news-magazines have significantly decreased the number of cover stories that they devote to international news. Moreover, the cost of maintaining our foreign bureaus to report on international news is increasing. Therefore, we should decrease our emphasis on international news and refrain from displaying such stories on our magazine covers."

According to the argument, the author concludes that the magazine should decrease their emphasis on the international news and refrain displaying such stories on the magazine covers. To justify this conclusion, the author points out the decline in sales of the magazine is that the magazine featured international news stories on the front covers while at the same period, the competitors have a great reduction in the number of cover stories which is mainly about the international news. What's more, the author persuade us to adopt the advice by the evidence that the cost of maintaining our foreign bureaus to report on international news is increasing. It seems to be convinced at first glance, but I still find that it is suspicious in several grounds.

First, the author relies on a statistic which is three years ago to justify that the magazine should change his editorial strategy today. In today's world ,the international situation is complicated and have changed every time. It is entirely possible that people in today's world will be more interested in international news because they want to what a world they lived in so that if the magazine decrease the international news stories on the front covers, it will lost a lot of readers. In addition, the author fails to rule out other relevant factors, such as the contents of other part in the magazine, the price, the sales strategy, the advertisement, the popularity of the magazine, the local people whether they are interested in reading, may attribute to the decline in sales of the magazine. So I cannot be convinced by the feeble evidence.

Secondly, the author provides no evidence that the situation on which the argument depends is statistically reliable. The author fails indicate that the competing news-magazine experience a increase or a decrease after they cut down the number of the international news stories on the front covers. May be the competitors have a decline. Moreover, even if the competitor gain a significant increase, there is evidence to prove that it is the success of international news's decline. It may result from the reasons that the competitor make a abundant contents in other parts in the magazine,or publish other kinds of news like amusement, scandals, gossip news,military introductions and so on. So, I cannot be persuaded by the comparison without logical.

Third, the author cannot assert without providing other solutions that decrease the emphasis on the international news and refrain from displaying such stories on the magazine covers is the best way to handle the decline in sales of the magazine. The sales increasing can be achieved by such methods as strengthening the propaganda of the magazine, improving the efficiency of management, promoting the quality of the magazine, or making a questionnaire which is distribute to the local people in order to know what kind of the contents they like to read, etc.

In sum, I can't be convince by the evidence the author offered. The author assumes that the sales will be increased by the simply decline in the number of front covers which devote on the international news. The evidence the author supplies here is unreliable. In order to demonstrate the argument fairly, I should know the true reasons for the sales decline.

这篇文章写得很烂很烂，写得很想关电脑。。。
大家多改改吧！！！！

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whyyolanda
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沙发

发表于 2009-6-6 11:24:00 |只看该作者

本帖最后由 whyyolanda 于 2009-6-6 11:42 编辑

According to the argument, the author concludes that the magazine should decrease their emphasis on the international news and refrain displaying such stories on the magazine covers. To justify this conclusion, the author points out the decline in sales of the magazine is that the magazine featured international news stories on the front covers while at the same period, the competitors have a great reduction in the number of cover stories which is mainly about the international news. What's more, the author persuade us to adopt the advice by the evidence that the cost of maintaining our（their吧……是不是复制、粘贴后忘改了？） foreign bureaus to report on international news is increasing. It seems to be convinced at first glance, but I still find that it is suspicious in several grounds.

First, the author relies on a statistic which is three years ago to justify that the magazine should change his editorial strategy today. In today's world ,the international situation is complicated and have changed every time. It is entirely possible that people in today's world will be more interested in international news because they want to（动词呢？） what a world they lived in so that if the magazine decrease the international news stories on the front covers, it will（太绝对了吧，换成虚拟语气会不会更好^^） lost a lot of readers. In addition, the author fails to rule out other relevant factors, such as the contents of other part in the magazine, the price, the sales strategy, the advertisement, the popularity of the magazine, the local people whether they are interested in reading, may attribute to the decline in sales of the magazine. So I cannot be convinced by the feeble evidence.

Secondly, the author provides no evidence that the situation on which the argument depends is statistically reliable. The author fails indicate that the competing news-magazine experience a increase or a decrease after they cut down the number of the international news stories on the front covers. May be the competitors have a decline. Moreover, even if the competitor gain a significant increase, there is evidence to prove that it is the success of international news's decline.(说反了不是？) It may result from the reasons that the competitor make a abundant contents in other parts in the magazine,or publish other kinds of news like amusement, scandals, gossip news,military introductions and so on. So, I cannot be persuaded by the comparison without logical（应该用名词形式吧）.

Third, the author cannot assert without providing other solutions that decrease the emphasis on the international news and refrain from displaying such stories on the magazine covers is the best way to handle the decline in sales of the magazine. The sales increasing can be achieved by such methods as strengthening the propaganda of the magazine, improving the efficiency of management, promoting the quality of the magazine, or making a questionnaire which is distribute to the local people in order to know what kind of the contents they like to read, etc.

在总结之前再分析下国外局的经费上涨问题会更有力吧

In sum, I can't be convince by the evidence the author offered. The author assumes that the sales will be increased by the simply decline in the number of front covers which devote on the international news. The evidence the author supplies here is unreliable. In order to demonstrate the argument fairly, I should know the true reasons for the sales decline.
总体来说不错的啦，哪有你说的那么差啊:)
不过，可以看出这位同学比较粗心……太困了吧当时？

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