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TPO 6作文练笔,求批改! [复制链接]

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发表于 2011-7-18 00:46:42 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
Integrated:
In the listening passage, the lecturer refutes the critics on the short-comings of the on-line encyclopedias, and she stands against the points made in the reading passage.

First, it needs to be noted that, according to the lecturer, no completely accurate information exists in encyclopedias in whatever kind of forms. People cannot fully rely on the traditional, printed encyclopedias developed by a closed set of experts and the on-line encyclopedias enable the readers to correct the potentially incorrect information, which would be considered a huge advantage over the traditional encyclopedias.

Second, regarding the hacking, the lecturer points out that some techniques could be applied to assure the security of information for the on-line encyclopedias. Examples may be to leave some articles to be unchanged by the readers and to invite some editors to look after the alternation. Therefore, it would not need to worry about the problem of corruptive information.

Third, as for the information selection, it should not be thought as a disadvantage, as the reading passage believes, but rather be the greatest advantage of on-line encyclopedias over the traditional ones. On-line encyclopedias has unlimited storage so that people would put things interest them into the encyclopedias, on contrary to the traditional encyclopedias in which only things interesting those experts would be included. Therefore, the on-line encyclopedia is more reflective than the traditional ones.

Independent:
People live in different parts of the world and have different development history, but in general, all of us human beings are living in a more easier and enjoyable lives than our grandparents were. It could be proved in three separate ways.

First, by the courtesy of technology advance, our generation has owned something unimaginable in the past. The innovation has greatly promoted our living standards and helped us get rid of heavy tasks such as washing dishes and clearing the bushes. Nowhere else would illustrate such a fact better than in the United States. During the 1930s', American people had to walk far away to the river bank to wash their clothes and today, they could easily have their washing machines do the same job. So vast amount of spare time has been created that each of us is able to watch a film at home after finishing our works. Can't it be a case to show the improvement of our lives?

Second, the world economy has taken off in the past few decades, so does the structure of out society. The social development has brought about unlimited opportunity to the people once believed to live in poverty forever. It was commonly taken for granted that the son of the cowboy should eternally be cowboys. But thanks to the human right movement, nowadays the children from low class families can afford their education in universities. It tremendously encouraged those talented youngsters to be self-confident in their futures, which is definitely an evidence of the improvement of our living.

Third, as we have entered an explosive era of international trade, we are now entitled the right to emigrate to other countries in pursuit of even bigger fortune. We can never forget the harsh days when our ancestors risked their lives to emigrate to some other nations and were discriminated and mistreated as easy labors. Now people could do this in a more dignified way and many countries begin to absorb intelligent immigrants. It would undoubtedly improve the living standards of all the new immigrants.

In conclusion, this generation has been offer an unrivaled living environment compared to its grandparents and all of us should think about what we could contribute to make the living standards of our offsprings more comfortable.
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