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[优秀习作] issue152 高频限时 [复制链接]

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发表于 2004-4-9 17:59:58 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
Issue152  第7篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧!
------摘要------
作者:寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间:45分2秒     563 words
从2004年3月9日16时53分到2004年3月9日17时45分
------题目------
The only responsibility of corporate executives, provided they stay within the law, is to make as much money as possible for their companies.
------正文------
Undoubtedly, one most essential purpose of corporation is to make money. Thus, it is the obligation of corporation executives to make as much money as possible for their companies, of course, provided they stay within the law. While, some people hold the opinion that the responsibility for the society is also necessary for the corporations own something to the society and should try to avoid potential harmless during their process of making money. However, I doubt the practical value of this statement and insist that limit of the harmful behaviors should be prescribed in law.

On one hand, common wisdom tells us that the interests of the corporations, which is most related to how many profits they make, build upon and are not mutually exclusive with the interests of society. More money a corporation gets, more can it add the revenue of a nation. More prosperous a corporation becomes perhaps more job opportunities can it provides the unemployed. What is more, a profitable corporation, on balance, tends to donate some of their money to the society in order to solve some social problems, such as AIDS problem, education deficits, environment problems and the like. In short, as the society's prosperity partly benefit from the corporation's thrive, in a sense, no corporate executive can shirk the responsibility of make more dollars to the corporation.

On the other hand, it is hard for corporate executives to realize the behaviors that may harm the society. Although people may argue that the corporations also to some extent depend on the society, and law does not in all cases prevent the executives from harming the society deliberately or not, there lies a question that, when the legislators can not discover that kind of politics or actions, how can a corporate executive know? Admittedly, law is unable to protect all interests of society and prevent all the harmful behaviors immediately, but it does not follow that other people, including the executives, can realize them soon. A factory that drained their waste water, which was fraught with toxic elements, might found out the latent disaster. However, when factories crazily sold the refrigerator with the element that polluted the ozone, no one, executives, consumers or the scientists paid attention to this problem until decades later. The possibility exist that executives are likely to remiss the potential harm of their behaviors on their way of making dollars, to some extent it is beyond their ability and obligation to always avoid hurting some of the society's interest.

Then the burden of prescribing the harmful behaviors goes to the legislators. Although as analyzed above, they also cannot legal those behaviors in the interest of the majority and the society, they are the crucial people in determining whether those behaviors can be hampered as soon as possible. Suggestion of scientists and masses of people plays an important role as trace for them to note the underlying problems. Also, they should be acute towards all the changes in different fields of the society. So tough their work is, however, by this mean, those executives are more likely to do more good rather than harm to the society.

In sum, the responsibility of the executives is to make more profits to the corporations as well as to the society, meanwhile, the prompt changes in the law are the crucial factor to prevent them from harming the society.

harm 用的太多,又不知道改成什么好:(
all my dream
is changing everywhere
in every possible, possible, possible way
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沙发
发表于 2004-4-9 18:51:18 |只看该作者
Issue152  第1篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧!
------摘要------
作者:寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间:45分7秒     436 words
从2004年3月9日18时15分到2004年3月9日19时45分
------题目------
The only responsibility of corporate executives, provided they stay within the law, is to make as much money as possible for their companies.
------正文------
What are the corporate executives' responsibility? As to this issue, many people maintain that the corporate executives should make as much money as possible for their companies which is writed in some econimical books, while others advocate that they should take the social responbilities at first. Both of he two views are too extreme to employ, however, in my opinion, the executives of a companies should fist make enough money to keep survive, and then for a long run development, he should take the social responbilities and keep a good relationship with the government of the country.

Fist, just as that was said in the text books: make profits is the only way for a companies, corporate executives should fist to make as much money as possible for their companies. To a company, whether it can make profits or not decide that whether the company can survive because he should use money to give the employee wages, to hand up the tex for the government, to maintain the machine and factory, to buy the material of product. So money is very important to a company, a company need money which is just like a man first  need to fulfil in the food, without money can not go long, even to take others responsibilities. So make money should be the main responsibility of corporate.

Secondly, as the society become more and more complex, the relationship of between company and society becomes more and more close than ever before which requires that corporate executives should also take the social responbility beside mak persuit profit for the country. When a company make money, it will affect the society. For example, air pollution, decreasing of origional forest, deleption of ozone, all of them are caused by the modern companies while they are make profits. As a social member, company should take the responbility.   

Moreover, taking a social responsibility will greatl benefits for company' development especial for the long run profits. If the executives aim to make money without concerning the social abilitity, on the one hand, few people will support him, since he will usually harm society or prople; on he other hands, the more and more weaker society environment will defintely break the long run of the society. For example, if a executives only aim to make money of trees ignoreing the obiligation of planing new trees, one day in the near future, he will lost the resoursed of making money.

In conclusion, staying within the law, executives should take the society responbility while making enough money to keep the company runing so as to make a continuous development.

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板凳
发表于 2004-4-9 18:52:00 |只看该作者
快考试了,我都不知道怎么说才好了

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地板
发表于 2004-4-9 18:54:29 |只看该作者
有一点挺高兴的,竟然只有一个拼写错误

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发表于 2004-4-9 18:55:25 |只看该作者
老家帮我好好改一下写写

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发表于 2004-4-9 18:56:32 |只看该作者
如果你还在的话就过来聊一会
QQ:88136484

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发表于 2004-4-9 19:01:40 |只看该作者
11830159
吃饭回来,马上加你
all my dream
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in every possible, possible, possible way

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发表于 2004-4-9 19:35:43 |只看该作者
Undoubtedly, one most essential purpose of corporation is to make money. Thus, it is the obligation of corporation executives(用corporate executives吧,题目中是这样用的) to make as much money as possible for their companies, of course, provided they stay within the law. While, some people hold the opinion that the responsibility for the society is also necessary for the corporations own something to the society and should try to avoid potential harmless during their process of making money. (这句话看不太懂了,own 和should try 是不是并列的?)However, I doubt the practical value of this statement and insist that limit of the harmful behaviors should be prescribed in law.

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发表于 2004-4-9 19:37:09 |只看该作者
我觉得,你的重点是放在了用法律手段防止公司在谋求利益的同时对社会造成危害?

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发表于 2004-4-9 19:52:46 |只看该作者
------题目------
The only responsibility of corporate executives, provided they stay within the law, is to make as much money as possible for their companies.
------正文------
What are the corporate executives' responsibility? As to this issue, many people maintain that the corporate executives should make as much money as possible for their companies(,) which is writed in some economical books(这后半句没什么意思,要用也用非限定性从句好点), while others advocate that they should take the social responbilities(responsibilities) at first. Both of he(the) two views are too extreme to employ, however, in my opinion, the executives of a companies should fist(first) make enough money to keep survive(surviving), and then for a long run development, he(they) should take the social responbilities(拼写) and keep a good relationship with the government of the country.
这段观点是很明确的,认为赚钱比对社会负责重要,最后一句有点模糊,什么叫和政府保持良好关系?

Fist, just as that was said in the text books: make profits is(making profits is) the only way for a companies(单复!)(to survive or thrive), (thus) corporate executives should fist(拼写) to make as much money as possible for their companies. To a company, whether it can make profits or not decide(decides建议:is a crucial factor in determing) that(删that吧) whether the company can survive because he(it) should use money to(有中式英语的嫌疑,去掉上三个单词吧) give the employee wages(pay the employees,尽量用好点的动词,这一点我也不行就是了,一限时就更是了哈:)), to hand up the tex(tax) for the government, to maintain the machine and (the) factory, (and) to buy(purchase) the material of product(s). So money is very important to(for) a company, a company need money which is just like a man first need to fulfil(fulfill) in the food, without money can not go long, even to take others responsibilities.(这句话不能做一句吧?语法有问题,试分开。Fulfill in food的说法不太妥) So make money should be the main responsibility of corporate.
这段讲的是没有利益就没有生存,不过题目的重点是强调要不顾一切的在法律中赚钱,并没有说不赚钱,这点来说,这段的阐述似乎避开了题目的重点

Secondly, as the society become more and more complex, the relationship of(去掉of) between company and society becomes more and more close(close的比较级注意了!) than ever before(,) which requires that corporate executives should also take the social responbility(拼写) beside make(making动名词做主语!)persuit(?) profit(s) for the country. When a company make(makes) money, it will affect the society.(赚钱的时候就会影响社会?太模糊,以什么方式赚钱怎么样影响社会了,说清楚,与例子的作用保持一致) For example, air pollution, decreasing of origional (拼写)forest(rain forest原始森林不清楚是不是primitive forest,反正不是original forest), deleption(拼写) of ozone, all of them are caused by the modern companies while they are make profits. As a social member, company should take the responbility(拼写).
写的是危害,阐述的较浅

Moreover, taking a social responsibility will greatly benefits for company' development especial for the long run profits. If the executives aim to make money without concerning the social abilitity(?), on the one hand, few people will support him(!them,就算是一个人也要说him or her), since he(!) will usually harm society or prople; on he other hands, the more and more weaker society environment will defintely break the long run of the society. For example, if a executives only aim to make money of trees ignoreing the obiligation of planing new trees, one day in the near future, he will lost the resoursed of making money. (一串拼写错,小心啊!)
这段相当于一个with-without结构的without

In conclusion, staying within the law, executives should (also)take the society reasonability while making enough money to keep the company running so as to make a continuous development.

提几个致命错吧:单复,拼写,一逗到底(句子太长,而又不能算是一个句子),动词不能做主语!切记了
说狠了点,但愿你考试时记得清楚些:)
all my dream
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in every possible, possible, possible way

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发表于 2004-4-9 19:57:56 |只看该作者
While, some people hold the opinion that the responsibility for the society is also necessary for the corporations(,for they写掉了) own something to the society and should try to avoid potential harmless during their process of making money. (这句话看不太懂了,own 和should try 是不是并列的?)
我的提纲是:
赚尽可能多的钱于对社会负责是不矛盾的,某种程度上统一了
当然也有可能会有一次一些对社会有还的行为,但不是人人都能预先判断什么有害什么无害,所以他们只能依法办事
最后提出,尽快的立法是解决公司在赚钱中危害社会的主要办法,做一点延伸,不知道好不好
all my dream
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in every possible, possible, possible way

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发表于 2004-4-9 21:39:01 |只看该作者
Undoubtedly,(用得挺好的) one most essential purpose of corporation is to make money. Thus, it is the obligation of corporation executives(用corporate executives吧,题目中是这样用的) to make as much money as possible for their companies, of course, provided they stay within the law. While, some people hold the opinion that the responsibility for the society is also necessary for the corporations own something to the society and should try to avoid potential harmless during their process of making money. (这句话看不太懂了,own 和should try 是不是并列的?)However, I doubt the practical value of this statement and insist that limit of the harmful behaviors should be prescribed in law.

On one hand, common wisdom tells us that the interests of the corporations, which is(are) most related to how many profits they make, build upon and are not mutually exclusive with the interests of society. More money a corporation gets, more can it add the revenue of a nation(country吧).(是the more, the more 结构吧) More prosperous a corporation becomes perhaps more job opportunities can it provides the unemployed. What is more, a profitable corporation, on balance, tends to donate some of their money to the society in order to solve some social problems, such as AIDS problem, education deficits, environment problems and the like. In short, as the society's prosperity partly benefit from the corporation's thrive, in a sense, no corporate executive can shirk the responsibility of make(making) more dollars to the corporation.
公司利益和社会利益是可以兼得得

On the other hand, it is hard for corporate executives to realize the behaviors that may harm the society. Although people may argue that the corporations also to some extent depend on the society, and law does not in all cases prevent the executives from harming the society deliberately or not, there lies a question that, when the legislators can not discover that kind of politics or actions, how can a corporate executive know? Admittedly, law is unable to protect all interests of society and prevent all the harmful behaviors immediately, but it does not follow that other people, including the executives, can realize them soon. A factory that drained their waste water, which was fraught with toxic elements, might found out (cause)the latent disaster. However, when factories crazily sold the refrigerator with the element that polluted the ozone(polluted 用的不合适,污染臭氧?), no one, executives, consumers or the scientists paid attention to this problem until decades later. The possibility exist that executives are likely to remiss the potential harm of their behaviors on their way of making dollars, to some extent it is beyond their ability and obligation to always avoid hurting some of the society's interest.
主管很难发现自己的行为有损于社会
Then the burden of prescribing the harmful behaviors goes to the legislators. Although as analyzed above, they also cannot legal those behaviors in the interest of the majority and the society, they are the crucial people in determining whether those behaviors can be hampered as soon as possible. Suggestion of scientists and masses of people plays an important role as trace for them to note the underlying problems. Also, they should be acute towards all the changes in different fields of the society. So tough their work is, however, by this mean, those executives are more likely to do more good rather than harm to the society.
责任落在立法者身上
In sum, the responsibility of the executives is to make more profits to(for) the corporations as well as to the society; meanwhile, the prompt changes in the law are the crucial factor to prevent them from harming the society.
看完了,找不出多少语法错误,有些我已不敢肯定
谈一下真替感受吧,感觉有些词用的不是很准确
真替结构还不错
说以下内容,我认为重点应放在only responsibility make money, provided they stay within the law不应作为论述的重点,应该论述经理,得责任是什么,挣钱是不是唯一的责任,如果不唯一,还有哪些责任?

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发表于 2004-4-9 21:45:38 |只看该作者
用词确实是个问题,污染臭氧改成污染大气好了,pollute the atmosphere,the more,the more那错的真弱啊,呵呵。我决定开头得改改,我还是肯定only吧,老实说,很多企业手段得最终目的还是为了钱,不过也有真慈善家
all my dream
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in every possible, possible, possible way

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发表于 2004-4-10 12:49:50 |只看该作者
Issue152 第7篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧!
------摘要------
作者:寄托家园作文版普通用户 共用时间:45分2秒 563 words
从2004年3月9日16时53分到2004年3月9日17时45分
------题目------
The only responsibility of corporate executives, provided they stay within the law, is to make as much money as possible for their companies.
------正文------
Undoubtedly, one most essential purpose of corporation is to make money. Thus, it is the obligation of corporation executives to make as much money as possible for their companies, of course, provided they stay within the law. While, some people hold the opinion that the responsibility for the society is also necessary for the corporations own something to the society and should try to avoid potential harmless(??) during their process of making money. However, I doubt the practical value of this statement and insist that (加the) limit of the harmful behaviors should be prescribed in law.(开头有点长)

On one hand, common wisdom tells us that the interests of the corporations, which is most related to how many profits they make, build upon and are not mutually exclusive with the interests of society. More money a corporation gets, more can it add the revenue of a nation(the more… the more..). More prosperous a corporation becomes perhaps more job opportunities can it provides the unemployed. What is more, a profitable corporation, on balance, tends to donate some of their money to the society in order to solve some social problems, such as AIDS problem, education deficits, environment problems and the like. In short, as the society's prosperity partly benefit from the corporation's thrive, in a sense, no corporate executive can shirk the responsibility of make more dollars to the corporation.

On the other hand, it is hard for corporate executives to realize the behaviors that may harm the society. Although people may argue that the corporations also to some extent depend on the society, and law does not in all cases prevent the executives from harming the society deliberately or not,(这句结构有问题!!) there lies a question that, when the legislators can not discover that kind of politics or actions, how can a corporate executive know? Admittedly, law is unable to protect all interests of society and prevent all the harmful behaviors immediately, but it does not follow that other people, including the executives, can realize them soon. A factory that drained their waste water, which was fraught with toxic elements, might found out the latent disaster. However, when factories crazily sold the refrigerator with the element that polluted the ozone, no one, executives, consumers or the scientists paid attention to this problem until decades later. The possibility exist that executives are likely to remiss the potential harm of their behaviors on their way of making dollars, to some extent it is beyond their ability and obligation to always avoid hurting some of the society's interest.

Then the burden of prescribing the harmful behaviors goes to the legislators.(说的太远了吧??) Although as analyzed above, they also cannot legal those behaviors in the interest of the majority and the society, they are the crucial people in determining whether those behaviors can be hampered as soon as possible. Suggestion of scientists and masses of people plays(去s) an important role as trace for them to note the underlying problems. Also, they should be acute towards all the changes in different fields of the society. So tough their work is, however, by this mean, those executives are more likely to do more good rather than harm to the society.

In sum, the responsibility of the executives is to make more profits to the corporations as well as to the society, meanwhile, the prompt changes in the law are the crucial factor to prevent them from harming the society.

harm 用的太多,又不知道改成什么好:(----detrimental

------感觉你body 1 2 教好 3 太偏了
take your place in the great circle of life

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发表于 2004-4-10 13:42:47 |只看该作者
不知道第三段再怎么展,只好引申到立法上去了,目的是想提出个解决方案
或者可不可以先提一句,有人也许说,如果公司的人只管赚钱不管社会责任,会有很大危害,而我认为,这一责任应该落在立法者的身上
这样会好点么?或者有无什么其它点来展开
all my dream
is changing everywhere
in every possible, possible, possible way

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