[a习作temp] argument 10 Dream互改队绝对高频 [复制链接]

Chloroplast923
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发表于 2005-8-3 09:34:56 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

10The following appeared in a letter to the editor of a Batavia newspaper.

"The department of agriculture in Batavia reports that the number of dairy farms throughout the country is now 25 percent greater than it was 10 years ago. During this same time period, however, the price of milk at the local Excello Food Market has increased from $1.50 to over $3.00 per gallon. To prevent farmers from continuing to receive excessive profits on an apparently increased supply of milk, the Batavia government should begin to regulate retail milk prices. Such regulation is necessary to ensure both lower prices and an adequate supply of milk for consumers."

建议政府限制牛奶零售价,防止奶农获取过多利润并保证牛奶供应

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提纲:
1.质疑一个超市的售价有没有代表性
2.升价可能是由于通胀引起
3.全国奶牛场增多,但B地的奶牛场可能减少且规模变小.限制售价可能会导致更少奶牛场

正文:超18min 504words

In the above letter, the arguer suggests that thus dairy farms farmers are receiving excessive profits continually, the Batavia(B) government should begin to regulate retail milk price to ensure both lower prices and adequate supply of milk for consumers. To strong his or her opinion, the arguer cites a report submitted by the department of agriculture in B as evidence. Although this argument is well presented, it is not fully well reasoned. After careful analysis, we can find several flaws in the arguer's deducing.

In first place, the arguer suggests B government begin to regulate retail milk prices, because he or she thinks the dairy farms farmers are receiving excessive profits continually. However, the arguer fails to show any data well supports his or her views. It is true that during the past ten years, the price of milk in the local Excello Food Market has increased from $1.50 to over $3.00 per gallon, but it is dubious that whether this retail price in only one market, the local Excello Food Market, is representative enough? Possibly the price of every goods in this market is higher than in other supermarkets. Even this price is representative, the arguer still do not tell how much profit can the farmer get? What is the selling price of milk from farmers to the supermarket? Ruling out the cost of producing, how much benefits can farmers get? Is this benefits exceeding the standard of excessive profits? Since the arguer do not point out this numbers, it is unfair to assume that the farmers receive excessive profits continually, which is the point that the suggestion based on.

In second place, even though the retail price of milk has increased, it may be caused by some other factors rather than the wills of dairy farms farmers, such as inflation. In case of a inflation, not only the price of milk, but also the price of almost anything else goes up. And in this case, the cost of producing milk increases, thus farmers may earn relatively the same or even less than ten years before. If the B government regulates the retail price of milk without considering this, it will be so unfair to the farmers.

Finally, in the report finished by the department of agriculture in B, the number of dairy farms throughout the country is now 25 percent greater than it was 10years ago. However, it is very possible that although the number of dairy farms increased in the countrywide, the number in B is decreased. And maybe although the numbers of dairy farms in B increased, the sizes of them decreased. In this case, if the B government regulates the retail price of milk, same farms will leave this market making insufficient supply of milk for consumers.

As discussed above, there are so many uncertain factors, which influence the retail price of milk. To rule out all the influencing factors, the arguer needs to provide more data and background information. Only in this way, can the argument be convincing.

[ Last edited by Chloroplast923 on 2005-8-3 at 09:37 ]

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沙发

发表于 2005-8-3 10:36:08 |只看该作者

提纲:
1.质疑一个超市的售价有没有代表性
2.升价可能是由于通胀引起
3.全国奶牛场增多,但B地的奶牛场可能减少且规模变小.限制售价可能会导致更少奶牛场

正文:超18min  504words

In the above letter, the arguer suggests that thus dairy farms farmers are receiving excessive profits continually, the Batavia(B) government should begin to regulate retail milk price to ensure both lower prices and adequate supply of milk for consumers. To strong his or her opinion, the arguer cites a report submitted by the department of agriculture in B as evidence. Although this argument is well presented, it is not fully well reasoned. After careful analysis, we can find several flaws in the arguer's deducing.个人认为没必要复述原文,节约时间

In first place, the arguer suggests B government begin to regulate retail milk prices, because he or she thinks the dairy farms [去掉]farmers are receiving excessive profits continually. However, the arguer fails to show any data well supports his or her views. It is true that during the past ten years, the price of milk in the local Excello Food Market has increased from $1.50 to over $3.00 per gallon, but it is dubious that whether this retail price in only one market, the local Excello Food Market, is representative enough? [句号]Possibly the price of every goods in this market is higher than in other supermarkets. Even this price is representative, the arguer still do not tell [tell us ]how much profit can the farmer get? [句号]What is the selling price of milk from farmers to the supermarket? Ruling out the cost of producing, how much benefits can farmers get? Is this benefits exceeding the standard of excessive profits? Since the arguer do not point out this numbers[这个表达我没见过,不确定], it is unfair to assume that the farmers receive excessive profits continually, which is the point that the suggestion [is]based on.数据不可靠

In second place, even though the retail price of milk has increased, it may be caused by some other factors rather than the wills of dairy farms farmers, such as inflation. In case of a inflation, not only the price of milk, but also the price of almost anything else goes up. And in this case, the cost of producing milk increases, thus farmers may earn relatively the same or even less than ten years before. If the B government regulates the retail price of milk without considering this, it will be so unfair to the farmers.他因

Finally, in the report finished by the department of agriculture in B, the number of dairy farms throughout the country is now 25 percent greater than it was 10years ago. However, it is very possible that although the number of dairy farms increased in the countrywide, the number in B is decreased. And maybe although the numbers of dairy farms in B increased, the sizes of them decreased. In this case, if the B government regulates the retail price of milk, same farms will leave this market making insufficient supply of milk for consumers. 百分率

As discussed above, there are so many uncertain factors, which influence the retail price of milk. To rule out all the influencing factors, the arguer needs to provide more data and background information. Only in this way, can the argument be convincing.

我的思路和你不一样,习惯从题目的逻辑关系入手
题目: a: 农场数目增加
   b:张价
   c:利多
   d:To prevent farmers from continuing to receive excessive profits on an apparently increased supply of milk,

      (b---->c)----->d<------a

1. b是否能推出c
2.c是否能推出d
3. a能否保证supply是充足的, 且在调价之后也充足
由此为主线,然后把数据不可靠之类作为论据来展开反驳

一点意见
:)

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