寄托家园留学论坛 › 论坛 › 寄托语言类备考版 › TOEFL考试(IBT)讨论版 › 【Dark_Tournament TOEFL-ibt作文小组 gaofei323 的第2 ...

返回列表

查看: 958|回复: 5

[活动] 【Dark_Tournament TOEFL-ibt作文小组 gaofei323 的第20次作业】 [复制链接]

gaofei323
UID??2588256

荣誉版主

Rank: 9 Rank: 9 Rank: 9

声望: 653
寄托币: 9603
注册时间: 2009-1-5
精华: 1
帖子: 45

电梯直达

楼主

发表于 2009-4-11 17:34:27 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

Do you accustom to read newspapers to be kept informing of what is going on in the world? Or do you like to surf on the internet to get information on what you interested in? Nowadays, a number of people think these things are meaningless in that they have little influence on people’s own life. Is it true? In my opinion, however, events occurred in every corner of the world may affect you in direct or indirect way and learning these things benefit you in every aspect of life.

In the first place, to understand what happened in the world could dramatically broaden people’s horizon and increase their knowledge in various fields. Take the American President Election in 2008 for example. As one of the most developed country in the world, America provides an advanced political system and all the features could be represented in the process of this election. From it you could learn how American use their democratic right to select their president, and how government use election to chose the most outstanding person to be their leader. More important, on book or teacher could impart these knowledge as vivid as directly watching it does. In a short, through the events we could gain more practical knowledge.

To back my point up, knowing the events could stimulate your potential ability to gain a more successful life. As is known to all, the skills you earn from school would undoubtedly be practiced in real life. So to be familiar with what the real world is can lead a right direction for your further development and describe a possibly attractive situation of your future. For example, if you desire to get a job in economic area, the information on the Wall Street is so valuable that the most professional economists and those famous company may impel you work harder now. And one day, Wall Street will be your destination if you insist on walking on the way. So, knowing the real events urges you to endeavor to achieve your dream.

Last but not least, keeping touch with the events around the world can bring tremendous happiness to you and the people around you. For instance, in my country there are over 100 million audiences who used to watch NBA game every weekend. Does how these famous players perform have something to do with the audiences? Of course not, in fact, however, some of them paid more enthusiasm than any other work. Why? Answer is simply enough that this game could bring them pleasure and release the pressure both from career and family, and it also provide a opportunity to develop the friendship to someone who had common interests with you, In a conclusion, appreciating what you interested in, even it seems to have nothing to do with your well-being, could make your life more enjoyable and colorful.

To sum it up, events around deserve to be paid attention for everybody as the reason that it could increase your knowledge, encourage your study, and bring more happiness to your life.

回应
0

使用道具举报

legolastu
UID??2453793

寄托新兵

Rank: 2

声望: 0
寄托币: 130
注册时间: 2008-1-31
精华: 0
帖子: 0

沙发

发表于 2009-4-13 19:16:23 |只看该作者

Do you accustom to read newspapers to be kept informing(informed)of what is going on in the world? Or do you like to surf on the internet to get information on what(which) you are interested in(感觉语法有问题，按照我的理解改了一下)? Nowadays, a number of people think these things are meaningless in that they have little influence on people’s own life. Is it true? In my opinion, however, events occurred in every corner of the world may affect you in direct or indirect way and learning these things benefit you in every aspect of life.赞主题句，疑问开头也很不错

A( t7 q, Q; P8 H
In the first place, to understand what happened in the world could dramatically broaden people’s horizon and increase their knowledge in various fields. Take the American President Election in 2008 for example. As one of the most developed countries in the world, America provides an advanced political system and all the features could be represented in the process of this election. From it you could learn how American use their democratic rights to select their president, and how government uses election to choose the most outstanding person to be their leader. More important, on book or teacher could impart these knowledge as vivid as directly watching it does. (我理解了很久，没明白是什么语法...)In a short, through the events we could gain more practical knowledge.

3 [* n$ i
To back my point up, knowing the events could stimulate your potential ability to gain a more successful life. As is known to all, the skills you earn from school would undoubtedly be practiced(感觉practical比较好) in real life. So to be familiar with what the real world is can lead a right direction for your further development and describe a possibly attractive situation of your future. For example, if you desire to get a job in economic area, the information on the Wall Street is so valuable that the most professional economists and those famous company may impel you work harder now. And one day, Wall Street will be your destination if you insist on walking on the way. So, knowing the real events urges you to endeavor to achieve your dream.

Last but not least, keeping touch with the events around the world can bring tremendous happiness to you and the people around you. For instance, in my country there are over 100 million audiences who used to watch NBA game every weekend. Does how these famous players perform have something to do with the audiences? Of course not, in fact, however, some of them paid more enthusiasm than any other work. Why? Answer is simply enough that this game could bring them pleasure and release the pressure both from career and family, and it also provide an opportunity to develop the friendship to(with) someone who had common interests with you. In a conclusion, appreciating what you are interested in, even if it seems to have nothing to do with your well-being, could make your life more enjoyable and colorful.

~- Z" Z- N
To sum it(有这个用法吗？) up, events around deserve to be paid attention for everybody as the reason that it could increase your knowledge, encourage your study, and bring more happiness to your life.

1 介词和助词的使用需要注意
2 开头和结尾不错，恩

使用道具举报

legolastu
UID??2453793

寄托新兵

Rank: 2

声望: 0
寄托币: 130
注册时间: 2008-1-31
精华: 0
帖子: 0

板凳

发表于 2009-4-13 19:16:56 |只看该作者

欢迎回拍哈

http://bbs.gter.ce.cn/bbs/thread-941184-1-1.html

使用道具举报

babff
UID??2539532

寄托新兵

Rank: 2

声望: 0
寄托币: 254
注册时间: 2008-8-31
精华: 0
帖子: 1

地板

发表于 2009-4-15 13:00:44 |只看该作者

不好意思。。。我晚上十一点前帮你的拍好。呵呵。最近很忙

使用道具举报

gaofei323
UID??2588256

荣誉版主

Rank: 9 Rank: 9 Rank: 9

声望: 653
寄托币: 9603
注册时间: 2009-1-5
精华: 1
帖子: 45

5楼

发表于 2009-4-15 14:58:57 |只看该作者

没关系~ 有什么要紧的事就先做这个不急呵呵

使用道具举报

babff
UID??2539532

寄托新兵

Rank: 2

声望: 0
寄托币: 254
注册时间: 2008-8-31
精华: 0
帖子: 1

6楼

发表于 2009-4-15 22:59:12 |只看该作者

Do（are） you accustom to read newspapers to be kept informing of what is going on in the world? Or do you like to surf on the internet to get information on(about) what you interested in? Nowadays, a number of people think these things are meaningless in that they have little influence on people’s own life(person life). Is it true? In my opinion, however,(多余) events occurred in every corner of the world may affect you in direct or indirect way and learning these things benefit you in every aspect of life.

In the first place, to understand what happened in the world could dramatically broaden people’s horizon and increase their knowledge in various fields. Take the American President Election in 2008 for example. As one of the most developed country in the world, America provides an advanced political system and all the features could be represented in the（去掉） process of this election. From it you could learn how American use their democratic right to select their president, and how government uses election to chose the most outstanding person to be their leader(chose the …..leader through the election). More important, on book or teacher could impart these knowledge as vivid as directly watching it does. In a short, through the events we could gain more practical knowledge.

To back my point up, knowing the events could stimulate your potential ability to gain a more successful life. As is known to all, the skills you earn from school would undoubtedly be practiced in real life. So to be familiar with what the real world is can lead a right direction for your further development and describe a possibly attractive situation of your future. For example, if you desire to get a job in economic area, the information on the Wall Street is so valuable that the most professional economists and those famous company may impel you work harder now. And one day, Wall Street will be your destination if you insist on walking on the way(有点Cnglish). So, knowing the real events urges you to endeavor to achieve your dream.'
Last but not least, keeping touch with the events around the world can bring tremendous happiness to you and the people around you. For instance, in my country there are over 100 million audiences who used to watch NBA game every weekend. Does how these famous players perform have something to do with the audiences? Of course not, in fact, however, some of them paid more enthusiasm than any other work. Why? Answer is simply enough that this game could bring them pleasure and release the pressure both from career and family, and it also provides a opportunity to develop the friendship to someone who had common interests with you, In a conclusion, appreciating what you interested in, even it seems to have nothing to do with your well-being, could make your life more enjoyable and colorful.* Q, ^9 e9 l* s. n
7 Y9 o& @' E' Y# `) ` a5 w
To sum it up, events around deserve to be paid attention for everybody as the reason that it could increase your knowledge, encourage your study, and bring more happiness to your life.

(童鞋的句式很多变。。。文章构造也很好。。。值得学习)

使用道具举报