14年秋季提纲互改小组-issue62

maoerdwnUID: 3551290

tesolchina 发表于 2014-11-3 22:50
或许你可以看下我写的全文再提问
https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mod=viewthread&tid=1777232&page=5#pi ...

啊老师，我当然看过您的全文。可是感觉您的全文的论点和这里您的提纲示范是不同的，您的全文的分论点是说1、在满足需求前，若有交流能力、经历和资格，就可成为领导。2、特定前提下（突发且小概率事件）可能没有资历培养，直接因为需求成为领导。这里能力和需求是分立的。
然而这里列的提纲，交流能力和经验、资历都是为了满足需求，而不满足需求的领导会下课。强调了能力与需求之间的关系，也就是在说，即使能力非常重要，但能力也是为了满足需求的，而没有能力也就是不能满足需求，所以说需求造就领导就是正确的。
突然感觉第二种理解也是挺好的一种肯定题设的思路~  感谢老师解答~

tesolchinaUID: 2191404

maoerdwn 发表于 2014-11-4 22:29
啊老师，我当然看过您的全文。可是感觉您的全文的论点和这里您的提纲示范是不同的，您的全文的分论点是说 ...

我写全文的时候感觉提纲有一定的困难 所以调整了一下  
这道题感觉不太好写  

max940623UID: 3559548

V1
TS
A leader is something few could be, but many aspire to be. Admittedly, their appearance always respond to certain demand from the followers. But the creation of the leaders also combines their own ability and character. In addition, those who is both capable and ambitious to be the leaders could even produce the demand and promote themselves at the first place.

Ts1 短期
Demand appears to create the leaders because it always comes from the followers, whose existence forms the fundamental of leadership in short term. 要做领袖的前提是要获得跟随者的支持。当人民需要这个领袖时，这个前提就被满足了，所以就产生短期的领袖。举例：野蛮的英格兰需要第一个王，于是就有了亚瑟王(不知道传说合不合适)。一战后没落的德国需要一个强硬领袖站出来，于是有了希特勒。

Ts2 长期
However, the true leaders should also go through the examination on their capacity and personality. 接着说上面的例子，亚瑟王响应需求只是一部分，同时他的能力品格（拔出石中剑，聚集圆桌骑士）也是他能成为国家领袖的关键。反之，希特勒能力强但品性不端，不能长久地作为领袖。

Ts3不止需求产生领袖，有时领袖能制造需求
As a matter of the fact, some competent prospective leaders may even choose to create the demand on their own, then coronate themselves.
举例，陈胜吴广在鱼腹加白绸“陈胜王”，学狐狸叫“大楚兴陈胜王”都是为了制造人们对领袖的需求，进而成就自己作为领袖。拿破仑也有相关事迹。

tesolchinaUID: 2191404

max940623 发表于 2014-11-6 13:16
V1
TS
A leader is something few could be, but many aspire to be. Admittedly, their appearance alw ...

Issue 62
Leaders are created by the demands that are placed on them.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

V1
TS
A leader is something few could be, but many aspire to be. Admittedly, their appearance always respond to certain demand from the followers. But the creation of the leaders also combines their own ability and character. In addition, those who is both capable and ambitious to be the leaders could even produce the demand and promote themselves at the first place.


我看了你的几个主题句后觉得整体的思路是不错的
但是你的主旨句并没有将这几个点串起来 或许 你要更严格的执行1+3的模型

I agree that in the short term leaders are often created by the demands placed on them. But in the long term the leaders have to demonstrate a set of qualities in order to fulfill the demands. Moreover, some remarkable individuals  may have the ability to create the demand for leadership in order to become a leader.

你能在两段里重复使用例子 这个做法很好！

Ts1 短期
Demand appears to create the leaders because it always comes from the followers, whose existence forms the fundamental of leadership in short term. 要做领袖的前提是要获得跟随者的支持。当人民需要这个领袖时，这个前提就被满足了，所以就产生短期的领袖。举例：野蛮的英格兰需要第一个王，于是就有了亚 瑟王(不知道传说合不合适)。一战后没落的德国需要一个强硬领袖站出来，于是有了希特勒。



Ts2 长期
However, the true leaders should also go through the examination on their capacity and personality. 接着说上面的例子，亚瑟王响应需求只是一部分，同时他的能力品格（拔出石中剑，聚集圆桌骑士）也是他能成为国家领袖的关键。反之，希特勒能力强但品性不 端，不能长久地作为领袖。



Ts3不止需求产生领袖，有时领袖能制造需求
As a matter of the fact, some competent prospective leaders may even choose to create the demand on their own, then coronate themselves.
举例，陈胜吴广在鱼腹加白绸“陈胜王”，学狐狸叫“大楚兴陈胜王”都是为了制造人们对领袖的需求，进而成就自己作为领袖。拿破仑也有相关事迹。

具体语言表达估计还会遇到一些困难  

skywongchiuUID: 3261705

請老師給予意見

Issue 62
Leaders are created by the demands that are placed on them.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

TS
The speaker argues that the demands are a critical factor to create leaders. It is true that leaders in the fields of government and business are created by the demands. However, while the discussion extends to the area of scientific research, leaders are not created by the demands.

Ts1
To start with, I confess that demands are the most important factor affecting the creation of leaders in the field of government. 一個政治人物被稱呼為領導的主要原因是他/她可以把民眾的政治需要實踐。更詳細地說, 當民眾表達出他/她們的政治需要, 同一時間, 一位政治人物把他/她們的需要實踐起來。這一個人便會被稱為領導。For example, 在2008美國選舉的時候, 大多數選民都希望國家有一個改變, 而奧巴馬 – 總統後選人 – 把選民的意願實踐了。奧巴馬因此被稱為領導。

Ts2
Furthermore, while it comes to the area of business, the creation of leadership always associates with the demands that are belonging to non-leadership individuals such as the general grade staff and the investors of the company. 非領導者時常希望可以找到一個有能力的人充當他/她們的領導人, 從而令到他/她們所屬的公司可以維持增長。換一句話說, 若果某人有能力實踐非領導者的需要 - 領導公司得到長久的增長 – 這個人便會被稱為領導者。 For instance, 因為Steve Jobs 帶領領苹果公司走向一個長久增長的行業, 他被稱為苹果公司的領導者。

Ts3
However, the speaker’s argument cannot be valid and convincing while it comes to the area of scientific research. The creation of leaders does associate with the subjects’ abilities, instead of the demands, in this field. 某人被稱為科研的領導者, 是因為他/她們擁有非凡的能力, 創造出了全新的產品和改變了產品使用者過往的需要。換一句話說, 這個新的產品和產品使用者過往的需要是沒有太大直接的關係。For instance, 愛迪生發明的燈泡和燈泡使用者對lighting 的需要是不同的。當時, 人們只是希望可以生產出更光的蜡烛; 他們沒有想像過要利用電力去產生lighting。愛迪生沒有跟隨社會的需要去生產更光亮的蜡烛; 他跑去生產利用電力產生Lighting的燈泡。新的燈泡比傳統的更光和更有效能。為了表揚這位天才的貢獻, 人物稱他為科研的領導者。

黑白沉默UID: 3486497

Issue 62
Leaders are created by the demands that are placed on them.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

自我分析：思路还是比较局限，感觉自己想的东西偏牵强了些。中间有一个分论点把leaders的概念扩大了，不知道是不是科学。

Demands play different roles on the generation of different leaders. While political leaders are created by the demands that are placed on them, market leaders, namely leading enterprises in a certain field, are created because of their unique and creative products or services that surpass people's demands. Other kinds of leaders, such as opinion leaders emerge due to outside demands, as well as their inner abilities and skills.

Political leaders are created by the demands that are placed on them.因为群众们需要有一个和平稳定的社会，需要系统的规则来约束他们的行为，需要有一个发展方向，所以政治家为满足人民的需求应运而生。举例：从哥伦布发现新大陆到英国殖民，美洲大陆这片土地上都是没有共同领导者的。但随着文明的发展，随着人们对自由的渴望日益增加，独立战争爆发，华盛顿就任美国总统，带领人们为了他们的需求而奋斗。

Market leading enterprises, on the other hand, are created because of their unique and creative products or services that surpass people's demands. 不同于国家领导为了国民的需求而存在，一个公司如果想要领导市场，则不能等人民有了需求，他们往往可以成为引领市场需求的人。在苹果公司崛起之前，没有人想过平板电脑或者智能手机是怎么样的，也没有人对于这些产品有任何需求。是他们跨时代的产品iphone和ipad让人们产生了需求。

Moreover, opinion Leaders emerge due to outside demands, as well as their inner critical thinking abilities. 意见领袖的产生一方面是因为人们需要和她们一样的普通人，对于社会信息形成他们可相信的意见观点，以他们更容易接受的方式将信息传播给他们。同时，他们之所以能从普通人中脱颖而出，也因为他们本身的思考能力强。如中国微博达人“作业本”曾经就一件“救人被反咬”时间第一时间评论，上升到伦理道德高度，所以拥有数万粉丝，成为意见领袖。

maoerdwnUID: 3551290

黑白沉默 发表于 2014-11-27 15:04
Issue 62
Leaders are created by the demands that are placed on them.
Write a response in which you ...

冒昧给你提个问题：
第二段中说公司领袖与需求无关，把对领导的需求转成了消费者对产品的需求，是不是不太好。因为题目中没有限定是谁的需求，只要是领袖承担的都可以。即使消费者对公司领袖没有需求，公司对它的领袖不也和国家一样是有需求的吗？

zsczslUID: 2888426

王老师好，请点评一下我的这篇大纲，谢谢！

62. Leaders are created by the demands that are placed on them.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

TS (pt1, pt2, pt3): The political schools and business schools around the world are always attempting to discover how an individual become a competent leader, since one of their main jobs is to impart leadership to their students. Some argue that all the leaders result from the requests that they are faced with. While I agree that the external requirements are essential for the creation of a leader, other factors play significant roles during the development of leaders. In fact, just as market prices depend on levels of supply and demand, the leaders are created by the interaction between the supply of some capabilities or skills and the demand for them.  

ts (pt1): On the one hand, I cannot deny that certain groups of people’s demands are very crucial as for the emergence of leaders. 外部需求肯定是领导诞生的一个决定性方面，比如当年北美人民 要是并不想要寻求独立，那就没有美国国父华盛顿、杰弗逊等人出来领导大家，并立下丰功伟绩了。

ts (pt2): On the other hand, if everyone in a group lacks the necessary abilities or skills, there will not be a capable leader in this group and it is doomed to fail.  个人自身的能力也是领导必不可少的方面，要是华盛顿没有在英军中服役的经历，没有足够的军事才能，他也当不成大陆军总司令。如果杰弗逊没有在大学里认真学习，不具备相应文采和对民主的理解，他也无法写出the Declaration of Independence。假设当年北美人民虽然寻求独立，但千呼万唤都不出现华盛顿、杰弗逊等能满足他们要求的美国国父们，那么还是不会有，至少是不会有称职的领导。

ts (p3): In reality, human beings have learned how to satisfy different persons’ needs for leadership through the demand-led mechanism. 人们现在已经建立了一套完备的教育体系，将人们对领导的需求和领导的产生结合起来。例如，当代商业领域需要能懂经济、会谈判、能凝聚人心的领导，各国的商学院就提供课程相应课程，来培养学生这方面的能力和技能。这突出了需求在如今领导诞生过程中的重要性，但供应方面也是不能忽略的。