kaolaliang独立写作 作文贴

kaolaliangUID: 2758807

Does the more lesuire time is better than other one asserts in the topic? It should depend on each individual's requirment, which judge the job is better or not. There're mant people want to have the wonderful life, who should wonder the job with more vacation time is better. And some people feel that they need more money to maintein their life, so that they should suggest the latter one is more avaliable. In my view, choose the suited job should rely on your own wish.
   Admittedly high salary job is admired by most of people, without the glorious appearance, which may always take most of your life tiem to get it. Firstly, we should spend more time to finish the job even though it's endlss, than most of "on-time" job. Secondly, noormally the company appreciate people's ablitily when the high salary affort to him/her meanwhile the requirmented responsblity also should equal to the allowance, which means less rest may happen. So most of high salary job couldn't apply to the more vacation, which always foolow extend time of working.
  Futhermore, the purpose of working people will have their own beliefs. Most of people are realistic in the world, they will apply for the high salary job, which could help them to live better in this high price society. However, there's many people require not only the material but also something insides. And vacation has become the most favorite time, which could do the own things and may achieve something about their dreams, thus only the flaw is that may not have enough money to come true those things. So how to judge a way of working should be judged by a person's own worth.
  At last, nowadays many aspects should be supported by money, includiing own dreams, so busy working or relaxed working is borned, when a person manages to choose a job. When a graduate student choose a job may not think about outsies without learning from job, however when he has worked for periods times, may he think about outsides of working, then difficent choice must be encounted, morover, two kinds of groups have generated. There's no mistake to choose anyone of the two, that are both of life style, but different life attitudes.
   So, fundamently I agree with the topic. What the bettert job is, in my view, that is choose the job suit to your current life, which will help you to arrive your dream stably.

ilnlhUID: 2641884

拼写错误，Word标出来的可以先自己改一下
需要检查一下每段对中心句的支持，并不充分
表达有些中式化，还是增加阅读量 多思考一下吧；多考虑同义替换（in my view = in my opinion = from my point of view / standpoint），论坛上应该也有类似总结；很多句子可以尝试找一下主干看是否通顺
作文属于正式文体，不要缩写，可以参看一下TIME等在线书报
个人建议还是使用空行、顶格的格式，看上去更清楚些
语法：注意下单复数；and, so是连词，不出现在句首，thus, however是副词，不用来连接两句话...

junedreamjuneUID: 2700743

Does the more lesuire time is better than other one asserts in the topic(?)? It should depend on each individual's requirment, which judge the job is better or not(delete). There're mant people (who) want to have the wonderful life, who should(?) wonder the job with more vacation time is better. And some people feel that they need more money to maintein their life, so that they should suggest the latter one (delete) is more avaliable. In my view, choose the suited job should rely on your own wish.
Admittedly high salary job is admired by most of people, without the glorious appearance, which may always take most of your life tiem to get it(?). Firstly, we should spend more time to finish the job even though it's endlss, than most of "on-time" job. Secondly, noormally the company appreciate people's ablitily when the high salary affort to him/her meanwhile the requirmented responsblity also should equal to the allowance, which means less rest may happen. So most of high salary job couldn't apply to the more vacation, which always foolow extend time of working.7 U, X0 I& R9 w3 V
Futhermore, the purpose of working people (?) will have their own beliefs. Most of people are realistic in the world, they will apply for the high salary job, which could help them to live better in this high price society. However, there's (there are) many people require(requirng) not only the material but also something insides(psychological). And vacation has become the most favorite time, which could do the own things and may achieve something about their dreams, thus only the flaw is that may not have enough money to come true those things. So how to judge a way of working should be judged by a person's own worth.( o1 E1 @0 W2 H0 W1 u/ z8 Y
  At last, nowadays many aspects should be supported by money, includiing own dreams, so busy working or relaxed working is borned, when a person manages to choose a job. When a graduate student choose a job (he) may not think about outsies without learning from job, however when he has worked for periods times, may he (倒装？) think about outsides of working, then difficent choice must be encounted, morover, two kinds of groups have generated. There's no mistake to choose anyone of the two, that are both of life style, but different life attitudes.4 s, ~" y, K) w, ?. d+ u
So, fundamently I agree with the topic. What the bettert job is, in my view, that is choose the job（those） suitable to your current life, which will help you to arrive your dream stably.

语法和拼写错误不少，有些句子读不懂，有些地方chinglish。建议不要一味运用从句、复杂句式，确保表达清楚、语法正确最重要。希望这些建议有帮助~一起加油吧~

kaolaliangUID: 2758807

Successful people take new things and take risks rather than the thing that they've done well


The topic suggests the successful people should challenge new and risk things instead of doing what they are familiar with. In my point of view, do what is good at, that may lead you to the successful.

To begin with, how to identify the successful is divided into two branches. Some people argues the result , others take advantage of process. I agree with the resulting theory. Nowadays most people in society commonly admit what a person have done to be a standard of judgment , and if it’s case of failure people often ignore the process. Few people pay attention about what type of things you choose and the proceeding, which means only successful could make people resize how the people choose the things and how to struggle for the glory. So make people recognize you’re successful is the most important.

Additionally, how to make others believe you’re achieve the success? As the topic suggests that chooses unfamiliar or contrast could be confused by selected. What I suppose to do is the latter one. For example, a man joins a new company, work with a team, he must do something excellent to let teamers receive him, so that let’s guess what type of works he will choose, may most of you choose handled things what could be achieved during limited period. Furthermore, to be successful cautiously, may choose the familiar could be more stable than others.

In this material gain society, we usually put the result as the most important judgement, so choose the new and risk things when you are not care about the results and other’s judgement.

zoltinmaUID: 2672743

修改完毕~

问题较多。
不过只要努力，肯定会有很大进步的！
一起加油~

kaolaliangUID: 2758807

In order to solve the problems of the present and future, it is necessary to understand the past.


  What do people study from the history lecture? Expect the knowledge, they should have more thingkings about the relationship between past and present that is real purpose to learn history. As the topic says that understand the past is a great deal of help for present.  I totally agree with the assertion. The history could teach us to avoid formed mistakes and we can create something new from past events.
  On the first hand, history has many same aspects as nowadays. People can figure out what is right, what is wrong, what is undetermined, and they may save much time on make decisions.  For example, the climate maybe the best explaintion. People often use the old experices in the past as one of judements to predict weather, usually it's accurately to report rainy season, when the typhoon come, when people should protect the flood. The history recorded many regual and assimilar events so that people could find their interest ways to help them. History is not only helpful under these suitation, but also accelerate new borned.
  Secondly, if people are familiar with the history and current, may make creation and revolution during his activies. As we know, many scientists build their theroies with other scientists' developed theroies, if they do not study these formers' articles, defintly formation time of the theroy msut be delayed, evenmore the improvement of the theroy should not take much progress. So can you image if we igored the invetion of powder the iamge of world today? Can you think out if we donnt know Edison create the light what should happen in nowadays? And if we donnot get the basic math information, do you know what is "Apollo Project"?
   The history is helpful for us, we should use it effectly to create better life nowadays and future.

kaolaliangUID: 2758807

It is more important to reserve land for human beings than for endangered animals.,


More endanger animals have happened, and less land is accepted by most of people nowadays, so that the discussion of how to allocate narrow land is brought up. Parts of people figure out human being should own the land, the others insist endangered animal have higher priority than human. In my point of view, I support human being should dominant these lands.
On the first hand, it’s common sense to recognize that human being is the real cause to make these animal to be endangered, so if endangered animals live in, how can we prove them not to be extinct? At least, human being owns the land, with the proper protection, the endangered, they can live longer and safer. For example, panda is famous in the world, not only his cute appearance, also because of their limited num whom can be count out exact number in the whole world. With these situations China has decided protect them in a special area, scientists and workers help them live comfortably there, panda’s number is increasing significantly recent years. Thus, human being could prevent these endangered animals from depopulation on the special land.
Moreover, people could use the land to create most compatible environment for these animals. Nowadays, many environment’s problems are caused by some people, however others can prevent some place from polluting and they also have ability to provide some fantasy living conditions. It’s benefit for these animals.
At last, the animals have a bad adaptive capability towards complex environment changed. Why the more and more endangered animals have happened? Expect for human beings, their own survival faculty is become weaker than before. So we should “breed” them and cannot let them develop optional.
It should be accepted by most of people, endangered animals’ protection should not only put them in a place where could be threatened by human beings, but also human being should plan them how to live longer and better. Therefore, I insist on the land should be charged by human being.

lxg198607UID: 2564115

It is more important to reserve land for human beings than for endangered animals.,6 U- @4 `0 t: f  E$ m8 C9 L, \6 f
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More endanger animals have happened（这词感觉用的不妥。）, and less land is accepted（为什么用这词，不解）by most of people nowadays, so that the discussion of how to allocate narrow land is brought up. Parts of people figure out human being should own the land, the others insist endangered animal have higher priority than human. In my point of view, I support human being should dominant these lands.
On the first hand, it’s common sense to recognize that human being is the real cause to make these animal to be endangered, so if endangered animals live in, how can we prove (是prevent吗)them not to be extinct? At least, human being owns the land, with the proper protection, the endangered, they can live longer and safer. For example, panda is famous in the world, not only his cute appearance, also because of their limited num（number） whom can be count out exact number(count precisely) in the whole world. With these situations China has decided protect them in a special area, scientists and workers help them live comfortably there, panda’s number is increasing significantly recent years. Thus, human being could prevent these endangered animals from depopulation on the special land.3 E. `) ]+ M% M& }, L' R- L
Moreover, people could use the land to create most compatible environment for these animals. Nowadays, many environment’s problems are caused by some people, however others can prevent some place from polluting and they also have ability to provide some fantasy living conditions. It’s benefit for these animals.
At last, the animals have a bad adaptive capability towards complex environment changed. Why the more and more endangered animals have happened? Expect for human beings, their own survival faculty is become weaker than before. So we should “breed” them and cannot let them develop optional.
It should be accepted by most of people, endangered animals’ protection should not only put them in a place where could be threatened by human beings, but also human being should plan them how to live longer and better. Therefore, I insist on the land should be charged by human being.（感觉楼主对题目的理解根我不太一样啊。）

WINNIE678UID: 2556716

More endanger animals have happened(?), and less land is accepted by most of people nowadays, so that the discussion of how to allocate narrow land is brought up. some Parts of people figure out human being should own the land, the others insist endangered animal have higher priority than human. In my point of view, I support human being should dominant these lands.
On   one  the first hand, it’s common sense to recognize that human being is the real cause to make these animal to be endangered, so if endangered animals live in, how can we prove them not to be extinct? At least, human being owns the land, with the proper protection, the endangered, they can live longer and safer. For example, panda is famous in the world, not only his cute appearance, also because of their limited num whom can be count out exact number in the whole world. under With these situations China has decided protect them in a special area, scientists and workers help them live comfortably there, panda’s number is increasing significantly recent years. Thus, human being could prevent these endangered animals from depopulation on the special land.0 A3 {' {3 U  U
Moreover, people could use the land to create most compatible environment for these animals. Nowadays, many environment’s problems are caused by some people, however others can prevent some place from polluting and they also have ability to provide some fantasy living conditions. It’s benefit for these animals.
At last, the animals have a bad adaptive capability towards complex environment changed. Why the more and more endangered animals have happened? Expect for这个词用的不对吧 human beings, their own survival faculty is become weaker than before. So we should “breed” them and cannot let them develop optionally.
It should be accepted by most of people, endangered animals’ protection should not only put them in a place where could be threatened by human beings, but also human being should plan them how to live longer and better. Therefore, I insist on the land should be charged by human being.

kaolaliangUID: 2758807

Students would receive a better, effective education if they were required to attend classes for 11 months of a year.

    It's a complex question about how to provid a better education for students. Discuss about this has not ended, in my opint of view what is more applied for most kids, that is mor effect. As the topic asserts, nobody will accept take up 11 moths of a year on studying, so in my view arrange logic time should be replaced by the topic.
    To begin with, students have their own energe that is limited, overload may lead contrast result.
    Moreover, teachers will be borne by the long term.
    So we should arrage the proper time.

kaolaliangUID: 2758807

Most people prefer others making decision for them than making a decision for themselves.
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Over the recent decades, there is a growing tendency that people prefer making decision by their parents, friends and classmates, etc. On the contrary, a large majority of people still make decision by themselves according to their own knowledge, experience and judgment. As far as I am concerned, I insist the latter opinion for the following reasons as rendered below. . b5 l7 w2 L# y- Y7 [
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It is indisputable that we can achieve success rapidly if someone more professional help us make decision like our parents, for they have lived in this world longer than us and they have a deep and wide understanding on certain things according their own experience and knowledge. For instance, my parents help me choose the university and major in which I involved after high school graduation. It has been proved by my own experience and thought that their decision is absolute right and definitely suitable for my professional development in the future. Due to lacking of life experience on certain events, we do not have such deep understanding as our parents do. Consequently, sometimes decision made by other people for us may be a better choice.
     However, those people, who prefer to making a decision by others, may seem to fail to take into account the fact that what is the most important aspect in our daily life is the independent thinking, which is of great importance in our whole life. There are a large number of things need to deal with by ourselves in life. Take the graduate study for example, whether pursuing a further graduate study or not is totally based on our own decision, not anybody else. If one likes to do research, then he or she can follow his or her own passion and desire to pursue further graduate, after graduation he or she can choose to be a professor at university to continue his or her research. As a matter of fact, this process needs a relative long period, confidence and passion in research area, persistence and sacrifice and so on. In a word, independent thinking and making decision by ourselves are the extremely significant aspects in our life.

   Furthermore, another primary reason that we should make decision by ourselves is that we will contribute more energy and time and efforts to our own decision. It is only us who are responsible for our own decision and there is nothing to do with other person even our parents. Bill Gates, the wealthiest people in the world, who place much attention and effort to computers due to his drop up from the university, which is his own decision. His experience indicates that we will spare no effort to realize our own dreams, which is decided by ourselves.
     Considering all the factors discussed above, we may safely draw the conclusion that independent thinking and making decision by ourselves play a vital role in our whole life. Although decision from others may enjoy some obvious merits, the problem it may cause should not be ignored and far outweigh the advantage.

kaolaliangUID: 2758807

The best way to learn about a foreign country is by reading newspaper or magazines.& b) A7 U. v7 y) g2 B9 ^
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  What is the best way to understand a foreign country? Some person support the opinion that the best way to understand a foreign country is by reading newspaper and magazines. While, as for me, I disagree with this statement due to several reasons. I will illustrate my opinions in the following paragraphs.) R- l# E' U, i# W2 v
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   As a matter of fact, it is indisputable that we can learn about a foreign country by reading newspaper and magazines. With the development and improvement of communication technology, a large number of media like newspaper and magazines could supply us with plenty of latest information in which we want to involve. People could learn about a foreign country with deep understanding of information and materials provided by newspaper and magazines. However, to some certain point, these media are just served for some special organizations or commercial and political purpose, which may have an unbeneficial effect on you judgment and understanding on certain things involved in a foreign country.; c( L8 g! y' Y8 }0 `
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     Apparently, visiting the local museums to learn about a foreign country enjoys more merits than just reading newspaper and magazines. The local museums always have a long history and they also represent the people and culture of the country. Taking the Summer Palace in China for instance, which is the independent museum you should visit in order to learn more about this country who has almost 5000 years long history. When visiting the Summer Palace, visitors can know more about how the old Chinese survived in the past times, how they developed various kinds of entertainment and culture,% C$ R1 z0 b# h. O% O  X& J* I
how they passed and improved a large amount of science and technology from generation and generation, etc. In a word, visiting the local museums may be the most popular and well-know way to understand a foreign country.( \+ O2 R2 i9 L& r" y$ J6 E  k, [

      Furthermore, we can learn more about a foreign country through communication with our parents, relatives, friends and classmates, who can give us much more directly and effective information. These people are all very close to us and we definitely believe them, at the same time they could also give us specific and professional information about a country which is much reliable than that provided by other media.; @6 B4 R: y  \
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Considering all the factors discussed above, we may safely draw the conclusion that it is wise to understand a foreign country by visiting the local museums and getting directly information and comments provided by our parents, friends and classmates.