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[优秀习作] Issue34,请多提意见! [复制链接]

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发表于 2003-6-29 04:52:24 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
34."Instead of requiring students to take courses in a variety of disciplines—that is, courses ranging from the arts and the humanities to the physical and biological sciences—colleges and universities should allow students to enroll only in those courses that will help prepare them for jobs in their chosen fields. Such concentration is necessary in today's increasingly work-oriented society."
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Education is regarded as an indispensable approach for students to prepare for their future social life. Nowadays, the topic of whether students should take courses in a variety of disciplines or should they be allowed to enroll only in those courses is becoming one of the controversial centers between people. Some people argue that since our society is increasingly work-oriented, students must focus on only those courses which will be helpful to their profession-to-be. But I disagree with them for the following reasons:

Firstly, is our society today a work-oriented one? The answer is a definite not. As we have seen, evolution of our society has linked every field more and more close with one another. Let’s take business for example. What is needed for a successful business man today is not simply to know how much he should sell commodities to customers, but also to master the knowledge of psychology, management, and even say, computer considering the increasingly developing of e-business. It is impossible for a car-seller who knows little about the mechanism of cars and aesthetics to promote his car to people successfully. What’s more, there is few people today who engages in a single profession all his life. In one word, modern society refers people who have broad knowledge to those who are simply concentrated on a specific field.

Secondly, job-oriented education does against to students in their personality cultivating. Histories make men wise; poems witty; the mathematics subtle; natural philosophy deep; moral grave; logic and rhetoric able to contend, says Bacon, the famous British philosopher. I do believe that we are born to enjoy the colorful life instead of to be made out of working machines. Albert Enstein, who is regarded as one of the most distinguished scientists in history, is also an excellent violinist. By studying arts, we find beauty around us and learn to appreciate life(生活,life? the life? Our lives?); by physical and biological(此处可省略动词吗?), we know the rules of moving things and structures of animals and plants, which are existing on the earth with us human beings together. It must be recognized that different disciplines of art and science are supplement each other as our two hands are.

However, it should be admitted that it is necessary for students to focus more on their chosen fields. After all, our vim is too limited to turn us into encyclopedia. What is important in this problem is to keep balance between these two aspects. In my opinion, at earlier stage of studying, it is indispensable for students to take courses of varies fields so as to get a balance nutrition; and when entering college, study in a specific field should be emphasized. By saying that, however, I don’t mean that study in other fields should meet their ends then.

From the discussions above, it is not difficult to draw the conclusion that not only the development of modern society, but individuals in it need to compose knowledge of diverse fields organically. Since the utmost aim of education is to help us to build full personalities and to prepare for the society, it is urgently required for students to take varies courses, from arts and humanities to natural science.
(about 530 words)
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Pisces双鱼座 荣誉版主

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发表于 2003-7-1 20:13:01 |只看该作者

Re: [请求]我的第一篇Issue(No.34),请多提意见!

最初由 ihaveadream 发布
[B]34."Instead of requiring students to take courses in a variety of disciplines—that is, courses ranging from the arts and the humanities to the physica..

[/B]

Education is regarded as an indispensable approach for students to prepare for their future social life. social life? just 'life' is enough.  Nowadays, the topic of whether students should take courses in a variety of disciplines or should they be allowed to enroll only in those courses is becoming one of the controversial centers between people.between people? will it be better if u use 'in univ'? Some people argue that since our society is increasingly work-oriented, students must focus on only those courses which will be helpful to their profession-to-be. while giving one side of opinions, will it be better if u provide some different opinions as well?and after that, u show u preference But I disagree with them for the following reasons:

Firstly, is our society today a work-oriented one? The answer is a definite notshould use NO . As we have seen, evolution of our society has linked every field more and more close will
'closer' be better?  how about' much closer'?
with one another. Let’s take business for example. u said' every feild, so, how about use 'businessperson' in stead of 'business'?  What is needed for a successful business man today is not simply to know how much how much?? he should sell commodities to customers, but also to master the knowledge of psychology, management, and even say, computer considering the increasingly developing of e-business. It is impossible for a car-seller who knows little about the mechanism of cars and aesthetics to promote his car to people successfully. What’s more, there is few people today who engages in a single profession all his life. In one word, modern society refers people who have broad knowledge to those who are simply concentrated on a specific field. the last sentence is too absolute. should be changed its way of stating.  

Secondly, job-oriented education does against to students in their personality cultivating. ??  Histories make men wise; poems witty; the mathematics subtle; natural philosophy deep; moral grave; logic and rhetoric able to contend, says Bacon, the famous British philosopher. I do believe that we are born to enjoy the colorful life instead of to be made out of working machines. Albert Enstein, who is regarded as one of the most distinguished scientists in history, is also an excellent violinist. By studying arts, we find beauty around us and learn to appreciate life(生活,life? the life? Our lives?); by physical and biological(此处可省略动词吗?), which verb u wanna omit? taught?we know the rules of moving things and structures of animals and plants, which are existing on the earth with us human beings together. the function of this sentence is?? I t must be recognized that different disciplines of art and science are supplement each other as our two hands are.

However, it should be admitted that it is necessary for students to focus more on their chosen fields. After all, our vim is too limited to turn us into encyclopedia. What is important in this problem is to keep balance between these two aspects. In my opinion, at earlier stage of studying, it is indispensable for students to take courses of varies fields so as to get a balance nutrition; and when entering college, study in a specific field should be emphasized. By saying that, however, I don’t mean that study in other fields should meet their ends then.

From the discussions above, it is not difficult to draw the conclusion that not only the development of modern society, but individuals in it need to compose knowledge of diverse fields organically. Since the utmost aim of education is to help us to build full personalities and to prepare for the society, it is urgently required for students to take varies courses, from arts and humanities to natural science.
(about 530 words)

quite well-done, but there still are some minor mistakes needed to be corrected .
the logic in your writing is quite okay .

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RE: Issue34,请多提意见! [修改]
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