求征三篇待修改的托福独立写作作文(all complete)

saavedroUID: 2423190

由于本人准备暑期的教学需要，所以在此征求一篇新托福独立写作作为课堂上的教学范例。 我会给这篇文章按照新托福独立写作的要求与需求做修改与修正。包括结构，词汇，句式，逻辑等等，然后回复给你。不过需要文章的作者同意我：可以将这篇改正好的文章和原文录入到我的写作讲义中，并允许我用在将来的教学中。

如果有朋友感兴趣的话，可以回帖告诉我。将作文回复到本贴中。回帖后，请修正格式。  暂时只接受1～3篇文章的量度。


要求：1  题目不限，只要是新托福独立写作的文章即可

        2  字数不能低于350字

        3  作者可以选择是否愿意将其gter ID 同步到文章中

        4  修改后的作文修改附带本人评语

Happy-SunflowerUID: 2918017

踊跃应征，感谢楼主~~

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?

It is more important for students to understand ideas and concepts than it is for them to learn facts.

Use specific reasons and example to support your answer.

As students, not only do they have to completely understand some abstract ideas and concept, but they are required to have access to facts which can definitely further illustrate the concepts they learn. Understanding ideas as well as concepts, in a sense, plays an equal important part in students’ learning. It may go to extremes in the case where we must partially figure out which one is more essential.

Understanding ideas and concepts is of great importance no matter when we attend classes or do some research. Hardly can I imagine how unsettling it is when my cousin, Jack, attends class without knowing what a certain simple concept means. He always complains about such an embarrassing situation. Owing to the deficiency of a good understanding of a concept, he fails to concentrate on that class, not to mention following his teacher’s instruction. Likewise, providing a certain idea or concept is not well understood, it is incredible for students to do research or accomplish a paper. Hence, understanding ideas or concepts sometimes actually serve as a prerequisite to conduct an academic program.

Simultaneously, it is never exaggerated to say that learning facts also plays an essential part in a student’s studying. Learning facts is a keystone which goes through a whole research. Without the support of facts, nothing can be brought to a definite conclusion. In this sense, facts are evidences. Especially for a student who majors in litigation law, in chemistry and archeology, learning facts is of vital value. Only by doing tremendous experiment and then learning facts can a student of chemistry department eventually draw an exact conclusion for a certain phenomenon. Only by striving for truth and learning facts can a student of law school find out who is the real criminal. Only by conducting field research and learning facts can a student of an archeology department determine which precise period a buried vase belongs to.

To some point, understanding the ideas and learning facts are codependent. After the enrollment of school, pupils have to come across an astounding number of ideas and concepts, some of which are fairly self explaining while some of which, on the other hand, are utterly hard to understand. Then our teachers make every effort to analyze the latter ones for us. Most of the time, they are leaning to take advantage of some concrete facts to demonstrate certain concepts. For example, as to the concept of “establishing shot”, emerging in the film-making class, initially it was considerably difficult for students to figure out its real meaning. It was not until the professor wisely set showed a certain movie he had watched to illustrate that the students finally fully got a better understanding of that concept.

Therefore, only by both learning facts and understanding ideas as well as concepts can students develop their interests in studying, gain more opportunities to completely develop their skills in learning new knowledge, and better grasp the knowledge they are supposed to learn.

saavedroUID: 2423190

2# Happy-Sunflower

第一篇

aurora0624UID: 3039878

应征
Do you agree with the following statement? Government should pay more attention on health care issues than on environment issues.

Which issue should the government give the priority to, health care or environment, is a frequent topic of discussion when people have placed more emphasis on current affairs. For this issue, I cannot oppose that the environment issues should be the most important consideration from the authorities' aspects.

To start with ,a large amount of researches illustrate that the poor environment quality is the fundamental  cause of many diseases ,particularly in  respiratory and immune systems. Therefore, if the government can create a better living habitat, then it would be possible that the incidence of some diseases may experiences a sharply downward. In this way, we benefit a lot by just focusing in coping with one problem. This is absolutely economy saving, and the authorities can deal with it more effectively.

Additionally, environment issues always effect the country as a whole, and may lead to irreversible problems, like the exhaust of unrewable resources and water pollution, once these problems occur, what we are confronted with is a situation that none  of us could help. So this is the issue that we should spare no efforts to make contributions .Nevertheless, the health care issues are not that of importance, we can handle it by ourselves in some occasion. Take my own experience for example, I jogging every morning in order to keep fit. Jogging is the activity that does not need any facilities, so the government almost pays nothing, in the meantime, I have done exercise.

I would acknowledge that pay attention in public health care is an indispensable part of the government’s obligation, without this basic guarantee, citizens tend to have a sense of  insecurity which may lead to serious social problems, for instance, the instability of the country and the depress of the economy. However, these situations can be avoided if the government can state its reasons why they pay more attention in environment issues rather then health care and allocate money in these two issues properly.

To sum up, I believe that the benefit that government invest in environment issues definitely outweigh in health care issues, especially in terms of sustainable development.

saavedroUID: 2423190

应征
Do you agree with the following statement? Government should pay more attention on health care issues than on environment issues.

Which issue should the government give the priority to, healt ...
aurora0624 发表于 2011-3-26 10:29

第二篇

Happy-SunflowerUID: 2918017

3# saavedro
欢欣雀跃中:loveliness:

aurora0624UID: 3039878

5# saavedro

我什么都同意。。。刚开始练托福作文，求狠批。。。谢谢LZ~

ooozpUID: 2965693

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
In university student should take history courses no matter what field they study?



Nowadays people keep arguing about whether all university students from every majors should have history courses . People from different ages, different countries, different kind of works seem to have a agreeable opinion about this issue. And I believe distinct individual growing in diverse conditions and environment certainly can not hold a same attitude ,personally ,I disagree with the topic that students in university should take a history course no matter what their majors are.
        Firstly it can not deny that learning about history is beneficial to all of students to let them know more clearly about what happened in the past ,for example, how do human keep progressing in thousands of years, how did some amazing inventions are created ,why did people break out wars and so many interesting things. And no one deny that through these we human can conclude and accumulate lots of precious experiences , meaningful methods toward facing difficulties and even some professional knowledge .What is more, to the students who do not hate history having history classes may add much fun to their casual study, they can change their minds which they always have to keep on their major curricular during the history class. I think those above are the positive aspects of giving history class to the university students from different fields.
        However we all know that students in university are usually very busy on attaining their major knowledge ,especially most of the students attempt to get an internship which is very helpful to have a good job after graduate in the future. Therefore they may not have too much time focus on other subjects like history and so on. Take my experience as an instance, when I was studing in  university I try to finish every assignments as soon as possible, as well as possible  given by different teacher on my major Information  Management and Information System. I had to learn how to build up a management system model, how to write an program to realize it ,even more I also need to collect feedback from users and prepared speeches .All of those made me so exhausted already, besides that I sent my resume to variety kinds of companies to get an intern opportunity ,I was sure that if I was asked to take a history class then I would be crazy.
        Another reason that why I do not think taking history course is necessary is all of the students in university of my country used to learn history in their prior education such as junior middle school and senior middle school .So all of them have already got history related knowledge ,they do not have waste time on learning this after their entering  university ,they should pay more attentions to their majors .Some students who love history very much may have chosen history as their major ,if they do not they would spend the spare time in going on a deeper research .Of course students who do not show much inclination on history would spend more time in other things in this busy world.
        
求狠批。。

saavedroUID: 2423190

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
In university student should take history courses no matter what field they study?



Nowadays people keep arguing about whether all univer ...
ooozp 发表于 2011-3-26 13:46

第三篇

saavedroUID: 2423190

踊跃应征，感谢楼主~~

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?

It is more important for students to understand ideas and concepts than it is for them to learn facts.

Use specific ...
Happy-Sunflower 发表于 2011-3-26 10:24

weaselUID: 2739489

额啊额啊，已经满了

Happy-SunflowerUID: 2918017

10# saavedro
super 感激楼主^0^
弱弱地问：汉译英训练法是怎么操作呢，有没有可以独立自主就可以训练的方法啊？比如，是否有一套不错的资料，比如新概念3和4，自己对着中文然后翻译英文么？

Go2011GoUID: 3006241

活动结束了哎....:funk:

saavedroUID: 2423190

应征
Do you agree with the following statement? Government should pay more attention on health care issues than on environment issues.

Which issue should the government give the priority to, healt ...
aurora0624 发表于 2011-3-26 10:29

saavedroUID: 2423190

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
In university student should take history courses no matter what field they study?



Nowadays people keep arguing about whether all univer ...
ooozp 发表于 2011-3-26 13:46