ISSUE20 thanls for your correction!!!

beckhamwiseUID: 142845

20"National governments should devote more of their social programs and services to children than to adults."

Position: Children deserve more attention from the government than adults.
A) Children have not their own thoughts formed about complex things in the world, and they are more likely to be hurt.
B Children are the hope of the nation.
C To keep children in good condition is to do good to their parents.
D Social programs and services should also be devoted to adults.

  It is definitely correct that children need more attention than adults. In modern society, more and more people pay their care to children, and this trend has no sign to cease. The saying, that is, national government should devote more of their social programs and services to children than to adults, is in fact true, for the reason that children seems more important to the whole society.

Children, also called sub-adults, may have less or no ability to survive in the world, for they have not their own thoughts formed about complex things in the world, as a result, are more likely to be hurt. None of us have the inborn capability to communicate with others, the wise to solve problems, and the method to get requisition for our life. Then, how do we get all these essentials? The answer looks easy. Certainly, we learned them when we grow. Childhood, the right period of growth, is just the very time when we are becoming strong, but still vulnerable before we make it. A contrast will illustrate this evidently. If an adults, although not very strong, lose his way in the forest, and in the meantime, the same case happens to a child, and there is no chance for them to meet. Who do you think will survive? With no doubt, if there is one can, the adult will survive. With no capacity of supporting himself, the child will inevitably meet some trouble that will not do harm to the adult, at least not so serious. So, to protect the weak, it is sure that the priority of the government should give to children, not adults.
  
  What is more, it is always said that children are the hope of the nation. It is absolutely impossible for each one to remain young, and vigorous. Since we will all become old, and will make less contribution to the society, children nowadays, who will replace their predecessors, will take the obligation to construct the country. Whether a country has a prosperous prospect depends on whether the children. If they are not well educated, and not protected, it is certain that the burden will seem much heavy for them. To the contrary, if they receive the toppest education and live in a suitable condition, in every aspects will they do well, and the future of the nation must be exciting.

  Most family has at least child. To keep children in a good condition indirectly does good to adults, who have children. At present, the average portion of one family's income devoted to child has no inclination to drop, but increases sharply. For example, as most parents want their children to receive the best education, many American families choose to move to a district where there is an excellent school. Even a family that is not wealthy is eager to afford a high tuition for the child. Considering this, we can believe that nearly everyone cares for his child, and doing good to his child is equal to doing good to himself. Then, that is the strongest reason for the governments to devote their social programs and services to children.

  However, adults should also take a position in the society, for they are the force that put the nation forward. Imagining that adults are given no consideration from the government, who are willing to make contribution for the country? And do not forget that children must depend on their parents, who are also adults. There is certainly no possibility for children to live a good life if their parents have not.

  In sum, children, with no doubt, deserve the priority of the government, which should devote social programs and services to them. In the meantime, officials ought to not neglect adults, who make the progress of the whole society.

fortitudesagUID: 139374

It is definitely correct that children need more attention than adults. In modern society, more and more people pay their care to children, and this trend has no sign to cease. The saying, that is, national government should devote more of their social programs and services to children than to adults, is in fact true, for the reason that children seems more important to the whole society.

Children, also called sub-adults, may have less or no ability to survive in the world, for they have not their own thoughts formed about complex things in the world, as a result, are more likely to be hurt.(两句话至少用一个and相连，as a result好像不行吧？） None of us have the inborn capability to communicate with others, the wise to solve problems, and the method to get requisition for our life. Then, how do we get all these essentials? The answer looks easy. Certainly, we learned them when we grow.（这两个短句和起来好一些？） Childhood, the right period of growth, is just the very time when we are becoming strong, but still vulnerable before we make it. A contrast will illustrate this evidently. If an adults, although not very strong, lose his way in the forest, and in the meantime, the same case happens to a child, and there is no chance for them to meet. Who do you think will survive? With no doubt, if there is one can, the adult will survive.（少年英才也有啊！你说绝了） With no capacity of supporting himself, the child will inevitably meet （damaged by既然是比较，要注意等效，meet与harm就不行) some trouble that will not do harm to the adult, at least not so serious(副词）. So, to protect the weak（这点没论证，凭什么啊，it is a body without its legs), it is sure that the priority of the government should give to children, not adults.

What is more, it is always said that children are the hope of the nation. It is absolutely impossible for each one to remain young, and vigorous(可以加一个unless限定，显得全面，上帝还不能完全否认呢，现在这个不是正在研究吗？用基因或克隆的技术。）. Since we will all become old, and will make less contribution to the society, children nowadays, who will replace their predecessors, will take the obligation to construct the country. Whether a country has a prosperous prospect depends on whether the children. If they are not well educated, and not protected, it is certain that the burden will seem much heavy for them. To the contrary, if they（这个代词最好不代） receive the toppest education and live in a suitable condition, in every aspects will they do well, and the future of the nation must be exciting.

Most family has at least child.（这是主题句吗？我水平低，只会看主题句放在段首的。） To keep children in a good condition indirectly does good to adults, who have children（这个从句起什么作用？）. At present, the average portion of one family's income devoted to child has no inclination to drop, but increases sharply. For example, as most parents want their children to receive the best education, many American families choose to move to a district where there is an excellent school. Even a family that is not wealthy is eager to（try their best to更好一点，力所不及，eager没有落实） afford a high tuition for the child. Considering this, we can believe that nearly everyone cares for his child, and doing good to his child is equal to doing good to himself. Then, that is the strongest reason for the governments（虽然时刻回现主题是个好习惯，但不能就落实一句啊？） to devote their social programs and services to children.

However, adults should also take a position in the society, for they are the force that put the nation forward. Imagining that adults are given no consideration from the government, who are willing to make contribution for the country? And do not forget that children must depend on their parents, who are also adults. There is certainly no possibility for children to live a good life if their parents have not.

In sum, children, with no doubt, deserve the priority of the government, which should devote social programs and services to them. In the meantime, officials ought to not(ought not to更常用） neglect adults, who make the progress of the whole society.

平时可以多改文章，现改别人一篇或几篇，就会给自己改了，然后提高就快了。
努力！

beckhamwiseUID: 142845

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