issue217 修改稿n多

lovebrianUID: 157127

最初由 lionel 发布
[B]关于original的定义问题，从广义上来说，只要不是全篇引用或者摘抄别人的思想和文章，就属于original。

举个最近讨论的火爆的一个新闻为例子吧，中国的WAPI标准，其实就..

以下省略...... [/B]

你举的这个例子我倒不懂~~~不过original看来是广义写了~~谢谢！

sniper613UID: 147372

To xqmelissa:
举例子的确要说自己熟的，我就爱说物理上的东西
但是一直说经济太单调，用很多创造发明可以用啊

imongUID: 140258

我插一句啊
在实验室的时候就想到这个事情，没想到正好有人写这个题目

不仅是original work和remain to be made的问题，如果不查资料文献的话搞不好什么都做不出来，更不用说original了。学有机化学的人都知道磺酸酯OTs的制备早就是常规技巧了，但是我们实验室最近一个月搭了快20锅反应愣是做不出来，后来查了文献才明白过来似乎反应的设计上有些问题：一开始的后处理纯属乱来，而且反应物本身比较特别，不是一般的alcohol.

做磺酸酯算不上original，但是如果不查文献，闷头做，这也做不出来。那么如果要做original的work，所涉及的设计方案的分析，论证可行性，对比，优化......不查文献？开什么玩笑。

imongUID: 140258

第一个body还可以，如果有CONCRETE example就好了。

后面两个一个跑得比一个严重。这样看：把文章给简化成Thesis+TS，一共就4个句子，然后你再看看是个什么感觉。想想你后两个TS是不是合适。

a-->b-->C，题目给出的b-->c，你的TS立论A-->B，然后整个段落狂写A-->B，丝毫不涉及后面一个关键的b->c的话，当然给人感觉off the topic.

这是共性问题，一定要注意。

而且这篇文章零散出击严重，三个部分很难成为一个integrity，这和上面的问题是相通的。

nmetterminatorUID: 150707

Issue 217
In order to produce successful original work, scholars and scientists must first study the successful work of others to learn what contributions remain to be made.
为了产生成功的作品，学者和科学家必须首先学习其他人的成功作品，进而知道还有哪些成就是没有做的。


The speaker suggests that scholars and scientists should study others’ works firstly and find out the remaining contribution in order to produce their own original work. I strongly agree with this assertion, since researching others’ work could gain not only the background knowledge, but also some inspirations.

No one could produce any original work without assimilating the former contributions in relative fields. As a student, we have deep impressions about the arduous and dull tasks before doing a research, referring to many books or magazines and collecting much information, especially the students in social science. Why is this process necessary? One obvious explanation is that the background knowledge obtained from former contributions is important as a basement of the new research. There is one famous maxim which could support this statement clearly 加逗号said by Newton that “If I have seen further than certain other men it is by standing upon the shoulders of giants”. It clearly explains the function about former contributions as a foundation of an original work and a stimulus of new ideas.

With the development of social conditions, many premises and assumptions in former contributions have been altered. Just these defects are where we could revise or change, and then possibly make our own contributions. Take economic theories for an instance. It is not exaggerated to draw a conclusion that nearly all theories in economy, especially in modern ages, are developed from revising or questioning basic assumptions in former theories. The H-O model, a main theory in international economics, emphasizes the important function about factor endowments in international trade, whose basic assumptions are the countries as trade partners should have a similar production function, a consumer preference, and so on. However, these restrictions are too difficult to be satisfied in real world. It is Leontief, an American economist, who discovered that the reality contradicted with the theory, called the Leontief Paradox. As a result, he relaxed 是不是RELEASED？ some assumptions in H-O model and obtained his own original contribution which is more suitable for checking out the current situation. Therefore, there are always some shortcomings in former works, one should firstly study successful works and try to find the place needed to be improved, and then obtain the original work. 一定失学business的！要我可想不出来这样的例子。He he.

In a large sense, what is called “original” work is usually not a work fully new, but an improvement on the work done by previous scholars and scientists. Sciences have developed thousands years, inducing that it is too difficult to explore a fully new domain undiscovered by predecessors, unless one has extraordinary original creative ideas, such as Einstein’s principle of relativity. 差的句子太多了，有点乱了，宾语不明显。 Most scholars and scientists are not as genius as Einstein, so the best way to gain their own work is to make an improvement on formers’ works, either works in their own field or other relative fields. Gravity Model, a current popular economic model using in calculating regional trade in regional organizations, comes from a basic theory in physics. This mode seems a fully original creation in economics, but in fact it is only an improvement on the basis of an existing theory referred from another field. Therefore, gaining a real original work, not being discovered by predecessors, becomes so difficult that many original works are nothing more than amendments from existing contributions.

To sum up, the feasible approach to gain an original work is to study others’ work at first in order to get background knowledge and inspirations, and then learn the remaining contributions. (577 words)

百分百学经济的，举了两个经济学上的例子，而且都很不错。就是倒数第二段的那句长句感觉有点晕。

nmetterminatorUID: 150707

最初由 imong 发布
[B]第一个body还可以，如果有CONCRETE example就好了。

后面两个一个跑得比一个严重。这样看：把文章给简化成Thesis+TS，一共就4个句子，然后你再看看是个什么感觉。想想你..

以下省略...... [/B]

觉得imong说得很对，我就经常犯这种逻辑错误。还是非常有必要重视一下的。但不知有没有什么好办法来改正？

eaglezhouUID: 156651

No one could produce any original work without assimilating the former contributions in relative fields.这句话是不是要加个限定会好点，no one好像不恰当？
In a large sense, what is called “original” work is usually not a work fully new, but an improvement on the work done by previous scholars and scientists. 作定义是不是在开头会比较好呢？

噜噜熊UID: 155151

可能有点用吧！
"One never notices what has been done; one can only see what remains to be done "
                                                          -------------------Marie Curie

另，突破和发展都是从可以指original－－广义
1 突破：找前人不对的地方或错误。
2 发展：找前人不完善的地方－没错误只是不完全。
无论那种，都是来源于对前人工作的研究。

xqmelissaUID: 140370

恩
觉得噜噜熊的观点好象和我的比较像啊

大家的意见研究研究，先下去写更BT的题目，明天思路清晰时继续跟贴讨论啊

xqmelissaUID: 140370

最初由 eaglezhou 发布
[B]No one could produce any original work without assimilating the former contributions in relative fields.这句话是不是要加个限定会好点，no one好像不恰当？
In a l..

以下省略...... [/B]

nod nod
严重nod！
谢谢指出来，非常好的建议！
bow~~~~~~~~~~~~~

paisleyUID: 64183

我没觉得跑题啊。挺好的么。还有是不是要在original这个词上做文章，个人可以不同的。如果抓住这个词展开也可能是篇很好的文章，不过不需要大家都这样写啊

rainlannyUID: 68597

最初由 gdhdanny 发布
[B]Take economic theories for an（不用an） instance.  [/B]

这个地方有问题，但是问题不是an。
区别在于： for instance /example   没有an
但是，take sth as an   instance/example 就有an，但是这里应该是as

最初由 nmetterminator 发布
[B]Sciences have developed thousands（of） years, （这里缺少连词，例如so） inducing that it is too difficult to explore a fully new domain undiscovered by predecessors, unless one has extraordinary original creative ideas, such as Einstein’s principle of relativity. 差的句子太多了，有点乱了，宾语不明显。[/B]

这个句子不乱，条理应该没有问题。我建议你加强GRE阅读的练习。


说说文章。我看了文章，又看了看大家的评论。至于original的问题，只要记住这个和copy是对立就好。（那是不是对contribution的理解也会有一定的影响？总之这个contribution并不像在汉语中有那么大的意思。个人观点）。关于两个通用的例证，牛顿和爱因斯坦，尽管很多人用，但是没什么问题。如果你用一个大家都不知道的，岂不是更麻烦？论证的过程中仅用到经济学领域的例子，当然这个和大家的专业有关。如果了解较多的东西，当然换换可能比较好。但是，就像xqmelissa自己说的，还是举自己熟悉的例子，这样比较容易自圆其说！

文章没有什么问题，但是我觉得，把对“original work”的定义放在最后，给人很突兀的感觉。但是我试着把那一段提出来，在前面又加不进去。看看其他人有什么看法。

xqmelissaUID: 140370

最初由 nmetterminator 发布
[B]Issue 217
Sciences have developed thousands years, inducing that it is too difficult to explore a fully new domain undiscovered by predecessors, unless one has extraordinary original creative ideas, such as Einstein’s principle of relativity. [/B]

复杂吗?
大意是这样的:
科学发展了数千年,导致很难再对前人完全突破了,除非有个别极为突出的有创造性思想的人,比如,爱因斯坦的相对论那种.

lovebrianUID: 157127

最初由 xqmelissa 发布
[B]OK
刚回来，就看见狒狒给我提意见了

以下省略...... [/B]

呵呵~~~~~我又回到这儿了~~~看来讨论得很热烈！

啊。。我撤消对题目跑题的怀疑~~~~差点犯了一个大错误，issue题目本来就是主张自由发挥的~~~~~写跑题的难度还是比较大的！
本文没有跑题  是大家的理解不同罢了~~~

其他的大家都说的各有道理 呵~~
我觉得这种bt长题目 还是按照逻辑分析法来破题 比较清楚地说

dezhiUID: 156141

Issue 217
In order to produce successful original work, scholars and scientists must first study the successful work of others to learn what contributions remain to be made.
为了产生成功的作品，学者和科学家必须首先学习其他人的成功作品，进而知道还有哪些成就是没有做的。


The speaker suggests that scholars and scientists should study others’ works firstly and find out the remaining contribution 这个表达方法和what contributions remain to be made可以互换吗？觉得有些怪怪的 in order to produce their own original work. I strongly agree with this assertion, since researching others’ work could help one gain not only the background knowledge, but also some inspirations.

No one could produce any original work without assimilating the former contributions in relative fields. As a student, we have deep impressions about the arduous and dull tasks before doing a research, referring to many books or magazines and collecting much information 这个并列结构的形式不统一，如果词性能一致就更好了，另外可以直接说：referring to collecting more information from books, magazines, and other sources, especially the students in social science社会科学，这里是不是把范围限制小了？. Why is this process necessary? One obvious explanation is that the background knowledge obtained from former contributions is important as a basement of the 觉得用a更好 new research. There is one famous maxim which could support this statement clearly said by Newton that “If I have seen further than certain other men it is by standing upon the shoulders of giants”觉得这句有些复杂，不如拆成两句说的好. It clearly explains the function about former contributions as a foundation of an original work and a stimulus of new ideas.

With the development of social conditions, many premises and assumptions in former contributions have been altered have changed更简洁.首句并未点明本段中心，这样好吗？ Just these defects 条件改变就可以认为是defects吗？ are where we could revise or change, and then possibly make our own contributions. Take economic theories for an 不定冠词是不是多余？ instance. It is not exaggerated to draw a conclusion that nearly all theories in economy, especially in modern ages, are developed from revising or questioning basic assumptions in former theories. The H-O model, a main theory in international economics, emphasizes on? the important function about factor endowments in international trade, whose basic assumptions are that可以省略吗？ the countries as trade partners should have a similar production function, a consumer preference, and so on. However, these restrictions are too difficult to be satisfied in real world. It is Leontief, an American economist, who discovered that the reality contradicted with the theory, called the Leontief Paradox 这句读起来有些别扭，不如：who discovered the phenomenon of the reality’s contradiction with this theory, which was called the Leontief Paradox. As a result, he relaxed some assumptions in H-O model and obtained his own original contribution which is more suitable for checking out the current situation. Therefore, there are always some shortcomings in former works, 少连词的说~~ one should firstly study successful works and try to find the place needed to be improved, and then obtain the original work.

In a large larger? sense, what is called “original” work is usually not a work fully new, but an improvement on the work done by previous scholars and scientists. Sciences 科学这一抽象名词，可以有复数吗？ have developed thousands of years, inducing that it is too difficult to explore a fully new domain undiscovered by predecessors, unless one has extraordinary original creative ideas, such as Einstein’s principle of relativity. Most scholars and scientists are not as genius as Einstein, so the best way to gain their own work is to make an improvement on formers’ works, either works 这个works可省，要不然用的次数有些多了 in their own field or other relative fields. Gravity Model, a current popular economic model using in use in是什么意思？ calculating regional trade in regional organizations, comes from a basic theory in physics. This mode seems a fully original creation in economics, but in fact it is only an improvement on the basis of an existing theory referred from another field这句和前面那句好像是在重复说一件事情，可不可以合二为一？. Therefore, gaining a real original work, not being discovered by predecessors, becomes so difficult that many original works are nothing more than amendments from existing contributions.

To sum up, the feasible approach to gain an original work is to study others’ work at first in order to get background knowledge and inspirations, and then learn the remaining contributions. (577 words)