issue223 教育不仅仅是个人的事。欢迎指正。谢谢。

panda2727UID: 138271

223. "Education is primarily a personal matter; it has little to do with school or college."

1education由个人操作的好处。
2仅仅个人的力量不足以全面掌握知识。
3学校教育比起个人努力的好处。
4教育不仅不仅仅是个人的事， 还是社会的事。

It seems that the education is primarily a personal matter, because the object that the education focuses on is individual, which means that, to everyone, it is the individual who receive education. Sine that, is education a purely personal matter? If it is true, there is no need to set up schools and colleges. However, it is not the case. Education is not a primarily personal matter.

Incontestably the personal effort on education has its own benefits. Firstly, the individual can freely choose what subject he or she wants to learn. In common sense, people have great interest in what they decide to learn by themselves. Interest is the most useful impetus to drive people to study, and consequently the results of study, generally speaking, are satisfied. Secondly, the individual can decide when to study, and cannot be restricted by the fixed time. People can study when they are in good condition, or they can study after participating some important parties. Both study and entertainment will not be missed.

Unfortunately, studying alone has its own flaws to limit people manage the knowledge better. During the study, everyone will face problems that cannot be solved depending on the individual current ability. Unluckily, there are not any partners or tutors to ask for help, which making the problems not solved. So people cannot manage the knowledge well. Someone may argue that the individual can find out the solving methods in the libraries. Of course, it is the way. But in common sense, the libraries in society cannot compare with them in the colleges, no matter the quantity or the quality, especially in some professional aspects. In addition, even though the education is primarily a personal matter, people also should not ask for help in society. Or making experiments? there is no suitable equipment and necessary condition. Only relying on the individual ability, no person can afford enough resource to achieve what he or she wants to prove his or her ideas.

On the other hand, students studying in schools or in colleges help their quick improvement. There are tutors in the class to explain the complex points, making them more easily to understand. And the library and the labs have played important role to help students in schools to manage the knowledge. For example, the theories learned in physics can be illustrated in the labs, while the individual education cannot enjoy those conveniences. Furthermore, in school, students can receive complete education. Besides the major subjects, students also receive education on science, social science and humanities fields. In addition, the lectures are often hold on campus broaden students' views. All of that knowledge helps students to be a full development ones. Only depending on individual ability, people cannot ensure these achievements.

Education is also a social business. When a person receives education, no matter he or she studies by himself or herself or studies in schools and colleges, it is already a social matter. People, receiving education and developing, definitely will influence the society. And education has played important role to decide whether the effect to society is beneficial or not. So to be in the charge of the society itself, society is paying attention to education, and then education has been a social business.

Education is not only a primarily personal matter. It not only should depend on the schools and the colleges, but it is also a social business, needing supervising from society. Education needs the individual, the schools and colleges and the society working together to develop a suitable educational atmosphere.

poohUID: 146994

来互改一下https://bbs.gter.net/showthread.php?s=&threadid=243145
:)

netbugwangUID: 157454

It seems that （the） education is primarily a personal matter, because the object that the education focuses on is individual, (which means that, to everyone, it is the individual who receive education)我觉得这句罗嗦了。. Since that, is education a purely personal matter? If it is true, there is no need to set up schools and colleges. However, it is not the case. Education is not a primarily personal matter.还是有些罗嗦

Incontestably the personal effort on education has its own benefits. Firstly, （the ）individual can freely choose what subject he or she wants to learn. In common sense,（Common sense tells us that） people have great interest in what they decide to learn by themselves. Interest is the most useful impetus to drive people to study, and consequently the results of study, (generally speaking)罗嗦, are satisfied. Secondly, the individual can decide when to study, and cannot be restricted by （the ）a fixed time. People can study when they are in good condition, or they can study after participating some important parties. Both study and entertainment will not be missed.

Unfortunately, studying alone has its own flaws to limit people manage the knowledge better. During the study, everyone will face problems that cannot be solved depending on the individual current ability. (Unluckily), Unfortunately there are not (much) partners or tutors to ask for help, which making (makes) the problems not solved. So people cannot manage the knowledge well. Someone may argue that the individual can find out the solving methods in the libraries. Of course, it is the way. But in common sense, the libraries in society cannot compare with them in the colleges, no matter the quantity or the quality, especially in some professional aspects. In addition, even though the education is primarily a personal matter, people also should not ask for help in society. Or making experiments? there is no suitable equipment and necessary condition. Only relying on the individual ability, no person can afford enough resource to achieve what he or she wants to prove his or her ideas.

On the other hand, students studying in schools or in colleges help their quick improvement. There are tutors in the class to explain the complex points, making them more easily to understand. And the library and the labs have played important role to help students in schools to manage the knowledge. For example, the theories learned in physics can be illustrated in the labs, while the individual education cannot enjoy those conveniences. Furthermore, in school, students can receive complete education. Besides the major subjects, students also receive education on science, social science and humanities fields. In addition, the lectures are often hold on campus broaden students' views. All of that knowledge helps students to be a full development ones. Only depending on individual ability, people cannot ensure these achievements.

Education is also a social business. When a person receives education, no matter he or she studies by himself or herself or studies in schools and colleges, it is already a social matter. People, receiving education and developing, definitely will influence the society. And education has played important role to decide whether the effect to society is beneficial or not. So to be in the charge of the society itself, society is paying attention to education, and then education has been a social business.

Education is not only a primarily personal matter. It not only should depend on the schools and the colleges, but it is also a social business, needing supervising from society. Education needs the individual, the schools and colleges and the society working together to develop a suitable educational atmosphere.


今天太晚了， 快熄灯了，先该到这。
楼主的主要问题在语言。 主要是罗嗦。Which means 这种 句子得写出细节。不是凡来复去说同样词句。长句用法不好。 The 这个词用错的较多。用词欠火候。不过俺也如此。共勉。

panda2727UID: 138271

谢谢你。恩，记下了。从你这儿意识到了一些东西。十分感谢。
呵呵，希望你能帮我改完。
PS：你是否是四川人？

哎，写的时候老是想把逻辑说得很完整，考虑方方面面。结果适得其反，反而罗嗦了。

haiyaUID: 187989

It seems that the education is primarily a personal matter, because the object that the education focuses on is individual, which means that, to everyone, it is the individual who receive education. Sine that, is education a purely personal matter? [这句话有点别扭----However, is education a purely personal matter?]If it is true, there is no need to set up schools and colleges. However, it is not the case. Education is not a primarily personal matter. (我觉得开头转弯多了点，ets会晕的)

Incontestably[,] the personal effort on education has its own benefits. Firstly, the individual can freely choose what subject he or she wants to learn. In common sense, people have great interest in what they decide to learn by themselves. Interest is the most useful impetus to drive people to study, and consequently the results of study, generally speaking, are satisfied. Secondly, the individual can decide when to study, and cannot be restricted by the fixed time. People can study when they are in good condition, or they can study after participating [in] some important parties. Both study and entertainment will not be missed.

Unfortunately, studying alone has its own flaws to limit people manage the knowledge better. During the study, everyone will face problems that cannot be solved depending on the individual current ability. Unluckily, there are not any partners or tutors to ask for help, which making the problems not solved. So people cannot manage the knowledge well. Someone may argue that the individual can find out the solving methods in the libraries. Of course, it is the way. But in common sense, the libraries in society cannot compare with them in the colleges, no matter the quantity or the quality, especially in some professional aspects. In addition, even though the education is primarily a personal matter, people also should not ask for help in society. Or making experiments? there is no suitable equipment and necessary condition. Only relying on the individual ability, no person can afford enough resource to achieve what he or she wants to prove his or her ideas.[硬件]

On the other hand, students studying in schools or in colleges help their quick improvement. There are tutors in the class to explain the complex points, making them more easily to understand. And the library and the labs have played important role to help students in schools to manage the knowledge. For example, the theories learned in physics can be illustrated in the labs, while the individual education cannot enjoy those conveniences. Furthermore, in school, students can receive complete education. Besides the major subjects, students also receive education on [nature] science, social science and humanities fields. In addition, the lectures are often hold on campus broaden students' views. All of that knowledge helps students to be a full development ones. Only depending on individual ability, people cannot ensure these achievements.[软件]

Education is also a social business. When a person receives education, no matter he or she studies by himself or herself or studies in schools and colleges, it is already a social matter. People, receiving education and developing, definitely will influence the society. And education has played important role to decide whether the effect to society is beneficial or not. So to be in the charge of the society itself, society is paying attention to education, and then education has been a social business.

Education is not only a primarily personal matter. It not only should depend on the schools and the colleges, but it is also a social business, needing supervising from society. Education needs the individual, the schools and colleges and the society working together to develop a suitable educational atmosphere.


感觉整篇文章结构清楚，理由支持的也比较充分。
用词上还要斟酌一下：）。
如果我写，我觉得我会更注重放在relationship，两方面写。即学生对学校的影响
觉得楼主说的是单方面以及对社会的影响。

panda2727UID: 138271

谢谢haiya。
你的建议是一个很不错的思路。relationship的两个方面。但是我认为真正写起来好象不是很好操作。