ARGU38 最后一篇阿狗 谢谢各位G友一直以来的帮助!

深谷幽兰UID: 196550

38,The following memo appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria Public Health Council.
'An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study reports that in nearby East Meria, where fish consumption is very high, people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Clearly, eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds. Since colds are the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, we recommend the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism.'
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The author, in this argument, recommends that the daily use of Ichthaid is a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism. However, a careful consideration will reveal how groundless the argument is.

One problem is that the rare visit to the doctor does not mean that eating the fish will help prevent the people in the nearby East Meria from catching colds. Firstly, it is entirely possible that the doctors there charge too high for the public to afford, or perhaps these doctors are not good enough. In this case, the people there, although having caught serious colds, are likely to treat themselves with some medicines or go the visit doctors in other places rather than the local ones. Secondly, even assume that the people there do have a lower rate for colds; however, the argument overlooks other alternative explanations for the lower rate. Perhaps they have a better lifestyle or perhaps that they pay much attention to the sports, which will strengthen their bodies to prevent themselves form any forms of diseases. Thus, because of the lack of enough information, the conclusion of the argument is unwarranted.

Another problem is that even assuming that eating fish will help prevent colds, the argument lacks evidence to guarantee that the use of Ichthaid will efficiently prevent colds. As it is said in the argument, the Ichthaid is derived from fish oil, however, there is no evidence to convince people that the substance that has real function to prevent colds is in the fish oil. Perhaps it is in the other parts of the fish or perhaps in the process of produce the Ichthaid, the substance has disappeared. Thus, since the argument offers no evidence to ensure the Ichthaid has the same effect as the fish, we cannot convince that the Ichthaid will help prevent colds.

Finally, the argument too hastily assumes that colds are the most frequent reasons for absences in essence. Common sense tells us that people tend to sleep more in the winter time than in the spring. In this case, it is possible that those absent merely sleep overtime and they just want to find a good enough excuse. Or perhaps they have some other things what they do not want to let others know. Therefore, lacking convincing evidence, the argument cannot assess that colds are the real reason for absenteeism.

To sum up, the conclusion of the argument does not hold water. To strengthen the argument, I need more information about the reasons for the rare visit to the doctors in nearby East Meria. Meanwhile, the author should provide more convincing evidence to demonstrate the Ichthaid does have the function of preventing colds as well as the absenteeism rate will be sure to be lower with the decrease of the colds.

山涧风笛UID: 196557

占位子，学习一哈子。

Henrry_FFUID: 165187

The author, in this argument, recommends that the daily use of Ichthaid is a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism. However, a careful consideration will reveal how groundless the argument is.

One problem is that the rare visit to the doctor does not mean that eating the fish will help prevent the people in the nearby East Meria from catching colds. Firstly, it is entirely possible that the doctors there charge too high for the public to afford, or perhaps these doctors are not good enough. In this case, the people there, although having caught serious colds, are likely to treat themselves with some medicines or go the visit doctors in other places rather than the local ones. Secondly, even assume that the people there do have a lower rate for【of】 colds; however, the argument overlooks other alternative explanations for 【the lower rate(换成it)】. Perhaps they have a better lifestyle or perhaps that they pay much attention to the sports, which will strengthen their bodies to prevent themselves form any forms of diseases. Thus, 【because of the lack of enough information感觉放在后面好一点】, the conclusion of the argument is unwarranted.【太多perhaps or perhaps的结构，可以换一下】

Another problem is that even assuming that eating fish will help prevent colds, the argument lacks evidence to guarantee that the use of Ichthaid will efficiently prevent colds. As it is said in the argument, the Ichthaid is derived from fish oil, however, there is no evidence to convince people【us】 that the substance that has real function to prevent colds is in the fish oil. Perhaps it is in the other parts of the fish or perhaps in the process of produce the Ichthaid, the substance has disappeared. Thus, since the argument offers no evidence to ensure the Ichthaid has the same effect as the fish, we cannot convince that the Ichthaid will help prevent colds.

Finally, the argument too hastily assumes that colds are the most frequent reasons for absences in essence. Common sense tells us that people tend to sleep more in the winter time than in the spring 【time】.【 In this case, it is possible that（也有重复的味道）】 those absent merely sleep overtime and they just want to find a good enough excuse. Or perhaps they have some other things what they do not want to let others know. Therefore, lacking convincing evidence, the argument cannot assess that colds are the real reason for absenteeism.

To sum up, the conclusion of the argument does not hold water. To strengthen the argument, I need more information about the reasons for the rare visit to the doctors in nearby East Meria. Meanwhile, the author 【should provide more convincing evidence（重复）】 to demonstrate the Ichthaid does have the function of preventing colds as well as the absenteeism rate will be sure to be lower with the decrease of the colds.

【不错！基本上该批的都批中了，语言上略显有点单一，让人有重重复复的感觉，可以多看些近似可以替换的表达，让ETS感觉到你用词造句的多变，分数才能上去。继续努力哦！：）】

nora0020UID: 104886

学习，学习

深谷幽兰UID: 196550

最初由 Henrry_FF 发布
[B]【不错！基本上该批的都批中了，语言上略显有点单一，让人有重重复复的感觉，可以多看些近似可以替换的表达，让ETS感觉到你用词造句的多变，分数才能上去。继续努力哦！：）】
以下省略...... [/B]

谢谢！
没时间努力了，明天就考了~~~~~~ :(

AlierUID: 159518

写得不错，第一段展开得很好，但感觉后两段就相对显得展开不够。
不过总的很好了，我还要多多学习！

nora0020UID: 104886

38,The following memo appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria Public Health Council.
'An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study reports that in nearby East Meria, where fish consumption is very high, people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Clearly, eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds. Since colds are the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, we recommend the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism.'

The author, in this argument, recommends that the daily use of Ichthaid is a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism. However, a careful consideration will reveal how groundless the argument is. 很简洁不错啊

One problem is that the rare visit to the doctor does not mean that eating the fish will help prevent the people in the nearby East Meria from catching colds. Firstly, it is entirely possible that the doctors there charge too high for the public to afford, or perhaps these doctors are not good enough. In this case, the people there, although having caught serious colds, are likely to treat themselves with some medicines or go the visit doctors in other places rather than the local ones. Secondly, even assume that the people there do have a lower rate for colds; however, the argument overlooks other alternative explanations for the lower rate. Perhaps they have a better lifestyle or perhaps that they pay much attention to the sports, which will strengthen their bodies to prevent themselves form any forms of diseases. Thus, because of the lack of enough information, the conclusion of the argument is unwarranted. 说了两个原因，也可能与生活习惯，天气情况有关，也可能鱼有毒不能吃

Another problem is that even assuming that eating fish will help prevent colds, the argument lacks evidence to guarantee that the use of Ichthaid will efficiently prevent colds. As it is said in the argument, the Ichthaid is derived from fish oil, however, there is no evidence to convince people that the substance that has real function to prevent colds is in the fish oil. Perhaps it is in the other parts of the fish or perhaps in the process of produce the Ichthaid, the substance has disappeared. Thus, since the argument offers no evidence to ensure the Ichthaid has the same effect as the fish, we cannot convince that the Ichthaid will help prevent colds.

Finally, the argument too hastily assumes that colds are the most frequent reasons for absences in essence. Common sense tells us that people tend to sleep more in the winter time than in the spring. In this case, it is possible that those absent merely sleep overtime and they just want to find a good enough excuse. Or perhaps they have some other things what they do not want to let others know. Therefore, lacking convincing evidence, the argument cannot assess that colds are the real reason for absenteeism.

To sum up, the conclusion of the argument does not hold water. To strengthen the argument, I need more information about the reasons for the rare visit to the doctors in nearby East Meria. Meanwhile, the author should provide more convincing evidence to demonstrate the Ichthaid does have the function of preventing colds as well as the absenteeism rate will be sure to be lower with the decrease of the colds.
还有可能鱼油对人有很大的副作用，对人体有害
我加了一点我的看法，希望对你有用
总的来看，还不错，就这样去考试吧
没想到怕你的第一篇A竟然是最后一篇

深谷幽兰UID: 196550

最初由 nora0020 发布
[B]我加了一点我的看法，希望对你有用
总的来看，还不错，就这样去考试吧
没想到怕你的第一篇A竟然是最后一篇以下省略...... [/B]

谢谢!
偶就信心十足地去考试了~~~~~~~~~~~~ :)  ;)  :p  :D