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闯天
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电梯直达

楼主

发表于 2008-8-4 21:19:00 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

考试时间：明年6G，报的今年年底的机考作文。自身基础：百分制时代的CET6合格，基础一般，但荒废已久，单词量不高，思维僵化。 
 
计划制定：学习了众多前辈的经验后，曾于7月中旬拟定了为期1个多月的“入门+积累”复习计划，按理现在应复习过半，可惜中途因故未能按计划执行。 
 现调整计划为“Aug. 3 to 27 入门+积累”复习计划，昨天第一天。 
 每天13点前将当天写的文章贴出，每天21点前完成互改。 
 
发帖目的：1、督促自己将计划执行到底，将复习进行到底。 
 2、得到各位路人的指点，无论您是高人前辈、隐者大侠、新手同学……先拜谢！ 
 3、复习日程表+献丑练习贴均恭迎拍砖。 
 4、昨发于太傻，未能成功在寄托发帖。但因复习计划的ISSUE练习题目是以追星剑教程为指导，所以觉得有必要报备于此。 
 
————————————————————————作文练习贴目录——————————————————— 
2、3楼：Aug. 3：I 17, A 25 
4、5楼：Aug. 4：I 17, A 25（重写）

[ 本帖最后由闯天于 2008-8-31 15:08 编辑 ]

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沙发

发表于 2008-8-4 21:27:47 |只看该作者

Aug. 3：I 17

TOPIC: ISSUE17 - "There are two types of laws: just and unjust. Every individual in a society has a responsibility to obey just laws and, even more importantly, to disobey and resist unjust laws."
WORDS: 363
TIME: 00:45:00
DATE: 2008-8-3 下午 04:23:02

自查问题：1、审题功力还待加深；
                  2、语言表达贫乏，找不到合适词汇；
                  3、须加强例子储备；
                  4、字数偏少，写作时间较紧。

Laws are the regulation of the world, which are drawn to lead us to do right things and do things right. However, there are two types of laws: just and unjust. Therefore, I do agree that, every individual in a society has a responsibility to obey just laws and, even more importantly, to disobey and resist unjust laws.

Laws here we discussed, means the specific regulations of a country. Laws are drawn by people who are in charge of the country. Obviously, each law is not perfect, but is need to be perfect, so as to catch the pace of the changing society. Whether it is for the most people's interest, is the standard to asset a law is just or not. Thus, we should treat laws differently.

As mentioned, just laws are in accordant with the interest of people. For example, Law of Protecting Consumers' Rights in China, has helped many consumers. Furthermore, the law also works on supervise the enterprises to produce qualified product and provide excellent service. In a conclusion, obeying just laws like that is equal to take measures to make our life better by ourselves. Thus every individual in a society wish to live a better life.

On the contrary, unjust laws are harm to the interest of people. Once in many countries, women are not allowed to have the same rights with men, such as go to school, go to work, etc.
But it is known to all, women have some specific advantages. Many statistics shows that, women are much calmer facing emergency. Only when many smart and brave people struggled the equal rights for women, women begin to show their features. So, for unjust laws, we should disobey and resist.

In fact, comparing with obey just laws, disobeying and resisting unjust laws is more important. Just laws could lead us to do right things and do things right, while unjust laws works on the contrary direction, which is much more harm to our society, maybe will destroy our well-being society. Generally speaking, every individual in a society, should obey just laws to be right, and much more importantly, should avoid unjust laws to be wrong.

2008-08-03 Issue17 Argument25.doc

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Aug. 3：I 17, A 25

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板凳

发表于 2008-8-4 21:29:18 |只看该作者

Aug. 3： A 25

TOPIC: ARGUMENT25 - The following appeared in a memo from the mayor of the town of Hopewell.
"Two years ago, the town of Ocean View built a new municipal golf course and resort hotel. During the past two years, tourism in Ocean View has increased, new businesses have opened there, and Ocean View's tax revenues have risen by 30 percent. The best way to improve Hopewell's economy, and generate additional tax revenues, is to build a golf course and resort hotel similar to those in Ocean View."
WORDS: 253
TIME: 00:26:51
DATE: 2008-8-3 下午 04:23:02

自查问题：1、对ARGU类作文的写作方式还须加强认识，审题功力还待加深；
                  2、语言表达贫乏，找不到合适词汇；
                  3、须加强例子储备；
                  4、字数偏少，写作时间较紧。

From the memo, we can know that, the mayor of the town of Hopewell, wants to learn from the town of Ocean View. But, in my opinion, before the action, there are some questions to be discussed.

Firstly, a new municipal golf course and resort hotel, built by the town of Ocean View two years ago, may be not the contribution to the increased tourism of the town during the past two years. That is, there maybe some other real factors. For example, maybe the scenery of the opponent of the town happened to be destroyed, and tourists have no other better choice except the town of Ocean View.

Secondly, the material doesn't show new businesses have opened during the past two years is related to the new municipal golf course and resort hotel. In fact, new business may has relation with the talented people or good position there.

Thirdly, the material also doesn't show Ocean View's tax revenues have risen by 30 percent is the result of the new municipal golf course and resort hotel. Maybe the town of Ocean View increased the tax interest.

In a conclusion, a new municipal golf course and resort hotel may have the active function with the Ocean View's economy, but we can not say they are the direct reason. And if the town of Hopewell want to improve economy, the mayor should do some more deep investigation, and make a thorough analysis of their own advantages, then make a decision what should to be done.

[ 本帖最后由闯天于 2008-8-4 21:30 编辑 ]

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地板

发表于 2008-8-4 21:34:27 |只看该作者

Aug. 4：I 17（重写）

TOPIC: ISSUE17 - "There are two types of laws: just and unjust. Every individual in a society has a responsibility to obey just laws and, even more importantly, to disobey and resist unjust laws."
WORDS: 438
TIME: 00:45:00
DATE: 2008-8-4 下午 01:10:33

审题：一、关键词：just and unjust

   二、提纲： 1、重述题干；表明态度：赞同分类，且前肯——后看情况。

               2、定义法律，并界定本文讨论范围。

               3、前肯：赞同obey just laws。

               4、后看情况：（1）法制体系完善的国家，法律渠道unjust laws；

                           （2）昏君领导国家，有效途径可能只有违背、反抗。

               5、结论

自查问题（老问题）：1、字数偏少，写作时间较紧；
                  2、语言表达贫乏，找不到合适词汇，进而耽误时间；
                  3、须加强例子储备。

感受：1、看范文后，审题思路清晰了些，字数有所增加；
   2、思路清晰后，语言贫乏、例子缺乏是面临的最大难题。

Laws play an important role in the modern time, which are influential from an individual to a whole country. The opinion of the statement clarifies the laws into two types according to fairness, and advocates obeying just laws, while disobey and resist unjust laws is more importantly. As for my view, I do agree laws can be chaired into two types related to fairness, and every individual has a responsibility to obey just ones, but I think we should handle differently with unjust ones under different circumstance.

Laws are established by those who in charge of a specific country in most cases. Generally, the function of laws is to ensure the right and interest of the majority member in the country. And the laws usually works by inform members the regulation of behavior pattern. Thus there are no absolute just and unjust laws. Whether it is just depends on the standing point. Hence, the standard of just laws here is that they are responsible for the majority people's benefits.

To begin with, about just laws, every individual has a responsibility to obey them. As described the definition of just laws, they are mean to benefit the majority people's life. For example, Chinese government has established the law which bans any more plastic bags usage in the super market since June 1st, 2008. The law do well for protect the earth which is our all mankind's unique hometown. Certainly, every individual should advocate such just laws.

Secondly, we should take different attitudes on unjust laws in different circumstances. On the one hand, if the unjust laws are established in a country with a well-formed legislation structure, every individual could express the suggestion through a proper legal way, and it is also the responsibility for the every individual. Otherwise, extreme ways may break the stability and order of a country, a society. The result is to harm the whole member's benefits. On the other hand, if the unjust laws are in a country under the charge of wrong governors, the possible efficient way to change is to disobey and resist them. For an instance, many brave and wise heroes only can gain success by struggle with the cost of life at revolution time in many countries.

In a sum, laws are established to protect the benefits of specific group with some certain background. With the development of economy and society, laws are needed to be amending to be in accord with the change. However, no matter how the laws changed, there will always be just and unjust laws at the present time. To make life better, every individual in a society should know what right things are and how to do right things.

2008-08-04 Issue17 Argument25.doc

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Aug. 4：I 17, A 25（重写）

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5楼

发表于 2008-8-4 21:35:52 |只看该作者

Aug. 4： A 25（重写）

TOPIC: ARGUMENT25 - The following appeared in a memo from the mayor of the town of Hopewell.
"Two years ago, the town of Ocean View built a new municipal golf course and resort hotel. During the past two years, tourism in Ocean View has increased, new businesses have opened there, and Ocean View's tax revenues have risen by 30 percent. The best way to improve Hopewell's economy, and generate additional tax revenues, is to build a golf course and resort hotel similar to those in Ocean View."
WORDS: 218
TIME: 00:22:56
DATE: 2008-8-4 下午 01:10:33

审题：一、错误：1、原因和结论无必然联系，论据不充分。
                              2、背景交代不清楚。
         二、提纲：1、开头段。
                              2、驳斥1：原因-结论。
                              3、驳斥2：原因-结论。
                              4、驳斥3：原因-结论。
                              5、驳斥4：背景交代。
                              6、结论。

自查问题：1、字数偏少，不升反降；
                  2、语言表达贫乏，找不到合适词汇；  尚有时间，但无话可说。
                  3、须加强对ARGU错误类型的掌握。

感受：1、看题目分析后，作文思路清晰了些；
         2、思路清晰后，语言贫乏，停留在简单罗列，且驳斥顺序的安排有待加强。

The statement is seemed reasonable, but there are some obvious mistakes.

Firstly, there is no evidence to show tourism increase in the town of Ocean View is due to the new-built municipal golf course and resort hotel. There are many other possible reasons, such as good climate, convenient transportation, etc.

Secondly, there is no evidence to show new-opened businesses in the town of Ocean View are because of the new-built municipal golf course and resort hotel. For an instance, maybe there are new resources found in the town of Ocean View.

Thirdly, there is also no evidence to show the risen tax revenues in the town of Ocean View leaded by the new-built municipal golf course and resort hotel. As we know, increase the tax interest can cause the risen tax revenues.

Last but not the least, there is lack of introduction of some important back surrounding. For example, is the economy of the town of Ocean better than that of the town of Hopewell? Is there any municipal golf course and resort hotel in the town of Hopewell? Do both towns have the same natural resource and social foundation?

In a conclusion, the best way to improve Hopewell's economy is based on a clear investigation of the own town, and a thorough analysis on learning other experiences.

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6楼

发表于 2008-8-4 21:38:25 |只看该作者

革命路途真艰难呀！

忙活了一上午，结果也只是看了几篇范文，把昨天写的重改了下，依然问题很大。
唉，知道自己憋几小时恐怕也攒不够字，干脆限时写成什么样就什么样。
在这个基础上来改吧。——欢迎大家大刀阔斧！

无颜江东父老今感冒头痛不见好转，若勉强成文，恐低劣不堪。遂决定今天计划调整到明天，今天改为继续打打基础。

THE 1ST SHAME DAY！

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闯天
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7楼

发表于 2008-8-6 00:06:19 |只看该作者

It's my day today.

经过2天1盒藿香正气液的灌输，今天晚上开始终于在远离感冒了。
根据G友对我拙作的拍打，并诚挚提出的治本建议，决定调整计划，在11日前都以基础为主，好好看看巨人们是怎么做的。

戒躁！

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8楼

发表于 2008-8-31 14:14:57 |只看该作者

经过前期的打基础工作，发现自己的差距不小，现已第二次调整计划。
打基础和训练同步进行。目前只求按部就班，稳步提高。
9月7号再来汇报进度执行情况。

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9楼

发表于 2008-8-31 20:12:02 |只看该作者

鼓励

且陶陶，乐尽天真。

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oyhd
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10楼

发表于 2008-9-3 20:06:09 |只看该作者

我也是十二月份考作文．
我的处女作也是ＩＳＳＵＥ１７要不我们互拍一下
There are two types of laws:just and unjust.Every individual in a society has a responsibility to obey just laws and,even more importantly,to disobey and resist unjust laws."

The statement claims that there are only two kinds of incompatible laws :one is just law;the other is unjust law.And what we should do is to obey the just laws and  to disobey the  unjust ones.However, the author simply categorize any laws as either just or unjust.As far as I am concerned, it is impossible for most laws to be considered as either just or unjust.Admittedly,to some extent there are laws which are unjust,however,can we disobey or resist such laws?Perhpas;but in most cases what we should do are not those actions.

To begin with,can we simply judge whether a law is just or unjust?No reasonable one can deny that there are some laws which are unjust on some occassions,but it may be just in most cases.Consider ,for example ,that If a lawis unjust for only one person,however,is just for  999 peraons; then we can not say that the law is an unjust law.However,if we were the person who receive a unjust judgement according to that law we would regard that as an unust one.So as an individual we cannot know whether the law is just for most people .

In addition,how can we judge whether the law is just for a citizen.We cannot simply say a law is just for someone because she/he can get benefit from it.That does not mean we cannot judge with regard to that respect. Meanwhile, because of the distinct background and various attitudes toward what is just  perhaps A consider it is just while B don not agree.So if everyone has a responsibility to judge whether the law is just for someone,we may get countless answer for only one case.Accordingly,on balance  as a common person we can not judge whether the law is just or unjust.

Last but not least,the law is not some company or school rules that you can disobey if you think it is wrong.The law is the base of governing the country.If everyone has the right to disobey the law .How can the law hold its authorities?If the law can not hold the authorities ,our country will have to face nurmous troubles.So as an individual we should not have the rights to disobey and resist laws.

Yet no reasonable person could believe that we can do nothing to protect ourselves.Nevertheless what we can do if the law is really unjust for most people is to appeal to the government to edit the law or put out a new law to replace the current one.Only in that way can our society be just and steady.

To sum up,the statement simply put the law into two groups:one is just law ;the other is unjust one.Yet we cannot judge the law instantly just because it is unjust for one person.We should know whether it is just for most people.Moreover we have no clear rules to judge whether the law is just or not when it comes to a practical  case.And in any case we cannot disobey or resist the law even the law is a unjust one.What we should do is to protect ourselves by the just laws.

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